According to the chart on the wall that I was staring at, it was the day before Harry's birthday. And for the first time since waking up at St. Mungo's, neither my dad nor Remus were sitting in my room. Dad had told me yesterday that they wouldn't come until later today since they were finally picking up Harry from his miserable aunt's house. I was restless to see Harry, especially since no one had seen him since the day after the attack at the Ministry. But my brother wasn't the only one I was anxious to see. Apparently the twins had been taking turns sitting in the waiting room, when they weren't working at their new shop.
As a result of being holed up in my room for days on end, I had devised a number of plans to escape from my room to go to Diagon Alley to see their new shop. I knew if I made it to the waiting room unseen that whichever twin was sitting there would bring me out for a day trip to Diagon Alley. But there were several hinderances to this plan. First was the fact that I was still weak on my feet. Healer Poke had finally let me try standing yesterday, but I could only make it to the lavatory on my own before growing shaky and falling to the floor.
Apparently my knee had broken at some point during my detainment and had regrown improperly. The healers were able to reset it but the joint was still weak.
Second was the fact that although I wasn't mad, I still had some trouble keeping straight what was real. Sometimes when I woke up to see my father and Remus in the room I would start reciting my verses that I used to keep my mind steady, only to become more frantic when I couldn't control my reality like I wanted.
Healer Poke had explained it to my family that it was a coping mechanism I had acquired. But it upset my father to hear it even though the healer explained that it was probably what had kept me from going mad. A month under the Cruciatus Curse was unheard of in his career, and my mother was living proof of what was supposed to happen.
When Healer Poke came in on his morning rounds, I fixed my most steady gaze so he might grant me my wish today.
"Good morning, Marnie," he greeted with his professional smile.
"Are they here?" I asked eagerly, having worn through my patience during the hour I had already been restlessly awake.
His appraising look didn't seem as concerned as he had been in the beginning and I was taken aback when he finally offered a small smile in return.
"Well, your father and uncle are out so maybe having the Weasley boys in here would be a small step. I just want to keep the number of people in your room to a minimum for now since it seems you do better with less stimulus," Healer Poke scanned my charts again, looking much more patient than I felt.
But I forced my anxious hands to go still since I didn't want the healer to think that I was going to have another fit. I was grounded right now and didn't want to mess up my first chance to finally see Fred and George.
"Alright, I'll go get them. I already ran into them on my way in today," Healer Poke explained before stepping out of the room to go and retrieve my two best friends.
I allowed myself to excitedly thrum my fingers to let out some of my pent up energy. It was so stuffy in this room and I felt a sense of foreboding whenever I was alone and realised my mother had spent the last fourteen years just down the hall for a very similar prognosis. So I wanted to prove myself as quickly as possible so I could leave this place.
"Hare?" my gaze darted up to the door to see two excited looking redheads staring back at me.
I took a moment to close my eyes and then reopen them to establish that this was real life. I had to take this in small strides since I wanted to spend as much time as I was allowed with them instead of pushing myself too far into a fit. I needed to get better and also show the twins that there was nothing to worry about. Based on the fear I could see in their eyes, I knew they weren't just excited to see me. They were also relieved to finally see for themselves that I wasn't mad or seriously injured.
"Hi Fred… George. I'm so sorry I missed the opening of your shop," I started as the twins stepped into the room.
I couldn't think of anything else to say to them but also wanted them to know that I was really upset I hadn't been there like I promised. But this only earned me a double eye roll from the two of them. It did however cut the nervousness and was enough of an invitation for the twins to step comfortably into the room and each take a seat beside me.
"Merlin, she get's abducted and she's still apologizing," George replied with an easy smile.
But Fred looked far less relieved than his brother and only continued to stare at me intently.
"Freddie?" George asked, unsure of what his brother was thinking after seeing his girlfriend for the first time since they had left Hogwarts on their brooms.
A lot had happened in the past two months, most of which they hadn't been able to work through together. It had been the three of them for so long and dealing with Marnie's abduction separately had been unbearable on several different levels. And it seemed that Fred's grief was finally coming to the surface now that he was being confronted with Marnie in person.
"I couldn't protect you," Fred whispered as he moved to sit onto the foot of the bed.
"No one could Fred, it was my own damn fault," I replied, remembering clearly how Bellatrix had grabbed onto me the moment Harry caught up to us and used Voldemort's sudden arrival as a diversion to kidnap me.
The next moment I had been transported to the Malfoy Manor where I was tortured on and off for a month until apparently I was rescued by Mr. Weasley and Kingsley Shacklebolt.
When I sat up, I tried hiding the wince I felt at moving my very stiff body in order to grab onto Fred's hand. Feeling my touch, he turned but looked up to see how much I was struggling.
"For Merlin sake Hare, don't strain yourself on my account," Fred panicked and helped me to lie back down.
But I smiled through the pain and tried to get one out of Fred. He was always the most easy going out of the three of us and typically went through life bearing a grin. Now it was all I wanted just to see one cross his face.
"I want to protect you too, you know," I replied evenly.
In response to this I heard a scoff and looked over to see George's playful look of feigned annoyance. It felt right to be falling back into our trio, like the past two months hadn't kept us separated.
"You two are hopeless," George mocked.
But even though both boys were relaxing a bit, there was still a nervousness between us. I knew they had questions but I didn't know how stable I was to answer them. So far I was able to keep myself in the present, overwhelmed by my own happiness to be with them, but that could all change if I fell back into the past.
"So what's the shop like?" I asked, offering the twins an alternate topic of conversation than the overbearing one that heavily weighed between us.
They smiled at this and Fred moved to sit closer beside me on the bed, keeping hold of my hand. In return, they both reported how well the shop was doing and how Lee and the girls had really stepped up to help since they had spent a lot of time in the hospital over the past month. I frowned when they told me this, but they shrugged it off.
"It's brilliant! We're getting all the students on summer holiday and we're gearing up for once the school lists come out," George beamed excitedly.
I found it much easier to focus on things like the twins' shop since I knew without a doubt that it existed. It seemed that when it came to people, that's when my mind went fuzzy. Bellatrix had asked lots of questions about Harry and Dumbledore. She had also asked about Sirius and taunted me with his death. My mother and father were also used to threaten me, so I sometimes found it hard to focus on who was really with me and if those relationships in my head were real. Especially when I used people's names to ground me, sometimes I thought when people were right in front of me that they were actually being pictured in my head.
"Angelina suggested we have a section just for witches," George spoke through my thoughts, sounding very proud but I didn't miss the blush cross his face.
I smiled back at him and hoped that he and Angelina might give each other a chance to be happy. I also wondered if me being kidnapped and then being in the hospital hindered the possibility of my two friends entering into a relationship together.
"Yea, but you wouldn't like it Hare. It's mostly love potions and Pygmy Puffs. You would definitely like the prank section best," Fred added heartily.
He squeezed his hand in mine as we lay side by side. His other arm wrapped over my head on the pillow and I was able to lean into his side. His scent was another comforting way to keep me grounded. The smell of mint and gunpowder was as familiar as my cottage, making me feel safer that I had since leaving Hogwarts.
The twins kept talking about their shop, filling me in on their success and new product ideas. I asked about everything they had been up to, and the hours seemed to pass easily without any mention that I had been kidnapped and tortured for the past month. Fred and George didn't even mention the Department of Mysteries and I wondered if Healer Poke had ordered them not to. I knew better by now than to ask my own questions about the outside world since no one ever answered them. But dad did always assure me that Harry was safe and that I would be filled in once the healers allowed it.
But talking just the three of us was exactly what we all needed. I didn't want to have to recount or collect my thoughts to be able to explain what happened after I was taken from the Department of Mysteries. After a while I felt myself grow tired but only leaned further into Fred and let them continue regaling me with their stories. I didn't want to fall asleep yet but I let myself settle in the normalcy of it all instead.
"Marnie?" I didn't know how long it had been when the three of us looked up to see Healer Poke peaking his head in.
I smiled at him and saw the promising look he returned. I knew I had passed whatever test this was and hopefully that meant I could continue seeing the twins on an everyday basis.
"Sorry, but your father is here now and there's something we wanted to try today," Healer Poke explained in an enthusiastic voice.
I piqued at this, feeling motivated to make myself better enough to leave the confines of this locked ward.
"We'll come back tomorrow, love," Fred squeezed my hand reassuringly before he carefully moved to get off the bed.
George leaned over to kiss my forehead since I guess he assumed my body was too sore to properly give a hug. I smiled back at him appreciatively before he smiled and exited the room. Healer Poke grabbed my chart to add some notes, also giving Fred and me the chance for a moment of privacy.
Fred looked uneasy to be leaving me and suddenly I didn't want to be left alone either. I knew how much I had been missing the twins, but after spending the better part of the morning and early afternoon with the twins, it left me feeling uneasy now that they were leaving.
"I love you Hare, so much. I've been coming everyday and won't stop coming until I get to take you home. George and I have set up the loft above the shop and you can come stay with us if you want?" Fred said softly as his lips inched closer to mine.
He kissed me softly and I could only lean my neck forwards to deepen it since my arms were too slow to go over his shoulders before he was pulling away.
I also didn't get to ask Fred about the fact that he may have just asked me to move in with him and George before he left my room.
"Hi darling," my father stepped in right after Fred exited, probably having been waiting outside the door.
Healer Poke stayed in the room and closed the door behind my father.
"Where's Harry?" I asked eagerly and my father returned a warm smile.
"He's at home with Remus. As long as you have a good day today, I'll bring him along with Remus tomorrow. He's really eager to see you but Healer Poke sent an owl saying not to push it today since you visited with the twins and now we're going to try answering some questions," my father's voice dropped off at the end.
I stopped myself from arguing against not being able to see Harry, especially since I was feeling fine after my visit with the twins. But the offer to answer some of my questions was far too tempting to pass up.
"You're going to tell me what's been going on?" I asked eagerly, feeling my mind start reeling with the information I wanted; like where was Voldemort now and what was the Order doing to stop him?
"Yes Marnie, we think you've gotten enough rest for this. We know you've been very patient and have been asking questions about what happened. So, with your father in the room, we want to allow you to ask anything you want and we can begin our own assessment of how your treatment over the last month has effected your thoughts. So, if we can start, you may begin asking any question you want," Healer Poke officially gave me permission to speak.
It was nice to know this man had treated my mother over the years and was familiar to me even before he became my attending healer for the past few weeks. It had also been frustrating to be having terrible nightmares since I woke up in the hospital and everyone had been ordered not to talk about anything or answer any of my questions. Now, I felt anxiety rise up in my chest but swallowed it back down since I needed my questions answered.
"Sirius—is he dead?" I asked, knowing this was one of the last things I saw before Bellatrix abducted me.
It was also something she would talk about all the time in front of me as a form of torture all in itself. My father gasped in response and I turned my attention to him. I realised he was probably going to be the one to answer a lot of my questions since the healer wasn't privy to the Order's existence.
"Yes, he was killed by Bellatrix," my father replied solemnly.
Tears already clouded my eyes but I didn't let myself start crying yet. Also, since I believed he had been murdered, this wasn't new information, but it did still feel like someone was pulling at my heart.
"Did Voldemort possess Harry?" I continued, now remembering watching Harry laying on the ground as Bellatrix bound my mouth to prevent me from screaming out and led me to the fireplace where we escaped.
"Yes, He Who Must Not Be Named found out about his connection with Harry and used it to lure Harry to the Ministry. He then showed up himself and tried to kill Harry but Dumbledore arrived and saved him," I saw the pained look in my father's eyes.
Of course he must have been relieved that Harry was saved, but was he resentful that I had been taken in his place?
"Is Cedric dead?" I asked.
This time Healer Poke spoke up. I watched my father's eyes deepen in their sadness, maybe because I was asking about things that happened over a year ago.
"Yes Marnie, Cedric Diggory died during the Triwizard Tournament. It's even been confirmed by the Ministry now that it was at the hands of You Know Who," he answered more evenly than my father's replies.
"Did the brains turn Ron mad?" I inquired, remembering how they latched onto him.
"Ron is fine Marnie, he's even been in to see you," Healer Poke answered again.
The events from the Department of Mysteries were more or less lucid in my mind. I just wanted confirmation that my thoughts were real and also that everyone was safe. Also, confirming that Cedric and Sirius were dead allowed me to feel grief instead of frustration and enabled me to be able to move forward.
Healer Poke ended our question period soon after, not wanting to push me too far since I had yet to have another fit. I was given some Sleeping Draught and fell asleep to the sounds of my father murmuring with the healer, probably about his worries for bringing Harry tomorrow.
xx
"Listen Mr. O'Hara, I've been treating your wife for a long time, along with Alice and Frank Longbottom. I have a pretty good idea of how they got here fourteen years ago. I want your daughter to avoid a similar fate to your wife and I also want to keep my staff safe. I have already talked with Dumbledore and our first priority is to treat Marnie. That being said, none of the nurses are privy to what really happened to Marnie in detail and my notes are written in shorthand. Your secret is safe with me and I will make sure Marnie receives the best possible care," Healer Poke assured.
Joss exhaled, rubbing a tired hand over the back of his head.
"You're doing a good job, being a guardian to both Marnie O'Hara and Harry Potter. I'm sure the papers aren't reporting the full truth and I can tell you that only care for their health and safety. So let me do my job Mr. O'Hara and take on some of that burden. Marnie can ask any of her questions and I will make sure nothing is said outside of that room," both men nodded at this agreement before Healer Poke was summoned to another room over the PA system.
Joss was left standing in the corridor, wanting desperately to visit his wife and just talk to her about Marnie and how scared he was about her scattered memories. Or about Harry and how obviously under stress he is with the new rumours of him being the Chosen One to take down He Who Must Not Be Named. But with the thought of Harry in his mind, Joss turned and went to exit the hospital. Harry was really at Grimmauld Place instead of the cottage, where most of the Order was waiting, so Joss would return to try and talk to his adopted son. He loved both of the children whom he called his own, and only hoped he wasn't as useless to them as he felt.