Chapter 9: Recovery and Discovery
It was a bright sunny day on a weekend in June, just two weeks after Donna's pinning ceremony. Josh and Donna hadn't seen each other since, but for different reasons then they led the other to believe. Both were working hard at their jobs, but were also skillfully avoiding the question of where their relationship was going. Both knew they had made an incredibly risky public move at the pinning ceremony. With Donna's new promotion, it was even more risky now. So, they kept their distance.
That didn't stop them from communicating, however. At least twice a week, at a time when Josh knew Sam would be out for the evening, and Donna knew that no one from the barracks would bother her, they would call one another. It was a time when they could just be together, just the two of them and the cell phone lines.
But after two weeks apart, Josh had realized that he missed Donna. So, when he got the invitation to Colonel Toby Ziegler's retirement ceremony, he accepted. Not only did he want to watch his old friend end his service after 24 years in the Army, but he also knew Donna would be there. Leo's advice still permeated his brain: take a flying leap while he was still young; but remember the boundaries set in place by the Army. As he and Sam drove to the retirement ceremony that Sunday, he was conscious of the advice, and yet was still prepared to behave professionally.
They arrived at Fort Myer at about 9:45 am, shortly before the ceremony was supposed to begin. Josh could immediately see Donna sitting next to Charlie and Carol, all in their dress uniforms. They were sitting next to CJ and Will, so Josh knew he couldn't do anything right away.
CJ turned slightly, noticing them. "Seaborn, Lyman! Get over here!" Josh and Sam approached the group.
"Hey, everyone." Josh said as they sat down.
Will, CJ, Charlie, and Carol all greeted the pair. Donna gave a small smile and a slight wave in return. Josh was about to say something to her, but Donna slightly shook her head. Later, she mouthed. Josh nodded in understanding-no need to blow their secret now, not when today was supposed to be about their friend and his accomplishments.
Suddenly, Donna was distracted by a voice from above. "Well, well, Donnatella, I figured I would see you here today!"
"Officer Bartlet!" Donna cried, surprised but very pleased. She and the others stood in the presence of an officer.
"What brings you all the way from New York, sir?" CJ asked.
"Well, I may not have taught Colonel Ziegler myself, but I've gotten to know him pretty well through all of you. And a man who's taught you everything he knows? What a better man to honor than that?" He paused as Abbey and Zoey approached. "Plus, I wanted these two to see what a real retirement ceremony looks like."
"Jed, you'll get the retirement ceremony you deserve and not a thing less." Abbey bantered back. "How are you, dear?" she asked Donna, turning to envelop the younger woman in a warm hug.
"I'm so glad you came." Donna told her. "I feel like I haven't seen you since…" she trailed off, not wanting to think about the last time she saw the Bartlets.
"Since Ellie's funeral." Abbey replied in a bleak tone of voice.
"How are you guys doing?" Donna asked. "Really?"
"It's been hard." Abbey admitted. "But we're getting through it."
"Abbey?" They turned to Officer Bartlet. "I think it's high time we took our seats."
"Will we see you after?" Donna asked.
"Of course." Officer Bartlet told her, lightly squeezing her arm as the Bartlets walked to the back and sat down.
Zoey, meanwhile, was talking to Charlie and had sat next to him.
"Hi, Zoey!" Donna greeted.
"Hey, Donna!" Zoey replied, greeting her with a hug. "How are you?"
"I'm good! How are you?"
At this, Zoey sighed. "Getting through."
Donna started to realize that the Bartlets were not exactly coping well with Ellie's death. She made a mental note to ask her later as the ceremony began.
…
Toby was not the only Army officer retiring that day, so the ceremony was long. Donna listened intently to the speeches honoring the different officers and wondered if she would have such a storied career to speak of when her stint in the Army was over. She stole a glance over at Josh and wondered if he was thinking the same things.
Finally, it was Toby's turn.
"Colonel Tobias Ziegler has been serving his country for the past 24 years." Colonel Santos read off the teleprompter. "He graduated from James Madison High School in Brooklyn in 1972, ready to serve his country. But on insistence from his mother, he decided to go to college. He had acceptance letters from NYU, Columbia, West Point, and the Naval Academy. He chose West Point because he wanted to be in the Army. He was commissioned as a Second Lieutenant in 1976, and was immediately shipped overseas to Korea. Ziegler holds the distinction of serving in every major American conflict since the mid-1970s. He was part of the team that unsuccessfully invaded Iran during the Iranian hostage crisis. He was part of the successful Operation Just Cause in Panama. And then, he deployed as a Lieutenant Colonel to the Persian Gulf to participate in Operation Desert Storm. For his work organizing the missions of his unit to assist in American military action in Kuwait, he was awarded the Army Commendation Medal, and received a highly coveted promotion to full Colonel. And for the past several years, he has overseen missions and deployments in Kuwait and Bosnia. Colonel Ziegler has touched many lives over the last 24 years, but none more so than his colleagues. He has given so much of his life in service to this country, and we are proud to honor him as he retires from the United States Army with full military honors."
Everyone applauded politely and mightily as Toby stood for recognition. Within seconds, the entire regiment was on their feet. Donna looked at Toby and took in his full dress uniform: His ballpoint cap squarely on his head, the dress blues uniform with his medals and regiment numbers hanging from it, not to mention his colonel insignia on the shoulders. His nameplate was on the left breast pocket, and he stood and faced the crowd, very solemn and very proud. Donna couldn't help but feel proud of him, even though she had only known him for a couple of years.
After a performance of "The Stars and Stripes Forever" by a small quorum of the US Army Band, the ceremony was over and everyone got up to congratulate the retirees. CJ reached Toby first.
"Congrats, Ziegler." she said, hugging him.
"Thanks, Cregg." Ziegler told her. "You could get something like this in a few years."
CJ shrugged. "I've got a few more years before I think about retirement."
Meanwhile, Josh and Donna had noticed one another, but it was decidedly more awkward.
"Hi." Josh started.
"Hi." Donna replied, wanting to keep the conversation going.
"How have you been doing?"
"I've been doing great. Just working hard."
"That was some ceremony today, wasn't it?"
"It certainly was." Donna and Josh fell into an awkward silence.
"Listen-" Josh went on. "Call me tonight?"
Donna smiled softly. Nothing had changed between them after all. "I'd love to."
Josh paused. "Is it too soon for me to ask you out to dinner?"
Donna shook her head. "Better not." Josh's heart sunk.
"But, if you'd like, I can come over for dinner at your apartment sometime next week."
Josh smiled. "I'd like that. Why don't you come next Friday? I think Sam's going out for the night."
"Does he know we're seeing each other?"
"Does anyone?"
Donna shrugged. She didn't want to incite his wrath by revealing that she'd confided in her best friend.
"So, does 6:30 work?" Donna asked, eager to get the topic away from the inflammatory.
"6:30 works great." Josh replied.
"I should go congratulate Toby." Donna said. "So, Friday, 6:30?"
"You know it."
With that, Donna walked over to Toby, who was now surrounded by people, including a red-haired woman she had never seen before.
"Oh, Moss, this is my ex-wife Andy." Toby said, introducing the pair. "Andy, this is one of the lieutenants I told you about."
Donna stuck out her hand. "Donna Moss."
"Andy Wyatt." said the woman with a smile. "It's a pleasure to meet some of the people Toby works with."
"I didn't even know he was married." Donna admitted.
"We split about five years ago. I guess you could say I got sick of living the life of a dutiful Army wife."
"That and we were having trouble having kids, which just added to everything." Toby supplied.
"So, where do you live now?" Donna asked, curious.
"Maryland."
"She's a lobbyist." Toby informed Donna. "Getting ready for a Congress run."
"Oh, really? Once I'm done in the Army, I've been thinking I might want to get into public office." Donna told Andy.
"Well, I'll keep an eye out for you!" Andy replied. "So, you're a West Point grad?"
"Yes, ma'am."
Andy nodded in understanding. "I-I almost didn't come today. But then I realized that I helped Toby get to this point, even if our marriage didn't work out. I figured I owed it to him."
"Well, I'm certainly glad you came." Toby said quietly.
Donna watched them carefully, and wondered if there was a spark rekindling between them. She was quickly distracted, however, by Zoey and Charlie talking nearby, as she suddenly remembered wanting to pull Zoey aside.
"If you'll excuse me, there's someone I want to talk to. Andy, it was lovely meeting you. Good luck with Congress!"
"Likewise, and thank you!"
Donna walked over to Zoey. "How's it going, guys? Zoey, I haven't seen you in ages!"
"All right, I guess. It's a tough installation, but I manage pretty well. West Point was a pretty good training ground."
"I'll say." Donna laughed. She looked at Zoey carefully. "How are you really doing?"
Zoey sighed. "It's been hard. I miss her like crazy, but I don't dare open up to my parents. They're still grieving."
"How are your parents?" Donna had seen them bantering playfully, but behind their pleasant facade she had noticed the dark circles under their eyes that hid the painful truth.
"They barely talk anymore, except at public events. Mom blames Dad for Ellie going into the Army to begin with, she worries about me constantly, and Dad-well, Dad tries to reach out to her, but he's emotionally shut down too. I just feel like my family's falling apart."
Donna bit her lip, figuring out how to respond. She hadn't expected the Bartlets to have healed completely from Ellie's passing, but she was surprised by the fact that they were on the brink of divorce.
"I'm really sorry to hear that." Donna told Zoey.
"I feel like I should talk to them. Just sit them down and say, 'You're both hurting. You need to be letting this bring you together, not drive you apart.'" She paused. "Maybe you should talk to them."
"Me?"
"Yes. They know you, they trust you. Maybe they'll listen to you."
"I don't if I'm comfortable confronting them."
"Just...talk to them. Please?"
Donna took a deep breath. "I'll try."
…
The next week, when Donna had off on a Friday, she drove up to Peekskill. Knowing she had only four hours before she needed to be back in Virginia for her date with Josh, she knew she had to make it quick. She stood on the Bartlets' porch, very much cognizant of what had occurred the last time she was there. She brushed the memories out of her head and knocked.
The door opened after a minute. "Donna!" Abbey cried. "What a pleasant surprise! Come in, come in!"
Donna embraced the woman who had become a second mother to her.
"How are things at Fort Belvoir?"
"They're going well, thanks for asking."
"Would you like some tea? I'm just brewing a fresh pot."
"I'd love some." The Bartlets' antique teapot had always been one of her favorite parts of dinner at the farm.
Abbey poured her some, then sat down. "So, what brings you out to our neck of the woods?"
"I just wanted to check on you, see how you were doing."
"Oh, well, we're doing all right. It's been hard, of course, this last year, but we're getting through it."
Not very well, Donna thought.
"Things are all right between you and Officer Bartlet?"
"I mean, something like this always puts strain on a marriage, I suppose." Donna could tell Abbey was putting up a brave front. She wondered how best to approach the question.
Luckily, Abbey seemed to read her mind. "Zoey told you things have been difficult?"
"She didn't exactly say it." Donna stammered. "But she may have mentioned you were on the brink of divorce."
Abbey nodded sagely. "I had a feeling. It's true, things have been hard. But Jed simply won't open up. I try and I try, but it seems like we're just growing further and further apart." Her voice trembled slightly. "I miss her, Donna. I miss her every second of every day, and I need his support. But I'm not getting it!"
Donna reached out and took Abbey's hand. "Maybe...you should try counseling."
Abbey looked deep in thought. "Maybe."
"Well, well, what's all this?" Officer Bartlet said as he walked in in uniform. "Donna, it's lovely to see you."
"You too, sir." Donna replied.
"Donna came up to see how we were doing." Abbey told her husband.
"Is that so?" he said.
Donna nodded. "Yes, sir." She was beginning to sense maybe she shouldn't be privy to their private conversation. "I should go."
"No, stay." Abbey told her. "Jed, I think we should see a counselor."
Officer Bartlet looked taken aback. "Excuse me?"
"A marriage counselor. Or grief counseling. I think we need to see one to get through this rough patch."
"And where did you get that idea?"
"Well, Donna suggested it after I told her how things were between us."
Officer Bartlet sighed. "It's not as if I haven't thought about it." he admitted. "The fact is, Abbey, I try to reach out to you, but you're stuck in your own fog of grief."
"Really? Because I would say the same thing in reverse." Abbey told him, standing up. "You've been in your bubble since Ellie died. And I feel like we've gone on autopilot here. We're not talking!"
"I talk to you."
"Oh, yeah? When was the last time we had a conversation, a real conversation, that didn't involve work?"
Officer Bartlet was silent. Then he said, "I guess it's been a while."
"Jed, we need to get past this. This keeping our feelings bottled up, this isn't healthy. We need to talk this out."
"I thought you hated me." The words were quiet, but they stung.
"Hated you?"
"For getting our girls to join the military."
"Oh, please. That was all their own decision. Especially Ellie. You really think things would've been any different with you influencing them?" She looked into Jed's eyes, grabbing his hand. "I love you. And, yes, maybe I was a little angry at first, but now, we need this to bring us closer together, not further apart. We need to grieve, and we need to get past this."
Donna watched, backed into a corner of the kitchen to give them space, as the two embraced. Then, as they pulled apart, Officer Bartlet said, "I'll call around tomorrow and see if there's a good grief counselor near here."
"Good." Then Abbey turned to Donna and took her hand. "Thank you, Donna, for bringing us back together."
Donna smirked a little. "All I did was ask how you were doing. I better get back."
"Won't you stay for dinner?"
"Actually, I have a date."
…
Josh had outdone himself, Donna decided as she walked into his apartment that evening. There was a candlelight dinner for two set up on the table. After Donna had gushed over the dinner for a while, they started talking about anything and everything. Donna told him about how she had saved the Bartlets' marriage, and he talked about his plans for visiting his mother as soon as he had some time off.
"You know, you could come with me. I'm sure my mom would love to meet you." Josh was saying.
"Are you sure?" Donna said incredulously. "Are we at the 'meet the parents' part of this relationship yet?"
"Why not? I met yours."
"Well, that's true, but-"
"Look, you don't have to decide right now. I just thought it was a nice idea."
"It is." Donna told him. "I'd love to meet your mom. I just wanted to make sure it was the right thing first."
Josh reached for her hand. "Don't worry, it is. My mom's gonna love you."
Donna smiled. "Okay, then." She looked at her watch. "I hate to break this up, but I should probably go."
"Donna, wait." Josh said. She turned around. "Stay here tonight."
"Josh, I don't know...this is a big step. Once we take it, there's no going back."
"I know." Josh said simply. "But I know I love you. And Sam won't be home until tomorrow. So...please?"
Donna took a breath. She wanted to be with Josh. So, even though she knew she might regret this later, she nodded.
"Okay. I'll stay here."
…
As Donna woke up the next morning, she felt more content than she had in a long time. Especially when she caught a glimpse of Josh sleeping next to her. The first time, it had been pure regret. Now it was pure bliss.
Josh woke up and propped himself on his elbow, caressing her hair with his free hand.
"Good morning." he told Donna.
"It is now." Donna replied sweetly.
Suddenly, the door opened, and Sam entered. "Josh, sorry to wake you, but we need to get to-Oh, my God!" Sam yelped as he registered what he was seeing. "Donna?"
"Hi, Sam." she said. The look on her face said it all.
"Look, man, before you say anything-" Josh started.
"I can't believe you two!" Sam exclaimed. "This is so far beyond the code of ethics, I don't even know where to start."
"Look, we're not just messing around, OK? I'm-I'm in love with her." Josh told him.
"And I'm in love with him."
Sam sighed. "Look, I sympathize with you. Really, I do. But I cannot, in good conscience, not report this. You get that, right?"
Josh and Donna both nodded slowly. They knew this day was coming.
"Do what you need to do, Sam." Donna said quietly. Sam nodded, then left, saying, "We need to be on base in 20."
Donna looked at Josh, close to tears.
"Hey." Josh said, pulling her in for a hug. " It's gonna be OK. We're gonna deal with this."
A/N: And now people are finding out! Stay tuned for the consequences of their actions, including a special appearance by one Republican female lawyer! Please leave a review, let me know what you think!