When it came to Marinette, she has always wanted to feel loved.

She has always believed that love is woven into every person, it is a marker that identifies us, it is the reason for our happiness, and the reason we're connected. It is the only thing that linked heaven and the underworld together. It makes us greedy and selfless at the same time, it makes us feel both; free and trapped. Love makes us cruel yet so compassionate and kind. We're both the best and worst versions of ourselves when we're in love.

When Marinette fell in love with Adrien, she felt like the luckiest person alive to be so deeply in love with the most flawless breathing creature on earth. She had always wondered how she fell in love with someone whose differences complimented hers. Normally, differences are what tear people apart, but in their case, it only pushed them together. At some point, it was beautiful how they discovered their unfamiliarities and managed to fit them together to form a delightful wreckage of chaos that filled impeccably between the cracks of their hearts.

But Marinette never imagined that love could fade.

Maybe her definition of love has changed.

Maybe the way she viewed Adrien has changed.

Maybe it was too complicated between Adrien and her.

Maybe she wanted to feel loved again.

And oh how she wanted to feel that love again.

That's why Marinette was currently regretting going on that date with Luka.

Was she thinking selfishly and using Luka to feel something again? Yes.

Did she feel guilty about it? Definitely.

Did that stop her? Unfortunately, it didn't.

All she was thinking about when she accepted going with Luka was the fact that she was going on a date. Adrien has neglected her enough. He never complimented her, he never even hugged her, the romance was long gone, and she was attached to a loveless marriage, void of affection and warmth, living on a string of hope that it will end.

She knew that Luka will make her feel like a queen, he would appreciate her, love her, and treasure her. Luka looked at her with an expression that radiated with love. Just like Adrien used to look at her. And here she was, comparing every action to her husband's past actions and choosing Adrien's every single time.

But it was all useless. The date was useless. Luka is married to Chloe and they're happy together. Choosing Adrien was useless, because Adrien doesn't love her anymore, and they're unhappily married.

All of that nonsense found Marinette dragging herself to school. She was barely awake and didn't want to continue this time Akuma fiasco.

Turned out she wasn't the only one feeling horrible, Adrien looked like he hadn't slept in weeks. His eyes were bloodshot red and puffy, his hair was mess as if he hasn't brushed it in days, and his face was pale. She was sure that Gabriel wouldn't have let him go out wearing that outfit. Adrien was never allowed to go out with sweatpants and a hoodie.
There was definitely something wrong going on. She knew her husband well, and she knew how he looked at his most vulnerable points. She knew how he looked like after a breakdown, and this is exactly how he does. Marinette thought about approaching him, she wanted to know what was wrong. There was still this overprotectiveness that unconsciously lives within her.

But she hesitated, she knew he wouldn't tell her, he wouldn't open up to her, and he'll push her away. She couldn't remember the last time she communicated with her husband or had a proper conversation with him. The honest Adrien had disappeared long ago, he lives inside a bubble in his own misery and never lets anyone in. He never opened up, never tried, and never wanted to. She tried to get in there to save him but he never let her so she gave up and soon found herself giving up on their marriage.

So she decided to continue her day normally, listened to old, useless lectures from her teachers, and left Adrien alone.

Lunchtime rolled by and she was starving, she was heading back home to enjoy her mother's delicious meal-which was probably the only thing she enjoyed with the whole time travel Akuma mess- when she remembered that Adrien might be heading home to eat lonely on a cold table.

Marinette hurried to the locker room to see if he was there. Maybe he would want to join her. She knew he loved her mother's meals. He looked distressed today, maybe it would make him feel better. It's not like she's asking him to talk about it. She didn't need an excuse to make her husband feel a bit better? Right?

She would try her luck and ask him, there was a big chance his answer was no but-

"Hey Kagami?" she heard him and her mind stopped functioning.

"Are you free today? I- I need to see you."

Of course, Marinette should've known. Adrien was longing for Kagami. She suspected that he was seeing her again, but was never sure. She couldn't blame him though, but she couldn't accept it. Kagami was great, confident, attractive and fun. Adrien enjoyed himself in her company. She has always been a bit jealous of the ice queen and pushed her insecurities away, but they're coming back to haunt her and eat her alive.

Adrien had broken up with Kagami a week before the reveal. He had confessed to her superhero self that he had been in a relationship but didn't really move on from loving ladybug, which was the reason he ended things with Kagami. After the reveal, Adrien confessed to her and the rest was history. When Kagami found out that Marinette started dating her ex-boyfriend not a week after their breakup, she cut Adrien and Marinette off and they never saw her again. So Marinette wouldn't be surprised if Kagami tried to make her way into Adrien's life again and take her chance with him especially if she knew about his struggle with his wife.

Kagami was a kind person, but she's tough and competitive-which was strangely attractive. If you win one time, she'll make sure she takes all the other trophies life offers you. Luka was different, he was kindhearted and understanding, he had supported Marinette when she told him about Adrien and told her to follow her heart. Luka accepts his heartbreak but turns it into beautiful music until it's nothing but art, he moves on and follows his emotions. He doesn't compete but he assists and encourages. He even made Chloe a better person and that speaks mountains.

Marinette ran to her house and didn't bother to hear the conversation her husband was having. She didn't need to know. If he's feeling down, Kagami would be there for him, she's not going to try anymore.

While in the school's locker room, her husband was having another problem. He was questioning life and remembering the reason he couldn't bring himself to continue with Kagami.

Kagami was busy. She had her own life and tried her best to care for him but it never worked out, she tried so hard to show her feelings but the outcome was an awkward "I love you" or a hug that made Adrien feel like he's hugging a frozen statue. She was bold but he never felt the love out of her empty kisses. While he wanted to talk with her deeply about life, all he got was discussions about fencing teams. When he wanted a romantic date on a Sunday morning, all he got was an appointment at her house or a fencing match.
But all these formalities made Adrien sick. He respected her so much but she simply wasn't the one for him.

Marinette was different, she was home. He felt the love radiating from her eyes with just one glance of hers. She used to look at him with a fond expression that made him melt into a puddle right next to her. Marinette's kisses weren't simple kisses that made his body react, but they were fire that made his heart and mind and every cell in his body go wild. She offered him lessons about life and love and made him gifts to cheer him up whenever he was feeling blue.

That Marinette was never coming back. She gave up on him long ago. He pushed her away dealing with his own hectic life and didn't realize it until it was too late. He realized it when their life became a bundle of hatred, loath, and animosity. It became a way of living that they were too attached to and couldn't stop. He realized it when they were over.
There he was, disappointed from Kagami's "Adrien, I'll see you next week. I'm so busy. Bye love u." message and sitting on the ground of the school's corner so he wouldn't be seen. He didn't want to go back home nor see Marinette or his dad or anyone. He wished their past selves, wherever they are, solve this mess right this moment so he would find himself in his room and go back to the way he was dealing with life.

Adrien's 17-year-old body was fragile and delicate. It felt all the hits life through at him and felt them hard. Adrien's whole life crisis that he had been doing so well to ignore was coming back at him and he was too weak to defend himself. So he found himself feeling every stab, every ache, and every punch. Tears slipped their way into his cheeks and he found himself dealing with them again.

Marinette finished her lunch and headed back to school. She overthought about her case with Adrien, assuming he still has feelings for Kagami because of what she overheard. She made a few decisions. As soon as she goes back to the future, she's getting done with Adrien, even though it hurts like hell but it was for the better, for him and her.
All these choices went blank when she saw Adrien. Her heart dropped at the sight. Her husband has shouted, screamed, and yelled, but she never saw him like this. He used to have breakdowns next to her and let her hold him, but she couldn't remember the last time she saw him cry. Whenever she got a glimpse of tears in his eyes, he would rush to his room and never let her in. So seeing Adrien's shaking shoulders, breathless sobs, and reddening face were enough for Marinette to completely forget all about their strained relationship.

She did not think twice when she approached him this time. She knew she shouldn't care, but this tiny hope that he might talk to her this time was pushing her against her will and throwing her right next to Adrien without her realizing it.

His face was buried on his knees when she touched his soft hair and muttered his name.

He jumped instantly as if her touch had burned him, he flinched when he saw her face. Marinette was used to this. Disappointment clear on his face. He didn't want her here.

"Go away," he said.

"Adrien, what's going on?"

There she was, with her practiced concerned expressions and worried voice. Adrien promised himself he'd never fall for her trained act again. She played him once and then decided to throw him like a useless and hopeless piece of garbage to drift alone in the wind. He's not believing her again.

"Go away." He repeats, but she didn't move.

Her eyes were still fixated on him and her frown was only deepening. Marinette was stubborn and this time she wasn't going to let him escape again. She trapped him in her cage and wasn't going to set him free until he explains to her what happened.

"Are you deaf? I told you to leave." Adrien all but yelled.

"I'm not going to until you tell me what happened." She insisted.

"God" he muttered. "Get lost Marinette. I don't want you here." His voice started to get higher and she didn't want that to happen. She was stupid to think that he will open up to her or talk to her about anything.

Marinette lost it.

"You know what Adrien? I'm trying my best here. I even wanted to invite you for lunch but you were so busy talking to that…that bitch." She cried. "I tried so hard to talk to you and get you to speak to me but you don't!"

"I'm tired, Adrien. Stop whining like a baby and get yourself together and talk about it like a grown man. You're hurting yourself and you hurt me every single day." She continued.

Marinette could feel her heart burn. Her face felt so warm and her hands were starting to shake. "I don't want to solve things between us Adrien" she whispered. "I'm very aware you don't want anything to do with me anymore. I can't see you hurting yourself and act like nothing is wrong anymore."

She felt tired and her knees started to hurt, she slowly moved toward him and slid on the wall to sit next to her distraught husband.

Adrien, who was staring numbly at some space in front of him, mumbled, "I can't go to class."

"Me neither"

"G-go home Marinette."

She stood up. "You too."

Adrien was still lost in thought. "I'll think I'm going to stay here."

"Why not?" Marinette looked at him confused.

He seemed conflicted. As if he doesn't know what to do. He was silent for a while and she waited for him because she knew he was thinking of an answer.

"I don't want to see him again."

It was a simple sentence. It wouldn't mean a thing to anyone, but for them, it was enough to shake mountains of emotion and make them both shudder.

She looked at her husband, her former superhero partner, who was once the bravest of them all and the strongest. The usually so full of pride hero trembled like a leaf next to her and all that was because of him.

She was not going to allow it to happen.

"Come to my house." She suggested hopefully.

But all he did was chuckle. "No."

"Adrien. You obviously don't want to go back there. And you know my parents don't mind."

"I'm sure they would." He said sarcastically.

She huffed. "Do I need to remind you that they almost adopted you when we were engaged?"

He smiled at the memory. He wasn't looking at her but she saw his smile and it was enough to light up the hope in her. Marinette knew her husband and knew exactly how to convince him.

"fine." She almost sounded like Chloe. "Mamman made chicken with cashew nuts today, you know. You're favorite Chinese dish today." She smirked when she saw him look at her.
"It wouldn't be so bad sitting here while I enjoy eating mamman's food, would it now?"

1, 2, 3, and he groaned.

"Stop smiling Marinette. It's not funny." He glared at her.

"I know that you're hungry. Don't deny it"

That's how Marinette found herself walking with Adrien home. They say that if you want a cat to trust you, feed it. And Marinette had plenty of food to feed her kitty.

The walk home was silent and awkward. That was the first conversation they've had in months without ending up in separate rooms and wishing they have never met.

Marinette's words are still ringing in his ears. She said she didn't want to fix things between them, but still, at least she showed a bit of her care.

He wasn't sure why he accepted her proposal. He was hungry but it wasn't the reason, but it was like a push of a finger on a wall that was ready to fall anyway. In reality, it was senseless to reject her offer. He did not want to go to the mansion and deal with his dad. Marinette's house made him feel warm and happy and important. So he accepted.

The bakery smelled heavenly. It smelled like a mix of cake, chocolate, tarts, cinnamon rolls, and cookies. The sweet smell itself left Adrien feeling way more relaxed. The bakery felt like home since day one. Marinette's parents welcomed him and treated him as their own son, they took care of him, loved him, fed him, and most importantly; considered him family. Even when they knew about his and their daughter's struggle, they never stopped showing him love and always tried to be supportive and give advice.

Even in this time zone, where they had no idea he had married their only daughter, they were welcoming. Sabine's smile reached her ears when she saw Adrien walking behind Marinette, and her husband offered him freshly baked cookies and called him 'son'.

Their thoughtful gestures warmed his heart, and he felt at ease again.

He didn't feel nervous when he entered her room, he hasn't seen it in a year or so because he had been so busy with the disaster his father had left him to deal with. Adrien still didn't glance at Marinette, not even once, although he could sense her looking at him every minute or so. They sat silently, she reading a book while he only stared at her wall.

It was 7 pm when he realized that Nathalie had called him so many times while his phone was off. Marinette checked her phone and found out that Gabriel was going crazy and demanding to find his son.

"You can sleep over if you want to." Marinette proposed.

Adrien raised her eyebrows at her suggestion.

"I mean. My parents won't mind. It's not like you never slept here before and I'll just sleep in the guest room or the chaise, it's not like we sleep together anyway. And if you don't want to go see him then you shouldn't it's up to you actually-"

Adrien cut her off, "Marinette you're rambling."

He almost forgot how cute she was when she got all nervous and flustered. Marinette barely rambled anymore, she spits every word carefully to cut him deep inside. Memories were flashing inside his head of the times where she used to stammer, stutter, and flush when he was around. It was cute.

"I-I don't think I can. He wouldn't let me."

"It doesn't matter. This Akuma's time will surely run out." Words spilled out of her mouth without realizing and then she found herself being stared at by a very shocked Adrien.
Adrien, unmoving for a few seconds, only staring at her. He suddenly burst out laughing and clutching tight at his stomach.

Adrien was laughing.

He was laughing.

She made him laugh.

She hasn't heard him laugh in so long that she couldn't even remember how it sounded like.

All she wanted to do was treasure this sound in her heart and bury it deep inside her, she'd remember it when she's feeling down and it will put a smile on her face.

Marinette shook her head. What the hell? What was she thinking? She's getting a divorce in a few days.

"Did you really just pun…? I can't believe my ears. I actually laughed at this, oh god..." he said breathlessly.

"Yes, you laughed. It's endearing."

Adrien quickly cleared his throat and blushed. "I-I'll talk to Nathalie. I'll just tell her I'm not going back today and shut off my phone."

"Okay"

And so he did.

It was Marinette who talked first.

"Adrien?"

"hm?"

"What's wrong?"

"I told you not to ask."

"Don't get all rude to me again. Don't you think we should talk a bit? We haven't had a discussion in months."

He sighed.

He could feel Marinette trying to lighten the mood, which was unusual. he wasn't sure what happened to her but decided to ignore it for now. at least he wasn't a puddle of tears anymore.

he never told Marinette about anything before. but he needed to talk to someone. it wouldn't be bad to trust her a bit again, would it?