"I didn't know if I could use magic on him or even move him", said Minerva, kneeling beside him. "I got angry, please don't ask me questions. He hurt his head."

Poppy placed a hand on his forehead. "He's burning up." She turned to her colleague. "You realise we could just put an end to his rule over the caste right now."

Minerva shook her head. "I really don't like to say this, Poppy, but I feel he is the only barrier between the students and the Carrows' madness. Who knows what would be done to us all if the death eaters realized we'd done something to him."

It was Poppy's turn to sight. "Fine. I guess now that I see him, I can't just leave him here. But Minerva, if he keeps on hurting people, I will feel responsible."

They moved him to his bed. He had not moved to the headmaster's apartments, which Minerva had thought of as perhaps, the only sign of his guilt. They wouldn't have let him do it anyway. His apartments had always been very net: all was always in order and clean. He and Minerva had argued about that, as she had a secret tendency to let things quickly go out of control in her own rooms.

"For Merlin's sake Minerva, you are a witch. Is a simple wave of your wand too much for you to perform? I don't expect you will find this book of yours until Christmas."

"Actually, it's my own way to store things. See?" she got the book they had been looking for from under a pile on her desk "I know exactly were things are".

"Still, those books should be in your library. Why do you have one if not to store your books?"

Minerva laughed. "And spend my Sundays making up my own storing system that even our librarian had a hard time understanding? No, thank you dear, I have other hobbies."

He had rolled his eyes.

But his rooms were not so clean now. Only his books were properly stored: she guessed he just had had no time to read. There was something off.

Poppy was performing a diagnostic spell on him. His skin was now of a greyish, green colour, his cheeks flushed by the fever. The nurse quickly undid the top of his robes, revealing his bonny neck.

"He's in… he's in really bad shape. Worse than I ever saw him before," she said. "He has the flu to begin with, no wonder why he's so sick, severely underweight and dehydrated which is certainly why he got ill in the first place, his body just can't protect him anymore." she moved her wand further down and frowned. "It's an overdose".

"An overdose?" Minerva asked.

"Veritaserum overdose. Dear Lord, how was he even conscious in the first place? He should have been passed out from the beginning."

The other looked down at the man laying on the bed. "Isn't he supposed to be immune? Why would You-know-who do that?"

"It happened before. He said it was because the effects on the brain allowed You know who to have a much easier access to his thoughts when he was using legilimency on him. You have to be exceptionally powerful and skilled to fight the potion and his attacks at the same time. He was. But he's going to be very sick, his body cannot bear such amount of potion."

Minerva looked at her. "But why would You know who do that? Didn't he prove to him he was loyal enough? Was killing Albus not enough?" she felt angry. She didn't know why. Poppy paused.

"We can still leave him."

They fell silent. "Could he die?" Minerva finally asked. Poppy hesitated.

"If you want me to be completely sincere, then I can't overlook the possibility of him shocking in his own vomit while unconscious or die the next time his master decides to test him because his body won't be able to take it."

"Then I guess we will help him, Poppy. At least I will."

The nurse opened her bag and took several potions out she carefully placed beside the bed. "Minerva, I know I may seem heartless, but Severus was my friend too. I took care of him; I saw him in his weakest moments. I thought I knew him, too. I just can't allow myself to feel anything else than hate or disgust, because – because if I do, all of this will hurt even more. I don't need to explain this to you."

Minerva gave her a weak smile and moved next to her to help support the man's head. "I understand, Poppy. Very well, actually."

"I just wish… I just wish I could understand. I never imagined, never saw anything; what else did I miss?"

She cleaned his face with a wet tissue and made him swallow several potions; there was one to settle his stomach, another with nutrients, one to reduce the fever and another to alleviate his symptoms. In a few hours, if they had a positive effect, she would try to administrate a potion to help him expel the Veritaserum, and then give him muggle medicine. Minerva nodded. "I've spent days, weeks wondering what we'd done wrong, Poppy. I still don't understand. It feels like everything – everything was such a big lie, and I was so blind to it all, I saw nothing-"

"None of us did." She laid his head back on the pillow. "And that is what bothers me… If we couldn't see that our colleague was after all a death eater, a friend, what about our students?"

"I don't even want to think about it."

Poppy got up to bring a glass of water. "Why won't this man even drink? It is like he does not want to stay alive."

"He never knew how to take care of himself, after all", Minerva said sadly. They had tried so hard to make him better, to make sure he ate enough, that he got out of his dungeons once a week, that he came to the staff parties sometimes. And he had killed Albus. Just like that. She hated looking at him.

"I'll stay with him tonight if you want", Poppy said. "I'll just consider it my duty as a nurse."

Minerva sighted. "No, I'll stay. This could be an opportunity to look at him in the eyes and ask him why."

Poppy looked up. "Minerva… Don't do that to yourself. It's pointless."

"I have no other reason to take care of him. I nearly killed him just an hour ago, and if I can't even try to understand- yes, I would just- leave him here. He did much more than killing a friend. It's because of him that everything collapsed."

Her colleague nodded. She knew that deep inside, she wanted answers too. Badly.

"Fine. He may have a concussion but we'll have to wait for him to wake up to be sure. We'll wake in an hour. Try to make him drink water as much as possible then." She stood. "I may try to hate him, but deep down I don't want him to die. I just can't bring myself to. I think… I think I pity him."

"I'll hate him when he tells me he did it cold-blooded."

They were silent.

"Minerva, even if he didn't, he killed Albus. What are you hopping for?"

She shook her head. "I don't know. I really don't."