A/N: I hope everyone is safe and well in these times of Covid-19. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Haikyuu, only original characters.
Chapter 4: What I'd Wished to Forget
Tail swishing, Nemo gnawed at the pellets of food that Haruka had poured into his dish. Was he two, three years old now? Haruka had taken him in when her aunt's cat birthed a litter. When they first moved into this house, Nemo hid himself under the couch for a week straight. Now, he had no qualms jumping onto furniture, napping on Haruka's bed, and leaving ginger cat hair everywhere.
Opening the sliding door to let fresh air in, Haruka sat down and looked out at her family's rather miserable backyard. They'd yet to succeed in growing anything. It reminded Haruka of Mrs. Inoue's backyard and the flower bed that wasn't blooming at all. In Haruka's previous house, her mother had bought potted herbs once for the kitchen, thinking it might be easier to control temperature indoors, but the herbs died quickly and Nemo started biting the wilted branches off, so they threw the whole lot away.
Scratching the back of Nemo's ears absentmindedly, Haruka observed the dwindling daylight.
She hadn't spoken or texted with Nishinoya since his ace returned to the team, and considering how much Nishinoya cared about the volleyball club, it was hard not to think of their week together as a one-off arrangement made possible by special circumstances. Not that she was aiming to have it last or anything. In retrospect, had she not heard the libero speak about what was happening and what he hoped to achieve, she would've thought he was hitting on her with how frequently they met.
Shocked at the thought, Haruka shook her head to dispel the heat creeping up her cheeks. It was all that first-year's fault—Hinata, was it, blurting out something preposterous.
Pulling absently at the ends of her hair, Haruka thought back to Nishinoya's temper, how furious he had been, fists clenched and lips pulled back into a snarl. She didn't really know how to deal with him in that state. Why get so heated up by a club of all things?
Nemo yawned and arched his back, finished with his food. His collar bell tinkled with the movement. Slipping out of Haruka's grasp, he padded across the living room to curl up in the comfort of his bed. Stretching out a paw, he lay sideways in what must be a bout of food coma.
I wonder what that feels like for cats. Come to think of it, it's almost Nemo's birthday. Bemused, Haruka let the cat sleep and went back to her room.
-.-.-.-
Later that night, Haruka dreamed.
It was summer again and the heat was suffocating. She shifted uncomfortably beneath her clothes that stuck to her skin in the humid air.
There were so many people on the street and they got on perfectly fine. The two of them had stopped on the way. She could feel the familiar pounding of her heart in her ears, her breath quickening to match the rhythm. Perspiration trickled from her temple to the side of her jaw. She wiped her hands on her T-shirt, but they only got clammier.
What, you don't want to do it? His voice was flat and nonchalant. Haruka could hear the barely veiled disappointment, how it was said to judge and disparage her.
Haruka bit her lip. "I don't want to." He cupped her cheek, it made her flinch. He was taller than her, stronger, faster, older.
You should at least be curious, he said again. He relaxed his hand. It slid down her neck to her collarbone and stayed there. Haruka felt her insides freeze and thought her skin must break from the temperature difference with the sweltering atmosphere.
And just as effortlessly, he ceased contact. He smiled. His black hair fell into his eyes which were hard as flint. He stepped away. Haruka, you're no fun.
Weak in her knees, Haruka tried desperately to grasp his receding form. She broke into a run, but the gap was unbreachable. In the space between her outstretched hand and his retreating back, the cicadas beat their wings, louder and louder until she wheezed and spluttered with the onset of loss.
He was the one who made her this way, he was the only one who could fix this—
Haruka woke to the darkness of her room. That again. She set her gaze at the ceiling and blinked back the wetness in her eyes.
It's spring. I'm alone in my room. I'm warm, beneath my covers. Nishinoya flashed across her mind, he and his obnoxious messenger bag and slogan T-shirts. The view of his back when he stood up in Mrs. Inoue's backyard, bandage freshly applied on his left arm, eager and confident to prove his worth.
At that moment, he gave the feeling that he was impenetrable, someone who could pull down walls, and nothing in the world could get between him and what he set out to do. Not like her. She'd rather put up walls than tear them down. It was like she couldn't bear to see what was on the other side, if it disappointed her and was beyond her expectations. And didn't she know what that felt like.
Haruka looked over to the digital clock on her nightstand. 2:47. Clutching her blanket tighter, Haruka wrapped herself in a cocoon. She didn't fall asleep until a long while later.
-.-.-.-
"Kobayashi-san!"
"What?" Haruka asked, her voice sharper than was polite. Nao smiled nervously and handed her a form.
"I-I bumped into Fukuoka-senpai in the hallway. She was distributing the notice for our Golden Week training camp."
Feeling guilty, Haruka held the document and mumbled her thanks. It was two nights ago, but the dream, or the gloom that it brought, was still affecting her and getting in the way of her sleep.
"Are...Are you looking forward to it?" Haruka asked Nao, to make up for her rudeness. Haruka knew her classmate had been trying to get to know her more, and this question was her attempt at conversation. She wondered if it was manipulative of her for impressing on Nao this way.
Brightening, Nao replied, "Yes! I've never had an overnight camp at junior school before. It sure sounds fun. I wonder what it'll be like!"
Thinking back to training camps with her middle school track team, Haruka remembered the experience of having to share baths and trying to sleep amidst unceremonious snoring. Not wanting to voice disagreement, she could only nod vaguely.
Once Nao left for lunch with Rika and the others, Haruka put away her books and breathed a small sigh of relief. Skimming through the arrangements of the training camp, it seemed like other sports clubs were also staying on campus for different activities. Girls' basketball, scouts, track and field, boys' volleyball.
Come to think of it, he did mention a match over Golden Week. Deciding not to delve into it too much, Haruka went for her usual lunch spot—the rooftop being unavailable, she'd taken a liking to eating in the courtyard—and couldn't wait to jog once school was over to blow off steam.
-.-.-.-
"Ugh… I'm gonna die."
Haruka put her hands on her knees and gasped for air after her third dash up Karasuno's Heartbreak Hill, or so it was called by all the athletes who had to train with it. In reality it was a road veering up a steep incline very rarely frequented by vehicles. Her teammates were in similar states of breathlessness, clutching their sides and wiping sweat off their foreheads.
"Alright team! I know it's hard. One more round and we're off for lunch," Fukuoka said, smiling and folding her arms while collective groans came from the rest of the team. "We're sharing the cafeteria with a few other groups. If you'd appreciate a full lunch selection, I'd suggest making our way back on time."
When they did get to the school cafeteria, several other clubs were already seated with their food. Carrying her tray of beef udon and miso soup, Haruka swept her eyes across the room. She didn't know what she was looking for, really. Scoffing to herself, Haruka made her way to her team's table and sat down with the first-years.
Toda Akane, already looking tired, was poking at her bowl of rice with her chopsticks. Kita Ichika and Takahashi Mirai seemed more enthusiastic about the latest album release than food while Nao, obviously having never heard it, fidgeted with being on the edge of the conversation. Just what is it with this girl and trying to fit in?
Despite the rather old interior, Karasuno's cafeteria had pretty good catering by school standards. Slurping her udon quietly, Haruka appreciated the meal after the morning training session. The girls were due to use the sports ground in the afternoon; the boys' track and field club had already trained there in the morning and they were going to switch.
"Say, Kobayashi, which middle school did you come from?" Mirai said, her head on her hand. She'd been hovering her chopsticks in her other hand for some time, clearly not interested in her food.
"S-Shiratorizawa."
"No way! Why are you here at Karasuno? Students from their junior academy get promoted to their high school division, right? And you totally have that smart student vibe."
Nao blinked curiously at her. Haruka withheld a grimace. She'd dreaded people asking her. The reaction was as expected, with Shiratorizawa being one of the best schools in Miyagi, but the last thing she wanted was to be labeled as a misplaced elite student or something. "My grades are mediocre there," she said. "My family used to live in Wakano, but we moved here recently and Karasuno's closer."
"What a waste! I would've jumped at the chance." Mirai wasn't one to mince her words, Haruka realized. She shrugged and Mirai, not caring that much in the end, moved on. "So, Matsuoka, which school are you from?"
"I-I'm from Nagamushi Junior High," Nao said, jumping slightly at the sudden attention. She started reaching for her hair before putting her hand back on the table. "Most of the people in my year went to other high schools in the area, though."
"Well, me and Ichika are from Chidoriyama. Akane said she was from another prefecture. Yamagata?" Receiving a nod from the girl, Mirai grinned and slung an arm around Ichika, who raised an eyebrow. "Nice to meet everyone, I guess. Kobayashi, you're going to have to prove to us you're not some kind of goody-two-shoes or closet genius."
"Right," Haruka managed. Mirai's personality reminded her of someone... Anyway. She was about to dig into her lunch again when she heard loud bickering coming from all the way across the room.
"Hinata, you suck. Can't you even do a half-decent serve?"
"Shut it, Bakayama!"
With most of the other clubs already seated, the volleyball club had to split themselves among several tables at the center of the cafeteria. Haruka spotted Nishinoya. He and his buzz cut friend and the bickering first-years wasted no time dashing to the food queue. A third-year, who Haruka surmised was the captain, yelled after them about their manners. ...What a handful. I feel sorry for him.
"He's kinda hot, don't you think? The first-year, the taller one," Ichika said, sitting up straighter. "Our volleyball club looks a bit intimidating in black, though..."
It was true. Karasuno had black gakuen jackets for guys and blue blazers for girls, but it had laxer rules for how these colors were incorporated into athletic team uniforms. Many teams had opted to use combinations of black, blue, grey, and white to look more stylish. For the track and field club, they had blue jerseys and black shorts with blue stripes on the sides. The volleyball club tracksuit, however, was just black, like crows.
"Kageyama? He's in my class." Akane lifted her head and spoke softly. "He's an idiot."
"I-is that so…"
"Ah! That's my senpai," Mirai said, pointing her chopsticks at Nishinoya. "The short guy with the bleached hair."
"He's also from Chidoriyama?" Haruka found herself asking. She couldn't help but look at Mirai's chopsticks. Is everyone from Chidoriyama this forthright?
"Yeah, he won an award for volleyball or something."
Haruka wouldn't say she was surprised. She had yet to see Nishinoya in a match, but he had great athletic sense and reflexes when it came to volleyball.
Now she knew about him, Haruka wondered if Nishinoya would ever find out about her middle school. Well, I'll cross that bridge when I get there—if we even talk about it at all.
-.-.-.-
Nothing beats a nice, warm shower after a full day's worth of training. Plopping onto her futon, Haruka gave a small, contented sigh. Her hair was still damp. The first-years had just returned from the showers to the dormitory room where the girls' track and field club would sleep.
Their upperclassmen were already in groups, enjoying the hour or so of free time before curfew. Nao was still in the bathroom, she supposed, and Akane looked like she wouldn't mind sleeping right this instant. Mirai and Ichika already had their earphones out, no doubt for the album they'd talked about at lunch.
Haruka found herself a bit thirsty. Deciding to go grab something, she stood up again. She glanced at her teammates and decided to ask.
"I'm going to get a drink. Takahashi-san, Kita-san, do you want anything?"
"Nope, I'm good, thanks," Mirai turned and said. "And drop the suffix, you know? I called you Kobayashi."
Smiling slightly, Haruka stepped out of the room.
Walking along the corridor, Haruka thought where she'd seen those vending machines. There should be several at the main entrance, which was on the other side of the building. Traveling down the stairs, she headed to what she'd figured was the right direction.
As she turned a corner, she saw a figure clad in white. Haruka stared for a few seconds before realizing she was supposed to recognize this person.
"...Nishinoya-san?"
Taking notice of her, Nishinoya looked up, his hair falling soft over his forehead. A towel hung around his neck.
Wha— "Your hair… It's you, right?"
"'Course it is!" Nishinoya huffed.
Did someone make fun of him? Nishinoya's blond and brown strands were tousled and slightly damp. Haruka caught herself staring and averted her eyes, her face flushed. She would never admit how she thought he looked now.
The libero gave a questioning frown. "Kobayashi, why are you even here? This is the boys' wing."
After saying it, even Nishinoya widened his eyes in awkwardness, but not as much as Haruka, who would rather the floor swallow her whole. How could she not know where she was heading?
"I-I-It wasn't on purpose! I was trying to find a vending machine," Haruka retorted, holding up her wallet in defense. "I wanted to get something to drink."
"Oh." Nishinoya blinked. He snapped out of it soon enough, though. "There's one near the entrance! I'll take you there."
"It's okay, if you could tell me how—"
Nishinoya was already ahead of her to the entrance by the time she tried to politely decline. Shoulders sinking in defeat, Haruka followed him. He seemed to have already gotten over whatever embarrassment they'd had bumping into each other. At least they were heading to a common area now. Team curfew was at ten, and she'd really just want to buy her drink quickly.
There were indeed vending machines in the lobby next to the main entrance. Looking at the selection, Haruka debilitated between a juice and a yogurt drink. "Nishinoya-san, would you like anything?"
"I'm good. I won't have you pay for it anyway. It's not—"
"—not manly, right?" Haruka sighed. Then she looked at him and closed her mouth. "Sorry, um, I don't mean to cut you off… But I heard it a lot during practice, you know?"
Nishinoya grinned. "It's what I live by."
Boys. Suppressing another sigh, Haruka pressed a button and retrieved her carton through the flap at the bottom of the vending machine. She poked her straw through and sipped. Sweet, tangy apple juice.
There were footsteps coming down the stairs on the side. Turning, Nishinoya waved and said, "Chikara! Lend me 150 yen!"
"And why would I do that?"
Haruka watched the other upperclassman lean on the banister, looking over them. From the interaction, he was probably Nishinoya's teammate. The teammate saw her and she bowed a little, her nerves on edge again with whatever he might be thinking of her and Nishinoya, here together at this time of night. It's probably just me, it's not that big of a deal.
"Aw man, don't be so stingy. I'll treat you the next time we go to Sakanoshita," Nishinoya promised, thumping his hand on his chest.
"Yeah, yeah… Don't come back too late, or Daichi-san will get mad," the teammate—who Nishinoya had called by first name, Haruka noted—said, throwing his wallet toward the libero.
"Thanks! I owe you one!"
Nishinoya wasted no time getting himself some grape juice. "So, Kobayashi, how's practice?"
"It's fine," Haruka said, trying to look away still. She hated how frazzled she was being and shook her head to snap out of it, earning another look from the libero. "We did a few drills at Karasuno's Heartbreak Hill. Have you done that before?"
"Sure I have! Man, that thing is steep. We might go running there over the next few days, actually," Nishinoya exclaimed. "Also, we're going to have a practice match near the end of the week."
"Which Miyagi high school is that?"
"No, with Nekoma, from Tokyo." Nishinoya looked nothing but ready for the challenge. "I can't wait!"
Haruka blinked. She'd heard of Nekoma. "That's surprising, for them to come all this way."
"It's amazing, isn't it?" Nishinoya slurped the last of his juice and crushed the carton in his hand. "We'll show them what Karasuno is made of. Our power ace! Weird first-year duo! Kiyoko-san! They won't know what hit 'em." He threw his head back and laughed.
Weird first-year duo? Kiyoko-san? "Hinata, you mean? Is Kiyoko-san—"
"Our manager!" Haruka swore she saw stars in Nishinoya's eyes. "She's, she's…" A blush—a blush—spread over his cheeks. Then he said, with utter seriousness: "When Kiyoko-san smiles, the world becomes peaceful."
"What?" Haruka laughed. She cocked her head. "You like her, or something?"
Nishinoya got so flustered he almost dropped his carton. "Gah! You—I—Something like this—Ryuu also—"
"Sorry, sorry, I'm just making fun of you."
Haruka still had half of her drink left, but decided to walk back with it. She felt she should, anyway. Giving Nishinoya a half-smile, she stepped back and said, "Well, I'm going back to my team. Good luck for the practice match, and thanks for showing me the way."
"H-huh." Nishinoya stopped his stammering and straightened up. "You're so polite all of a sudden."
"I'm always like that."
With that, Haruka turned and started heading back to the girls' wing.
"Oyasumi, Kobayashi!"
With how loud he typically was, Nishinoya figured Haruka would've heard, but she'd gone around the corner by then.
-.-.-.-
"Oyasumi, he said."
"Chikara! You were there!"
"I'm just curious by the fact that you even spoke to a girl, Nishinoya."
"Haa?" Nishinoya's voice was muffled as he threw himself onto the futon. Turning his head, he said, "I have no idea what you're talking about."
Tanaka's ears perked. "Noya-san spoke with a girl? Is she cute?"
Ennoshita smiled at the libero, who glared back. "Who was that, anyway?"
"Kobayashi, she's a first-year. Kind of like my neighbor. She lives really close, so."
"Ah, to see the day when you graduate from Kiyoko-san—"
"What? We'll follow Kiyoko-san wherever she goes!" Nishinoya and Tanaka jumped up immediately to defend their adoration for the manager. Grinning, they bumped fists in camaraderie of their two-people fanclub.
Actually, the duo was sure the third-years also had a thing for Kiyoko; they were just too lame to show it.
Tanaka continued, "Even if Kiyoko-san said she'd steal all my belongings, I'd still—"
"Right, I think we've all heard that before," Sugawara interrupted, walking into the room with Asahi trailing behind, who was pulling at one of his tangly strands that had, apparently, scared everyone. "Go to sleep, all of you, before Daichi makes you."
With the excitement over, Nishinoya slipped into his futon and stared at the ceiling. Soon the room was completely dark, with sounds of Tanaka's familiar snoring next to him. The last thing Nishinoya remembered before falling asleep was the vague motion of brown hair swaying on the back of a receding form.
-.-.-.-
A/N: *Oyasumi means "good night". Oh Nishinoya :)