Day 1: Shirou — Everyday Life

My body is made out of swords.

My blood is of iron, and my heart of glass.

I have survived countless battles.

Not even once have I retreated,

Not even once have I been understood.

I was always alone, intoxicated with victory on the hill of swords.

And thus, my life has no meaning.

Certainly, this body was made out of swords.

The dreams of Shirou Emiya were filled with fire and swords. He saw Fuyuki City flooded by a sea of flame. It was the catastrophe from ten years ago, which had claimed the lives of his parents and countless others, and which had been seared into his mind forever. He saw a hill made of thousands of corpses skewered by swords, a single figure standing at the pinnacle. This image was not from his memories; but within the dream, it felt just as true and real to him. And he saw a golden sword. Unlike the other images, he knew it must be only a dream, because it shone far too brightly and beautifully to be real. Though it was beyond his reach, he couldn't help but stretch out his arm and try to grasp it...

"Sempai? Sempai, it's time to wake up."

Shirou was awakened from his dream by the gentle voice of Sakura Matou. Sakura was the younger sister of Shinji's best friend, Shinji. A couple of years back, Shirou had been injured in an accident at his part-time job, and Sakura had started coming by his house each day to help look after him. Though he had long since fully recovered, it had become something of a routine for Sakura to stop by each morning and each evening.

"Oh, hi Sakura." Shirou said. "Is it already time for breakfast?"

"I just finished making it." Sakura said.

Shirou followed Sakura to the dining room, where Taiga Fujimura was already seated. Taiga was an English teacher at Homurahara high school. She had been a close friend of Kiritsugu, the man who had adopted Shirou after the death of his parents in the great fire ten years ago. When Kiritsugu himself had died five years ago, Taiga had become Shirou's guardian.

"About time you got up, Shirou." Taiga said. "You don't normally sleep this late."

"Sorry, Fuji-nee." Shirou said. "I've just been having some weird dreams lately, and it's been messing with my sleep schedule."

"Well, just as long as you don't miss breakfast." Taiga said. "Sakura's food is so good that it would be a sin to let it go to waste."

"There's no need to flatter me, Fujimora-sensei." Sakura said, looking down in embarrassment.

"Don't sell yourself short, Sakura." Shirou said. "Your cooking really is excellent."

"Th-thanks a lot, sempai." Sakura said, blushing. "I'm glad you enjoy it."

"You sure made a lot." Shirou said. "I'm not sure I can eat it all."

"It's fine." Sakura assured him. "If there's any leftovers, I'll take them to school for lunch."

Even though it was just an every-day sort of idle conversation, chatting over breakfast always seemed to make Sakura so happy. Shirou knew that both of her parents were deceased, and she didn't seem to have a particularly close relationship with her brother, so perhaps she felt happier eating here with him and Taiga rather than in solitude at her own house.

Taiga had to leave for school first, in order to prepare for her classes, but Shirou and Sakura left soon afterwards. When they reached the school, they parted ways to go to their separate lockers. When he reached his, Shirou found that there was already a familiar blue-haired boy standing there, apparently waiting for him.

"Hey, Shirou." the boy said.

"Hey, Shinji." Shirou said.

Shinji Matou had been Shirou's best friend for the past few years. However, they'd lately begun drifting apart. Shinji was developing a real attitude problem, acting like he was better than everyone else. Shirou didn't like the changes that had come over Shinji, but there didn't really seem to be anything he could do about it. Hopefully, it would turn out to just be phase. High school could be a stressful time in a teenager's life; perhaps once some of the pressure had been taken off his shoulders, Shinji would return to the way he'd once been.

"Have you heard?" Shinji asked. "Rin Tohsaka's absent today. Apparently even little miss perfect misses school once in a while."

Shirou could guess why Shinji sounded so happy about it. He'd heard from some of his friends in the archery club that Shinji had asked Rin out on a date and gotten shot down. Shinji was really not the type of person who took rejection well, so now was nursing a grudge against her.

"I hope she's come down sick with something unpleasant." Shinji continued. "Maybe if she misses enough days, she'll lose her position as top student. That'd teach her not to be so cocky."

"You really shouldn't say such things." Shirou said.

Shinji scowled at him.

"Don't tell me you're siding with her." he said angrily.

"I'm not taking anyone's side." Shirou said, raising his hands. "I barely even know Tohsaka. I'm just saying it's not nice to wish such things on other people, even if you don't like them."

"You're such a softie, Shirou." Shinji said. "It's so hard to take you seriously when you go around spouting sanctimonious bullshit like that."

"It's just the way I feel." Shirou said.

He may have said it a bit more defensively than he intended, but people questioning his ideals was a bit of a sore spot for him. Living selflessly and pursuing the benefit of others above oneself wasn't sanctimonious bullshit; it was the noble way of life he had inherited from Kiritsugu. Even if others couldn't live up to that ideal, he wished they would at least respect it. But Shirou forced himself to calm down. Perhaps his words to Shinji had been a little unintentionally condescending. Shinji and Shirou were old friend, so Shinji had expected him to take his side in his dispute with Tohsaka; by trying to stay neutral, Shirou had hurt his feelings. That's all there really was to it.

"By the way, Shirou." Shinji said. "I noticed that you came to school with Sakura again today. She spends a lot of time at your house, too. There isn't anything going on between you two, is there?"

"What?" Shirou said. "No, of course not. She just likes cooking for me, that's all. Besides, it's not like it's just the two of us; Fuji-nee is always there with us."

"I'm glad to hear that." Shinji said. "As her brother, it saddens me to say that Sakura is a woman of loose morals. I consider it a responsibility of mine to make sure she doesn't do anything inappropriate. You understand, right, Shirou?"

Shirou was frankly rather upset by Shinji's insinuation about Sakura. She was one of the most polite and reserved girls that Shirou knew, and his first instinct at hearing Shinji insult her was to come to her defense. However, anything he said would probably just upset Shinji more. Shirou was getting the sense that Shinji was actually jealous of him. It was no secret that, while Shinji was popular with the girls at school, it was only because his family was wealthy. His rejection by Tohsaka and the fact that Sakura preferred spending her time with Shirou rather than him had probably shaken his self-esteem. Shirou could only hope that Shinji would get the message and start to clean up his act.

The rest of the school day passed uneventfully. After school, Shirou went to his part-time job, and then returned to his house for dinner with Taiga and Sakura. After they'd eaten, Taiga turned on the news. Unsurprisingly, the lead story was about the current serial killer active in Fuyuki City. The murders were brutal, the victims' bodies destroyed nearly beyond recognition by some unknown method. It had been two months since the killings began, and there were still no leads. The police department was coming under serious fire for alleged incompetence in their handling of the case. People were being advised not to wander the streets after dark; particularly foreigners with blonde hair or blue eyes, who seemed to be the killer's preferred choice of target.

Just watching the report made Shirou's heart fill with anger. Life was something precious, which should never be wasted. His experience in the fire ten years had taught him that. He would never forgive someone who cruelly stole life and destroyed the happiness of others. For now, he might be powerless; but someday, he would follow in Kiritsugu's footsteps and become a hero of justice. He would have the strength to stop such evil with his own hands and save everyone.

"I'd like you to start walking Sakura home at night." Shirou told Taiga. "It's not safe for her to be out alone."

"Consider it done!" Taiga assured him.

Shirou relaxed. Though Taiga could come off as flaky and unreliable, she was fearsome with a kendo stick. Sakura would be safe as long as she was with Taiga.

With that taken care of, there was one more thing Shirou had to do before going to bed. He headed out into his backyard to an old tool shed. This shed was Shirou's secret workshop. Though Taiga and Sakura knew he spent a lot of time here, they assumed he spent it practicing his technical repair skills on appliance. In actuality, he used it for practice of a more arcane type. It was the place where Shirou went to train as a magus.

Kiritsugu had initially tried to discourage Shirou from becoming a magus. According to Kiritsugu, while Shirou had a natural affinity for "structural grasp" magecraft — the ability to instinctively understand an object's fundamental structure and composition — it was a mostly useless talent and Shirou lacked the aptitude to become a true magus. However, seeing Shirou's determination, he had eventually relented and agreed to teach Shirou the most useful application of structural grasp — "reinforcement". Because of Shirou's lack of natural ability, performing magecraft on the level of reinforcement was dangerous; therefore, Shirou made sure to practice it every day in order to prevent his skills fresh.

The first step was the most dangerous: Shirou had to construct a Magic Circuit. The way Kiritsugu had explained it, all magic drew its power from a mysterious energy source called prana. Prana existed in the world in two forms: "od", the inherent energy found within all living things; and "mana", the energy produced by the planet itself. Alone, neither was sufficient for magecraft: od, while immediately available, was not large enough in quantity; and mana, though bountiful, could not be accessed. The thing that defined a magus was the presence of a Magic Circuit, which allowed them to absorb mana from the world and process it into a useable form.

Shirou assumed a meditative stance and began to construct a Magic Circuit. First he analyzed his body's own internal structure, focusing on one of the nerves in his spine. Then, using his od, he set about changing the nerve's structure, altering it to become a Magic Circuit. The process was slow and painful; it felt like a red-hot iron rod was sliding down Shirou's back. However, he didn't allow the pain to distract him; if he made a mistake at this stage, he ran the risk of causing himself permanent spinal damage. With unwavering concentration, he continued inserting the rod until his Magic Circuit was complete. Now he was capable of performing reinforcement.

For practice today, Shirou picked out an old lamp. He placed one hand against it and closed his eyes, analyzing its structure and composition. Once he had the blueprint firmly in mind, he spoke the words of the spell.

"Trace, on."

Kiritsugu had taught him that the purpose of a spell was not to change the world, but to change himself. When a magus altered the world within his mind, the world outside of himself would change to match. That was the power of prana, the ability to force the world to conform to one's will. Shirou altered the blueprints within his mind...

...and the lamp shattered.

Shirou sighed. As amazing as the power of magecraft was, it still had its limits. If there were any defects in his mental imaging which made the structure he visualized something that was impossible to exist in the world, his reinforcement would fail. Kiritsugu had stressed that magecraft only provided an alternate way of doing things that were possible by other means. Something truly impossible, such as reversing time or resurrecting the dead — or constructing a lamp which, due to a design flaw in its blueprints, would have been a non-orientable manifold — could only be achieved through True Magic. That was the equivalent of a divine miracle; something beyond the reach of mere humans. Kiritsugu had thus cautioned Shirou not to become conceited; many mages believed themselves superior to humans without Magic Circuits, but in the end magecraft was still bound by the same limits of human ability.

Shirou prepared to try again. This time, he selected an old sword to reinforce. For some reason, swords were easier for him than anything else. He didn't even have to touch them to use his structural grasp magecraft; just laying eyes on one was enough for him to gain an understanding of its fundamental structure. The blueprint that appeared within his mind seemed somehow more solid, more real than the sword itself.

"Trace, on."

This time, the process proceeded flawlessly, the shape of the sword changing to reflect the image in his mind. The blade grew longer and broader, the hilt thickened, and a line of unusual symbols appeared down the center of the sword. Almost unconsciously, Shirou had based his reinforcement on the image of the sword that had been appearing in his dreams lately. However, while he had replicated the sword's appearance, his reproduction felt false and shallow; he hadn't captured the sword's essence, its true nature.

It was frustrating. The essence of the golden sword seemed tantalizingly just beyond his grasp. He felt as though he would be able to reach it if he pushed himself just a little further... but at the same time, he sensed an unbridgeable chasm between the sword he held and the sword he imagined. This sword was mundane; the sword he dreamed of was something divine. No matter how much you incremented a finite number, you would never reach infinity; and no matter how much he strengthened the structure or reproduced the accumulated experience, he wouldn't be able to turn this physical blade into an ideal one. That would take something a step beyond reinforcement; a magecraft the likes of which he had never heard of before, but which he felt tugging insistently at some deep part of his soul...

But it was starting to get late. He might not have been able to make the sword match his dream, but his success at reinforcing it without breaking it was a worthy accomplishment. He definitely had the sense that he was making real improvement in his magecraft; Kiritsugu would surely be proud to see how far he had progressed. But school was also important, so Shirou decided to pack it in for the night. He could always continue his training tomorrow.

Shirou lay down on his futon, and soon he was dreaming that familiar dream. A black sun above a sea of fire, screams of pain and despair rising from amidst the burnt landscape. A man standing on a hill of swords, his body pierced by countless weapons. And a golden sword, shining with divine light, like something too beautiful to be real.