Chapter 52j: Powerlessness
Whatever that little twat said to her, I'm going to give him hell over it!
Poing! Clap!
I am going to strip him naked and drag him by his feet through his school to embarass the everliving ego out of that puny self-absorbed male monkey brain of his.
Poing! Clap!
HOW DARE HE DO THIS TO MY SETTY!
Poing! Clap!
We're sitting opposite eachother in the waiting room of the judge's office. His secretary is sitting over there on the other side of the room behind her desk, but I guess she's seen enough panicked kids in Setty's position to know when to bug us and when to stay away.
Poing! Clap!
Mom and dad and her dad and the parade of hired help are currently in the courtroom to discuss a few things. The judge decided Setty couldn't come in because of all the pressure it might place on her... well, I don't blame him. She's a mess as it is.
Poing! CRACK!
Oh, oops! The panic on Setsuka's face and the embarassment on my own meet for a moment before we look towards the secretary in panicked shame.
The woman seems frustrated. I'd be too if I were to have to clean up a broken case and a big puddle of water. I quickly move to stand up and come to offer an apology to the woman who is getting a cleaning cloth from a cabinet near her.
"I'm so sorry. We weren't paying attention. So sorry!"
She offers a troubled smile, shaking her head before bouncing the ball back to Setty moments after picking it up. Wow, the lady must be a masochist if she's not telling us to stop.
"Don't mention it. It's happened before."
Somehow, I doubt it, but why complain when you are getting away scot-free? I'm not that stupid. I offer her a small smile before returning back to Setty, motioning her to bounce the ball back towards me.. but she seems to be lost in her own mind again.
We've spent the past ten minutes bouncing this ball back and forth, because Setty won't talk and I don't want to leave her stuck in that hyperactive little mind of hers right now.
It is a very bad place, I can tell that much.
A month ago, I'd have thought Cain would be sitting here with her.
But that little prick offended her badly enough that she didn't want him to come. His hurt expression was as intense as it was deserved. The stupid little asshole put his head into it far too much, so he shouldn't be surprised it can tear, too!
I clack my tongue, and finally get Setty's attention back on me. She forces a smile on her lips that couldn't be more fake, and throws the ball again.
Poing! Clap!
As I catch the ball, I hold onto it. Should I ask her? I don't want to pry too much.
Hell. I feel guilty. Can I tell her to come live with me? Do I tell her to give live with Cain? She's welcome in either house no matter what she wants, and she knows that.
In actuality, it comes down to whether I want to be selfish, or whether I want to be supportive?
"Setty. Do you know what you're going to say?"
She gives me a lost look. So this is what it looks like to pull away the pillar that supports all that boundless optimism. So cruel.
In the end, she shakes her head slightly before tears slip into her eyes again.
I thought as much. Sigh. This should have been an easy 'Nii-san this, Nii-san that' sort of talk. That little bastard~!
Unable to help myself, I encroach on her little island of suffering and force a hug upon her. She's not in the mood for this sort of physical skinship, but I frankly don't care. She doesn't know what she wants; that's the problem to begin with.
And just maybe, she'll keep living with us if I am really supportive right now.
BAH! I hate myself for thinking like this! She needs me, why am I betraying her by trying to become a part of the problem that's bothering her? Whatever she decides, I am fine with it. That's what I decided this morning. Period!
Her fingers grip my arms, and she sniffles and cries in the most heartrending fashion. She won't let me see, but the shaking of her body and the irregular breathing makes it as clear as day. I can only pat her back, finding that the words I wanted to offer are slowly escaping me because they seem more selfish by the moment.
I am her sister, not her owner! Decision. Made. No more second-guessing! No matter how much I will regret it!
"Setty..."
The saliva I am trying to swallow is somehow fighting my body and gravity both, but eventually it slips down, allowing me to form more words without drooling over her shoulder.
"You should trust in yourself. Is one little fight with that little twerp enough to destroy that life-long bond you two have?"
There. I'm supporting her. Like a good sister.
Wait wait, why is she crying even harder now? She's gripping onto my arms for dear life like a drowning man in a storm!
What did I do? How do I fix this?!
It is then that I see the judge come through the little door that leads to the courtroom. He gives a very sympathetic glance in our direction before talking to the woman that is still cleaning up the mess our bouncing game cauised.
I guess he's going to let her calm down before whisking her away to his office for that chat.
Doesn't he realize the painful feelings will just rear their ugly heads once more?
Despite that... I can't blame the man one bit for wanting to take her pain away. Because I feel the exact same. She shouldn't have to do this!
I just hope he won't make her cry as pathetically as I just did.