Guess who is baaaaaack? Maybe? Here's an update.
I have zero excuse for the long absence other than I have just had zero inspiration and zero time.
"Why do you keep looking at me?" Jennings mumbled to Seth. She lifted her eyes from her ipad and looked at him in the dark of the car.
"I'm trying to figure out where you got a quesadilla from," he answered.
Jennings had her iPad in her lap, scrolling through various social media platforms to catch up on the thoughts from that night's live show and a small cardboard pizza container balanced on her leg, a gooey, cheesy, chicken quesadilla tucked inside of it.
"I know people," she smiled.
"I can't even get catering to put bacon on a burger for me and you get specialized items?"
"One of the cooks has a thing for me. I flirt with him and he gives me special treatment." Seth rolled his eyes. "Don't get jealous over there, I'll get some bacon thrown your way."
"It's irritating how 'in' you are sometimes."
"Same to you."
She caught another eye roll from him in the dark and she bit back a smile. He glanced at his phone that was settled in the cup holder between them when it vibrated and the screen lit up and quickly returned his eyes to the road. A silence settled for a few moments.
"You're kind of moody tonight," she stated.
"I'm tired," he replied.
"You sure that's it?"
"Yeah, I'm sure. Everything just kind of catches up from time to time. This, black and brave, the extra workouts and training-"
"Even Crossfit Jesus gets burned out," she interrupted, wrapping up his statement for him.
"Something like that," he chuckled.
Jennings cast a quick glance towards the backseat before giving him her attention again. "We can skip training this week. I can do my own thing at home and you can get a break from me. I have Nola's birthday on Thursday anyways."
"I thought you just wanted to switch your day to Wednesday."
"Yeah but if you want a break it's fine. I'm not trying to hog all of your free time…or burn you out."
"You aren't and you won't."
"Seriously, Colb, it's not going to hurt my feelings."
"I'm serious, too. And yeah you can just cancel if you want to…but you can't," he responded.
Jennings frowned at him. He added a small shrug, "I have a surprise for you this week so I need for you to come to Davenport."
They were well over a month in to working out together and training and two weeks in to the traveling trio of Seth, Dean and Jennings. They had settled in to a routine already; Jennings letting her deal with Dean slide and spending most of her time occupying the shotgun position so she could chat with Seth. She had forgotten how good it could be to just hang out with him, driving in the dark, and just talk or silently listen to music.
"I don't know how to feel about this," she said. "Like a gift surprise or make me run until I puke surprise?"
"A surprise is a surprise, just leave it at that."
"How do I prepare though? Should I bring something special to wear? Should I pre-game with a dose of ibuprofen? Do I not eat so I'm not full?"
"Jenn," Seth stated simply and smiled.
"What?"
"Just come as you are, like you always do. Bring Mo with you if you want to. Just relax."
"You know I'm just going to obsess about it until Wednesday."
Seth responded with a chuckle.
"I am too, bro, so can you at least tell me what it is when we get to the hotel?" Dean interjected from the back seat.
Seth's eyes cut to him in the rearview mirror and Jennings turned and looked at him, laughing softly, as he sat up in the backseat where he had supposedly been sleeping.
"Do you just lay back there pretending to be asleep and eavesdrop on everything we say?" Jennings asked him.
"Not all the time, no. Sometimes you're boring. I already know you're training to come back to the ring though so it's not a big deal," he shrugged.
"Renee?"
Dean smiled, "congratulations by the way. I'm a little hurt you didn't ask for my help, though. I always felt like we were a pretty solid team."
"She wanted someone who has two good arms," Seth chimed in, alluding to the injury that Dean had been working through over the last couple of weeks.
"Fair enough but I have two good knees so really, we're even."
"There's nothing wrong with either of my knees," Seth countered.
"There is far too much testosterone stirring up in this car right now," Jennings mumbled.
"Welcome to our world. Embrace it, Jenn," Dean said. "This is what happens when you spend all of your time with us."
"Right because neither of you had any part in strong arming me in to traveling with you," she countered.
She watched Dean and Seth's eyes meet in the mirror and then they both shrugged.
"I'm not really sure what you're talking about, darlin'," Dean stated.
"Yeah, couldn't be us," Seth added.
"You probably mistook us for your girls on that other roster."
"We would never strong arm you in to doing anything."
"Not our style at all."
"We're mild mannered; gentlemen."
"Honestly, we don't even really like you."
Seth snickered and then met Dean's eyes again, "okay that might have been too much."
"She has to know the truth sometime bro…"
Jenn looked from one to the other as they traded quips back and forth. "I hate both of you and I really hope that you know that."
"What is it girl, hmm?" Jennings chuckled as she crooned at her dog who had just sat up in the passenger's seat of her Jeep and looked out the window. The brown dog turned a look on her and then turned her attention out the window again as a low bark rose from her. "Do you see Colby?"
It was Wednesday afternoon and after a morning with her sister, Jenn had loaded up her car with her gym bag and dog, and made the trip to Davenport for the now weekly training sessions.
She has just pulled in to a parking space at the Quad City gym, next to Seth who was just climbing out of his black Tesla.
Mocha barked again and propped her paws on the window sill, her tail aggressively wagging through the air and brushing against Jennings' arm.
Seth grinned when he heard the bark and was opening the car door within a few seconds.
"Hey Mo Mo," Seth crooned, scratching the dogs head with both hands.
Jennings rolled her eyes and chuckled again. "It's kind of rude to just open somebody's car door you know?"
"I was being beckoned," he countered. "How'd she do with that drive?"
"She was fine. She slept most of the time."
Mocha put her paws on his chest to lick his face and then burrowed her nose between his body and the car door, pushing past him and jumping to the ground to meander her way across the parking lot and investigate her surroundings.
"What about you? How was your drive?" he asked, turning his eyes on her after watching Mocha for a second.
"Oh, I'm glad you care about me, too," Jenn quipped, smiling.
He frowned at her.
"It was fine," she added, answering his question. "I've been anxious this whole time though because I can't handle not knowing what ridiculous 'surprise' you have planned."
Seth grinned at the statement and wiggled his eyebrows, "you'll see."
She rolled her eyes at him and finally turned the key in the ignition, turning the car off. "Let's just get this over with."
Seth's surprise that he had been holding on to, and holding over Jenning's head, for the last five days, had been his mom. Deep in to their WOD Jenn had looked up from her doubled over position, sweat dripping to the rubber matted floor, and spotted Holly crossing the gym, smiling and greeting students as she went. Jennings had completely abandoned the workout at that point, ignoring Seth's laugh, and greeted the woman who had been a second mother to her with a fierce and sweaty hug. It had been far too long since Jennings had really gotten to see her and the extent of how much she had missed her swept over her body before she even realized it.
Seth had asked her to stick around a few times after workouts, suggesting dinner, but he had never brought up Holly, and as much as Jenn didn't want to admit it, it hadn't crossed her mind. This was a good surprise. A very good surprise.
A few hours later, she found herself seated across from Seth at the dining room table at his mom's house. Any empty glass of wine and empty plate sat in front of her, laughter induced tears pooling in the corners of her eyes as the group reminisced about trouble that Jennings, Seth and their group of friends had stirred up in their teenage years. Mocha and the family dog and settled at their feet, done with the night and sleeping without a care.
"I didn't know, ok? You didn't tell me that you had spun four different lies to four different adults, I just wanted my phone charger back," Jennings defended, referring to a night she had mistakenly gotten Seth and Marek busted for driving to Minnesota for a concert.
"I never fully trusted you again after that," Seth chuckled, shaking his head, "I was grounded for so long."
"And yet you still lied all the time," Holly sent him a frowning but teasing look.
"It was part of my charm," he grinned.
Holly shook her head and rolled her eyes. She pushed her chair back from the table and began to reach for her husband's plate and drink glass.
"Mm, let me help you," Jennings said, moving to join her.
"You can hang out," Holly countered.
"I can but you know I won't," she smiled. She reached out for Seth's plate, meeting his gaze quietly, and then turned to follow Holly in to the kitchen.
Holly reached for the dishes Jennings had in her hand, taking her place in font of the sink to wash them off.
"Are you going to go behind me and move everything around if I help you put these in the dishwasher?" Jennings teased.
"No, I'll be happy for the help," Holly smiled.
They were quiet for a few moments, handing the dishes between them.
"Speaking of happy, I'm happy to see you," Holly mentioned, "I'm happy to see you two getting along. I didn't want to point it out while everyone was together, but it's really good."
There has been brief 'what have you been doing with your life' discussion over dinner but none of the parties had touched on the subject of Seth and Jennings getting the band back together. It was unmentioned and glossed over. Jenn had preferred that.
Jennings smirked, "we're working on it, but it's good…it's nice. It's been fun to be back in the gym and training, I hadn't realized I missed it as much as I did. And him too, I guess, but don't tell him I said that. I missed you much more."
Holly smiled, "Colby won't tell me what your match is going to be."
"That's because I won't tell him," she laughed, "don't share, but they're going to do a women's rumble, I'm going to re-debut in that and hopefully it'll carry over to a full time role."
"Jenn! That's going to be incredible." "Right?"
"And my lips are sealed, I promise."
They both looked up to the kitchen window when there was a flash of lightning outside. Jennings frowned at the clear sign that a storm was rolling in. The last thing she wanted was to drive home in a storm.
"Hey," Seth appeared in the doorway to the kitchen, "I know you two are catching up without me and I respect that but we might want to head out shortly."
"Are you going home tonight?" Holly asked, her eyes going slightly wide as she turned her look on Jennings.
"I planned to."
"You can't make that drive in the rain, hun, you know I'm not going to let you do that."
"I've driven in worse out on the road, I'll be alright."
"No, you won't, stay here," Holly countered and turned her gaze on Seth. "He has 3 empty rooms over there. There's no reason for you to have to go."
Jennings and Seth exchanged a look across the kitchen.
"You know you're always welcome, Jenn," he said.
"I..yeah, I know, I just didn't want to assume and impose or anything, I'm fine really..." she shrugged and stuttered, clenching the dish towel in her hands.
"It's settled, no more arguing, you two go and get out of here," Holly smiled. Jennings pursed her lips in to a weak smile, briefly, and then brightly smiled at Holly, meeting her in another fierce hug. "I expect for you to be around more, ma'am."
"I absolutely will be."
They shared goodbyes and after rousing Mocha and getting the sleepy dog out the door, she and Seth walked the small distance down the driveway to his car in silence. The wind was picking up and cooling things down, the rain was definitely close.
They were quiet for a few minutes as he backed out of the driveway and started out of the neighborhood, his XM radio station playing quietly and filling space in the car.
"You don't actually have to stay if you really don't want to..." Seth started, breaking the silence.
"I don't mind it, I don't really want to drive home in a storm anyways," she replied.
"Why are you irritated then?"
Jennings sighed, "I'm not...not irritated. I don't know, I don't know how to explain it Colbs."
She shrugged in the dark, not caring if he could see it in the dim light cast by the radio and various buttons on the dashboard.
"Can you try?"
There was another sigh, this one a little longer. "Sometimes I just get reminded of," she paused for a few seconds, "of finding out that you'd been hiding this huge secret from me and that you had lied and thrown me under the bus. 'I never trusted you again', yeah, clearly you really didn't."
It was his turn to sigh heavily. "You know I didn't mean it that way."
"I know you didn't but it doesn't mean I can stop from feeling it, because I did feel it. It makes me second guess all of this."
"If you're second guessing if I trust you then yes, I absolutely do trust you. I wouldn't be doing this, I wouldn't have pushed for this if I didn't want to get that back. So that you didn't second guess yourself."
"I'm trying."
There was another silence that settled between them, minus the music still filling the void in the atmosphere and the sounds of Mocha licking a paw coming from the back seat.
"I'm just tired, I think," she finally said, breaking the ice that had started to settle. "I'm tired and I'm sorry."
"You don't have to apologize, I get it, but...just don't hold the past against me forever."