A/N: Guess whose back? I uploaded some new stories by the way. They may not be as good as this one, but I felt like I needed to expand a bit. Let's get back to letting Riley annoy the heck out of people, shall we?

Many thanks to...

Imamc— (Aww! I was afraid people would run for the hills instead of sticking with the story after I tortured poor Éomer!)

LilactheDryad— (Ha! My favorite too! I get a lot more of the inside jokes on that episode now that I've watched the LOTR trilogy. Drat. And now that you've taken up karaoke, I really want that cheeseburger!)

Izzy bug— (Admit it! He TOTALLY had it coming! ;)

Amy— (Here's your mooooorrrrrreeeee!)

I would have updated sooner but life got in my way!

—This heartfelt quote has been brought to you by a-frazzled-author-who-honestly-had-absolutely-no motivation-or-inspiration-to-find-a-good-quote-today

Gandalf let out an piercing whistle as we exited the forest.

"Gah! My ears are bleeding!', I wailed.

"As are Éomer's.', Legolas jested. The men guffawed while Gandalf simply ignored us and whistled again.

A loud whinny sounded across the plains as a white horse came thundering across the fields.

"That is a Mearas, lest my eyes are cheated by some spell.', Legolas murmured.

"I think it's a pegasus.', I remarked.

"What is that?', Boromir asked innocently.

"A unicorn."

"And what is a unicorn?"

"A horse with a horn sticking out of its head that eats rainbows and poops butterflies."

Shadowfax, who had apparently heard my comment, shook an accusing hoof at me. My mouth dropped open while Gandalf let out a chuckle.

"Shadowfax. He is the Lord of all horses, and has been my friend through many grave dangers. He is more intelligent than you think, Riley."

Shadowfax nickered to something behind me and I suddenly found myself eating dirt.

"Hasufel, you traitor!', I grouched as I rolled over and pulled myself up. That stupid horse had actually listened to the 'Lord of all horses' and knocked me onto the ground! Shadowfax made a noise that could only be considered as a laugh. I scowled before rolling my eyes and lifting my hands in defeat.

"Okay, okay! I'm sorry I said you look like you eat rainbows and poop butterflies!"

Shadowfax shook his head and neighed in triumph.

"Stupid horse!', I muttered as I brushed myself off and clambered back onto Hasufel with Strider's help. Aragorn's chest was rumbling in amusement as we spurred our horses on.

Laugh it up, why don't you?

Remember when Éomer thought that all elves were wise (I honestly think that was a veiled insult to imply that I am stupid) and serious? Well, he also thought that all elves are natural horsemen. Ha! Fat chance! The only riding instruction I've ever had is when Elrohir took it upon himself to give me a good reason to hate him.

So basically when I had to ride across Rohan with Éomer I had to rely on a good sense of balance and observing what the other riders were doing. Hasufel was very good about following the herd, so steering wasn't really a problem. The true issue lay with stiff muscles. And after riding for three days with almost no rest stops, I'm stiff enough to be a piece of starched cardboard.

Currently, I have fallen asleep leaning against the back of Arwen's boyfriend.

"Stop drooling, Rielásse. We're almost there."

I jerk awake and stare in horror at Aragorn's back-turned-pillow: a quarter-size spot of slobber darkens his elvish cloak. My cheeks heat in embarrassment as I try to wipe it off. To his credit, the ranger was very good natured about it, meaning of course, that he incessantly teased me about it.

Strider slowly reined Hasufel in as Gandalf stopped Shadowfax a few paces ahead of us.

"Edoras and the Golden Hall of Meduseld. There dwells Théoden, King of Rohan, whose mind is overthrown."

"By what devilry has this come to be?"

The wizard turned to look at Boromir.

"By Saruman. His hold over Théoden is now very strong. Come, we must continue." Gandalf gently pressed his heels into Shadowfax's sides and we were off again.

As I focused my eyes on the Golden Hall I spied a lone figure whose white dress billowed in the wind. Her golden hair was almost waist length as it drifted gently in the breeze behind her.

Éowyn. Sister of Éomer and sister-daughter of Théoden King.

Several mounds appeared and Gandalf stopped Shadowfax once more.

"Evermind, those small flowers are called. Or simbelmynë in this land. Their white blooms are seen in all seasons, and they cover the barrows of Théoden's sires. These mounds are the tombs of Rohan's kings."

"Oh, the irony!', I remarked dramatically as I realized what plant I was looking at. "Back home we call these flowers forget-me-nots."

"Seven mounds on the left and nine on the right. Many years have passed since the Golden Hall was first built."

"Indeed, mellon nin. Five hundred times have the red leaves fallen in Mirkwood since then. And it seems but a little time to us elves.', Legolas remarked as he gazed around.

"I must be the unique exception— I'm probably the only elf that thinks living past one hundred is a miracle.', I muttered under my breath.

Legolas turned a curious eye in my direction.

"Aragorn told us that you somehow knew of the future, but he did not say much else of your past. Exactly how old are you, Rielásse?"

"Eighteen.', I said as nonchalantly as possible. Watching Legolas almost fall off of Arod was worth much more than the effort to keep a straight face.

"B-But that is younger than an adolescent elf!', he spluttered.

"Yup."

"Valar save us! You are not much more than a child in our reckoning!"

"Oh, put a cork in it, Blondie!"

"Gandalf? How is this possible?"

The Istar chuckled at the elf's bewilderment.

"Peace, Legolas. It is a long story for another time. Now we focus on the more pressing matters."

"Does she even know her begetting day, Gandalf?"

"No! Who wants to know when their parents... nevermind. I have a birthday, not a 'begetting day' as you call it."

"Only mortals have such things.', Legolas said confusedly.

"Exactly.', was my short answer. Leaving him guessing was the most fun I've had in days (other than annoying the hairy horsemen).

"Perhaps it would be best for you to put your hood up, Lady Rielásse.', Boromir suggested. He is the only member of our group to still address me by that title. "If Saruman has overthrown the King's mind he will be the one holding the power in Rohan and he may still want you for his selfish purposes."

He had a good point, so I quickly pulled the hood my grandmother had given me over my head.

We reached the gates of the city in time to see the flag of Rohan tear from the pole where it once hung above the doors of Meduseld. I watched as it fluttered close to the ground before the wind caught it once more and blew it over the city walls towards our small company.

The gatekeeper called out to Gandalf in the Rohirric language, so most of what they said went in one of my ears and out the other. It did not matter anyway;my attention was on the flag.

"Aragorn. Help me down.', I whispered.

"What! Why?', he exclaimed quietly. "We are almost into the city. Gandalf is giving our names as we speak."

"I know that! But I can't exactly get down by myself with my shoulder the way it is! I need help!"

"Alright, but whatever you think to accomplish must be done swiftly."

I nodded in agreement as I was helped to the ground. I scurried over to pick up the flag and then quickly returned to Hasufel. Aragorn eyed me curiously before shaking his head and helping me back onto the horse as we entered Edoras.

The horses were passed into the care of the stablehands as we dismounted and made our way to the doors of the King's halls.

"There is more cheer in a graveyard.', Gimli mumbled as he took in his surroundings.

They are in mourning. The people of Rohan have lost their prince, and they fear that their king will follow.

I had not realized that I had voiced my thoughts aloud until Gimli spoke again.

"Aye, lass. And may they forgive my brash words."

The doors were opened and several armed guards swept out of them, led by a man with auburn hair.

"I am Háma, Doorward of Théoden. I cannot allow you before Théoden King so armed, Gandalf Greyhame. By order of—', the man crinkled his nose in disgust as he all but spat the name. "—Grima Wormtongue."

Boromir was the first to hand over his weapons, and with much less hesitancy Gandalf handed over Glamdring.

I sighed as I held out my own weapons for Háma to take. He caught a glimpse of my face underneath my hood and I heard a sharp intake of breath.

"You're a woman!"

"Yes, and you're supposed to be taking my weapons. Unless I get to keep them?', I quipped sarcastically.

"A woman's place is in the household.', he said under his breath.

I'm guessing women don't have the right to vote yet?

Before I can go into a tirade about women's suffrage Glandúr was taken out of my grasp and laid against the stone wall. My twin knives followed, and my bow and quiver also. Legolas eyed Háma as the man plopped my weapons onto the ground with little care as to how he handled them.

When the time came for Legolas to give up his own possessions, he fixed Háma with a deadly glare.

"Handle this bow with care, along with my other weapons. It is from the Golden Woods and was a gift from the Lady of Lórien."

The Doorward's eyes widened with wonder. Seeing at how it unnerved the guard to be holding something that had been made by the elves, Legolas cooly added something to his statements that made poor Háma go pale.

"And it is not wise to treat her granddaughter with such flippant disrespect."

Ha! Eat that carrot-head!

The man gulped before moving on to Aragorn.

"It is not my wish to deliver Andúril over to any other man."

"Aragorn, just hand the man the sword. We must speak with Théoden.', Gandalf sternly reminded him.

"Very well. But see that no man touches the weapon, for if any but the heir of Elendil were to draw the sword death would come to them." Aragorn's voice was cold as he slowly unbuckled his belt and laid his sword against the wall with the other weapons.

"Ah! If it has Andúril to keep it company then my axe will lay here unashamed.', Gimli said as he offered up his weapons. Which, I might mention, took forever for him to do. How on earth Gimli toted ten axes around is beyond me!

"There now! Everything is in order! Let us see your master, if you please Háma."

Háma gave Gandalf a look that stated he clearly saw through the wizard's little game.

"Your staff."

"Foolishness!', the wizard cried. "Prudence is one thing, but discourtesy another. I am old. If I may not lean on my walking stick than I will sit outside on the steps until it pleases Théoden to hobble out here and speak with me himself!"

Yeesh. And they think I act like a preschooler!

Aragorn laughed at his old friend's antics.

"It seems that your staff is just as precious to you as my blade! Every man has something he does not with to part with." The ranger turned his gaze to Háma. "You would not part an old man from his walking stick?"

I could almost hear Háma mentally rolling his eyes as he ordered the doors to be opened. Gandalf gave Aragorn a sly wink before following the guard.

Okay then. That part is over! Now let's go give Théoden a facelift!