I can still feel the lingering warmth – of his breath, his embrace, his whisper – and every time the thought resurfaces, I can feel myself growing shy and Wendy always watches how my face turns red each time, like an autumn leaf she says.

Wendy says I have grown quieter these days. Wendy says I have grown spacey lately. Wendy says I have the look of a maiden in love. A beautiful and blissful maiden in love.

Am I?

A Tale from Thelua

[27] ebb

Lucy placed her hands atop each other on her lap, taking in a good amount of solace that the place offered. A gentle wind was blowing through the entranceway of the Crystal Palace. It carried the subtle scent of camellia, grass, and just a little bit, a trace of the sun. She closed her eyes then, taking a slow, deep breath before letting it go as gentle. Her eyes fluttered open and in front of her were the empty seats that used to be filled by her guests.

The tea party had finished a while ago and the ladies had all left the venue along with their attendant. Millie, Ange, and Agne had returned first in Lucy's request, while Wendy had left midway the party as she had to attend her class. Now, alone, Lucy could finally feel all of her senses returning.

Hosting a party was not an easy job, but she managed to accomplish her hidden objectives aside from networking and securing her standing. One; she gathered that no rumor or something of the sort about her or Natsu was circulating among the talk of the ladies. And two; the topic of the latest trend in fashion and the discussion of Lady Levy's upcoming new romance story was popular among the ladies.

She had her wariness on the non-existent talk of the rumor. The ladies could be keeping the rumor about her and their beloved Flower Knight away from her. After all, it was spreading like a wildfire that even Wendy heard of it. It had just been almost two weeks since it first arose and a rumor that was bordering scandalous should not be able to die easily.

She only hoped that it would not change the nobility's view on Natsu.

Or was it possible that the ladies had changed their mind after they witnessed what Natsu had done earlier?

Such thought instantly made her reminded to what he exactly did to her. The hushed gasp that came from her guests did not help the redness of her face, and neither did the small smirk he offered her after placing a kiss on the back of her hand. Wordlessly, Lucy's hand raised and touched the camellia tucked on her hair. A small smile appeared on her face.

That was rather unexpected…

The sound of high heels hitting the marble floor made Lucy direct her gaze to the entranceway. Someone entered the building. White silvery hair with eyes of the clear blue sky, a woman whose dress fluttered in the wind as if she brought them with her as she stepped in. There was a slight surprise that passed on her face upon noticing Lucy before it quickly faded away as she curtsied.

"Greetings, Your Highness," she said quietly, almost solemnly.

"Lady Beumann," Lucy acknowledged her, silently noticing that this was only the second time she talked in her presence.

"My apology for coming unannounced," she said. "I am afraid that I have left my belonging here."

Lucy's eyes swept across the empty seats and tables, wondering if there was something left behind. "What is it?" She asked.

"A blue bonnet hat," she replied. A polite smile was flashed at Lucy after a brief pause and she continued. "It was blown by the wind earlier and stuck at one of the tall trees. An embarrassing story, indeed, as it made me arrive late to the gathering. However, His Highness has kindly promised to get it for me after the tea party ends."

Lucy inclined her head slightly to the side.

For one who spoke no words at all during the gathering, she was surely being rather talkative right now.

"Please have a seat, Lady Beumann." Lucy gestured to the empty seat across her.

Her gem-like eyes gleamed as if it were elucidation of what she was feeling behind the polite smile that stayed on her petite face. The duchess nodded wordlessly and made her way to the empty seat while Lucy tore her gaze away and it landed on the clear, blue sky. Blue, just like her eyes. Blue, she thought, was Natsu's favorite color.

"I was told that you are acquainted with Sir Gray," Lucy said, suddenly reminded of the knight's story.

The duchess nodded. "I first met him during my childhood, Your Highness."

"A childhood friend?"

"No, not really." Her smile faltered a bit. "However, we did meet often as he had to follow His Highness around as his private-knight-in-training."

Her blue eyes glanced at the entranceway, but they were not looking at anything in its direction. It was as if she was staring past the garden; far, far into what her mind's eye was seeing.

"There was a grass plain somewhere along the direction to the hunting ground with a small land where the wildflowers grow," she said. "We used to go there to play."

Lucy remembered the plain she passed when she went on horseback with Wendy and her nanny. "The wildflowers have disappeared, unfortunately."

"Is that so," she sighed. "Even though it was so beautiful and lustrous. I would love to show it to you, Your Highness, the hidden beauty of the castle ground."

"I should be the one who shows the lady around the castle ground." Lucy smiled. "After all, it is the duty of the princess to please her guest."

Her blue eyes met Lucy's, showing an ineffable swirl of emotion before it disappeared as she let out a small chuckle. "Your Highness is so thoughtful."

The soft noise of wind and rustling leaves filled the silence that followed right after. Another gentle wind made its way to her, making the pink flower tucked on her hair fell into her lap. She looked at it. Her fingers lifted it gently, cradling it in her palm. Camellia. The flower favored by Her Majesty. It meant admiration, affection, love.

And pink camellia meant longing.

She remembered how the man walked to her, eyes never once strayed from her, and gently tucked the flower on her hair. Then, came the compliment, the kiss, and the small smirk. Natsu had been brave, Lucy thought, to display such gesture so affectionate in front of the ladies as if they were nothing. And she was caught so off guard that even the ladies were singing praise about their marriage, saying they were just meant to be.

And she was lucky that it immediately served as an opening topic for the ladies to converse because the one she originally had in mind, surely, could not make the ladies satisfied compared to it. Embarrassing as it was, she thought that it was a good topic for the ladies – for love and romance story was what women always dreamed about.

"It must be nice."

Lucy blinked, then quietly stole a glimpse of the woman whose gaze fixed at the flower in her palm. The duchess' voice was nothing more than a soft murmur; as if they were not meant to be heard.

"Being with him."

Of course. When it all happened, she was there, watching just like the other ladies did. The duchess, whose arrival differed only a couple minutes from her husband's, must have had met him on her way there. She must have had talked to him. And if what had become her assumption was true, the woman across her was keeping her feelings toward him still. Like he used to.

Lisanna is…

"Adored by him." Her smile was gentle yet there was sadness in her whisper. "And loved."

…unfortunate.

"Princess, Duchess Beumann."

A deep baritone voice echoed, and Lucy could feel her breath hitched at the familiarity of it. There, on the entranceway of the Crystal Palace, was a man whose lips shut tight impassively, whose dark eyes stared straight at her. In his hand was a blue bonnet hat which made quite the contrast to his dark attire.

"Your Highness," the woman across her stood and curtsied. "Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Be at ease, Duchess. I am here to give a message for the princess," he said, "from my brother."

It was weird, to say the least, because Natsu knew about her avoidance of his older brother. He would not ask him to give his message as he would rather visit her himself.

Why lie?

Lucy fought the discomfort that threatened to show on her face. A shudder ran through her body and she forced herself to smile. "What is it?" she asked.

"He said to meet him at the parlor after the gathering finished."

There was a hint of a smile when he finished talking and his eyes pronounced something akin to happiness – as if he were relieved on seeing her, on talking to her. Although she felt unsure about the gravity of what he said, she thought she could grasp this chance to return first. To be away from him.

"I'm sorry for troubling you, Your Highness, and thank you for letting me know," she said. Standing up, Lucy glanced at the duchess who had been watching their brief exchange in silence. "It was a pleasure talking with you, Lady Beumann. I'm sorry that I can't see you off. Please take care on your way back."

As Lucy walked past the man, she could feel the barest brush of his finger on the back of her right hand. Her breath once again hitched. It was just for a fleeting moment; it was just the slightest touch of his finger. But–

Smile. She had to smile.

Turning around, Lucy curtsied and although her head started to thump loudly, she smiled. "Good day, Your Highness."

And only when she was inside the castle, after making a couple turn to the direction of Natsu's study, then she could try and calm her erratic breath. To think that she would be so breathless after such a short encounter, it must have had troubled her quite a lot, even if she tried not to think too deep into it. Adding the busy activities that she had since days ago, planning and preparing for the tea party, into the equation, it seemed like it started to take a toll on her body.

Her head thumped painfully, and it would be an understatement if she said her body felt sluggish. More than that, she started to feel as if her body was dragged down forcefully. Lucy quickly thought of going to the parlor, reminding herself that Natsu was waiting for her there, yet somehow, she found herself staggering towards his study instead.

So… dizzy…

She felt feeble, unable to even made a knock on the door. Placing her hand on the cold metal knob, Lucy tried to straighten herself. She took a deep breath to soothe the headache and her labored breath and opened the door. The scent of paper and ink that usually welcoming her was absent. What usually came after the unique scent of the room, her husband's question of what she was doing there, was absent. No one was sitting behind the desk filled with stacks of papers. She looked around, silently wondering as to why her vision started to cloud over.

"My lady?"

Lucy knew that voice.

"My lady," the voice paused. There was a dull thud followed by the barest sound of his footsteps approaching her. "My lady, are you all right?"

Where is Natsu?

Just as she thought of that, something tangy filled the back of her throat. Blinking the haziness away to no avail, Lucy brought her hand over her mouth, feeling something was trickling down her mouth and into her jaw. Her vision had darkened.

"My lady!"

What she last remembered was seeing some things through the darkness of her vision; the red thick liquid that splattered all over her hand and Gray's muted shout.

Father, am I…

thank you for reading!

...i need beta reader, really