Author's Note: (Read it please!)

*HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MISHA COLLINS!*

Lucy Colt, Lilian Colt,: thanks guys for your reviews, glad you liked the last chapter and I hope you will like that one too :D

latin gypsy sam: thanks for your awesome reviews and I hope you will like the rest of the chapters as well :)

I'mcrazyfordean, Martine, Jannine90, Libby, my girls, love you all and thanks for everything.

-Hey guys, the result of the poll are up, according to the votes and reviews and all, most of you-except for one vote-agreed on the weekly update but I'm really sad from the lack of reviews, and if you want a weekly update I need you to tell me what you think of the chap, its like my crack so keep them coming.

-One last thing, starting this chapter things will get little different, the story is rated M as you all know, but not like the last 25 chaps, starting this one things will get more violent and tense in actions, characters and events-not to mention the sexual part-little bit, I'm just warning.

I added a pic for Eve's PJ on the profile.

Now enjoy!

*Hold on to me love

You know I can't stay long

All I wanted to say was I love you and I'm not afraid

Can you hear me?

Can you feel me in your arms?

Holding my last breath

Safe inside myself

Are all my thoughts of you

Sweet ruptured light it ends here tonight

...

"Thanks Cas!" Eve thanked Castiel for taking her home to Bobby's house, she was in her room.

"You're welcomed," Castiel said. "I guess Sam and Dean will be here tomorrow, that's if Arial didn't get them now!"

"Dean won't leave the Impala, but he will be freakin' mad at me for knocking them out and for leaving to see Adam, and me leaving with you too!" Eve said sitting on her bed taking a deep breath. "Castiel, you really cannot tell them about what I'm going to do, not Dean, not Sam and of course not Arial…,"

"But he is your guardian angel Eve, he has to know!" Castiel interrupted.

"I know, but still you can't tell him and don't tell Bobby either!" Eve asked.

"I'm sorry Eve, I can't do that." Castiel said making her angry.

"What the hell Cas? Its my damn life and I'm asking you not to tell them, its my right and you only need to do what I'm telling you!" she snapped and suddenly burst out into tears, covering her face with both of her hands. "I'm sorry but…,"

"It's fine!" Castiel cut her off sitting next to her. "You're going to sacrifice yourself, I can take whatever you're doing now, but I have to tell Arial, I have no other choice also Dean and Sam, and Bobby can help too, you know there will be rituals!" he told Eve.

Eve looked at him with her blurry eyes nodding her head. "But you will be here when I need you, right? I mean Arial and Dean probably will kill me before doing this right when they know, and I bet Bobby and Sam will join the party too, so I need you to support me, okay?" she asked still crying.

"Sure, I will be here to support you, I understand what you want to do and after all it is your life!" Castiel said standing up. "Though, I don't agree that you killing yourself and I hope there was another way to do it but,"

"Thanks Cas, I don't want to die, not really but I have to do this." Eve said. "And as you said there is no other way!" Castiel was silent avoiding her looks. "Is there is another way and you're not telling me Cas?" Eve asked but again, Castiel was quiet. "Why? I don't think anything would be worse than me killing myself so,"

"There is another way but," he paused. "Look, your relationship with Adam was built on love right?" Eve nodded. "That love between you two is part of the problem, because you're still attached to him, losing that love will break the bond!"

"I don't love him anymore!" Eve stated. "Hell no, I hate his guts, I don't even feel guilty anymore, I don't love him."

"You have to prove it!" Castiel told her. "And I can't say how!"

"Fuck Cas," Eve snapped. "What do you mean you can't say how?" she asked but Castiel was silent and didn't answer her. "You answer me or…," Eve started threatening but Castiel just vanished. "Son of a BITCH!" she screamed.

Bobby heard Eve's scream from down stairs; he grabbed his gun running up stairs to see what the hell was going on, especially since he didn't know that Eve was even home. Bobby got to the room kicking the door open his gun towards Eve.

"Eve?" Bobby exclaimed.

"Nice to see you too Bobby!" she said sarcastically.

"Weren't you…,"

"With Sam and Dean, yeah but Castiel flied me here!" Eve interrupted. Bobby kept looking at her waiting for her to talk. "I won't talk now Bobby, sorry but I need some rest and I will tell you everything later ok?"

"Is everything ok?" Bobby asked in concern.

"Not really Bobby, not really!" Eve huffed. "But, I want you to keep Dean away, he might kill me so," Bobby chuckled.

"Don't worry! I let you rest now!"

"Thanks!"

Once Bobby got out of the room, Eve took off her clothes and went to take a shower; once she was done she wore her PJs and went to get some rest, she laid in her bed on her back staring at the ceiling thinking.

...

Closing your eyes to disappear

You pray your dreams will leave you here

But still you wake and know the truth

No one's there

...

Eve's point of view,

I'm going to die, lovely. I just came out of a seven year damn coma a few months ago and now I'm going to die, I don't want to die, no one wants to die I mean especially now, after all this, after finding him. But once again I have to do this, I don't want to but I have to, I only hope for one thing, that sacrificing myself will help stopping Adam, I don't want to die for nothing, not really. Shit I'm still 26, too young to die, I'm silly and just thinking of that makes me laugh but I'm going to die a virgin too, funny huh? That makes me laugh even harder.

I was ready to die once I came back from the coma and I was about to give up twice, first time when that ghost was going to kill me, and the second time when that filthy vampire was sucking the life out of me, I was ready and willing to die but all that was before I realize one important thing about my feelings, now I wonder should I tell him or not, if I told him what I really feel and left him that would be the worst thing to do, and maybe he doesn't feel the same so it won't be great either, oh god, I never thought dying is this hard and once again its so painful that I can't stop laughing.

All I know now that I need to settle down some things before I go, the plan of killing myself to save the world thing, in case it worked. I need to call some people and Libby is the first to call, then maybe Simon. My mum! I don't know, I mean what am I going to tell her, "hi mum, I'm calling to let you know I'm going to kill myself, have a nice life, bye!" no I won't call anyone except for Elizabeth, not even Simon, not Mark-my brother-not worth it anyway.

But, but why I miss them all, I never missed my family, I mean my blood related family, my bossy mum, my backstabbing brother or my uncles. This is weird that I miss them now, GOD! Once again I never thought dying is this hard, but waiting for my own death isn't fun, and why am I laughing, I think I'm going nuts, some kind of a defense mechanism I guess to make things easier, but it's not really helping, getting closer to death makes you see things different, missing my family, that's new; Laughing again.

...

Say goodnight

Don't be afraid

Calling me calling me as you fade to black

...

Eve was still laying in her bed thinking-laughing hysterically and crying-about what she would do and how she was going to deal with everything before its all gone, should she talk to Dean or not, to call her family or not, what she was going to do with Arial, lots of things and she couldn't focus, she was tired and just wanted to get it done with. So she grabbed her phone to call to call Libby.

"You've got to tell me what happened on your date!" that was the first thing Libby said once she answered the phone, even before saying hi making Eve chuckle.

"Well hi to you too Lib," Eve sarcastically said.

"Sorry but I thought you would call me right when you came back from your date, I wanted to know. When Dean called me and told me about him asking you out for a date and he asked me about the things you like and all, I was dying to know what will happen," Libby said. "Oh, by the way, that Dean guy has such a sexy voice!" she giggled making Eve laugh too.

"Did anyone tell you before that you're a talking machine? Seriously stop talking for a second." Eve chuckled, teasing.

"Come on Muffins, and yes lots of people told me I talk too much but its part of my charm, you know that!" she said and both of them laughed. "So, tell me, have you kissed? Umm where did he take you? Oh, oh or you went for it and did the deed?"

What Libby asked made Eve laugh so hard on it. "Libby, not all of us do that on their first date!" Eve teased and laughed harder.

"Hey!" Libby protested. "I only did that once you know, and the guy was irresistible!"

"Yeah, was he that irresistible? Or you were just a slut?"

"Umm, both!" Libby said and both of them giggled. "Now come on tell me about the date, was it good?"

"It was perfect, the best date I ever had, and thanks for your help too, Dean told me you gave him some info," Eve told Libby.

"Well he went through trouble to give you a good date so he looks like a good man, I'm so happy that I helped," Libby paused. "Eve, are you crying?" she asked in concern.

"Yes, I'm crying!" Eve said barley able to talk. "Things got all messed up Elizabeth, its just…Adam!" that was all what she needed to say before burst out into tears.

"Eve, stop crying sweetie and tell me what happened, stop crying before I cry too!" Libby said about to cry too.

Eve told Libby what happened since she knocked Arial out till Castiel got her back at Bobby's after flying her out of that damn town.

"Now, I'm waiting for Sam and Dean to show up to figure out what to do," Eve finished.

"What you gonna do Eve? This is serious shit," Libby huffed.

"Well there is something but you won't like it so I'm not gonna say, all I can and want to tell you now and the reason to call you in the first place that I love you so much, you have always been my best friend and the sister that I never had…,"

"What the hell are you gonna do Eve?" Libby snapped, but Eve was silent and Libby didn't like it. "Eve Mary Blake, you better talk or I swear to god you will find me tomorrow morning in your room and the first thing you will get from me is a punch in the face!" she threatened Eve angrily using her full name so she was pissed, she never use full names unless she is so mad.

"I'm…I'm going to, to sacrifice myself to stop Adam!" Eve told her hearing her gasping through the phone. "See that's why I didn't want to tell you, now you gonna freak out and probably I will find you here in a few hours."

"You can't do that Eve," Libby said and she was sobbing now. "You were in a freakin' coma for seven damn years, you can't do that, there must be something else to do, right? Ask your angel maybe he knows something!"

"No one knows what I'm going to do Lib, only you and Castiel, I didn't even tell Dean or Sam not even Arial, I only called you to say good…,"

"No, no good byes!" She cut her off. "You won't do that, right, please don't do that. Look I will call Simon now he must know something, he can help or, or call you family, your uncles, I bet those bastards know something, just don't kill yourself Eve, please, please don't do that, please," Libby pleaded sobbing hysterically so was Eve she heard her like that.

"I'm sorry, I'm really sorry, I don't want to die Libby, I don't, but I have to do this, so far it's the only way, I have to!" Eve said still crying but Libby was silent. "Libby, you still here?" she asked.

"Yes, and I'm trying to call Simon, he will convince you not to do this, he always did, yeah I'm your best friend and practically your sister but he was always the convincing one and I know he will stop you from doing this!" she said.

"Sweetie, an angel couldn't convince me to stop, you think Simon will?" Eve said. "He is my best friend, but he just can't help with this, okay! And when you see him tell him that he always been a good friend," Eve paused hearing Libby's sobs and it was tearing Eve's heart, she barley managed to talk. "Please don't make it harder on me Libby, please. I really wanted to see you and my family, I was stupid not to come and see you after I woke up but I can't change it now, I have to go now, I'm sorry, I love you!" she said nearly breaking down sobbing; it was hard, so hard.

"I love you too sister, I really wish that there was something I can do, but…," Libby said, but she couldn't finish chocking with her tears not able to talk.

"I know, I know." Eve said and hung up the phone.

After the call Eve again laid on her bed crying, good byes weren't the best thing to do, telling her friends and family that she was going to die wasn't that fun. And she knew that when Dean and Sam get back she would go through all that again, not to mention Arial, and Bobby, and all this wasn't going to be good, at all.

...

I'll miss the winter

A world of fragile things

Look for me in the white forest

Hiding in a hollow tree, come find me

I know you hear me

I can taste it in your tears

...

Eve was now asleep, but what she thought it would help her to get rest made her feel worse. Her sleep was full of nightmares, she saw herself still in the town surrounded with animals but this time the animals attacked her and even with her running like hell, they caught her and started to attack, dozens of them, but then she saw Sam and Dean and she called them for help, they ran towards her getting the animals off her, but when they approached they started to turn into animals themselves and attacked her instead. On that Eve snapped shooting up in her bed.

Eve sat on her bed panting after that horrible dream finding out that she was crying too while she was asleep.

"A bad dream?" Arial said from across the room making Eve literally jump.

"FUCK!" She snapped, "I told you not to do that a million times now, what part of don't watch me sleep and knock on my door before getting in don'tyouunderstand you thick head?" Eve barked.

"I like watching you while you're asleep!" he said standing up from his chair.

"Its creepy and you're not allowed to get in my room without asking!" Eve told him, annoyed.

"No, I'm your guardian angel I'm allowed to do a lot of things!" Arial told Eve sitting next to her on her bed.

"Where are Dean and Sam?" Eve asked.

"On their way home, they will be here in a few!" Arial answered her. "And yes Castiel told me about what you want to do!" he said and Eve knew he read her mind.

"I also said no mind reading Arial, what? Are you retarded or something?" she said trying to pick a fight, to avoid talking about that subject.

"You know there are other choices…," he started but Eve cut him off.

"Yeah the ones you don't want to tell me about, right?" she said. "I don't have a death wish, I want to live but you don't give me any other choice, not you, not Cas!"

Arial got closer to her reaching for her hand to hold it. "We didn't tell because we can't tell!" he said, Eve gave him "yeah right!" look. "And I'm telling you, you can't do this, okay, you are not going to kill yourself!" he said in a firm tone.

"Arial, you have nothing to do with this! This is my life and I'm the one who has a full control over it, not you, end of the story!" Eve said taking her hand from his hands.

Arial kept looking at her for few minutes and in one unexpected move he closed the gap between them pressing a kiss to Eve's lips, and for his surprise he felt her kissing back. Arial leaned closer to Eve and he deepened the kiss pinning her under him, but Eve broke the kiss panting.

"I need to breathe remember!" she said gasping for air. "Okay, you got your kiss, now leave, I just did that 'cause I'm gonna die, so…,"

"No you're not! And was that the only reason you kissed me back?" Arial exclaimed; Eve nodded looking away. A moment of silence passed till Arial leaned down again to kiss Eve but this time she stopped him.

"You can't do that again!" she told him pushing him gently so she could sit.

Arial didn't push and he sat straight next to Eve. "Eve," he called catching her attention as she was looking in the other direction avoiding his glares. "You can't do what you want to do!"

"Well try to stop me!" she teased. Arial harshly grabbed her arm looking angry but when she turned to look at him he saw the look in her eyes making him loosing his grip, he didn't intend that it would be that firm but it ended like that.

"I…I'm…I," Arial was stuttering trying to say something but he couldn't. "I lov…," he started but Eve's hand on his mouth cut him off.

"No, no." She said her eyes widened. "You can't say that, you won't last another minute if they knew," she paused. "I know, a while ago too, but there is no chance at all, you know that, you are an angel!" she told him slowly word by word emphasizing her last sentence. "Plus, you read minds and you know how I feel, and to whom my heart belongs. Arial, your feelings can be used against us, no one and I mean no one should know about this, you don't like me and we never kissed and none of this ever happened!"

"But I do!" Arial told her. "I never thought that would ever happen, do you have any idea how many people I been with as their guardian angel? A LOT! But you, with you its different. I think an angel with feelings is not such a great idea after all, why no one thought that might happen?"

"Dude,you're freaking out!" Eve said reaching to hold his hands. "And you're the one who's suppose to calm me down!" she snorted trying to hold her laughs making Arial glare at her. "Sorry, but this is so messed up!"

"I know," Arial huffed. "Still, you can't kill yourself!"

"Look, and to end this once and for all. I'm doing this, and you need to get over your feelings because you don't want to get killed either, if I saw it others can!" Eve told him. "And now you need to go!"

"But you…," Arial was about to protest but he was interrupted.

Dean burst into the room suddenly without knocking on the door and he looked pissed as hell, and seeing Arial with Eve in her room on her bed wasn't something Dean wanted to really see.

"Arial, leave now!" Eve said getting out of bed.

"No, let him stay 'cause you might need someone to save your ass!" Dean growled angrily. But Eve nodded at Arial and he vanished.

"Dean, I …," Eve started but she was cut off.

"No, no," Dean said getting closer to her. "You are a hard ass I know that, you lie, you're crazy and you do lots of weird stuff, I get that but what you did was the worst, knocking me unconscious and leaving to meet that thing that wants you dead more than anyone else, and ALONE!" Dean yelled at her. "That was stupid!"

"I know!" Eve yelled back. "But I had nothing else to do, he was going to kill all of us, not only me, you and Sam too, I had to!"

"What was Arial doing here?" Dean asked, Eve looked confused at him.

"What's that have to do with anything?" she asked in confusion. "He is my guardian angel; he can be with me you know!"

"No, he can't!" Dean snapped. "Was the things that Cas told us true? I will kill you with my bare hands if it's true!"

"Well, I'd love to see you do that; just make sure it won't hurt much!" Eve said sitting on her bed, she was silent for a minute then she started to shake, she started to cry.

"So, it's true!" Dean muttered to himself, and then he went to sit next to her on the bed. "Eve, you can't do this, not now, not after all this," Dean paused. "Not after I found you!" he said making Eve look at him tears still pouring silently from her eyes.

Eve's mind now was on fire, she wanted to talk but at the same time she was afraid, she wanted to tell Dean what she really felt towards him, now more than ever, but she was going to die and hearing what he just said. She didn't know what to do; she kept looking at him speechless. Dean leaned closer to her pressing a kiss to her lips, passionate kiss, Eve was crying now even harder knowing that this kiss might be the last kiss she would share with Dean, that made the kiss special, more passionate and that made Eve enjoy every second of it, enjoying every touch, taste and breath.

"I love you!" Eve gasped breaking the kiss. "Dean, I love you." She said making Dean to look at her surprisingly. "I'm sorry but I couldn't help but saying it, I'm sor…," Eve was going to apologize but she was cut off by Dean.

"I love you too!" he told her.

"What? Really?" Eve exclaimed. "Dean, don't say it because I did or just to make me happy cause I'm going to die!"

"No, I'm not doing any of this. I…love…you Eve!" Dean said again.

Eve now had so much emotions, she was happy for hearing Dean telling her that he loves her but at the same time she was sad and guilty for the fact that she was going to leave him and die. What she didn't think of and just did it was kissing him. Eve cupped Dean's face with both of her hands telling him she loves him one more time before brushing her lips against his and both of them were locked in their first official kiss after expressing their true feelings.

Eve broke the kiss giving Dean a smile and she reached for his shirt taking it off, Dean wasn't sure what she was doing letting her take the shirt off, then Eve reached for the hem of his T-shirt too, but this time he put his hands in her hands stopping her. "Dean, we don't have much time, I'm going to die and maybe tomorrow is the day, please!" she said and pressed a kiss to his lips, Eve felt something different in this kiss and when she pulled away she knew what, the taste of Dean's tears was the thing that made the kiss different. She looked at him and softly brushed those tears shaking her head no leaning again to give him another kiss. And once again she reached for his T-shirt and he let her help him to take it off. With Eve now underneath him Dean started to kiss her harder with all the passion he has for her while Eve was holding on him tight pressing him closer to her for the fact that she wont touch him again, that might be their first and last time ever, but she wasn't crying anymore she accepted the fact that that was all what she was going to have, and having Dean's love was enough for her.

Dean pulled back from their passionate kiss looking at Eve in the eye waiting for her permission and he saw it in her eye. Dean reached for her PJ's top to take it off and…

"Eve we…," Castiel appeared suddenly in the room making both Eve and Dean snap. "I'm sorry!" Castiel said looking away.

Seeing Castiel was bad for Eve now more than ever but not for interrupting, it was for the fact that he must have arrived to take her away for ever.

"Cas, tell me it's not the time to go! Please!" Eve pleaded.

"No, actually I'm here to tell you something much better!" Castiel informed. "But can we talk downstairs?" he said in a tone closer to an order than asking.

"Okay, just go and we will be with you in a sec!" Dean said getting off of Eve. Castiel left but this time he used the door. Dean reached for her T-shirt and then he looked at Eve who looked pale. "What's wrong?" he asked in concern, getting out of bed.

"I don't know!" Eve said with a dazed look on her face. Getting out of the bed, "Let's hear what Cas has to say!" she said and Dean nodded taking her hand walking with her down stairs.

...

Holding my last breath

Safe inside myself

Are all my thoughts of you

Sweet ruptured light it ends here tonight

...

*The lyrics are from the song My Last Breath by Evanescence.(Not in order)

Hope you liked this chapter, and PLEASE *begging now on my knees, Please Review!