AN: I've had this written for a long time, and I know that I wanted to wait to post it until I had more chapters written, but it is getting quite slow. I'm reaching that point in a story where I have no clue what I'm doing anymore lol. At any rate, I hope this makes the small few fans I have happy for the time being.
The funeral was dreary, and his speech was just as sad.
In all honesty he had rather liked granny Chiyo despite her initial feelings about him. She didn't 'take shit' from anyone, and he had stated as such in his memoriam of her. Kankuro had also said some sweet words about her puppet mastery, and Sakura had even wrote a small piece on her last moments.
The entire time that Sakura cried he had wanted nothing more than to hold her, but he knew how dangerous it was for them if he had tried.
Thinking back on it now as he walked through the darkened hallways of the Kage building he wondered if it would have been fine for him to give an embrace to his friend and ally, but then kept circling back to how he wouldn't be able to hide his affection for her in such a scenario-
He heard crying coming from a small library they had used for their more personal tomes. Things like their childhood fairytales, cook books, learning textbooks, and family historium. It was a small room, about the size of a common bedroom lined with bookshelves on the walls, and was not very special or sought after.
The redhead peeked in regardless of who was inside, but was pleasantly surprised by who he had found.
"Sakura?"
She whipped around in an instant, holding a fistful of crumpled tissues. At first she had looked startled, but then gave a sigh of relief.
"Oh good, it's just you." The pinkette wiped her eyes, and gave a small broken smile as she leaned her back against the wall of books. "What are you doing here? Don't you have work?"
"Once again, you don't seem to realize that I need a break. I feel sorry for Tsunade-"
"Oh hush! She needs a butt whooping if anything!" Sakura giggled at first, but then her demeanor began to turn shy. Her eyes looked him up and down quickly before averting off to the side. "So... why are you here? Did you need something from me?"
Gaara blinked at her curiously as he took a step into the room. He closed the door behind him quietly, and when he turned back to face her he noticed a blush beginning to darken on her creamy cheeks.
'She must think I came here for 'other' reasons.' He inwardly laughed, but outwardly shook his head with a smile.
"I heard someone crying, and I wanted to help. I'm sort of glad it's you, because I'm not terribly good at consoling strangers." The redhead gave a soft chuckle, and felt relieved when he saw her relax.
"I saw more than enough girls draping themselves over you while crying, that must have been fun." The pinkette snorted with distaste, but he decided to be honest with her.
"I know the difference between crocodile tears and reality. I am sorry I couldn't console you out there... I couldn't draw attention to us-"
"Yeah, I was expecting to be comforted, but you kind of blew me off for groupies." Sakura feigned a jealous huff, but then managed a small smile afterwards. "I expect you to make it up to me."
Gaara gave an honest laugh, closing the distance from the door to her in the span of a few slow steps. He didn't fail to notice her eyes tracing his form for the briefest of moments.
"How would you like me to make it up to you?" The redhead murmured gently, and took both of her hands into his own to lace their fingers together.
The pinkette stared at their intertwined hands, her eyes beginning to turn sad for the hundredth time that day.
He wanted to make her pain disappear. He wanted her to smile.
"Make me forget about death for a while... remind me that both you and I are alive... and that... you love me..." A small blush appeared on her cheeks as she said it, and he slipped his fingers out from their laced hands just so he could gently cup her face in his palms. "Prove to me... how much you love me..."
Her eyes darted up to his in an instant, her blush deepening as he captured her lips with a delicate kiss. As she melted into it he pulled away to keep her captivated, and gingerly ran his fingertips down her neck and chest.
"I will help you forget. The only word you will remember is my name, and I will provide you a love that I have never given to anyone else." Gaara spoke just above a whisper, his hands tracing her curves until they focused on the hem of her skirt. He trailed up the garment until his hands played with the waistband of her shorts, tugging them down just far enough to get past the swell of her backside.
"Gaara... it's not safe in here to do this..." Sakura whimpered fearfully, and yet did not even move to stop him. His haunting cyan eyes darted up to hers with mischief sparkling in their depths.
"Alright, try to keep quiet if you don't want to get caught." The redhead smirked a bit more than what was normal for him, and the innocent flush to her cheeks nearly overwhelmed her entire face.
"Gaara, we should go-" She started to hesitate, but he put a porcelain finger to her pouting lips.
"I told you... the only word you will remember is my name-" Gaara whispered, and as he gently tugged her shorts and underwear down to her knees he gave her a knowing smile.
"Gaara-"
"...And I will provide you-" The redhead slowly got to his knees while his hands traced along her bare hips and backside.
She gasped as he moved, then looked away with a squeak as he lifted her skirt.
"-A love that I have never given to anyone else... this is my gift..." He didn't wait, the second he saw her flushed womanhood was the moment he placed his lips upon it.
Her whole body jumped from the sudden foreign touch, but he didn't let it deter him from allowing his tongue to taste her.
She tasted unlike anything else. She was sweet, tart, salty, and tangy all at the same time. Her feminine folds were soft against his lips, and the small bundle of nerves that he had always wanted to touch felt intriguing on his tongue.
"Gaara..." She whimpered his name, her delicate fingers dragging through his locks with a carnal need. He shivered under the feeling of her nails against his scalp, and let out a heated breath against her wet skin.
Sakura whined, and pulled on his crimson locks forcing him to groan with desire, but he wanted her to finish first. He wanted her to go weak in the knees, call for him wantonly, and beg him to plunge inside of her.
Gaara lapped at her greedily, tasting more of her on his tongue with every lascivious lick. He allowed the smooth muscle to slip inside her, tasting her on a full spectrum before going back to his previous work on her sensitive pearl.
"Gaara-!" The pinkette mewled sharply, tugging his crimson hair with one hand while cradling the base of his skull with the other. Her hips rose up to meet him eagerly as she panted and whined his name like a prayer.
She sounded so innocent when she made those kitten-like noises, and with each pitchy cry of his name he felt shocks go through his core. Like a siren she called out to him so that he would crash upon her frighteningly beautiful shore.
The hairs rose up on his neck as her fingers clawed into the skin, and her other hand abandoned his locks in favor of covering her whining mouth. Even behind her palm her whimpering grew terribly loud, but he no longer cared if anyone heard her.
Let them come, let them see her in the ecstasy only he could give her. All that mattered was that she cried out his name, and that she knew that he loved her enough to humbly kneel before her to pray at her sacred temple.
"Gaara-!" Sakura pulled her hand away one last time to desperately cry out his name before having to slam it back to hide her screams.
His hands gripped at her trembling hips and the swell of her perfect backside as he hungrily lapped at her. Her knees weakened enough that she had to abandon everything to hold herself up by his shoulders, and his name was screamed at him without any form of protection.
Her fingers dug into his shoulders painfully as her voice cut out into silence, she held her breath as her body tensed painfully with a powerful climax. He could taste her thickly on his tongue, her unique flavor was now bold from her intense pleasure, but it wasn't bad. If anything the taste made him hum against her folds knowing he had done his job well.
It wasn't until she started whimpering and squirming did he finally slow his motions, and it took her pulling his head back by his hair to make him to stop. He looked up at her with a heavy pant, and as he drank in her flushed and lidded gaze he felt a smug grin creep across his features.
"I wish you would look at me like that more often-"
"Shut... up..." The pinkette huffed with exhaustion, and he gave a breathless laugh as a result. As her hands loosened from his hair he took her wrist to delicately kiss the underside.
"I'm on my knees before you... is this not what you wanted?" The redhead smiled smartly at her, but then faltered as her lidded eyes only lowered further. Her flushed features deepened, but did not look shy in the slightest.
"Fuck me... please..." Sakura begged softly.
The room went deathly quiet.
Gaara had to do a double take, he shook the blood back to his brain and blinked rapidly at her in bewilderment.
"I'm sorry... what did you just say?" The redhead furrowed his naked brows, staring at her like she were a figment of his imagination.
Instead of answering him she shimmied her shorts from her knees down to the floor, and quickly stepped out of them. As she came to kneel with him he felt himself almost backing away out of shock.
"Right now? Right here-?" Gaara grunted as he was pushed back, and she clambered over him desperately. Her lips were on his in seconds, and his eyes widened in amazement from her boldness.
She was kissing him, even though he had just gotten done devouring her like a favorite snack. He knew her taste was still on his tongue, yet she dove past his parted lips to passionately kiss him despite that fact.
What had he tapped into? What was this strange phenomena that was rapidly unfolding in front of him? Did he break her somehow?
SLAM!
Both parties jumped at the sound, and went completely still. He looked over to the door, seeing a silhouette in the colored glass window. Footsteps quickly ran away from the scene, and he felt his blood run cold.
They were not heavy steps, but smaller ones. Either a woman or youth was the owner, and they obviously wanted him to know that they had seen him. This person clearly did not appreciate what he was doing with the leaf kunoichi.
"Gaara... someone... someone saw us-"
"I will handle this. Please don't stress over it, okay?" The redhead soothed her, and turned her face away from the door to gaze back into his eyes. Her worried expression pulled on his heartstrings, and he quickly stole a kiss that was gently returned.
Sakura pushed off of his chest to give them each some space, her cheeks an intense shade of red. She bit her lip as her eyes darted around his body, then backed off of him so that they could both stand.
"I'm sorry... I shouldn't have jumped you." The pinkette brushed some hair behind her ear awkwardly as he finally got to his feet, but he could find no other reaction but to chuckle breathlessly.
"I really don't mind, you should know this by now." Gaara raised a hairless brow at her, and flashed a carefree smirk. However, she was quick to scoff at him for it.
"Pervert-"
"Only for you." He stepped forward to give her a chaste kiss, then brushed past her to get to the door. He turned back just in time to see her pressing her fingers to her lips with a sweet blush. "I'm going to take care of the issue at hand, but I might call on you later-"
"Pffft! This was a fluke! I am not going to be draping myself all over you!" Sakura crossed her arms in a stubborn huff, but he knew better.
She had already approached him twice now for the one thing she claimed would never happen between them, and she had been almost violent with her desire for it. This of course did not bother him, he was more than pleased by it. However, he also wanted the moment to be special, and so he was happy for the little interruption as he knew he wouldn't have been able to stop himself otherwise.
"Whatever you would like to do tonight is up to you. I'll let you think it over." The redhead shot a genuine smile her way, and quickly retreated from the room.
His face turned to stone then, knowing that this was merely the calm before the storm. With a deep breath he calmly made his way through the building, each step sounding off his impending doom.
-...-...-...
The first odd thing was the fact that when he had reached his office the door had been cracked open; he distinctly remembered closing it earlier.
The second odd thing was that there were two people already waiting for him inside.
And the two talented men did not seem to be in the best of moods.
"Gaara, we need to talk." Kankuro was the first to speak, but Kakashi was giving him a look that said everything he needed to know.
He had been caught red handed, and had been outed. Revealed with the intent to put a stop permanently to his romantic activities.
'A woman's work indeed. I need to be careful...'
"There's nothing to talk about-" The redhead went to walk past them both, but felt his arm get caught firmly by the leaf shinobi.
"Oh there is plenty that needs to be discussed." Kakashi spoke in a low tone that demanded obedience, but the young Kazekage was not usually one to take orders from anyone.
"I respect you, Kakashi, I ask that you provide the same courtesy-"
"I'll respect you when you learn how to curb those cravings of yours." The edge to his voice was sharp like a knife, making Gaara go still.
"Kakashi, it's going to be fine. We're discussing this now, and we'll have it all cleared up in a moment. Right, Gaara?" Kankuro attempted to be sympathetic, but the redhead was more angered by it than he was eased. "It's a one time deal, it's not going to happen again-"
"It'll happen as much as she wants it to happen." Gaara turned his head slowly towards both of them with a threatening look in his eyes. The air instantly grew thick with tension while he continued to hiss. "You have no right to step in. It is none of your business-"
"I am her teacher, and I am making it my business-!"
"You WERE her teacher. Not anymore. She is Tsunade's protege now, and she is old enough to make her own decisions." The redhead ripped his arm out of the jounin's grasp with a vicious glare, a look he hadn't sported for a while, and the surprise showed on the older man's half hidden features. "She's not a child anymore-"
"Yes, judging by the way you were examining her you obviously know better than anyone else." Kakashi seethed before practically pointing a finger at him. "You preyed on her-!"
"SHE CAME TO ME FIRST! YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT US!" Gaara yelled at the top of his lungs, forcing both the men to recoil out of shock.
It was unlike him to lose his cool, and it was unlike him to mess around with the opposite sex. Obviously there was a pattern here, that she had made a special place in his world where others could not.
And it had always been that way... he had just hidden it very well.
"How long has this been going on?" Kankuro piped up softly, and his younger brother set his threatening sights on him. "Has it been going on for a long time?"
There was a silence there that he wished he had filled, as it seemed to spell out many things for the two in front of him.
"Months? Years-?"
"The latter." He finally answered, looking away from them both to go towards his desk. He anxiously ran his hands through his messy hair, and then placed them firmly on the wooden surface.
"It started a long time ago when we were kids. We didn't understand what was happening between us, and as we got older it became clearer and clearer with each meeting. My recent 'death' seemed to be some sort of catalyst, and she came to me privately to seek comfort-"
"So you took advantage of that?!" Kakashi snapped, and the sound grated the young Kazekage to the point of snarling back at him.
"I do not take advantage of those that I love!" The redhead flipped around with his lips pulled back in a feral growl, indicating that the older man should step back. "I told her 'no' last night, but she kept coming at me for whatever affection I could give! She aimed at my heart, I bent to her will gladly, and yes, today I gave her what she desired!"
Gaara gripped his head into his hands, unable to look either of them in the face. Whether it was from his own shame, or from his bitterness of being judged he didn't know.
However, an old sensation came to him. It tingled in the base of his skull where the network connected to his spine. He hadn't felt this crazed sensation in so long, it was so comforting and familiar just to lose control of his emotions. As if everything had become so simple again-
"You don't understand... you just don't get it! When someone claims they care for you... you cannot turn them away... not when you feel so strongly for them. She has worked past my defenses, I have been unmade, you can never understand! Never! I am alone with these horrifying emotions-!"
A warm hand gripped his shoulder, and he flinched out of defense, but realized that it was only his older brother trying to console him. His face was gentle, his demeanor echoed safety and sanctuary. It instantly eased the younger brother, knowing that someone unconditionally had his best interests in mind.
"Gaara, I'm not judging you for it. Kakashi is a bit pissed, but you know I'm with you." This time his reassurance was comforting, and it had the redhead grateful that he had a kindly older brother.
"If you hurt her-" The silver haired man growled one last time, but stopped as he watched the redhead show a pained expression.
"No harm will come to her. I care far too much to watch her suffer in any way." Gaara's eyes went unfocused, looking past the man into the distance before zoning out completely. "The only person who will be hurt... is me."
The room went strangely quiet, almost to the point where he could hear the blood rushing through his ears. Everything was too raw, too loud, too bright, and tasted like ashes. The stress was getting to him now more than ever, and he no longer had Shukaku with him to give him any unwanted advice. No beast to inspire him to do better out of stubbornness.
No voice, no presence...
He was alone, horribly alone with himself.
"I need to go." The redhead stood up quickly, shaking his head at no one in particular. "Recent events have put too much pressure on me, and I hate to admit that I need some time to recover from it..."
Why was he saying these things out loud? What was wrong with him?
"That might be best... you're not looking too hot." Kankuro moved quickly to get to his brother, and help the younger to his feet. The world spun slightly regardless of how slowly he stood.
The ichibi's absence had a strange effect. Although his life force had been restored the initial damage to his person had not. All these years of avoiding sleep had been successful only due to Shukaku's power and presence. Now that there was no bijuu to heal his internal discrepancies, like brain damage from never resting properly, his body now decided it was time to catch up on all the recuperation it desired.
Stress, it seemed, was enough to make the Kazekage want to pass out.
"Woah!" Kankuro hollered as he held up his brother's weakened form, but the redhead no longer found the capability to stand as black spots appeared in his vision. "Gaara?! Hey, bud! You okay?!"
He could hear him, but he couldn't move his eyes anymore. All he could do was breathe.
"Shit! He's out cold!" The puppeteer sounded panicked, but an older voice seemed to calm him down.
"He's been through a lot of trauma, physically and mentally. I don't blame him for checking out." Kakashi sighed, and Gaara felt another pair of hands on him. "Let's get him on the couch, I'll watch over him if you want to grab a medic."
His body was set gently on a soft surface, and he was surprised that he could still hear everything that was being said despite losing everything else.
"I'll be right back, Gaara. Don't get any worse, okay?" Kankuro's voice was concerned, but the elder brother was quick to run out of the room regardless of the fact.
There was breathing, his own shallow inhales along with someone else's...
"I'm not so angry at you as I am with just the situation, I am simply protective of the people I care about. I can see that you obviously love Sakura... and there is nothing wrong with loving another person." Kakashi murmured gently, and the redhead felt his hands be folded across his own chest. "I just don't want to watch you two fall from the sky, which will inevitably happen. You know this too."
'Of course I do. She doesn't want me the way I want her... but I can't justify throwing away what I have just because I cannot have everything.' Gaara said inwardly, and if he could he would tell the man to his face how he felt.
The redhead was madly in love, near masochistic in his affection for her. He wanted to marry her, make children, and hold her wrinkled hand with his when they became old and grey. Despite this wholesome desire he knew it would never come true, as she had made those same plans with Sasuke in mind. Not him.
Right now, he was the rebound. Someone to pass the time, and ease the pain of loneliness. It would always be this way, and he had accepted that fact long ago.
Although, the worst part was how he compared it to death. You know that it will happen, but despite that fact you still desperately pretend that it is non existent, or that it isn't a factor now so it shouldn't be concerning.
Unfortunately it didn't change the truth of the matter, that all things end.
"That's why I was so stern with you. I know what it's like to be young... I've had my fair share of loves and heartbreaks. I don't want that to befall on either of you, forgive me." Kakashi fell from speaking softly to a mournful whisper. His warm hand wrapped comfortingly over the redhead's, and clenched his palm tight. "Find another girl, Gaara. I don't want to see you die again, my friend."
'If I had a choice in the matter... but it is not so easy.' Gaara thought sadly, his hand managed to twitch and close tighter in the leaf ninja's grasp. A slight bittersweet laugh sounded, but that was the last thing he heard before everything just shut off completely.
The redhead was clocked out for the day.
AN: I hope you guys are still liking what I write. Eventually I want to move to AO3, it's just getting the motivation to do it that's the problem.
I have more fictions I've written, a lot more themes and prompts, but I wish to have them majorily finished before I post them. And with the way a re-read everything about 20 times (I'm not even exaggerating) that's going to take a long fucking time. My memory is absolute garbage, so I forget what I write almost immediately after I write it, so I re-read several times while writing, before posting, and I will have to re-read chapters before even writing the next. It's... torture kind of... but I also don't mind it? It just makes me very tired unless I am incredibly inspired.
So, I humbly ask for your guys' forgiveness for the time it takes on these, and I also thank you graciously for your patience.
3 Please review, and don't spare me anything. I read all of them, and some I hold very closely to my heart.