(For disclaimer, etc. - see chapter 1)

Chapter 22

Day followed night. It was how it worked throughout the 'verse. Even aboard a vessel, there were cycles of time. Light and dark, awake and sleep. Had to be so or a person couldn't function like a person for long. These last few nights, had gotten so as Kaylee would rather day never come at all. She lay with Simon in his bed that first time and wasn't willing then to lie alone no more. He moved into her bunk like the most natural thing in the world and that was that. The nights were all she wanted, since the days brought on a kind of truth she'd rather not face.

River and Jayne patched things up, but nothin' was settled nor the same. Couldn't be now, nor never until Simon's experiments on River's head were done. Jayne weren't happy about it but he sure as anything wasn't letting his bao-bei go flippin' out without him there to help. Took a while for him to heal after the run in with Niska. More than a week or two of long hard days when nobody said nothin' to the Captain of the plans they had, for fear he wouldn't understand. Certainly Simon said they could not trigger River aboard ship as there was no telling the trouble it might cause. They must go elsewhere and so a plan was formed.

Come the first day that Jayne was fit and the ship landed planetside, Kaylee told the Captain they was all headed out on a date.

"You four together?" he checked, eyeing Kaylee and Simon, River and Jayne all with the same suspicious fatherly eye.

River smiled big.

"Captain Daddy trusts them with his precious cargo."

Mal tried not to smirk and failed at keeping the look off his face. She had a habit of putting herself and Kaylee in the place of daughters he didn't have his ownself. Truth to say, Mal barely had the years to be their father if'n he wanted to, but that didn't matter much. He saw them young ladies as girls he had helped to raise in different ways, his to protect from the big bad things in the world if'n he could, and yet just as able to take care of themselves much of the time. He had no worries about them going out into the world with the fellas that loved 'em, that was for gorram sure.

"You folks have your fun whilst you can get it," he advised. "Might be a good while for you get such a chance again."

'Twas the look on Cobb's face that gave away all weren't what it seemed. Mal woulda had him down as the most practiced liar of the four and yet. Still, Captain didn't question his crew. Whatever they was up to, he accepted no harm was gonna come to his boat nor the rest of his crew. Had a notion those four knew what they was doin' even if they was having a plan they felt no need to share yet. Mal had his own dealings to take care of on Lilac. Weren't no need to bother the love birds with them neither.

No idea in his head that those four weren't headed into town for dinner and dancin' or some such. Instead they walked a ways into the desolate safety of the desert and set themselves ready for their experiment. River spoke not a word, nobody did for the longest time, except for mutterings between Simon and Kaylee as they set up the equipment.

Jayne was the quietest of all. River could not even read words from his mind that brought any comfort. Afraid. Rare emotion from her husband, and yet ever present now, and shared in their marriage. Easier to walk away, perhaps, but fears were to be faced, no matter how big and bad.

"Are you ready?"

The look on her face was answer enough, Simon almost felt the need to apologise for the question. Of course she was ready. River was always ready for these moments, since she knew their coming was imminent long before anyone else could guess. Besides, this plan had been in place long enough. Now all that was left was to get on with the experiment and hope for the best possible results whilst preparing for the very worst.

Kaylee stood well back behind Simon as he keyed the code into the computer and beat a hasty retreat from the scene. River's eyes focused on nothing but the screen. She saw the cartoon images begin to move, heard the pointless annoying tune, and then more. Images, sounds, memories not her own dragged from deep inside her mind. They merged and split apart, like atoms she should not see but could not help it. Her head began to spin and then the over-riding need to lash out, to fight. The moment she swung her arm, something caught a hold of the erroneous limb. Jayne's soft strong voice in her ear was calm, sanctuary, serenity.

"'S alright, bao-bei. I got ya," he promised. "You keep a hold of ya mind there, I got the rest of ya."

She knew he must fight to hold her. The River raged and fought, but she pushed back against the tidal wave. Think, think harder than ever before. Concentrate through the fog, the overwhelming need to fight and maim.

Miranda. Miranda had a face of rock and plant, of concrete pillars and glass fronts. A place, not a person. She was blue and green. Inviting and new. Then man came to claim her, change her, mutilate.

There was a sound like screaming, a terrifying, blood-curdling cry. She made that noise, the sound Miranda had made when the end came. Red and black and so much pain. So much. Too much.

Out of the howling agony came silence and nothing. Nothing but numb and cold, so cold.

"River-girl?"

"Mei mei?"

"You in there, honey?

The voices all muddled, but the sentiment was one and the same. There was sand under her nails and ringing in her head, but River was safe. She knew it. She knew those who loved and cared were here to hold her, to comfort, to protect. Safety in their number, in family made, not born in blood.

Blood. The word and image it conjured danced behind her eyes and River pushed it back.

"Too much," she muttered. "Too many."

"Hey ease up there, doc," Jayne advised, misreading her words, thinking they were crowding her.

River didn't argue. The space to breathe was not unpleasant. Turning her face to the sun, she took in air and felt better, easier. The worst had passed, and yet was still to come in other ways. A few moments more and she must explain, must tell all as best she could. The point of their mission, after all.

"Location," she said at last, letting her slight weight sag in Jayne's arms still as he held on tight. "Planet in orbit. Miranda."

"Miranda isn't a person?" Simon checked. "It's a place?"

"As she saw, she says." River nodded. "Something there. Many things. Good at first but then bad. Parts she cannot see."

Jayne watched his bao bei with both interest and still a little fear. Watching her lose it all over again weren't any kind of fun, but like River and Simon both told him, had to be done. Holdin' onto her, tellin' her she was safe, seemed to help this time. Weren't no easy mission, keepin' her in check when she raged liked that, but Jayne knew enough, loved her enough to know how to do it. Mebbe he weren't so useless after all.

"The only one who could anchor," she told him, finding a shaky smile, pushing her forehead against his own as they sat in the dirt, uncaring for the state of themselves. "Needs an anchor or fears she would float away."

"I'm here for ya, bao bei," he promised, holding her close. "Ain't no fear o' me bein' anywhere but where you is."

Her smile grew at those words, and then she kissed him. Simon turned away, muttering that perhaps they should get back to the ship. He and Kaylee gathered up the computer and such, ready to make their way home, until eventually River and Jayne got up to follow, their arms around each other as they walked.

"So, this planet named Miranda," said Jayne then. "Where is that?"

"I have no idea," Simon confessed. "I shall have to look into it, study maps, consult the Cortex. Certainly I've never heard of such a place."

He looked to River for more information but none came. He wondered if that was because she had no more to give or just chose to keep it to herself for now. It was impossible to tell, and after all they put her through today, Simon would push for no more.

"She is grateful," his mei mei told him then, as if she read his thoughts, and perhaps that was exactly what she had done. "Had to be done. Necessary pain. She is sorry there is not more to say."

She watched Simon nod his head and knew they understood each other, just as brother and sister always had, even in the worst of times. Their hands found each other for a brief moment and then the two couples continued on as if nothing had happened. Aboard Serenity they would speak of time spent in joy together. Nobody else needed to know about Miranda until they knew more themselves.

Simon found nothing. He searched and searched for Miranda on maps and the Cortex but came up blank time after time. Eventually, he found one tiny reference to a blackrock, a world where terraforming was tried but failed. What such a place had to do with River and her odd turns of behaviour, he could not fathom. To his surprise, it was Kaylee that held the answer.

"Some years back now, before the war. There was call for workers to settle on Miranda, my daddy talked about going. I should've recalled..."

"And yet there's no information. Nothing but this," said Simon, shaking his head and showing her the one map he found with the planet marked on it.

They went in search of River and Jayne then, telling them the small amount of information they now had. The two looked at the map and heard all Kaylee had to tell.

"This place is a whole long way out on the edge of ass knows where," said Jayne, looking to River. "Far as I reckon?"

"Monsters," she said, ice in her voice that caused a shudder in each of them.

She meant Reavers, Simon knew. This was getting worse by the moment.

"We ain't... I mean, that ain't a place nobody should go to, right?" said Kaylee, shaking all over at the very thought.

Nobody gave her an answer, nobody knew what to say for the best. If they never went to Miranda they might never figure out what was going on with River, but such a place could never be safe nor sensible to go near. They all wondered on how to proceed, deciding in each of their own minds that nothing was ever gonna be resolved until they talked of what they found to the Captain. When he called everyone to order at the dinner table, seemed like the right sort of time for an explanation and yet there was no chance for such a thing that night.

"Not sure who this contact we're picking up from is gonna be, so probably best you three stay aboard," Mal explained of the next day's task. "Keep your heads down 'til I know who we're dealing with, dong ma?"

"We understand," Simon confirmed, nodding his head, "but if I might have a word with you-"

"Not now, son," the Captain told him, rising from the table and wiping his mouth as he did. "Got me plans to make, a route to map. We take this cargo we gotta get it to where it's going before the due date or the coin don't come rollin' in."

"We got it, Cap'n," Jayne assured him. "Got no need to bother ya with nothin' right now."

He smiled too big and Mal just knew there was more to this than he was hearing. For now he chose to trust that whatever these folks had planned, it weren't gonna do no harm to his home, his crew. He left the galley, taking Zoe with him to the bridge where Wash was waiting.

"Jayne, he's the Captain," said Kaylee when they were gone. "We have to tell him-"

"Not now we don't," her grumbled at her, softening some when he recalled she only ever meant well. "Ain't goin' to no planet in the middle of the worst part o' space until Mal's got his own job done. We tell all when this is over."

"She agrees," said River, hand gripping her husband's arm. "Best for all."

They looked to Simon, one and all, and watched him nod.

"I suppose it's for the best," he agreed. "We wait 'til this job is done and then we explain about Miranda."

To Be Continued...