"You promised you wouldn't do it anymore; I'm holding you to that even after we're grannies." Niko said gruffly with one finger thrust on Nozomi's chest and a hand on her hip.
Nozomi looked passively down her nose a short distance to Niko's squinting face. The air fell thick to bend her nerve as they stood unwilling to back away. Her eyes fell to her shoes and her shoulders sagged. The passivity she traded hesitantly for acceptance. Niko crossed her arms, waiting with the stiffness of a sentinel and hawkish eyes.
"I promise I won't touch anyone's chest."
"Without…"
"Without their permission anymore."
Finally Niko nodded, her body relaxed as she sat on the edge of a desk. She closed her eyes and breathed deeply; Nozomi watched her steely resolve deflate. Suddenly she appeared diminished, waif-like, tired. It made Nozomi's stomach drop. Her eyes still refused to meet Niko in shame. They sat again in an uneasy silence that itself was poised hungrily for another word. She looked at her hands. How many times had Niko dreaded the sight of them? How hollow had she felt long after they'd left, leaving a tingle of disgust that spread like a virus down to her bones, to her spirit?
The thoughts swam in her mind, contaminating it with an unease that left her skin crawling. A sour taste filled her mouth and made her face crinkle. Memories took their turn stabbing her one by one. She was alone under the dim lights of her parent's empty apartment, she was stuffing her things into boxes that grew fewer each year, she couldn't remember her parents faces locked behind TV static. She was empty, alone, an object shuffled into the biggest box by her parents hands, by their lack of touch. She swallowed the burning urge for tears. It was Niko's level headed voice that shoved her out of the trance. She shivered to sense the embers of frustration beneath it.
"I know it's not easy for you to change; I think it's hard for everyone really. I also know you can be a stubborn jackass because you're scared doing too many new things will change your image, then people won't like you. But this isn't negotiable. Neither of us are perfect, but there are things that aren't funny even if you do it jokingly. This is one of those."
"Nikkochi I…I'm sorry. I don't have much else to say; I don't know what I can say at all."
Niko sighed and shook her head. Nozomi curled into herself like a child anticipating a blow.
"Don't tell me you're sorry, tell me you understand."
"After today, and just now, I think I do. I can."
"Do you really? Really really? You know I hate hearing only the things I want to hear."
"…Yes."
"Are you truly serious?"
"Yes."
"I can't hear you loud enough." Niko said holding a hand to her ear and leaning forward.
"Yes! I belittled you and made you feel like trash, like…like a thing. I'm so sorry, so sorry you'll think I'm a broken record. But it's true, it's one of the only things that's clear now."
Niko's bravado shattered quietly. She frowned at the forcefulness in her words that still rang between them. After a pause she met Nozomi's wounded eyes searching her for an emotion. For anger, she realized. She smiled, reassuring in the way of a mother.
"So you understand after all."
A/N: I really wish Nozomi was held accountable for whenever she does something wrong because her groping people isn't cute, there is no cross cultural/gender excuse for sexual assault. If she ever had to apologize and really think about her actions I think it would've made her more mature.