There it was, his mailbox in pieces. Burnt edges and scraps; that was all that there was left... well the post was still sticking out of the ground. Sort of. It was remarkable, the thing looked like it had been through an explosion! Rubbing the spot from the singed edges between his fingertips, the owner could only assume one thing that could have happened to it;
"It really exploded."

Sasori cleaned up what was left of his poor mailbox, muttering swears the entire time. He was furious! How dare someone come over to his house and vandalize his personal property! Not to mention it was vandalized is such a crude manner as well. Explosions? Really! On a handmade mailbox, handmade by himself!

"I guess in these days you really can't be too careful." Sasori growled as he sat at his computer doing research on what the latest and greatest home security cameras were. He loved his home! It may have been on the smaller side, squeezed on a small plot of land with not much yard at all, but it was a university graduation gift from his grandmother. A great gift taking in consideration how actually useful it was. How dare some punk kid violate him like this! Mind you, it was only his home that succumbed to any sort of explosion. If anything, the short old man down the street should be the one getting vandalized. What a crank! There was not a thing that the old guy didn't complain about.

With the camera set up facing out towards his mailbox again- while he was out buying the security cameras he purchased a new one, he was ready. Even if the perpetrator- or perpetrators came by again, he would be ready! Nothing was going to get past this baby camera- he did he research!

That next morning, Sasori smiled at his lovely in tact mailbox. In fact even the next day it shone in the morning sun, kissed with dew drops. However as he turned back and made his way back up his short path to his house, something caught his eye. Leaning a little and peering over his short white, picket, fence and into his backyard he paled. The yard was tilled into obliteration. Little holes tore up his nice little piece of lawn with the scraps everywhere leaving it a muddy mess. It was awful! They had also knocked over his trash can, spreading it out over the muddy lawn. He could pick up trash, sure, but this lawn thing would take hours of yard work and added healing time.

"Damn it!"

Back to the security camera store and a drop by to the nursery for gardening supplies, the new camera was eventually put up facing the side of his house and onto backyard and the street beside it. His lawn had been cleaned of the trash, then it was raked, reseeded and watered. All that was left was to see if his first camera had caught the person.

"Who's that?" Sasori mumbled at the camera facing the street caught a male walk by, flick his long hair and text for a little bit. It was then the man looked the camera straight in the lens and smile. Not a malicious one either! It was sweet and even ended with a slight tilt to the head. Still, this was the only person the camera caught, and they looked at the camera directly immediately.

"Who does that!" Sasori sneered, "I bet that's the vandalizer!"

Now he could speculate all he wanted, but he still had no proof. The guy in the video wasn't even holding a gardening tiller. Just because he noticed the camera didn't mean he was the vandal.

The next couple days were again quiet. Looking back on camera footage Sasori noticed something, the male with the long hair came to outside his house every single night. With two cameras now, he could see the guys path. He would walk in front of his home, stop, text, smile at the camera and then continue his walk, stop again and then look at the second camera from the street again. Of course he smiled at that camera too. Then he would loiter a bit before continuing his walk until he was gone.
Sasori was perplexed. Who was this guy and why was he always outside his house at night? He didn't look homeless; just some college student out for a late night stroll? It's just- why did he need to smile at the cameras all the time? Some would say it was not just creepy, but incredibly creepy. However looking at a still shot of the man, the guy was... was. Sasori couldn't think of the word. It was on the tip of his tongue.

"I'm sure I'll figure it out."

Sasori woke up the next morning to a blue splattered roof. How the hell did the vandal manage that!? Upon climbing a ladder to clean up and get a better look at the damage, he gasped as he picked up a fragment of a green balloon stained blue. Then a yellow one! A red one!

"So the person threw them..." he growled as he watched the video, hoping to get a clear shot of them in the process. However to his surprise, all he saw was the vandal not in the shot being seen throwing the paint filled balloons. Instead all he saw was the usual guy walking and loitering outside his house, smiling away- "Wait!" Sasori gasped as he put the clip back a bit. There it was, the guy was waving. He waved to the camera!
"It's like he's taunting me!" Sasori yelled as he gripped the roots of his hair, his face growing hot and as red as his hair as he looked on at the man smiling and waving at him.

Yeah, there was something about the guy he couldn't quite put his finger on. There was a word. What was that word again? Bah! There wasn't time to dwell on that any longer. If he wanted to keep his sanity and his house presentable, he would have to get to the bottom of this. He still had no solid evidence that this person was the vandal in the first place!

"Huh?" Sasori grunted, nose scrunching as he looked at the still shot of the mystery guy again, face close to the screen, "Is his hand a different color?"

Since it was nighttime the picture was a little screwy, however he got good cameras so he could still see that the man's hand was a mess. A mess? With what?

"Paint!" Sasori yelled as he slammed his hands on the table. It really was that guy vandalizing his house! However there was still no solid proof it was him- just Sasori's assumptions and the strangers consistent taunting and loitering.

Instead of being productive after cleaning his roof, Sasori frowned as he watched almost an hours worth of the stranger that he managed to get footage on and collect. The entirety of it. Why did he sit back and watch it? Rightfully, Sasori didn't know either. Yet that didn't stop him from pressing the replay button and watching it all over again as he ate his dinner. He wanted to say something as he chewed, but still the word he was looking for as he looked at the man; it wasn't there.

So he sulked.

And of course he sulked as he looked at the outside of his house, covered with gooey raw eggs and toilet paper. Yeah, he had been egged and TP'd this time. This one had to be the most humiliating one yet. Storming inside to watch the video first rather than the usual clean up, he glared as the stranger walked by waving with two hands this time, band a right smile. Not only that, he had stepped on Sasori's property to get a little closer to one of the cameras to smile. It was the clip of his approaching Sasori saw the toilet paper trail coming out from his pocket. Oh, and that wasn't the worst of it, oh no... before turning around to leave the property, the stranger blew the camera a kiss. A kiss.

"Sasori? Hello?"

Sasori jumped up and looked over to his door to see a middle aged blond woman sticking her head in. He immediately recognized her as his neighbor from one house down and across the street,

"Ah, yes sorry. Hello!" He quickly spoke, not realizing he had spent a too long replaying the clip of the stranger on his property, smiling and waving, with that little tilt of their head as they shyly hid behind their long hair- of course then the kiss.

"Sasori dear... do you know that your house..." she fumbled, "well..." she then lowered her voice to a nasally whisper, "...it has egg and toilet paper on it."

He clicked his tongue at the woman's decision to walk over, through his open front door just to point out the obvious. Sighing, Sasori ran his hand through is hair, "I'm aware. I'll be out shortly to clean it up."

"Will you be needing our ladder again?"

"If you don't mind."

"Not at all, dear." Hummed the woman as it really wasn't hers but rather her husbands- so what did she care. The only thing that surprised her with the ladder was that her son actually stuck his head out of his bedroom door when Sasori came by to ask to borrow it. That was kind of nice. Still, she too had been seeing what had been going on when she took her dog out for it's morning walk. It was strange to say the least as her house, as well as the whole block, was unscathed by the vandal and it was just Sasori's home. If anything, she assumed her father in laws house down the street would be the one vandalized. "But, do you have any idea who's doing this?" she asked, chewing her bottom lip.

Sasori looked at his computer screen and bit his lip, a still shot of the vandal himself smiling at him taunting him in such an odd manner. Looking at the woman he sighed, shoulders slumped, "I have no clue."

"That's awful. Just awful! What could this punk want with just you? You're such a sweet, handsome young man with a great and budding career! I only wish my son was half as charming as you."

"You're too kind." Sasori chuckled, hands waving away her compliments.

"I mean it! You're quite the catch, Sasori! Say, would you like to meet my daughter? She-"

"Sorry ma'am. I'm really not in the mood to be dating at the moment I..." he looked at his computer screen of the vandal, "I have a lot on my plate at the moment."

"I see... well when you want the numbed, I'm just across the street. Oh! And so is the ladder, haha!"

"Thank you. Bye bye now... sheesh." He groaned now that the woman finally left. Eyes glued to the screen again, he shook his head as he moved the cursor off the play button and then closed the laptop, "I can't- I have a house to clean."

Eventually even more footage of his vandal loitering outside his house accumulated. Now though instead of the man looking casual and nonchalantly, he looked plain frustrated with the pouting and scuffing of his feet around childishly. Still, he would smile and wave at the cameras as he did his walk around the block. However then one night, Sasori saw it, the man looking at his shiny new mailbox a little too closely before smiling at the camera and walking off, not even bothering to look at the second one as he usually did. No final smile, no final wave, no final kiss.

Sasori's mouth dropped as he caught on immediately. He knew what was going to happen- yet he had no proof it was going to happen. Whoever this guy was, he would be back that night to destroy his new mailbox, that he was sure of. This time though he wouldn't let that happen. He couldn't, not this time. It was personal...
This was the week he was expecting a package in the mail from his granny! He had to have a mailbox if he wanted to receive it without them taking it right back to the post office for him to have to pick up personally. His time was too precious for that!

Looking at his accumulated footage once more, the vandal had a certain time each night he would come at. With his alarm set, Sasori got dressed and waited at his door, peaking out the window, waiting. Waiting. Then there was more waiting. It had been over an hour... where was the stranger? Where was the explosion?

"I'll give you ten more minutes, you brat."

The ten minutes passed with Sasori gritting his teeth. He hated to be kept waiting. After all this- now was the night this punk chose not to vandalize? To not even loiter!? It had been a daily occurrence, so why now!
Opening the door with clenched teeth, ready to growl at anything and kick his plants around in a fit of fury, there on the one step up to his front door sat his vandal. There sat the the loiterer,

"Finally, hm." He spoke, looking up at Sasori as he toyed with his hair, hiding behind it shyly as he sent the homeowner a smile, his eyes crinkling in delight. There beside him was a bundle of fireworks, "I've been waiting forever for you to notice me."

"Cute..."

"Hm?"

"That's the word... cute... you're cute..."

Reaching into his pocket, the stranger pulled out a piece of charred wood. There on the dirty plank, that was once Sasori's first mail box, was the fragmented piece that had his name finely painted on it. The blond smiled, "Hi! I'm Deidara. Nice to meet you, Mr. Sasori Akasuna." He said hiding behind the piece of treasure.

Yeah. For a vandal, he was really, really, really cute.

"Why you little- I'm calling your mother!"

Happy bday dei. stay cute golden boy.
how did deidara pay sasori pack for all the vandalism?

edit: to better match the original idea that was discussed with haden, i changed the ending line. and... yes deidara is the grandson of the crank down the street and the son of sasori's neighbor

byelosers!