a/n: I don't own the universe, just borrowing it. =)

Kylo's eyes opened slowly. He attempted to lift his arm above his head but quickly realised it was still pinned down by the sleeping form next to him. Immediately he froze, hoping not to wake her, but it was too late. Rey's eyes fluttered open as she yawned.

When Rey's eyes finally met his, she pulled away from him slightly, "How am I still here?"

"I don't know." Kylo was honestly surprised to still see her with him in the morning. He knew that their bond was getting stronger, he could feel it, but for it to last through the night was far more than he imagined possible.

"Do you think he was telling the truth?" Rey asked.

"Who?"

"Snoke. Do you think he was telling the truth when he said he linked our minds?" Rey clarified.

"No, I don't think he was. At first I did, but not anymore." Kylo had believed Snoke in the moment, it was one of the things that had driven him to make the choice to kill him in that moment; To learn that this connection he had come to cherish in some strange way had been fabricated by Snoke infuriated him. But when the bond continued after his death, Kylo began to question the claim.

"Neither do I." Rey answered simply.

Kylo somewhat reflexively tightened his arm around Rey, pulling him closer to his body. Her leg was ever so slightly draped over his. He tried to remember he had been this physically close to another person. It had been a few years, and that had never been comfortable in the way that this was.

"I've been thinking about Snoke." Kylo was not used to voicing his thoughts, but he continued. "Something has been, missing ever since…" He trailed off. The memory of Rey denying his offer to join him still stung and he did not want to remind her of that choice.

"What do you mean?" She asked, as she looked up to meet his eyes. If the choice she made that day was relevant to how she felt now, she gave no indication.

Kylo stayed silent for another moment. He had only just begun to work out what this meant and wasn't quite sure he had the words to explain, "Ever since I was young there was something in me, and anytime I tried to mention it to M.. Leia or Luke, they would dismiss it, make me not talk about it."

Rey remained silent.

"Once I learned that Vader was my grandfather, I had come to assume that it was him that I could feel. It's why I began to seek out anything of his I could. I thought, hoped it would give me the answers my family wouldn't."

"What does this have to do with Snoke?"

"I don't really know. I just know that whatever that... thing was that I felt my entire life, it's gone now. Ever since I killed him. I didn't notice at first. I was too.." He was back to the pain she inflicted upon him. "Preoccupied with other thoughts."

Rey sat up, using her hand on his chest as leverage, "And you think it was Snoke? You think he was in your head all this time? Do you think he made you do things?"

Her sudden barrage of questions caught him off guard. There was an eagerness to it that struck him. "I don't know. I don't think so. I made my own choices," He was more defensive than he meant to be. He always considered his life to be on a particular path, that this was where it was always destined to end up. It had become an easy excuse to push away regret. But now that it seemed that maybe he really did have far less say in his future thanks to Snoke influencing his mind from as early as he could remember, he found himself now trying to convince himself that he chose this.

Rey was on her feet. "This is what you chose to be?" The look on her face hurt him.

"No. My life was, is on a path. I…" As he sat up, he broke eye contact with her for only a moment and when he went to meet her gaze again, he found empty air. He let out a heavy sigh and his shoulders dropped.

She was mad at him again. No, not mad. This was something different. When she asked if Snoke made him do these things she sounded so hopeful, almost relieved. If Kylo Ren was something Snoke created by being a part of his mind, Rey could forgive him for it. But if Ben created Kylo, he wasn't sure she could.

Rey had almost forgotten they weren't actually in the same room. It wasn't until she was suddenly staring at an empty bed did she remember he wasn't really with her. The thought that Snoke had some sort of influence over Ben left her mind reeling. But the day had already started as she could hear the muffled sound of people moving outside her room.

As if on cue, Leia sent her a message requesting her presence in the council room they set up on base. Her stomach grumbled, so she grabbed a small bit of rations on her way out the door. She just managed to get the last bite down as she entered the room, Leia, Joph, and a few others turned to her expectantly as she arrived.

"Ah, good you did get my message. Please, sit." Leia motioned towards the empty chair to her right. Rey reluctantly took the symbolic seat. Leia continued, "As I was saying, we've gotten word that an unaffiliated group of rebels attacked a First Order base on their own planet. While the attack was only minimally successful, it is indicative of more people wanting to stand up for themselves. We have decided to take this opportunity to begin our new recruitment missions. Rey, you, Chewie, and Poe will head to Lothal to attempt to make contact with the leaders and persuade them to join the Resistance as a whole."

Rey's attention to the rest of the meeting came and went, which was probably not ideal since she was meant to be on what was probably an incredibly important mission. After about twenty minutes of discussion, Leia dismissed the meeting and Poe came up beside her.

"You ready for this?" He asked, a glimmer of excitement in his eye.

"I suppose I don't have a choice, do I?"

Poe chuckled, "I guess not, but you'll be with me and Finn. The dream team."

Rey couldn't help but to roll her eyes, even if she was excited to get out into space for a mission.

"I can't say I'm surprised it was Lothalites that attacked a First Order base. They've got quite the history of rebels." He had a slightly glimmer of admiration in his eyes as he spoke. "See you on the Falcon in a bit?"

Rey nodded and headed back to her quarters to grab a few things. After shoving an extra shirt and a few ration packs in her satchel, she picked up her staff and glanced back at her small room. They had only been on Parmathe for a little over a week but she had already come to appreciate the relative privacy of her room. Being back on the ship with Poe, Finn, and Chewy while her connections with Kylo were getting stronger and more frequent gave her a genuine moments pause. Having to explain such a seemingly intimate connection with Enemy Number One seemed impossible.

Was he really still the enemy? She thought about their interactions since their meeting in the throne room. When he pulled Luke's saber towards her, she was certain that was the moment he turned to the light. But when she begged for him to save her friends, his own mother, he was so focused on that throne that once belonged to Snoke.

Rey had always assumed that Snoke was responsible for connecting the two of them and had confirmed it when she met him face to face. He had no reason to be honest with them though. He was a manipulator at his core. The thought that Snoke had been manipulating Kylo through his entire life gave Rey more hope than she cared to admit.

The team had arrived on Lothal after a thankfully uneventful flight. They were prepared for a First Order blockade on Lothal after the attack, but there was hardly a sign of them anywhere.

"That went better than I expected," Poe commented.

"Yeah, almost too easy," Finn was skeptical. They both looked to Rey rather expectantly, to see if she felt anything off.

She looked back and forth between their awaiting faces. The truth was that no, she didn't sense anything. At least not anything that scared her. She did feel a sort of draw toward the planet, but she chalked it up to nerves or the excitement of being somewhere she'd never been before. "I got nothing. Come one, let's find this Azadi as quickly as we can."

The only instruction they really had was to go to the Capital city and to head toward the old Senate building. It was towards the center of the city, and was reasonably run down. The remnants of a bustling city were evident, but it was not much of one any more. After about twenty minutes of walking through alleys and back streets, they came upon a door covered in graffiti.

"This is the place." said Poe.

"How do you know?" Finn asked,

Poe pointed to a small firebird symbol on the top corner of the door. "That. It's an old symbol, but it still carries a lot of importance around here."

As if on cue, the door slid open to reveal a young woman, her dark hair half pulled back from her face. "Figured I'd see you guys soon." She gestured them through the threshold.

"Are you Azadi?" Poe wasted no time in getting down to business.

The woman smiled, "Yes, Ella Azadi. Welcome to the home of Lothal's rebel cell."

Finn wasn't sure what to focus on in the room they now found themselves in. They had an incredible set up, and there were nearly as many people here in this base as there were on their own. "This is incredible."

Ella seemed to beam, "Thanks. After the fall of the Galactic Empire, my grandfather swore to always keep a space like this in working order. He fought hard in the war and never quite trusted that it would be that easy. I hate that he was right, but I'm glad that he left this for us."

Poe nodded, "My parents felt the same. They tried really hard to raise me without the constant worry of battle, but I don't think it's a feeling that ever goes away. I'm Poe, Poe Dameron by the way. This is Finn and Rey."

"Well, I guess I know why you're here." Ella spoke, moving the conversation away from the somewhat painful reminiscing. "And I gotta say, Not surprised General Organa would send you here after what we did."

"Which was awesome by the way…" Finn quickly interjected. Poe gave him a quick look which left him trailing off.

Ella laughed anyway, "We try. Lothal is all too familiar with occupation. The First Order presence here is small, which is why we were able to pull anything off at all. Their base is just on the outskirts of the eastern side of the city. Our goal wasn't to destroy or kill anyone, just send a message that they aren't welcome. There hasn't been any retaliation… yet. But we are expecting it. I hope you guys are ready for a fight if it comes to it."

This time Poe grinned, "Always are. And we are on the same side after all."

Ella ever so slightly rolled her eyes. "Like I said, I guess I know why you guys are here."

Just then one of the work stations began to beep and the man sitting in front of it shouted in the general direction of the group, "Ella, we got a transmission, it seems to be coming from a star destroyer in orbit."

Ella grinned, "Told you it was coming." She moved to stand behind the workstation, "Well, let's hear what they have to say."

The man pressed a few buttons and the transmission played through the room for all to hear, "Attention Rebels of Lothal. This is General Graven of the First Order." The man seemed to struggle with the word rebels. "We understand that you are unhappy with the current assistance we are providing."

"Assistance my ass" Finn shouted, earning him another slight glare from Poe, but a giggle out of Rey.

The transmission continued, "If you wish to discuss this matter in person, please be at the following coordinates in 4 hours."

Everyone remained silent, waiting for Ella's response to what seemed like an odd request from the First Order. Her face was scrunched up in confusion. "Lets see what they have to say. You guys care to join me?" She spoke to the trio.

"This is definitely a trap." Poe was certain in his tone, "Count us in."

"I do not like this. This will not end well. I know General Graven. Well, I know OF him." Finn corrected. He generally avoided talking about his personal knowledge of the First Order lest it cause others concern about his dedication to the Resistance.

Ella however, was observant. The slip up did not get by her. She studied Finn's face for a moment. "Finn was it? What is your story."

Finn smiled nervously, "Story, no real story. Just a guy, fighting for the Resistance."

"I have someone I think you should meet. Hey Zev, got a minute?" She nodded her head towards Finn, calling the man over. "This is Zev, he's been our, well I guess you could say inside source on the First Order. This is Poe, Rey, and Finn." Ella put a small emphasis on the last name, a gesture that was not unnoticed.

Zev shook each of their hands as Ella made the introductions, "Glad to meet you all. So Finn, what was the last Ship you were stationed on?"

"Uhh… I was on the Supremacy," he responded softly.

"Impressive ship. I never got the chance to be on it though. They moved me and my division from base to base so we could never get too comfortable with the locals."

"Wait, are you implying what I think you are?"

"That I was a stormtrooper? Sure am."

"What?! I had thought… Maybe." Finn started speaking a mile a minute, "I knew I wasn't, I couldn't be the only one."

Zev nodded, "Me too. There were four of us in my company when we defected."

"See Finn, I told you you weren't alone," Rey finally spoke up, and gave her friend a nudge with her arm.

"This is amazing. How did you get out, when did you get out? Where are the others?"

Ella chuckled, "Zev, why don't you and Finn get acquainted." She put her hands on Poe's and Rey's shoulders to pull them over to a nearby table, slightly further away from the various workstations. "So back to that why you're here bit."

"Right, we need bodies…"

"Poe, I'm going to stop you right there. That is the problem. These are people, not bodies. I heard about what happened. I know about General Holdo. It inspired a lot of people, but I also know what it cost you guys."

Poe's shoulders dropped. He was all too familiar with the feeling of what his choices wrought. "That's not what I meant, I mean…"

Rey interrupted, "He means that this is a fight we can't win alone. Yes, we lose people when we fight, but the First Order takes so much more," her eyes drifted to the far side of the room where Zev and Finn had settled. "They rule through fear, make you afraid to stand up for yourselves. But that sort of rule doesn't hold. You've already proven that by attacking their base."

Ella eyed Rey, "That doesn't answer why we should help the Resistance. We can deal with what is here."

"You maybe can. But what if you can't? There is a star destroyer in orbit now that says they just want to talk. But we both know that is probably a lie. They will stop at nothing until they own the whole galaxy." Rey's voice caught in her throat ever so slightly. She was thinking of the First Order when she spoke, but then she remembered who runs the First Order.

"I'll tell you what Rey, we will see how this meeting goes. And then maybe I'll talk to General Organa."

"That's all we can ask for," Poe spoke up again.

"I need to go take care of a few things before this rendezvous. Think you can handle keeping yourselves entertained until then?"

"Yep, sure can," Poe gave Ella a half hearted salute as she headed back to speak with on of her team. "See Rey, that's why you're here."

Rey shrugged, "I guess. I mostly just repeated what Leia said to me the other day."

"I believed it." Poe playfully jabbed her with an elbow. "Come on, lets go get a few things from the Falcon." He caught Finn's attention, who then waved them off as he was apparently still rather caught up in conversation with Zev.

The pair walked back a few streets to where they had left the Falcon, but as they got further into the open fields outside the city edge, Rey could feel it again. It was the pull she felt as they approached Lothal, but it was stronger. Her nerves had definitely calmed so she could no longer brush it off as that.

"Do you feel that, Poe?"

"Feel what?"

"I need to go." Rey picked up the pace towards what ever it was that was calling to her. "We've got three hours right? I'll be back."

"Rey, wait!" Poe shouted at her as she took off running across through the tall grass. "She is going to be the death of me, I swear."