Author's Notes: Okay! Season 2 is here now, and I'm very worried for the schedule of my plots. Being a student can really make my mind not focus in the story. Even still, I would like to continue with my writings. And it's all thanks to my readers! To tell the truth, back then, I was actually going to give up with the story. Until a little savior popped up in the review section, and eventually saviors from the favorites, the follows, and the reviews became the reason for my determination to finish this. I can't thank them enough for that, and the only way to return the favor, is to write the hill out of my fingers! Thanks for the 8th time! Well enjoy the chapter!
Disclaimer: I don't own Konosuba.
Chapter 12: The Exorcist and The Assistant
'No one can escape time; it delivers us all to the same end. You can't plug your ears and close your eyes.'
-...Totally not Kazuma.
Time itself is cruel for everyone. People never notices when they ran out of it.
Everything has a time limit. Whether it would be bombs, games, and the late submission of a student's homework. Time itself can make people change.
But, do people change for the better? Or for the worst?
For me,…. I think my change made everything worse. That may be what people think…
But for me, I think I changed for the best…. But my personality never changed!
Summer itself aimed at me at full speed. Hitting me with summer's curse of love. But eventually winter will come…. And the season of fall never came…
Winter just came out of nowhere. Like love, it's unpredictable.
With the snow building up little by little in our stable. Another usual winter day, and another shivering wind blows throughout the land.
"Achooo~!"
And another sneeze from the woman I recently embarrassed myself from. With a few firewood in my hands I just watch this girl as she curls up with the raiment in her neck, her hands warming up from this pitiful size of a bonfire, slightly shivering from the air this winter sky is giving.
"So cold~. I pawned my coat, too. It's so cold…"
Karma strikes yet again to the complaining goddess, as a strong gust of wind blew from behind.
"Th-The fire!" Aqua panics as she looks around her surroundings looking for an object that can save this pitiful bonfire.
Her aqua blue eyes stares at the "recently washed tracksuit" of mine.
'Ohhhh, quit screwing around! What do you think are you gonna do to my only memento of Japan!?'
Expecting her to the something with my tracksuit, she just left it alone as she quickly pulled some weeds out, in desperation to keep the baby bonfire going.
'…..Huh? I'm pretty sure she was going to burn my only memento of Japan, just so she could get warm?' I feel a sense of déjà vu, as I imagined her burning my neatly folded tracksuit right in the spot.
"Ihhh~! I can't take it anymore! There's nothing else to burn!" She just shouts as tears start to form in her eyes.
"I found some wood Aqua." Feeling a little bit better due to her consideration for my tracksuit.
"Huh!? You call that wood!? You brought sticks not wood!" Aqua not satisfied with my bounty just gets mad at me.
"Technically, sticks are wood! And I would want to at least help that pitiful sight of a bonfire, to live much longer with my long, brown, and thick sticks!" Being irritated by the cold wind, I quickly put the long, thick, brown sticks to the baby bonfire.
My long, brown and thick sticks quickly became fuel for the only source of warmth me and Aqua have in this unpredictable winter.
But the long, brown, thick sticks I'm proud of, didn't make the fire bigger. And it only made Aqua's tantrum stronger.
"Ihhhh! If it comes to this! I'll burn my pajamas, just to get warmer!" She puts her faces near the bonfire, blowing it to at least make the fire stronger.
'….. Man, does this change has its perks.' A slight grin paints my face.
"And if it isn't enough, we're going to burn your adventure clothes Kazuma!" She screams as she points at me.
"… May Karma be with you." I wave my hand.
A powerful breeze passed through us, knocking out the kid bonfire.
"Whoa, wait!" Aqua runs to the dead bonfire, blowing it up to revive it. But to no avail, the baby bonfire rested in peace.
'He was so young!' Pity was all I felt toward the black charcoal than can be used again if I just chanted Tinder at it.
I just look at Aqua's form as she just cries at the ground. She suddenly turns around with the crying face I never liked so much.
"You hikiNEET! If you love me then. Warm me up! Warm me up more!" She shouts at me as her raiment just bounces around due to her crying.
That statement made my face burned a little, as warmth slowly enveloped my body. An idea popped in my head as I remembered the time when I was holding her hand in the festival.
Aqua just cries near the doused bonfire. Seeing this as my chance I quickly chanted Tinder to my entire body. I grabbed her from behind, doing a back hug while sitting down and crying to myself as I follow the cliché steps of those romance shananigans I always see.
"Hii!" Aqua just cutely squeaks in surprise.
"T-This w-warm enough for you!?" I try to shriek, to remove the embarrassment.
Aqua doesn't reply as her face resembled the color of a strawberry.
'I'll take that as a yes then.' I look away also resembling the strawberry's Aqua's resembling.
After a moment of Aqua getting used at the situation at hand. She adjusts herself to make herself comfortable in my embrace.
"It's still cold by the way." She playfully complains.
"You attention whore." I joked as I chanted Tinder at the dead bonfire. Reviving it from its death.
"You should exalt me more. All of you should praise me, praise me, and spoil me rotten" She moves her hands as she boasts.
"If your feats were that astounding, then the rewards, accolades, and DEBT are all yours!" I slowly pull out my hands off her.
"Pay off your debts on your own." I close my eyes as I try and stand up.
"Wait! I'm sorry!" She wraps my arms around her.
"I apologize for getting carried away, so don't abandon me!" She cries as she leans her body onto mine.
"Pfft! There's no way I'll abandon you…. Probably." I look away.
"Seriously, you need to take it easy with the debts nowadays." I weakly headbutted her.
"Hey! What does that mean!? And yes, these days I'm actually racking down my debts." She replies with a headbut in my chin.
"And your debts only decreased by a whopping 10 eris? That was what you're going to say?" I nonchalantly say my expectations.
"H-How did you know!?" She gasps.
"Meh, at least that's a start? I know everything about you Aqua." My voice trails out.
"From top, to bottom. Hehe!" A perverted grin escapes my lips.
"What does that mean!?" She quickly covers her chest.
After our usual "bonding" moment, our conversation finally had a serious topic.
"I don't think we're going to last any longer in that stable." My voice emitted seriousness as I saw the bonfire, burning from the big, brown, thick sticks I got being almost killed again, by the strong winter wind.
"I can tell." She nods knowingly.
"Just this morning… Just this morning… when I awoke in the straw of the stable my eyelashes were frozen solid! If we keep sleeping in that stable, we're going to freeze to death for sure!" A little sob came out of me, as I remembered something.
"Sui and Hikki, almost got frozen to death earlier! Even with your Shara water, I don't think they're going to survive this winter!" I imagine the pain of having a home being frozen solid.
"….." Sui and Hikki are not happily swimming. They're bowl only consisting of a snow hat, snow ear plugs and a winter scarf wrapped around their bowl.
"I don't think the winter clothes I bought for them, can help them survive." Aqua shakes her head in disbelief.
"You think!?"
With the winter hearing our complaints again, made the Karma strike again. The winter wind blew from behind us, as it murdered the pitiable bonfire again!
Witnessing this heart wrenching crime, Aqua cries in my chest in sadness and frustration. As I pat her aqua blue hair again and again, wanting her to stop.
'I need to be her strength here... I.. need to be strong..' A small tear flows down my face as I look down on the ground.
"We can't go on like this… We need to do something, and fast." I said in desperation to try and calm Aqua down, as I pat her head over and over.
-KO!-NO!-SU!-BA~-
THE NEXT DAY
Despite the winter showing off its freezing temperature throughout the city. Nature's power has its advantages, the townspeople can use. One, they can use this freezing temperature to dry their washed clothes. As me and Aqua walk to Wiz's shop, our eyes would see the rope used to dry clothes, tied through the roofs.
"Our party is still poorly balanced. But, at least I learned the Drain Touch from Wiz."
I look at Aqua.
"So cold…" She silently exclaims as she rubs her exposed arm.
'*Sigh* I am a responsible man.'
I offer her my cloak.
"Here, I'm not that cold anyway. And I don't want you to get sick again because of a lame-ass reason." I look away, remembering the Bitter Shark's sickness.
Aqua looks away, embarrassed. "Y-You don't have to give it to me. I know your cold so just use it-"
"Just wear it." I put my cloak around her shoulders, and quickly walked away.
I sneak a glance behind me, and our eyes looked at each other. She quickly looks away in response, as she followed suit.
"Oh, by the way you never told me why we're going to Wiz's place." She asks, as she looked at the shop's sign.
"You'll know soon enough."
*Creak!*
"Welcome. Ahhh, Kazuma-san and Aqua-sama." She smiles tenderly as we entered.
Aqua gives a weak glare to her, as she just signs and looks away.
'Is she grateful at least? For Wiz letting her stay here?' A weak wish escapes my thought.
"Can I have some tea and snacks here?" Aqua nonchalantly asks before sitting at a near table.
Wiz just gasps in surprise, and lets out a happy smile.
"Thank you, Aqua-sama." She smiles tenderly throughout her.
'….Is this actually an improvement towards Aqua's part? And why is Wiz even happy right now.' I signed in my mind.
I hit Aqua's head with my sword's container.
"Ouch! Why did you hit the woman you love!?" Aqua yelps as she holds her head.
"You really need to change that attitude towards Wiz. And I'm doing this because I love you." I said in a monotone. Aqua justs pouts as she rubs her head.
"Yo Wiz,… it's been a while." My expression turned dark, as I remembered our misunderstanding from last time.
Remembering her mistake, Wiz puts her head down in guilt.
-KO!-NO!-SU!-BA~-
Getting her freebies, Aqua then munches away.
"*munch* *munch* *munch* This is delicious." Aqua whispers in disbelief.
"Thank you, Aqua-sama." Wiz's bows her head.
I just slowly sip my tea with a sad expression in my face.
"I am really sorry for that time Kazuma-san." Wiz sadly apologizes to me.
'Hehe, all a part of my plan. Time to use this into my advantage.' I grin at my mind.
"Ahhh, Wiz can you help me with something- no, nevermind." I act sad.
"Yes! What do you want me to do? Kazuma-san!?" As expected, Wiz desperately wants her crimes to be forgiven by helping me.
"Ohhh, is that so? Thank you, Wiz." I smile at her.
"Why do you need her help, Kazuma?" She asks me a little irritated.
"Etooo, I want her to teach me the Cook skill."
"The Cook skill? Didn't you already knew it? You cooked me porridge right?" Aqua curiously asks.
"Well, yeah I did. The cook skill can also be self tutored but having it teach to you by a professional can instantly help you improve the level of that skill. By the way, I tasted the porridge after I fed you and the porridge was not even good." I explained to my love one.
"What do you mean?... It was delicious…" Aqua whispers to herself.
"What did you say?" I move my face closer to hers, her face reddening.
"Nothing, hikiNEET!" She pushes my face away.
'Why are you even mad?..' I am so not dense to even know that her face is red in anger and not in embarrassment.
"You really want me to teach you Kazuma san? I-I'm not that good in cooking." Wiz just shakes her head embarrassed, not wanting to believe the compliment is true.
"You really are a good cook, Wiz. This goddess already said so earlier." I pointed at Aqua.
"*munch* *munch* I didn't say that!... *munch*"
'You know I love you. *Sigh*'
"Well, I really am thankful for the compliment but why do you want to learn how to cook?" Wiz asked me curiously.
"Yes, why do you want to cook anyway Kazuma?! We can just always go eat in the guild."
I close my eyes, as a serious aura came over me.
"Do you not get why I want to learn how to cook?" I looked at Aqua seriously.
"Huh?"
"Debt!"
Aqua flails her arms in shock.
"I want to learn how to cook before we have a kitchen. And if we have the kitchen, I can at least help you lessen your debts by always cooking for you."
Silence engulfs the room. Aqua just munches her snacks with a little red in her face. And Wiz just covers her mouth, hiding the blush on her face.
'Was it something I said?'
"You don't need to go learn how to cook just for my sake you know." Aqua looks away.
"What's wrong with cooking for the one you love?" I nonchalantly said.
Aqua's face reddens even more as she puts her head down. Wiz's got worse too, almost to the point that she's going to faint.
'Again, was it something I said!?'
"Just go and cook already, hikiNEET!" She shoos me away.
"Yes, yes." I walk away to the kitchen, bringing the stunned Wiz with me.
'HikiNEET! Making me like this!' My body feeling great all over, warmth winning over the coldness, as I just hold his cloak.
" You're making it harder for me…." I complain, gripping his cloak lightly.
"Ohhhh, I see." I watched in full concentration, as Wiz shows me how to cook a fried toad.
"So, did you learn the skill yet Kazuma-san?" She wipes the sweat out of her forehead as she asks me.
"Yep, already learned it." I give her a thumbs up.
"But, do I already know the recipes on everything?"
"Yes, when the teacher already cooked it. Not only the skill will be transferred but also all the recipes that the teacher used will also be transferred." Wiz smiles.
"Ohhh! This is truly amazing! Let me try cooking a stir fried cabbage right now." I grab a flying cabbage in the cage.
'I don't think I have the guts for this.' I felt pity on the squirming flying cabbage on my hands.
"I think I don't want to cook a stir fried cabbage. I'm not in the mood for cabbage." I make up an excuse.
"Just going to make fried toad too. I think Aqua would like her nemesis cooked." I gingerly said as I focused on the task at hand.
Picking a toad meat in a shape of a chicken wing?, I clean the meat first using 'Create Water' and I started heating up the frying pan-
"You really do love Aqua-sama don't you?" Wiz suddenly blurts out.
Almost dropping the frying pan on the floor, I just continue my work as a slight blush appeared on my face.
"You might think I'm weird for falling in love with her. *Sigh* I can't believe it myself either, the instant I knew her, I immediately thought that she wasn't a heroine in my book. But, she's the whole reason why I became this happyand fulfilled in the first place. So there was really no choice, I fell in love the moment I realized that fact." I just explained as the room was filled with the sound of grilling.
"*Sigh* I really want to have that kind of romance too?" Wiz just smiles sweetly at herself.
"That would be hard to find…. Since-" I look at her boobs and returned to my task.
"Love would only be second to lust when it comes to loving you."
"K-Kazuma-san! Please, don't be like Verdia." I received a light slap on my cheek, as she hides her chest.
After a moment of silence, with my fried toad still grilling to perfection. Wiz asked me something.
"By the way, what do you want in a woman Kazuma-san?" Wiz asked me straight out, almost making me drop the grilling frying pan.
"A girl with cuteness all over her, has a very motherly personality, I'm not asking for a big body but I do want her to have some proportions on some parts, oh! and I've always wanted a girl who knew how to cook." I quickly and nonchalantly said.
"Ehhhh, is that so?" Wiz just smiles wryly.
'What's wrong with my fetishes!?'
"But even then, Aqua is still the best in my book. And I don't want her to change. I love her for who she is. Well, I try my best not to get angry at her." I say confidently.
And Wiz just smiles, with a blush on her face.
*Creak!* Wiz's shop door opens.
A middle aged man with his hat in his hand as he wipes his sweat with an hankerchief.
"Is Wiz-san here?"
-KO!-NO!-SU!-BA~-
The day is coming to an end, with the skies covered in a beautiful orange. My party and I stand at the front of the mansion.
*Gates Opening*
"This is the place?" A slight disbelief in my voice.
"Not bad! Yes, not bad at all!" Aqua nods in approvement. "This should be a fitting place for me to live!" With Sui and Hikki's bowl in my hands, they swim happily to see their new warm home.
"This was originally some aristocrat's villa, I hear." Megumin explains.
"But the landlord is certainly generous allowing us to live here as a reward if we can purify it." Darkness followed suit.
"Wiz is apparently known as a famous magician in our city, so people often bring cases like this to her." I explain to the audiences.
"With this, we can make it through the winter without worry! Like they say, "make the best of a bad situation. Nothing less from me!" She proudly states.
"But according to the landlord spirits reappear instantly, no matter how many times they're exorcised." I state the problem to party.
"Leave it to me! I'm a goddess and an arch priest! You could call me an anti-undead expert!" She closes her eyes and shoots her arms toward the mansion. Her arms emit a divine light, scanning the mansion for its past.
And we can just "oohh" impressed.
"I see it. I see it! There was a child born in this mansion to an aristocrat who made a move on his maid, partly in fun, and that illegitimate child was confined here."
And that slip-up was the only thing that made us not interested in the story.
"The aristocrat had a weak constitution, and when he died from illness, the mother of the illegitimate child went missing, as well."
Not wanting to hear more the five of us (including Sui and Hikki) walk to the mansion.
"The girl remained in the mansion and succumbed to the same illness as her father, passing away at a young age lonely and alone, without ever knowing her parents' faces.-"
"I really want to ask how you know the setting in such detail…"
With the night owls starting to wake up, one by one. We continuously cleaned the mansion.
"Pheeew~" Megumin sighs in relief as she wipes off her sweat.
"That'll take care of the cleaning for now." I report to my fellow party.
"We've decided the room arrangements, and we've carried in our luggage, so all that's left is to wait for nighttime." Darkness exclaimed.
I open the window to get some fresh air. "No surprise that it's a little dusty… Huh?"
"The girl's name was Anna Filante Estheroid. Her favorite things were stuffed dolls and tales of adventurers' journeys. But don't worry. This spirit is not a bad girl." She springs up in delight. "She maybe a child, but she appears to like things that are a bit grown-up. She enjoys sweet, hard drinks-"
Not wanting to hear more, I just slowly close the window. I turned around and tenderly smiled to my party.
"Okay, everyone's free to do as they please from now on. Call out as soon as an evil spirit shows up. Dismissed!" I saluted to them as I quickly went to my room, wanting to fix my furniture.
'Man, is my luck the best.' I laughed as I walk through the mansion.
"I can't wait to sleep in a bed-" On the way, I spotted the room Aqua's assigned on.
Wondering how it looks like, I took a little peek.
'Woah, is this room nice.' My eyes impressed with the sight of a Canopy bed. The kinds which people with high positions, sleep in.
"This is so Aqua. I can't sleep in this kind of bed." I slight chuckle escapes.
I walk inside, my feet marks my every step in the dusty floor, visible cobwebs in the corners of the room, and the bed's sheet has little blood stain in the center.
'….. Is it wrong to have a dirty mind?' My thoughts were interrupted by a cough shot out by my healthy lungs due to the dustiness of this room.
I walk towards the window to, wanting some fresh air to come in. "God, Aqua needs to clean up this room-"
And opening it I still see Aqua investigating the mansion's past with a sweet smile in her face. With the sun already down, the winter night sky slowly showed its colors.
"… I hate myself." I leave the room, with a slightly irritated face.
"So, then with her mind still having regrets. Anna never moved on, and just possessed a stuffed doll. Eagerly waiting for visitors, to tell her adventure stories." With the last detail out of my mouth, my eyes opened.
"Huh? Where did everyone go!?" I shout, a little bit irritated for them leaving me outside. With the cold night wind, passing through my shoulders and my back aching from my packed items-
'…..Huh?' I was fully expecting that my back would feel bad from the weight, and my skin shivering from the cold wind from above. But, my back's not aching and I don't feel that cold anyway.
A familiar feeling touches my arms, as the winter wind tries to defeat the warmth of this item.
"….HikiNEET.." I just hug the cloth as that hikiNEET's cloak protects me from the cold.
My hug tightens as I felt my back. The back that should be aching from the weight of my heavy backpack, instead it's aching from the warmth that hikiNEET's doing to my body.
"Ihhh! I'm going to God Blow that hikiNEET!" I run to the mansion as I shout.
I quickly entered the first door I saw in the mansion. My eyes quickly saw the neatness and cleanliness of this room. The floor not dusty, no cobwebs, the bed of the sheets clean and ready for taking. Not to mention the bed!
"Hehe! This bed is worthy to be used by a powerful goddess like me." I patted the bed with respect.
I looked around, wanting to know who's room is this. I notice Sui and Hikki beside the bed, happily swimming at their bowl. A little smile forms in my face, noticing a paper beside their bowl, I picked it up.
"Sui and Hikki's Visit Schedule: Monday to Thursday (Aqua's room) Friday to Sunday (Kazuma's room)"
'Monday is today… So they're in my room?' I look at them. Nodding their heads as if they knew what I'm thinking.
"Wait… This is my room?" My eyes widened in shock.
'I haven't cleaned my room up yet. And this room, obviously was only just cleaned right now… Did the spirits do this?'
No way Megumin and Darkness would clean my room…..
I lay in my bed in disbelief.
"Kazuma…" My goddess heart, god blowing through my body. As the cloak makes me drowsy.
"HikiNEET! What have you done to me!?" I thrash around my bed.
"…You're really making it hard for me you know?.." Sadness overcame in my voice, as I hug a nearby pillow.
I lay in my bed in happiness.
"This is great! Having my own room is a wonderful thing!" With the exhaustion of cleaning my room and Aqua's room, my body was deeply fatigued.
'I'm sure the evil spirits will be gone by morning. Knowing Aqua, she isn't the type to let evil spirits do whatever they like in her own house. She is an arch priest and goddess, after all.'
My eyelids slowly closes, little, by little, by little-
"Ahhhh~! Ahhh~!" A loud shot echoes throughout the walls.
"What!?" Immediately knowing that voice, I spring out off my bed and into her room.
"What's wrong!? Hey, Aqua, what happened!? Are you all right!?" Worry came over my body as I saw her sitting in the ground, crying sadly.
'Tch! I was too late!' I grit my teeth in anger.
"*Sobs* *Sobs* Kazuma!" She turns around, and in her hands an alcohol bottle.
"...Hey." I blankly look at her.
"This is super expensive alcohol that I've been saving." She rubs the bottle on her cheeks. " I was looking forward to taking leisurely sips of it after my bath..." She then cries on the floor. "But when I came back to my room, as you can see, it was empty!"
"I , you tomorrow." I wanted to leave quickly as my body is filled with exhaustion for loving this goddess.
"This is the work of the evil spirits!" She regains her ground. "I'm going to go look around the mansion and strike down any spirits that catch my eye!" She stands up with anger in her voice.
'Well, goodluck with that.' *Yawn*
"And you're coming with me Kazuma!" Aqua pulls my hand as she runs toward the mansion.
"Ehhhh!?" And I can only follow in shock.
"Show yourselves!" Aqua screams as we run towards the darkness.
'*Sigh~~~~~!* If I didn' love you, I would have shoved your hand away!' I just curse in my mind as I have no choice.
Aqua proceeds to exorcise every little thing that seems to be possessed. Like those chairs emmiting a some sort of dark aura.
"Turn Undead! Turn Undead! Turn Undead!"
Like those closets that seem to be moving on their own.
"Turn Undead! Turn Undead!"
And I can only just follow to her exorcism. Like an altar boy assisting a priest-
"Nature's Beauty!"
*fwoop!*
"What are you doing!? Don't point that at me!"
She smiles for a moment, but instantly regaining her anger she continues to exorcise. We enter one of the basement rooms of the mansion. Aqua finally let's go of my hand as she exorcises a somesort of overgrown toothbrush? or something? It's pretty pink, and even has a switch in it-?
"Turn Undead! Turn Undead! Turn Undead!" Spirits keeps flowing out of the mansion as Aqua chants again and again.
'Agh, no good... My eyelids are heavy...' With the exhaustion hitting me, I try to stay awake.
My eyelids slowly drop, and I just hug my knees for support.
"Well, I can just sleep... Aqua's just chanting away nearby.." After mumbling to myself, I let my eyelids drop. Falling asleep almost instantly.
*Hoot!* *Hoot!*
My body squirms from the position I've been sleeping in. I slowly open my eyes half lit as I see the moonlight bathing me.
'I gotta go the bathroom.' I weakly thought to myself, as I turned around.
...Only to see a stuffed doll sitting on a chair, staring at me. I quickly turned around in fear.
"Whoa, scary!"
Wait, was there a doll like that in this room!?
"It can't be! A cliched development like this can't be happening!" I close my eyes in fear.
Feeling something getting closer, I desperately closed my eyes.
"HIH!" I feel something in my body.
'Don't open my eyes! The characters in horror movies who do, are always the first one to be killed!' I will survive~!
... I open my eyes.
"AGH!" My body is surrounded with these Chuckies!
"Hiyaaaaaah!" I run to Aqua's room. "Aqua! Aqua-sama!" I run for my life.
"Scary! Scary! This is super scary!?"
"Hih! Hih! Hih!" The dolls let out a horrifying laugh.
'How are you guys flying!?'
Finally seeing Aqua's room, I quickly grabbed the door knob and went inside. "Aqua! Save m-"
Crimson eyes stares at me in the dark.
"Hiyahhhhhh!" "Aghhhhhh!" We both scream in shock.
"Don't scare me like that, Megumin! I nearly peed myself." Relief in my voice.
"I'm the one who should be saying that!" With a slight blush on her face she sits relaxed, in Aqua's bed.
"Why did you come barging into this room? I thought Aqua was coming back."
'Cute- No, I love Aqua.'
"I could ask you the same. Why are you in Aqua's room?"
"Eh? Well, there were dolls moving around all over the place..." She shakes her body a little.
"So, um, I was going to have Aqua protect me... and thought we could go to the bathroom together." She mutters the last part embarassed.
'You too?' I need to pee.
"Aqua's probably still out exorcising spirits in the mansion, isn't she?"
"Is she? I'm sure Darkness is with her, then."
"Heh..." Darkness's body filled with pure, wetting, ecstasy, as she searches for more murderous possessed dolls. Holding a mop, as a weapon.
"Yeah, despite how she is, she's a crusader." ...I need to pee.
I look at Sui and Hikki's bowl. A stuffed doll is currently drowning in their water right now. With Sui fighting it off, and Hikki hiding behind the corals. ...I need to pee.
'I feel you, Hikki-' Feeling something tingling in my under. I try to hold on. ...I need to pee.
Seeing the veranda, I walk towards it. I need to pee.
"Hey, Megumin, look over there and cover your ears for a minute. I'm going to your veranda for a-" I stop in my tracks, as I feel someone tugging on my tracksuit. ...I need to pee.
"Hey, what are you doing? Let go. If you don't, my pants and the carpet in this room are going to be in big trouble."
'Hey, carpet do you know... I really need to pee.'
" I won't let you. How can you try to relieve yourself alone?" She looks up at me. With a happy tone in her voice. "Wherever we go, bathroom or otherwise, we go together." She gives a beaming smile.
I try to get out of her grip. "Let go! Don't emphasize our bond as allies only at times like this!" Megumin quickly clinged to me. I should be feeling ecstasy right now, but hell no! "Didn't you say crimson demons don't use the bathroom?! If you want, there's an empty bottle lying over there!" I point at Aqua's empty bottle.
'I think it will spill though, but I don't care! ...I need to pee.'
Megumin looks up with a tomato colored face."You just blurted out something outrageous! "Now, do it! Give it a try! Go pee!" What are you suggesting I do with that empty bottle?!"
'What the hell!?' A bad bad thought entered my mind, but I shake it away since I love someone else! By the way, ...I need to pee.
Megumin finally let's go and misunderstands me as a man who'll molest her.
"I won't let you!" She shows out a fighting pose...And I follow suit. "I can at least shake you behind while you're taking of your business-" Her face darkens as she looks behind me.
"Eh?" I slowly turn around.
... Multiple eyes with different colors stare at us, outside the veranda and the dolls attempting too break the veranda open.
... I quickly removed the stuffed doll in Sui and Hikki's bowl, and ran to the the door, and Megumin followed suit.
"AGHHHHHHHH!" "AGHHHHHH!"
...I need to pee.
KONOSUBAAAAA!
I try to catch my breath to all the the exhaustion I've been doing this day. My body clearly tired, I just rest Sui and Hikki's bowl at a table nearby.
"Kazuma, are you there?" Megumin asks at the other side of the bathroom door.
"I'm here!" "Are you really there?" "I am here!"... "You're really, really there for me right?"
'Oh come on!'
"I'm here!" Aghhhh, I jog to try and lessen the build up... I need to pee by the way.
"I'm right here, and I won't leave you, so hurry up and go!" I jog.
..."Um, this is a little embarassing, so could you sing a song or something in a loud voice?"
'Oh, really?'
"Why do I have to sing in the middle of the night, in front of a bathroom!?"
There it is again... That creepy feeling that you're being watched... I slowly turned around mortified.
The stuffed dolls heads perk up in the wall. Staring at me...
I bang the door. "Hey Megumin, hurry up!" "Please don't rush me like that! I know you're in a tough spot, too!"
The dolls move slowly... towards me!
"It's true that both our bladders are in a tough spot but we've got a bigger problem closing in!" I continue banging the door. "I can't go if you rush me like that!"
'Aghhhhh! I need to sing!' The dolls come closer and closer.
"A used-up goddess is being transported along~! I'm sure they're taking me away to be sold~!" I sing the song that came up to my mind.
..." Pffft! Hahaha! Kazuma, why did you choose that song! You really love Aqua!" She laughs at the other side of the door.
"Grrrr! Now go pee! I already sang!" A little embarassed by what I did.
"I really can't go when you're rushing me like that!"
The dolls only a few meters left towards me. "It's no good!" Having no choice, I desperately try to open the door knob. "I can't wait any longer!" Finally opening the door, I see Megumin calmly sitting in the toilet seat. "AGHHHHHHHHH!~" She screams in embarassment. I close my eyes and grabbed her hand. "Hurry!" Not bothering to get Megumin's pajama pants, and ...undies.
'I need to see Aqua's first-!' What the hell am I thinking!?
I quickly took Hikki and Sui's bowl and proceeded to run towards the basement room I was before.
"How can anyone have so little common sense?!"
'Tell that to your suicide move!'
"You at least got halfway through, so you're fine!" I look at how Sui and Hikki are doing, doing my best to not rattle their water so much.
"What are you talking about? Crimson demons don't use the bathroom."
"You're saying that now!? I'm already at my limit here!"... I need to pee.
Reaching the door knob, me and Megumin. Oh, don't also forget Sui and Hikki. We enter the basement room.
Hearing evil giggles and horrifying laughing just outside, me and Megumin. And also Sui and Hikki, huddle together.
"I can't hold it anymore." I look around the basement room... 'Agh, no good! The only thing that I can pee on is-' I look at Sui and Hikki's bowl.
Our eyes meet, I see them staring at me like in disbelief or so. They quickly shake their heads to not pee on their delicious Shara Water.
"At this point, I'd sooner use the bowl..." Teasing them a little, the 2 goldfish swam in panic.
'No way, I'll do that... Probably.'
"Darkness blacker than black and darker than dark," I widen my eyes in shock. "I beseech thee, combine with my deep crimson." Not wanting her to blow away our heaven, I quickly covered her mouth.
"What are you chanting? You want to blow away this mansion along with them?!"
*Bang!* *Bang!* *Bang!* The door shake from the sheer force from the other side.
In fear, I look at Sui and Hikki. They just look at the banging door, clearly scared from it. Fear quickly escapes my body, and was replaced of the power of fathers!
"Damn... We'll just have to go for it!" I grab Sui and Hikki's bowl, they both look at me in response. I just smile at them.
"Don't worry, I'll protect you guys." Hearing those words they swam happily in response. "Megumin, take Sui and Hikki! Once I open the door, run! I'll use the Drain Touch skill I just learned and absorb the magic of as many dolls as I can!"
Taking one more look at my goldfishs-, our goldfishs, I unlock the door.
'For Aqua!'
"Bring it on, you evil spirits! I'll sic MY goddess on you all later, damn it!" I quickly opened the door... *CLANK!* Only for it to stop midway.
"Eh?" "Huh" Me and Megumin asked dumbfounded.
"Ahh...Ahh...Ahhh" Aqua in the ground with the stuffed dolls, groans painfully knocked out, her forehead showing off steam. And I just stare, shocked. "H-Hey, Aqua, are you all right?" Darkness asked worried. Sui and Hikki looked worriedly.
"AQUAAAAAA!~" I quickly walk to her, getting on all fours puckered up my lips, and going in for the-
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING KAZUMA!?" The 2 members of my party, screamed in shock to what I'm doing right now.
"It's CPR!" I shout, as I close in again.
"She doesn't need CPR! She needs rest!" They hold me back.
"In my country, CPR is always the medicine for every disease!" I fight back, knowing this is a once-in-a-lifetime chance.
"That's called sexual harassment!" They pull me away.
'Tch, I was so close!' A little bit dissapointment.
"I was just joking, Megumin please take Sui and Hikki back to Aqua's room. Darkness, can you get me a towel and also a bucket of water?" Seriously worried now, I command my party members.
They were shocked for a moment, then nods and took off to do their tasks. I look at Aqua...
"Ahhh... Ahhh. Ahhh." She still groans in pain.
"Damn, I'm sorry Aqua." I seriously apologized to her as I just click my tongue for my mistake.
I carried her bridal style, the familiar weight of a pony hits my arms, the perfume coming out from the woman I hold dear, engulfs my nose. I slowly walk towards her room, avoiding the stuffed dolls on the floor.
A slight smile appears on my loved ones face... And the words just escaped my mouth, as I move her closer. "I love you, goddess Aqua."
After a few steps, I remembered something important.
'I...NEED...TO...PEEEEEEEE!'
KONOSUBA! Yay! Yay!
After declining the special award from the big boobed secretary, me and Aqua head home. Me, a little disappointment from not getting the reward but I can't accept it because of a thing callked "morals".
"Uhhh~" Aqua groans, as she holds an ice pack in her forehead.
"I'm really sorry for hitting you, Aqua. It was an accident... It's also your fault." I looked slightly away.
"If you just shouted at us from the other side, I wouldn't have opened the door like that..."
"Huh!? I just saved you, and this is how you thank me!? HikiNeet!" She crosses her arm, as she looks away.
'It's still her fault though.' I am a little bit guilty.
She avoids me for a while...
"Oyyyy, it hurts actually hurts me a little, if you're avoiding me like that." I say nonchalantly but a little sweetness into it.
Her face slightly reddens, as she looks at me.
"Why did you even charge in the first place!?" She shouts, demanding an explanation.
I scratch my cheek.
"Well, Sui and Hikki were really scared at that time. So I wanted to protect them." I look at Aqua in the eye. "I wanted to protect them for you, no. For us." A slight smile corrupts my face.
"Eh?..." Noticing our faces close distance, Aqua's face resembled the lights of a christmas tree, as her ice pack melted faster. Seeing on how she's acting right now, my face followed suit.
"Is there anyway I can repay you?" I asked a little bit embarrassed.
She doesn't reply, and after a moment holds her hand towards me. She doesn't look at my direction.
I grin. "What do I do with that?" I asked her in a mocking voice. "It's cold, you hikiNEET! Just hold my han-!" Before she finishes, I quickly held her hand.
I chanted Tinder, for her. With her ice pack completely dried, she just proceeds to walk towards our home. As only a few more meters toward our mansion, I quickly talked to her.
"Hey Aqua..."
"...What?" She looks to me, a tint of red in her face.
"Ai-shi-teru."
"Ihhhhh!" She throws the ice pack that is a water pack right now, at my face.
"HikiNEET!" She screams as she runs to the mansion. And I just rub the cheek, she hit on as I just sighed from love.
KONOSUBA!
I put the stuffed doll to Anna Filante Estheroid's gravestone. And I proceeded to wipe her gravestone clean. With Wiz watching me from the back.
'I want to be at least thankful, for making us live here Ana.'
"I thought for sure it was all Aqua's wild delusion. Who would have thought it was all true?"
"Kazuma-san." Wiz calls me from behind. "Hello. Are you cleaning the gravestone?"
'Obviously.' A slight smile in my face.
"Isn't it great that you've been allowed to live here?"
"It's a life-safer that the landlord here is such a nice person. We caused you a lot of trouble, too, Wiz."
"No, no. I personally think this was for the best. I'm sure she won't be lonely anymore." Wiz smiles happily.
"I'm sure." I agree with her. I clap my hands together. "I'm begging you please don't cause any more mischief" I pray to Ana.
"Well, I need to tend the shop, I'll be heading back for the day. Say hello to the others for me." She bows.
"Yeah, thanks for coming." Wiz's proceeds to walk away.
'And speak of the goddess.'
"Kazuma! Dinner's ready, so hurry back!" I hear the goddess shout. I stand up with satisfaction. "If you don't, your long awaited lunch will get cold!"
'With this, I finally obtained the down-to-earth lifestyle I most desired.'
"Got it. I'm on my way!" A little grin came over me. "Thanks honey!"
"Ihhhhh! HikiNEET!"
'Hehe, yeah this is the lifestyle I most desired in my life.'
"Aqua, we're out of firewood for the fireplace." Darkness asks Aqua.
"Oh,... then toss my pajamas, and if it's not enough." Pause for dramatic effect. " Then toss "Darling's" tracksuit over there onto the fire!"
I flail my arms in shock! "Don't! I told you, don't try to burn my precious memories!" I quickly run back to the mansion. Towards the party who I can confidently, my family. Oh, and don't forget Sui and Hikki!
Chapter 12 END!
A/N: Pheeewww~ Finally finished! Doing my best to keep up with my plots and my tests, so sorry for the slight delay! And actually starting from this chapter, I will make my plots fuse with the anime's episodes. Planning 2 more chapters for ending the Season 1 plot. Thank you for reading! Please, review if you think this change is great or not. Would really appreciate it! I love reviews, especially the ones who like my story so far! I love you guys!... Not in a gay way. Hehe, well Raguna14 signing out! See you in the next chapter! Oh for info, already have a plot for Season 2's episode 1! That episode was really hilarious! I love KonoSuba!