Aziraphale slapped himself on the forehead after he got wind about what the humans of the world were deciding to do. Humans were stupid. There was no polite way of putting that.
A tower to God. Had the Great Flood not been enough to show them that perhaps God didn't like being plotted against? Besides Heaven didn't exist in the sky but in another plane of existence. Humans were so gullible and stupid. When they couldn't explain something they just went straight for the dumb acts of impulsivity.
He shook his head from where he was standing as he watched the fiasco. He had not been surprised when for his meeting last month the archangels explained God was about to move in a big way. What he was surprised to hear was She Herself would be coming down to scramble the human's languages.
Aziraphale almost jumped out of his sandals when he felt a demonic presence behind him. He looked and saw the snake eyes of Crawly.
"Oh, it's you."
"Hello to you as well."
"Well we are hereditary enemies and usually when one's enemy sneaks up behind him his first order of business is not a customary greeting."
"So what's with this whole tower business?"
"Why do you care? They are threatening heaven? Besides they will fail. They have no powers and failed to consider that heaven might not be as close as they think."
"I see. But the Big Woman up in the sky has a problem with it yeah? What She planning to do about this whole mess?"
"Why so many questions?"
"I am trying to get information for my side obviously. Lord Beelzebub wants to know what is going on and therefore sent me to get information from a knowledgeable source. Oh, and by the way, the demons all think I executed you by Hellfire so you are welcome."
"Well if you must know God is planning to scramble up their languages forcing them to go to different sectors of the world. She is taking away their collaborative privileges I suppose."
Crawly chuckled at this.
"The humans are already finding new and exciting ways to kill each other over things like skin color and gender and now God is about to add a new thing to their hate group list. Ha!"
Aziraphale rolled his eyes.
"On a more positive note, this is a great opportunity for humans to grow and expand their cultures outside of each other. The only thing I am worried about is how this might affect me."
"Pretty selfish and not angelic of you at all."
"Well if you must know I do not want to learn a bunch of different languages and speech. Besides when the humans start writing it will only make things more complex. They are already drawing. You have seen the cave paintings."
"That I have. I am in some of them you know. I could show them to you if you are interested."
"No thank you. I don't hang out with the other side."
"Is that an angelic hint of some kind that you don't want me here?"
Aziraphale did wish Crawly would stay but he had work to do and the place would be swarming with angels any second now and he would be severely reprimanded over being seen socializing with a demon.
"Yes, it rather is. I bid you a good day." With that, he spread out his wings and flew down to get a closer look at the humans. He was also supposed to count up all the different languages God was scrambling up.
Oh, bother this was going to be a long day.