0.2 Gasp

Howard 'Chimney' Han could never have imagined that his life would turn out the way it had. It was a hundred times better than any situation he could have dreamt up when he was younger and struggling to find his way in the world.

Now, as he looked around the back yard of the home he had recently purchased with his girlfriend, he knew that he had no regrets. Or perhaps just one – how he longed to have been able to share so much more of his love with Maddie Buckley. Whilst the past two years had been amazing, every day he spent with her still didn't feel enough.

That was how he found himself standing in the yard, covered in fairy lights as rose petals trailed the ground towards the gazebo he had built with his own two hands (perhaps there was some involvement from Eddie and Bobby whilst Buck watched and mocked them). The table in the centre held more of the rose petals, a candle and Maddie's favourite food inclusive of hot mustard. He felt proud of himself, impressed with all the work that he had put in that was perfected by the moonlit night sky.

It was almost time.

His stomach churned with a mixture of excitement and nervousness, he had always known he would end up here someday. A ring in his pocket and a grin on his face as he waited for the amazing, beautiful woman he still couldn't believe had chosen him. He had ushered her upstairs as soon as she had walked through the door, only telling her that she needed to get all dressed up for their two year anniversary but, beyond that, refusing to give any further information.

He could remember when he had told her for the first time that he loved her. He also remembered it was the time she had let him know that a public proposal was never going to be an option for them. He was more than happy to keep this moment between them – kind of, he had nervously asked for Buck's approval knowing his opinion meant more to Maddie than that of her father. And he had also told Hen because… he told her everything.

Chimney finally moved back into the house as he adjusted his tie, the nerves suddenly overcoming the excitement he felt. Suddenly, he found himself wondering if Maddie would even want to get married again or if she would feel it was too soon. The doubts were starting to creep in despite the fact Buck had smirked and embraced him as he told him he was glad to have a brother who actually deserved his sister. He knew Maddie better than he did, surely Buck would have said something if he thought this wasn't something she would want, right?

There was no time for doubt or questions because as soon as he saw her walk down the stairs in a tight, low cut red dress, he realised even if she said no, he was still the luckiest man in the world. She paused for a moment and raised an eyebrow when she saw him waiting for her but he only held out his hand without a word, his eyes lighting up when she took it.

"Are we going out?" She asked eventually, realising she was being pulled in the direction of the back of the house rather than the front door as she had expected. Howie shrugged, "I thought we could make the most of actually having a garden for once." He tried to keep his tone casual but she knew him too well, it had been barely a few minutes and she already knew he was up to something. The ring was suddenly burning a hole in his pocket – he wasn't sure how much longer he could wait before the question was blurted out, similarly to how he had told her he loved her.

Maddie gasped as he led her into the garden, her eyes widening as she took in the shining lights that had been hung so delicately around their porch and gazebo. "Wow…" It was all she could get out in that moment, it wasn't often she was lost for words but everyday she was reminded how lucky she was that Howie had chosen her to love. His nervous laugh pulled her from her own thoughts, and she looked at him with tears in her eyes and a smile she specially reserved for him. Her hand moved from his to settle on his cheek, "Happy two year anniversary, Howie." She finally managed to get out, her voice soft as her fingers brushed against his soft skin.

There had been a time where she couldn't have imagined feeling safe with the man who was supposed to love her, let alone real, true happiness. In the darkest of those moments, she hadn't even imagined a future but yet, almost three years since she had run for her life, she barely thought of it. Doug and her marriage to him no longer defined her – she defined herself and she had chosen a good life without pain and suffering. She had fallen in love with a good man, who had a wonderful heart and a caring nature she had never experienced before.

Their lips met and both smiled, their bodies pressing together as Maddie gripped onto his broad shoulders and he placed both his hands on her hips. Two years and neither could deny the intensity at which their bodies reacted around each other – neither had truly believed in soulmates before but neither could imagine a more perfect fit than the other. Maddie would openly admit that Howie was the true love of her life and he had never hidden the fact that she meant the world to him.

Once they separated, both gasping for air before Howie dropped to one knee without warning, "I'm sorry, I can't hold this in any longer," He fumbled around for the box that contained the ring he had so carefully selected for her – it was simple and small but engraved with just one word; joy. Her eyes lit up with recognition but she didn't interrupt him, his hand found hers and his grip was tight but it was enough to keep her grounded as she waited for him to continue.

"From the moment I met you, I was in awe, you were and still are the most beautiful person – inside and out – I have ever met. Once I got over the shock you were related to Buck, of course." They both laughed and her fingers grazed over the back of his hand, her heart thumping against her chest when she could feel the way his hand shook. She had been proposed to once and it had been romantic, very public and she had felt loved in that moment but seeing how nervous Howie was right then, she knew this was true love. "Thank you for letting me in, you had no reason to trust me and you gave me a chance to just be myself, it only took a few days before I couldn't imagine my life without you. And I know we've been through hell at times but god, Maddie, there have been so many wonderful moments… I had this massive speech prepared about how I knew when I loved you and when I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you but I can't think straight now."

Maddie still didn't speak, this was his moment and she was going to let him ramble on until he asked the question she already knew the answer to. "I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Madeline Buckley. I want to wake up next to you and fall asleep next to you forever, I want to make love to you everyday…" He paused to smirk and waggle his eyebrows, earning an eye roll from the woman as she moved her other hand to wipe away the tears that had fallen as he spoke. "I want to spend the rest of my life loving you because I never imagined being this happy, I never thought someone would love me for me… will you marry me?" He let go of her hand so he could open the box, only realising then how much he was shaking.

He was just glad he didn't have to wait long for the answer, it came without hesitation and without doubt, "Yes, oh my god, Howie – yes!" The tears were falling down both their faces as he slid the ring onto her finger, both of them taking only a second to admire how perfect it looked there before she pulled him up so their lips could meet. Her hands moved to the back of his neck, before sliding up ever so slightly to grip at his dark hair. Howie wrapped his arms around her waist as he pulled her flush against his body, when the kiss finally broke, their breathing was heavy and their cheeks flushed before she turned her eyes towards the food. "We can eat later." Was all she managed to get out, knowing he was on the same page as she was – he always was. The brunette squealed as he picked her up, their lips crashing together once again in a messy but passionate kiss as he stumbled his way back towards the house, neither person really paying attention to the path ahead, too caught up in the overwhelming joy the other brought them.

It was everything she could have wanted in a proposal – something just for them, nothing over the top or overwhelming – it was perfect and he was perfect. And Maddie wasn't sure she could have imagined anything better than it being just the two of them, in a home they had chosen together. "I love you, Howie." She whispered as be finally placed her down on the couch, both having accepted they weren't going to make it up the stairs without having to break apart, something neither of them wanted right then. "I love you too, Maddie Han."

The way it sounded was enough to make her gasp again as she pulled him down on top of her, "I like the way that sounds." He smiled and she could tell by the way his eyes sparkled as his fingers brushed over the bottom of her dress that he had enjoyed saying it as much as she had enjoyed hearing it. "Say it again."

When he repeated himself, Maddie decided the way he said her name was her favourite thing in the world, she couldn't imagine anything more fitting or just so perfect than that.