Pros And Cons Of A Curse
There are no pros to his curse, only cons. Kenny's sure of it.
"I just feel bad, I'm sorry, ya father just can't get a job, and Olive Garden ain't doin' so well at the moment" Kenny's mother said, in her thick southern accent. He loved her accent. It almost made him forget his dissapointment, almost.
He knew it wasn't his parents fault, well, it was, but that was besides the point. The important thing was that they tried, more than any other parent in this town, and that's all he cares about. His parents loved their kids, so he could understand and accept their struggle.
"I know, you shouldn't feel bad, I'll get to go anyway, I'll watch" He smiled, and his mother pulled him into a hug, thanking him for being so patient and understanding, for being such a good kid. In reality, he was anything but.
He chose not to tell her how many times he had killed himself, hoping to stay that way, hoping to leave her behind, of course, before the novelty wore off. He chose not to tell her how much it hurt. Because it did, it always hurt, and he couldn't even escape this poverty ridden life, get rid of at least one more mouth to feed. Instead he just hugged her back. It was better that way.
The trip to the skydive centre near Denver was a long one, everybody was rowdy and buzzing with excitement, eccept Kenny, who basked in the amazing feeling of being on a comfortable, warm bus. He usually walked to school. His parents might not have paid, but this trip was going to be great.
Really, all they had to pay fir was renting a parachute, but those were expensive, so he got the full package, minus that. Maybe he could just jump without one, and experience it before he plummeted to his death. Nah, he'll just have fun while he's there, with his friends, his boyfriend. Speaking of which.
"Hey Butters" He cooed, slipping into the seat beside the blonde, who turned amd smiled at him, his scar looking awfully... visible today. Was it wrong to love that scar? It was like an imprint Kenmy had left on Butters' life, kind of like a sign sayin, 'Kenny was here'. It was an accident, and he still felt bad.
"Hey, Ken" Butters greeted, smile so wide his eyes closed. It was fake, Kenny reminded himself. Of course, he knew Butters was happy to see him, but with everything going on at home, even Kenny wouldn't smile genuinely, curse and all. He pulled Butters into a hug, ignoring the other's confused protests.
"I love you, you know that, right?" He asked quietly, feeling Butters nod slowly, finally understanding why he was being so lovey dovey. Butters always understood, however nieve he may be, because his Butters was smart. Very smart, and never selfish.
They stayed like that the rest of the ride, occasionally breaking into conversation. Mostly, it was just a comfortable silence, though. You couldn't really have an uncomfortable silence with Butters anyway, he was too... adorable to notice.
The bus stopped outside the Skydive centre, and everyone liled out, chatting. "I think they said its an outdoor one" Butters explained, holding Kenny's hand, which had wrapped itself around his shoulders. It fit perfectly, with Butters being so small. Kenny hummed. That was good, outdoor ones were always better.
The man, Kevin, Kenny remembered, because he had the same name as his brother, instructed them on how to use the parachute, how to jump off the edge of the plane, and where to land. Kenny stood to the side, listening, just in case. He was worried, a bit, for Butters, but he was just being overprotective. It was Butters.
Watching the class closely, trying to picture himself there with them, pulling on his harness, asking around every now and then for help, he noticed that Butters was grabbing a parachute, and Kevin stopped him.
"Oh hey, don't use that one, it's broken, it'll probably break mid-fall, unless you want to rent it for free, then go ahead" He joked, and Kenny perked up. He never missed a sentence with the word 'free' in it. Butters nodded and went to find another, as soon as Kenny walked over to Kevin, tapping him on the shoulder. He turned around, A professional grin on his face.
"How can I help you?" He asked cherrily, and Kenny grinned at how fake he sounds. That's how you have to be when you become a slave to your country, or something like that, that dad always said. Kenny cleared his throat.
"You said that that one would break mid fall?" He asked, way too happy for this line of questioning. Kevin's smile dropped, and he looked at Kenny with recognition and pity. Had that many people really tried to kill themselves while skydiving? What a cool way to die, and it would be the first time he did it skydiving, why not?
"look, son, I'm not going to stop you, because I know what it's like to go what you're going through, and I know, that if you really want to... leave, I can't stop you. It's your choice, but you must have something to live for, something. If you know for curtain, you can have the parachute"
Kenny was quite surprised, and although the man shouldn't be allowed to do this, and even risked getting fired, he understood. Kenny thought it over, was it really fair, even if he did come back, to put so much pressure on this man. just so he can have fun? Not be left out?
Yes, it was. All his life, Kenny had lived for someone else, acted selflessly, died protecting, or at least trying. He deserved to have fun at the expense of someone else for a change, and anyway, it would reset, this man would keep his job and forget. He wanted to have fun for a change.
He nodded, taking a deep breath. Kevin sighed, eyes shining something that wasn't quite sadness, but not quite pity, either. Kenny wasn't sure. He handed Kenny the parachute, who quickly put it on, and went to stand with everyone else.
"I thought you couldn't do it?" Butters asked, felling happy for his boyfriend, who wouldn't be left out, after all. Kenny grinned. "I found a way" He turned to look at the landscape, a beautiful sight from so high up, and his grin turned into a happy, content smile.
"I always find a way" He took Butters' hand in his own, entwining their fingers as the countdown started. 3.
"You know I love you, right?" 2.
Butters giggled, holding on tighter to Kenny's hand. That was the only answer he needed, and he sighed, a big, happy sigh of contentment.
1.
And they were gone, falling freely through the air. The entire class, in a long line, like birds. Kenny felt the air blow through his hair, the wind nipping at his face, but it was nice. He looked down, they told him not to, but he did. He would usually be scared of that, with the looming threat of death hovering over his head, but now it was different.
He was alright with this. He slowly let go of Butters' hand, knowing that soon they would open the parachutes. "kkkkkkkkkken" Butters asked, the wind muffling his speech and making him sound one hundred times more adorable than usual, something Kenny had deemed impossible. Today was full of surprises.
He turned his head, seeing that Butters hand was hovering over the pin to pull to let the parachute out, eyeing him worried. Kenny smiled, mouthing the words, 'I'm alright with it this time', because he was. There was no way he would rather be than next to his Butters, smiling, and enjoying himself.
The point came to pull the pin, and everyone did, including Kenny, but as expected, the broken parachute didn't work. Butters parachute had a picture of a bunny on it. Of course he would pick that one, Kenny thought fondly. He'll never forget the fear in Butters eyes when Kenny's parachute didn't work, when the meaning of the words, 'I'm alright with this finally sunk in'.
Butters will though, and he's glad, because his Butters wouldn't want to remember. He didn't want him to. This was Kennys memory to remember happily, not Butters to remember, fearfully. To remember the day as the day he lost his love. It was sometimes better if they forget.
Kenny continued falling, and his last though t, before he hit the ground and woke up in bed, Butters happy face before the jumped out of the plane, his warm hand in Kenny's, was that dying might not be so bad, in some situations. It had it's Pros.