"You've GOT to be kidding me," Max Goof says rolling his eyes. He is back in Goofy's house visiting for the summer. He only had a year left of college. He was already the hot snot following the release of his movie An Extremely Goofy Movie. It only got better when he starred in Twice Upon a Christmas with his co star, the beautiful Maggie Tanner as his love interest. He was the cool kid on campus. Everyone wanted to be his friend. And his dad was one of the legends- G.G. Goof aka, Goofy. Everybody wanted in. Unfortunately, Max had his head on straight. He didn't trust just anyone. And that only made him cooler. That's why to he is shocked to be sitting in his old room on his cell phone talking to the mouse that he often views like an aunt. The queen of Toons herself-Minnie Mouse.
"Max, please? I can't watch her tomorrow. I'm hosting the Princess Ball and everything needs to be set up in Cinderella's palace by midnight tonight. I'll be exhausted and I still am expected to make an appearance." Minnie pleads on her end. She is in her kitchen with a checklist in front of her.
"Have you ever met her? And you want me to babysit her for six hours? She's going to drive me crazy! She can be such a pain in the-"
"MAX!" Minnie Mouse hisses, "Vanellope is not a pain, she just has a lot of restless energy. Now I am not going to ask you twice young man. You are going to watch Vanellope Von Schweetz tomorrow night and THAT'S THAT. Am I understood?"
Max rolls his eyes, slumping on his desk, "Crystal clear. But you know, you can't keep forcing me to do stuff like this. I've got things to do."
"Like what?" Minnie asks, "Playing video games? Going to the beach? The roller rink? Gee... those all sound like activities you could do with Vanellope! Maybe you ought to try that instead of just thinking of yourself! It's not like you have a girl friend right now anyway."
"Don't remind me," Max sighs thinking of his ex girlfriend. They had really hit it off on set, and then something happened. Their relationship just faded. Everyone believed they were destined to be together forever. Sometimes he just wonders...
"Max, listen," Minnie says gently, "The truth is that Vanellope really liked hanging out with you the last time Goofy took the two of you to ride Land of Tomorrow's Speedway Go Karts. When I couldn't take her, she specifically asked about you. Please don't give her a hard time and try to have fun. Please?"
Max sighs, rubbing his palms over his eyes, "Okay, okay! I'll try to have fun and keep her occupied."
"Good! Ralph is going to drop her off at your place at 4 p.m. and she has to be in bed by 9 p.m. Ralph says she has a photoshoot for Teen Toon Magazine tomorrow morning and she needs her beauty sleep. Rapunzel is going to be her hair stylist tomorrow, and you know how energetic she gets in the morning."
"Okay... so drop off at 4, in bed by 9, pickup at 10. Anything else?" Max asks.
"Feed her pixelated food only please, not real food. You know what that does to her. Oh! And no sugar no matter how much she begs. Apparently real sugar tastes a lot different from Pixelated sugar and you will regret your entire life if you give her the real stuff." Minnie lists.
"Anything... else?" Max chuckles.
"Yes, actually. KEEP HER ALIVE PLEASE. Anyway, have fun tomorrow!" Minnie says.
"Wait! What about pay-" Max groans as Minnie hangs up, "ment. Great. At home for the summer, stuck babysitting even though the big summer skating championships are coming up."
He hears a knock at his door. He spins to find Goofy at his door. He has on his usual pink apron. Max sighs running his hands through his hair.
"Hey there son! Dinner's ready!" Goofy beams with a grin, "Who was ya on the phone with?"
"Minnie. Psh, she wants me to babysit Vanellope tomorrow while she is at that dumb Princess Ball." Max says getting up and walking with Goofy downstairs.
"Now son, those are Princesses and Queens you are talking about! They have done a lot for the young ones. Their huge role models for all the humans and the Toons. They can't help it, they're-"
"Just drawn that way," Max rolls his eyes. "Yeah I get it. Come on Dad, let's go eat. What are we having?"
"Well I tried to make some yummy mac and cheese, with good old fashioned burgers, but I cooked the mac and burnt the cheese and the burger patties got away from me." Goofy shrugs.
"So wait, what are we eating?" Max asks as they reach the kitchen. Goofy smiles and pushes open the door to find a box of pizza on the counter.
Max and Goofy share a laugh, grabbing plates and sitting down at the table.
Max and Goofy had spent the rest of the night Vanellope-proofing the house. Goofy may be a Goof, but even he is no fool. The least he could do is tidy up and put away anything that might be precious. Outside they had cleared the backyard and put away all of Max's roller skates, skateboard slides and other equipment that he used to workout during the day. They knew Vanellope knew better, but she can't help the way she was created. She lived for danger, exciting things, the fast lane. And as her creators evolve her character, she has only gotten more reckless.
They all understood how the laws of the Tooniverse work. The humans create, they get the 'Twinge' or at least that's what the Toons see it as. The Twinge was a feeling they all get when something new is created with their characters. A memory that they start to have, a calling to head to the movie studio. As the Tooniverse became more apparent back in the 1900s, their artists started confiding in them, trying to help them grow where they wanted while producing quality work. The Tooniverse and the Universe worked in sync now and it has only grown as the imagination grows.
Max had done everything he wanted to do early that morning, ready for when the time would come. He takes a deep breathe as he watches what looks like a Jeep but covered in bricks and candy pulls up to the front steps of his house. "You got this Max," Max tells himself as he trudges downstairs. He adjusts his red sweatshirt and pulls up his blue jeans.
"Help me, help me, help me, help me," Max starts muttering to himself as he opens the door. Standing before him is Ralph and Vanellope.
"Thanks for doing this Max. Felix and and I are headed into Mainstream to meet up with some storyboard writers for a spinoff series of the 30 years before Vanellope." Ralph puts his giant hands on his hips.
"Anything to keep the brand alive eh?" Max laughs.
"And me making money, don't forget!" Ralph laughs with him. Vanellope rolls her eyes with her arms crossed, "We can't all be forever popular like you, Van."
"I'm small, adorable, relatable, and a PRINCESS Ralph. Why wouldn't kids love me? Plus they see me as a glorified Mario Kart racer, I'm practically everything a little girl wants to be wrapped in candy." Vanellope says.
"Alright, kid. I'll see ya tonight okay?" Ralph says.
"Whatever, just get out of here so I can hang out with Max!" Vanellope says hopping around.
They wave goodbye to Ralph and Vanellope turns to scowl at Max.
"Okay listen," Vanellope starts, surprising Max, "Just because I'm forever stuck in kid form doesn't mean I'm ACTUALLY a kid."
"Hey, I was in the same boat as you for a long time," Max shrugs.
"Cool, so you get it then! I DON'T need a babysitter, so think of this as just a hangout where I do what I want, and you can do what you want, okay?" Vanellope says skipping past him. She looks around for a bit and spots Max's Toon Switch console.
"Now we're talking!" Vanellope says, "Hey Max-a-mile, why don't we race?"
Max lets out a sigh of release. She seemed more mature than the last time he had seen her. Maybe she was finally adjusting to being a toon. It's hard living in the Tooniverse when you are still adjusting to the fact that you were created by someone from the Mainstream's universe. It was even harder getting used to the Twinge. Max had gone through it 4 times, from the George Geef Goof cartoons, to Goof Troop, A Goofy Movie, an Extremely Goofy Movie, and Mickey's Twice Upon a Christmas. Vanellope only had to experience it once.
Max pulls out his all time favorite racing game, Racers Gone Rogue. It was one of the craziest Toontendo racing game ever released. He figured since Vanellope's last Twinge, a good ol' game of Mario Kart wasn't going to cut it.
Max settles down to hand Vanellope a controller. Vanellope eyes the controller and raises an eyebrow, "What are you doing?"
Max inspects the controller, "Um, giving you something to use? How do you expect to win if you don't have a controller?"
"Who said anything about using a controller?" Vanellope smiles conivingly.
"Wait, what's that look for?" Max's eyes widen, "Vanellope what are you ppllaannninng!"
Without warning, Vanellope grabs Max's hand and glitches. Max felt like his entire toonage was turning to bits, being stretched, weaved, ripped and put back together. When he finally composes himself, his ears are filled with screams and loud rock music. His heart is beating at the speed of light. He tugs his hand away from Vanellope, falling back on what felt like gravel.
"What the!" Max looks around his hand burning from the pavement. The pavement was hot from the burning sun. He hears a microphone squeal and he looks over to see Vanellope cheering at the top of her lungs. His jaw drops as he stands to his feet.
"Oh no," Max says. This was beyond the trouble he thought Vanellope was going to get him into. She had glitched him inside the game! "VANELLOPE ARE YOU CRAZY?"
There are bleachers lined on either side full of video game characters pumping their fists and cheering.
"LLLLLLAAAADDIIIIESS AND GENNTLEMEN!" An invisible announcer's voice calls, "Welcome to the end of the road! Just kidding! Welcome to the race of your life! Pick your car racers!"
A hologram appears in front of him and a list of cars plus their stats appears in front of him. He looks over to see Vanellope already scrolling through with a huge smile on her face.
"Vanellope what are you doing?" Max asks, "Take us back!"
"Max chill! It's the exact same thing as playing the game!"
"THIS IS NOT THE SAME THING! I'M INSIDE THE GAME!" Max shouts. Vanellope rolls her eyes and walks over to him.
"Max, you already know the items in the game, you already know the track, the cars and their stats, the other players! You got it all under control. Now you just have to actually steer. Come on, you play extreme sports right? Dirt bikes, roller blading, skateboarding? Now just add extreme racing to that list."
"Vanellope, I wasn't written a racer like you!" Max crosses his arms.
"Get a grip, fartbrain! You know just as well as I do that some things are up to the humans, and some things are up to us. We do get some kind of say of what becomes of us. We're ACTORS. Our genetics know when to Twinge and when not to. You can have hobbies outside what Mainlanders see." Vanellope says, "So why don't you pick a car, and let's go for a drive?"
Max ponders this for a second but then nods. He has been living as a Twinge for too long. He needs to develop a sense of self. All Toons go through it. Jessica Rabbit came to that realization a long time ago. Her saying is always 'I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way'. He was never much of a reader, but perhaps it was time he read her best selling book across the Tooniverse and the Mainstream world, Bad is Relative.
"Okay fine. Let's do it. One race but THAT'S IT." Max points his finger at her.
"Sweet cream and beans! Let's get moving!" Vanellope selects the Monster X, a Jeep with monster truck wheels, no doors and bull horns on the front of the car. Max settles for the Better Run sports car. He marvels as it appears in front of him. A convertible with a rich purple paint job, neon glowing wheels, a tricked out rim and a spoiler. Max can't help but bend down and kiss the wheels.
They hear a horn, calling all racers to the track. There are 12 racers total. The other 10 racers materialize out of nowhere and Max runs to hop in the car. He looks down at the controls, expecting it to work just like a real car, except there are no meters or anything usually deemed important. There were only 2 pedals, a steering wheel and three buttons. One button was red, one was green, the other yellow.
"What the-" He is interrupted as they hear the countdown.
"Get ready to eat my molasses snarf blat!" Vanellope shouts back at him.
"Stop hanging out with Ariel and Scuttle!" Max hisses at her. The light flashes green and Max steps on the pedal, but his back tires squeal. The people and the bleachers laugh and he looks over to see the words penalty flashing on the screen.
"You've got to be kidding!" Max says. He lifts his foot and presses down on the pedal. His car instantly jerks forward at a speed he wasn't expecting. His cheeks are practically behind his jaw and his hands work to steady it. He screams, almost running into a wall. Max spins the wheel to the right but he runs into a box, smashing it to bits. The pieces fly overhead and he ducks. He keeps driving, passing under a tunnel. Up ahead he sees a glowing, floating orb.
"Praise the maker! An item!" He slows to drive into it and he watches as the green button flashes what looks like an explosion. "YES!"
Max shouts as he presses the button. The item is released and he picks up the pace, still swerving as if he has never been in a car. In the distance he hears two rumbles and one explosion. He looks towards the sky to see the status update. The item had bumped Vanellope from first to fourth. Unfortunately it didn't do anything for Max. He is still in last place. And way behind eleventh. Max grits his teeth.
"i'm gonna do it! I'm gonna do it! Time to go turbo!" Max presses on the gas as hard as he can. He is practically screaming at the top of his lungs as he weaves through the course. He doesn't know how he has survived so far, but he feels like this is the best way to catch up. He runs into pretty much every wall, runs through slow patches, but finally he can see eleventh place. Max rounds the corner pushing down on the pedal at top speed. He is inches from eleventh place. Just a couple more seconds... just a couple more feet...
Then a horn blows and his car instantly stops.
"What?" Max looks around watching as eleventh place speeds ahead, "What happened? I was right there!"
"Look up, slow poke," Vanellope says driving up next to him. He looks up, and sure enough he had been seconds to eleventh place, but he was also seconds from the finish line of his second lap and everyone else's third.
"I only did 2 laps?" Max gasps.
"You were disqualified because everyone finished their third lap but you." Vanellope smirks.
Max leans back in his car feeling more than dissatisfied. He scowls, sinking lower in his chair.
"I know you said only one but-" Vanellope starts.
"Forget it! We're doing another round!" Max says getting out of his car, "And this time I'm not holding back! I'm gonna go full force and I'm gonna win!"
"Uh huh," Vanellope giggles a bit, "Well you have fun with that. We'll see how long you last. Let's do snow village."
The scene changes and they are now on a snow track. They hear the announcer again and Max hops into his car and waits for the countdown. He looks over at Vanellope who sticks her tongue out at him. Max fumes in his head and revs his engine. He takes his foot off the pedal on count two and slams the pedal on count three. They all take off, Max scoring an acceleration. Everyone takes off and banks right. Max swerves a bit but is able to steady he is at seventh place at the moment, while Vanellope is sitting pretty at fifth place. Max hits the gas as fast as he can.
"There's a turn coming up!" Max tells himself, "I got this! I got this, I got this, I got this, I got this..."
He banks hard left but the car still spins out of control and he screams as the car drives straight off the course and he is plunged into an abyss. He feels something yank at his soul and his mind goes blank. He sees nothing but darkness and before he knows it he is back on the course with nothing but the feeling of motion sickness, dehydration, and discombobulation. Max stares forward feeling dumbfounded. He waits to regain recollection of what was going on around him but his shock of what had just happened has scared him white. Literally. His skin had faded to white.
He takes a couple deep breathes and the color starts to return to him. He grips the steering wheel so much so that the leather bends. With shaky hands, he presses the gas peddle, but just as the car starts to move he brakes. He starts again but a couple seconds later breaks.
"Don't die... don't die... don't die." Max tries to console himself. He hears the screeching of tires and he holds his breathe. He looks over to see Vanellope with a smirk on her face.
"How'd the fast life work for ya?" Vanellope asks.
"I-It w-w-wasss... I f-fe... cliff," Max tries to say but his voice is failing him.
"Take a step into my ride and let me show you how it's done," Vanellope says patting the passenger seat. Max cautiously gets into Vanellope's monster truck patting the seat.
"Where's the seatbelt?" Max asks. becoming more frantic.
Vanellope laughs hysterically, "This is RACING Max. Toon racing. You'd better hold onto something."
Max screams as Vanellope steps on the gas. She had waisted so much time the other racers were catching up and she needed to make sure they didn't pass her. Max holds onto the grip above, another on the roof of the car. Vanellope drifts right, the snow being tossed onto the sidewalk. Vanellope laughs and whoops as she speeds through. Max looks like he's going to vomit, but she keeps up the speed.
"Watch this!" Vanellope says. Max sees the speed bump and item and he looses his voice to protest. As he turns he holds his breathe as she takes the speed and banks left taking the shortcut which is a winding tunnel. The truck races up and over the wall, turning upside down and back again safely. Max was screaming at the top of his lungs by now which is only fueling Vanellope's energy.
Behind her she sees three items pummeling towards her.
"Eat my dust chickens!" Vanellope shouts. She presses the yellow button and releases a red trail of fire that burns all of the items headed towards her.
"How'd you do that?" Max screams.
"The red is a speed power up, the green releases an item forward, and the yellow sends the item backwards! Come on dude it's basic driving skills!" Vanellope says. The car straightens up and she can see the finish line. She looks over at an already terrified Max but doesn't stop. She presses the red button and speeds through the finish line. Vanellope cheers and hollers. The rest of the players past the finish line and they disappear, resetting the game. Vanellope jumps out of the car and Max follows. He stumbles out of the car and onto his back.
Vanellope cautiously makes her way around to stare at him. She pokes his arm but she can see his chest moving.
"Are you okay?" She asks.
"That. Was. Awesome." Max says quietly, "But I NEVER want to do that again. In fact, you can KEEP this game once you get us out of here. I am a roller blader, I lift weights, I skateboard, I solve mysteries, but I WILL NOT. RACE. CARS."
Vanellope gives a laugh and takes Max's hand. She glitches and they are back in Goofy's living room. Max looks over at the time and they only had two and a half hours left and Vanellope would need to be in bed soon.
"Okay, maybe I shouldn't have taken you in there." Vanellope admits, "It's just that you're so good at the sporting thing I thought you would enjoy doing it with me."
Max sits up trying not to hurl, "Vanellope, I'll admit I wasn't keen on babysitting. But you didn't need to take me through death to get me to have fun with you. I've always had fun with you. You just have so much energy that sometimes it's hard to keep up with you."
"Really? Did you have fun today?" Vanellope beams.
"I had tons of fun! I feel like I'm dying, but it was still fun." Max says, "So, how about we get you something to eat and get you to bed?"
"Pssh, who says I'm tired?" Vanellope rolls her eyes. But just as she says that she lets out a huge yawn.
"Like you said earlier, our bodies know what part of us is Twinge and what part of us is us. As a video game character you might not always need sleep, but you're a Pixel generated Toon who needs sleep to function properly." Max says.
"I know, I know," Vanellope frowns, "Recharge or die hard."
"That's right," Max smiles. "Now let's get something to eat."
"Ooooh we can have-" Vanellope starts but Max holds up a hand.
"Nope, I already ordered in some food. I was given specific instructions. You're on a pixel only diet."
Vanellope groans, giving Max something to laugh about. Max takes Vanellope's hand and together they head to the kitchen.
The rest of the night went off without a hitch. They had fun chatting and playing board games until Vanellope falls asleep with her head on Max's lap a quarter till nine. They had been watching reruns of Tail Spin and she had curled up next to him with a blanket and eventually fell asleep. She had exhausted him just like he thought she would and he eventually fell asleep himself. At five till ten, Max hears the doorbell ring. He struggles to open his eyes and looks down to find Vanellope still fast asleep. A tired Max scoops Vanellope into his arm and hands her off to Ralph. Ralph thanks him and tries to give him some simoleon, the official currency for the Tooniverse. Max declines and sends them on their way. He sighs, looking back on how much fun he had today and heads to bed.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Thank you for all the reads and follows thus far! I'm trying to keep the original concept of ToonTown from what we already previously know about it from the parks to Who Framed Roger Rabbit, Bonkers!, House of Mouse, and ToonTown online. It is never set in stone the full extent to what ToonTown is, how it works, and who lives where so bear with me as I piece it all together.