Uriel did not like the humans. She finds them very annoying and distracting. She would never understand why that insuerable Aziraphale seemed to enjoy them so much. She honestly could not believe how stupid that one ludicrous human...what was his name again...oh yes Jacob...was. She honestly felt like she was about to take a flaming sword down there and end his miserable life herself whenever Aziraphale or any other angel they sent to earth discussed whatever stupid thing the human had done.

She didn't find it amusing at all. Not one bit. Whenever Gabriel laughed she wanted to punch him. He barely knew anything about the humans and whenever he learned something he thought it hilarious and exciting. She found nothing funny once so ever about wasting resources and being an idiot.

And that annoying Sandalphon. She had no idea why Gabriel insisted on bring him everywhere. She had split ways with her Seraphim a long time ago. He, of course, did everything for Gabriel all the time. It was annoying beyond comprehension. He wasn't even an archangel but Gabriel insisted bring him to every single reporting process.

She also didn't trust Micheal. Something was going on between her and that traitorous angel of death Azreal. Uriel could not even imagine touching that disgusting creature. It honestly made her want to gag.

Then Micheal went on this whole rant about how Aziraphale smelled like Hellfire. Please. Aziraphale was the dumbest angel she ever had had the misfortune of crossing paths with and she absolutely despised him for it. The stupid Principality couldn't keep a secret if his life depended on it. If he had gone to Hell or was having any interactions with any sort of demon he would have been dead already or they would have known about it.

But back to that dumb Jacob. Ladder dream or whatever. Something to do with prophecy. Everything was working like clockwork.

Then he served some guy named Laban to marry his daughter Rachel but ended up marrying the wrong person then had to marry them both. Ugh! Human marriages and relationships all sounded so disgusting and complex.

Then all the sons and daughters he had and had to marry like four of his servants.

Even God had gotten sick of him and gone down to tango with him Herself. Then he made up with his brother. Aziraphale loved that story. About how kind and loving the humans were. Pathetic. Uriel hated the idea of mercy or forgiveness. If people were acting up they out to be thrown into the flames of Hell.

Then he settled in someplace called Shechem and the name was so stupid and who even cared at this point. Aziraphale was just wasting their time with petty stories. He got way too attached the humans and Uriel did not like that one bit.

Then Shechem defiles Dinah or something. She had no idea what Aziraphale was on about and honestly just ignored that part of the story. Who cared about all these human politics? She just wanted to know where evil was afoot and how they could destroy it and in the quickest way possible.

Then he got named Isreal. Whatever that meant. Honestly, Aziraphale's monthly reports at this time were grasping for straws on the interesting content meter. She wondered when they would get to destroy another city of sinners and demons.

Even worse poor Rachel died. Literally no one asked Aziraphale. So annoying. All the archangels gave her flack for not being kinder but she honestly was so done with the Earth and the human race at this point.