I'm sorry

Day 15 – Sacrifices

Adrien lay in bed replaying his morning over and over in his head.

He had woken up with Marinette in his arms, her legs tangled in his. For a long time, he pretended to stay asleep so he could savor this moment. He resumed tracing his fingers tenderly over her arm and started drawing out letters and phrases on her skin. Marinette. I like you. I think you like me too. I am Chat Noir.

When she finally stirred, she looked up sleepily at him and he was starstruck. He would have killed to wake up next to her every morning if it meant she looked like this. Her hair was messy, her cheeks flushed, her lips sparkling in the morning light sifting through the window. She stared at him for a moment with confusion, before her eyes blowing wide. She made no attempt to get up which made him happy.

"Morning, sleepy head," he said finally.

"How-how long have you been up?" she stuttered, her voice rough with sleep.

"A while," he decided on the truth. "I didn't want to wake you."

She rubbed her eyes and yawned. "What time is it?"

"I don't know."

He heard Nino snore from the other couch.

She hummed. "Probably still early since Alya isn't up yet."

He made a face. "She stays up late and gets up early?"

Marinette rolled her eyes and nodded. "I don't understand it either."

She started to get up, but Adrien tightened his grip. "Wait," Her eyes went wide again. "We don't have to get up yet." He didn't ever want to let her go.

"I know, but," she blushed, but still pushed the covers off of them. "I gotta go."

His cheeks got hot. "Oh, sorry. Go ahead."

She wouldn't meet his eyes. "I can come back, though. You know, if you want." Her voice was small, and he wondered vaguely if she was as nervous as he was.

"Yes, please," he exhaled in relief.

She smiled timidly and scampered off.

Unfortunately, before she was able to crawl back next to him on the couch, their friends had woken up and they all began to cook breakfast.

He wasn't able to take his eyes off of her all through breakfast, sharing butterfly inducing smiles and watching her blush before shying away from his gaze. She was absolutely breathtaking in the most effortless way. He was absolutely taken by this girl who had made her way into his heart without him even realizing it.

With the way she was flirting back with him and returning his smiles, he was almost sure she felt the same way about him. He had never thought in a million years the girl he liked would have feelings for him, too.

He was having the best morning of his life. Sitting next to the girl of his dreams and his two best friends was the happiest he'd been in a long time. That was, until he had to make his way back to Nino's house.

They had made it back in time, and now it was all he could do but reminisce about his magical morning.

"If I have to hear you sigh one more time, I'm going to barf," Plagg interrupted his thoughts. "And I just ate a slice of aged camembert."

"Plagg, have you ever been in love?"

"No. Unless you count cheese."

Adrien ignored the small god. "I think she likes me back."

"Oh, so we're officially over the bug?"

"I think I'm going to ask her on a date."

"I'll take that as a yes, then."

"So you think she'll say yes?"

"Would your father even allow you to date someone? I mean, he barely lets you go to school as it is."

Plagg had a point. If his father found out he had a crush, he might take Adrien out of school. Then again, "If he knew it was Marinette, the promising designer, he might approve."

"And what if he doesn't?" Plagg gave his chosen a sympathetic look. "Look, kid. I'd love to sit around all day doing nothing but eating cheese all cooped up in your room, but I know you'd be miserable. Is she worth that?"

Adrien stared at the floor trying to process his feelings. Going back to homeschooling, he would be miserable. But the thought of seeing Marinette at school every day with nothing but a simple question separating him from holding her and never letting go was just as horrible. Although, being able to look at her daily did have a lot more perks than the alternative.

He held his head in his hands. "I don't know what to do."

"Well," the kwami offered with a mischievous grin. "There is one way to have both. But you're not going to like it."

"Tell me," Adrien begged hopelessly.

"You could just date her in secret."

His first instinct was to shout 'no way, I can't lie,' and shun the kwami for even suggesting such an utterly ridiculous idea. But he couldn't bring himself to. He had to admit he was intrigued by the idea. But what would Marinette think about it? If she even said yes.

This whole debacle was completely hypothetical of course, because he still wasn't 100% sure she even had feelings for him back. He assumed so based on last night and this morning alone, but there was still a margin for error. In fact, up until yesterday he thought she was in love with Luka.

"I mean, you should at least talk to her first, right kid?"

Adrien nodded. He should. What had he to lose?

Going to school like a normal kid, his friends, his father's fragile trust, just to name a few.

But he knew he had the whole world to gain.

He convinced his bodyguard to drive him to the bakery on the guise of getting macarons as a surprise present for his father and Natalie. Did he also bribe him with the promise of chouquette's? Who's to say.

His heart was thrumming in his ears. His nervous anticipation almost matching the night he confessed to Ladybug with that rooftop picnic.

"Drop me off here, please," he said. It was a couple blocks away, but he couldn't bring himself to be dropped off at the front door. He wanted at least the semblance of privacy even though he knew he had none.

As he walked towards his heart, he struggled to find the right words to say to her. In the end, he settled on asking her for a date and making the confession Future Adrien's problem.

He stopped at the cross walk directly across from the patisserie and glanced up only to have his heart shatter. He watched in morbid fascination as a blush formed on her cheeks and she leaned forward to press her lips against Luka's cheek. His stomach dropped as she pulled the guitar player in through the doors her giggle reverberating painfully in his ears.

He stood statuesque on the sidewalk for several minutes before turning sharply on his heel. His mouth was dry and there was a weight oh his chest making it difficult to breathe as he shuffled his way back through the crowded streets.

So, he thought bitterly. It wasn't me after all.

He plopped himself into the backseat of the car, ignoring his driver's inquisitive looks.

"They were closed," he offered his weak explanation.

He stared at his hands, eyes stinging with defeat. He had to find something positive about this. He had to. Otherwise, he would lose himself.

He recalled the confident smile that formed on her face as she looked at someone who was not him. At least she seemed happy.

He could be content with being her friend as long as she was happy. Right?