Chapter 2

The dinner table on the small balcony was full, full of food, bursting with bodies and wine and laughter.

"Oh, man remember that time that you got taped to the flagpole Wallace. Welcome to Neptune!" more laughter erupted.

Logan is seated next to Wallace, occasionally slapping his back while recounting more wild tales from Neptune High's good old days - if you could possibly call them that.

He seems different. More relaxed. Confident. Calmer.

Broader, definitely broader.

Wearing snugly fit denim jeans and a plain black t-shirt, his arms are so wide the sleeves were riding up. Hair cropped short, brown.

I sit across from him, forcing a smile onto my face. Laughing at all the old stories. Thankfully, political life had trained me well. Just smile, Veronica. Don't stop smiling.

It was hot. Too many bodies, too much noise. Too close.

Logan picks up his wine and faces me, properly, for the first time.

I hold my breath.

So far I'd been avoiding looking directly at him, like staring into the sun. It could only do damage.

I had to make contact, those brown eyes, locked onto mine. Burnt caramel, flecks of gold.

"Remember that time Miss Veronica Mar….. sorry, Kane thought it was great fun to hide a bong in my locker?" he grins, that classic, shit-eating grin.

Lines that weren't there before danced out from his eyes. Age suits him.

I nod "Yes, I remember it well. Those were the days…." I pretend to stare off into the sunset, dramatically. "I was always happiest when getting you suspended."

"God, we got away with so much stuff back then. What were we doing? We were kids! Getting involved in murders, theft, violence, affairs, heartbreak," Logan heaps more potatoes onto his plate.

"If I even THINK about our kids doing ANYTHING we did at 16," Wallace laments and we all laugh.

"Sounds like you guys had a pretty crazy childhood," says Bianca.

We all nod silently for a moment. It was pretty crazy.

"We did alright, though, didn't we?" asks Duncan. "We all turned out okay? We're gainfully employed, all married, living reasonably normal lives," he looks around the table.

Logan coughs.

"Yeah, no longer married," he interjects. Everyone looks at him, mouths agape.

My fingers instantly travel to his bare ring finger. How did I miss that?

"Shit, sorry Logan," says Mac.

"Ahh that's okay, it's been a while now. The divorce only officially went through last Spring, but we've been separated for a long time."

Divorced. Separated. A lump forms in my throat, I try to swallow it.

I immediately stand and start to gather the empty plates. I need to do something with my hands. I'm clanging knives and scraping off scraps while he continues.

"Marriage just wasn't what we imagined, I think. We were too young. Of course, the Navy didn't help. She hated that I was away all the time."

Mac puts her hand over mine gently and nods her head, silently instructing me to sit. I obey. I pick up my wine glass and take a desperate gulp. Logan's eyes flick to mine again.

"Where are you based now?" asks Wallace.

"Nowhere, after Christmas, I was honorably discharged. It had been 12 years and too many deployments overseas. I was offered a part share in a private security company run by a few old Navy buddies, so I decided it was time to leave. I'm actually here because I'm heading up the Southern California division. So Neptune will be my home again."

Cheers went around the table.

Sweat trickled down my back, slowly curving its way along my spine.

Neptune. Logan's home.

I sit back into my chair, letting the sweat soak into my shirt.

"So you better get used to me at dinner parties now, feel free to set me up with any fine single mums from school."

I involuntarily snort.

"Do you take issue with that, Veronica?" he challenges.

"I just figured you'd be more interested in hitting up the colleges, looking for some fresh young meat?"

"Oh, not me. Not anymore, I've mellowed. I can't keep up with young crazy things anymore. Maybe it's time for me to settle down. Again, properly this time."

Wallace looks at Bianca, "We know a great woman from our PTA, we'll have to introduce you."

Logan nods. "Most certainly," and drinks his wine.

"Geez man, when was the last time we saw you? It seems like forever!" Wallace asks.

Logan pretends to think. His eyes hit mine for a tenth of a second. It was so swift I wasn't sure it even happened. Five years. It was almost five years ago, but of course, he knows that.

"Wasn't it at the bachelor party, just before the wedding?" says Bianca.

"Yeah, that sounds about right," he says casually.

"And then you bailed on the actual wedding," cut Duncan, scolding Logan. "Don't think we haven't forgotten that!"

Logan looks down, picking at his fingers.

"I got called to duty, and you know what it's like. I can't really say no," when he raises his eyes, I see it. Sadness, guilt, fear. It was there. Hidden. But still there.

"Well, we really missed you, man, it was a great day," Duncan stares at him, starry-eyed. Remembering.

We all nod in unison. It was a great day, despite it all. I relaxed, had fun. Gave into fate and the plans we'd made.

Duncan starts clearing the plates, so I pick up my collection and follow him into the kitchen.

At the sink, I run the tap and rinse the plates. Duncan opens the dishwasher to load them in. We are like a well-oiled machine.

Rinse, stack, rinse, stack.

"I offered Logan to stay here for a few days while he's waiting for his apartment to settle, is that okay?" Duncan looks up at me.

"Ummm sure," I am taken aback.

I stare into the dishes like they hold the answers to the universe. This was not a good idea. Duncan feels my trepidation.

"Come on. He was your best friend for years. I thought it would be good for you for both of you to spend some time together. You spend all day in this house. You need some company while I'm working. He's good fun remember? Go out, have some drinks, relax."

I turn and see Logan standing in the doorway. Our eyes lock.

"Seriously, I can get a hotel. I already had one lined up, but Duncan insisted," Logan holds up his hands in surrender.

I shake my head. "No, no, of course not. We have plenty of room here. Please stay."

Logan grins.

"Excellent, it's settled then!" Duncan seems relieved. People-pleasing until the end.

"I'll be working anyway, so I'll say out of your hair. The settlement is Thursday. I should have keys on Friday."

Duncan leaves the kitchen to collect more plates.

Logan moves forward, leaning his hip against the counter. I hold a dripping plate in my hand.

"So no uniform anymore? Disappointing…"

More grinning.

"True, I've still got it though …"

"No," I put up my hand, "All good, regular clothes are more than fine," oh god. Shut up, Veronica.

Shut. Up.

The banter, it comes so effortlessly, it falls out of my mouth. Instantly I want to shove the words back in.

Another shit-eating grin. Brown eyes, smiling.

"Right." I stack in the dripping dish, "More wine?" I grab a bottle out of the fridge and bee-line back for the balcony.

The house is quiet again, the guests all gone.

I open up the spare room, deposit some fresh towels on the bed and smooth out the sheets. Logan follows behind with his duffel bag, looking around.

"Towels, bed, bathroom down the hall. Help yourself to anything for breakfast. I can help you with the coffee machine in the morning. It's temperamental. Sorry, there is no cool air at the moment, I'll call them again tomorrow. There is a fan." I point up. I wipe the sweat from my brow again. So hot. He doesn't seem to feel it.

"Cool, thanks," he flings his duffel onto the bed and starts unzipping it.

"Okay, Goodnight," I turn to leave.

"Veronica… "

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry."

I stare at him, questioning. He's wringing his hands together, over and over. A familiar nervous trait.

"I'm sorry I didn't call. I'm sorry I missed your wedding. I'm sorry I've been MIA. Things just got…" He hesitates momentarily. " I needed to get myself in order, my life, my marriage." He laughs, a little bitterly "Not that much of anything could have saved that."

"It's fine."

"No, it's not. I was a shitty friend. I'm sorry." He looks sincere, sad.

I wave my hand away, "bygones." He nods.

I leave the room, walk to mine and collapse on the bed. Duncan is propped up on pillows reading through his paperwork, glasses on. He doesn't speak, neither do I.