AN: This is the request from MaMcMu. It took much longer than intended so it will be the only request that I'm going to do. If you haven't read the last chapter it is connected to this and will make this one make more sense (the last chapter was written years ago so it's style is much different that here). I think for now this will wrap up "Beyblade's Funniest Moments" unless I stumble across more old works on my iPod that I'm hoping will start up. I just realized how much I owe that little device. So thank you everyone for your support on the first story I've managed to convince myself to share. For anyone having doubts like I did for years, just go ahead and post your work. You've spent your time and energy writing or drawing, it deserves to be shown off! Yes, it wont be perfect, but perfect is a term that i've come to realize doesn't apply to us, and our faults can make something even more beautiful.
Disclaimer: I don't own Beyblade or it's characters (Just realized I forgot this in the last chapter but I don't own Beyblade there either). The idea here is MaMcMu's.
It had happened not long after the dare war had ceased due to Gingka and Masamune's absentminded defeats. There had been a Beyblade tournament and, without thinking, Gingka signed up the moment he heard about it, completely forgetting the dare. Of course Masamune had applied as well, knowing full well that this would be Gingka's inevitable downfall.
Gingka had been one of the first contestants up at the dish, while Masamune had settled smugly into his seat. But what he had failed to notice was that his mind was so preoccupied on Gingka that his subconsciousness had been left to run his pre-tournament routine, which included buying (and eating) a hamburger.
The DJ started the countdown.
"3!"
Watching with an admirable amount of attention for a hyper active teen, Masamune slowly raised his snack to his mouth.
Feet planted, Gingka brought his bey and launcher up into position above the dish, fingers curled around the rip cord.
"2!"
Masamune's mouth widened, bringing the juicy meat and bun closer.
Gingka's arm tensed, ready to pull back.
"1!"
The burger settled between his teeth.
The rip cord twitched.
"Let it rip!"
He bit down, letting the moist flavours flood into his mouth.
He launched, letting the thrill of a beybattle fill his being to the brim.
It was only then that both bladers realized what they had done. Gingka turned around and Masamune stood up.
They could only stare at each other before bursting into hysterics over who lost first. It was needless to say that although Gingka's opponent was a newbie, they defeated the world champion with ease.
Now, what happened not long after all that had gone down, was a result of what had happened even before the tournament. Gingka couldn't bey battle so Masamune battled as often as possible, jumping at every chance he got to flaunt his skills without Gingka showing him up. But Masamune's inability to eat burgers had led Gingka to jump at every chance he got to eat one in front of the self proclaimed #1 blader. And that was what had lead to the pegasus blader's current predicament...
Gingka struggled to fit in the chair, shifting and trying different angles in a futile attempt to just sit without falling off.
Madoka physically flinched as the wooden chair creaked and snapped in frightening intervals. Unable to take anymore of Gingka's fidgeting, Madoka clenched her fists and mentally prepared herself for an all out war.
"Gingka!"
The Pegasus blader froze and clutched the chair to keep from landing his butt on the floor. "What is it, Madoka?"
"Don't you dare 'what' me! You already know what it is!"
"That the next world championship is coming soon and we haven't signed up yet?"
"Yeah, what's up with that? The team with the number one blader, meaning myself of course, should be the first team on the list! Even if we need to camp out in front of the WBBA a week before the sign up opens!" Masamune protested.
"Ugh! You're all infuriating, you know that?" Madoka growled.
Yu piped up in his sing song voice. "It's because Ben-Ben now has competition."
"Hasn't anyone ever told you it's rude to comment on someone's weight?" Gingka exclaimed.
"But I didn't even say your name," Yu crossed his arms and closed his eyes, pouting.
"Well you implied it!" Gingka argued.
Yu opened an eye. "I don't even know what that means!"
Tsubasa sighed tiredly. "This isn't getting us anywhere. We all decided to meet at Madoka's to figure out what to do about Gingka's..." he paused to consider his word choice. "Current inability to blade."
"What are you talking about, I can battle perfectly!" Gingka moved to take Pegasus out of his pocket but in doing so lost the only leverage he had keeping him in the chair.
Flailing helplessly he toppled over sideways. The chair wobbled and with a frightened look, Gingka gulped and cried out as the chair landed on top of him.
"You can hardly sit in a chair, let alone walk. What makes you think you can beybattle?" Madoka exclaimed. She stood up and walked to stand over top of Gingka who was pinned down under the chair.
Gingka could only look away. Wether he wanted to admit it or not, he knew Madoka was right. His near immediate weight gain after the tournament was surely just for the convince of the author, he thought bitterly. He still hadn't gotten used to the way his body now moved and because of that hadn't been able to adjust his blading style.
Madoka let out a breath. "I have no choice. Gingka Hagane, I present you with your dieting schedule." Pulling out a sheet of paper, the mechanic thrust it before the said blader with obvious importance.
The eyes of the rest of the assembled team members widened. Even Tsubasa raised his head suddenly.
"A what?!" Gingka, Yu, and Masamune shouted.
"A dieting schedule," Madoka repeated. "And you will follow it to the vegetable."
"Vegetables?!" The same three cried.
Ripping the paper out of Madoka's hands, Gingka scanned it over to the best of his one armed ability. The other was still pinned.
"Fruit, yogurt, salad... Wait. Where's the hamburgers?!"
Madoka placed her hands on her hips. "Since that is what got you into this mess to begin with, I figured you could do without them."
"Figured... I could... do without them..." Gingka could feel his eyes tear up. "How could you?"
"Now, this takes effect immediately, so that means no more chips, ice cream, junk food, fast food, and above all, no hamburgers."
"What about a chicken burger," Gingka asked timidly.
"No burgers," Madoka corrected strictly.
Gingka deflated. He only wished he had deflated physically.
Three days had gone by since Gingka's appointed diet and he had learned fairly quickly that it would take a lot more than just persistence to get past Madoka.
Somehow she was always at every joint in town that served hamburgers. And always at the table closest to the door.
Gingka had tried the back door but had been attacked by an angry chef wielding a spatula, scolded in a language he could only guess might have been Spanish, threatened by a knife wielding butcher, and bombarded by an entire kitchen staff that looked like freakish siblings. It was also complete with a small man who beat his fist into his open palm twice before charging and latching onto his head, successfully tackling him to the ground.
It was safe to say that late night escape runs were just as, if not more, futile. Madoka would be waiting at the kitchen table in the dark with only a candle lit in front of her to make sure Gingka saw her. If he tried the window she was waiting outside. Meanwhile, the back door that lead to a sketchy alleyway was host to a variety of traps, each one strategically placed. He couldn't tell wether they were for him or a possible intruder, but he concluded it served as a double purpose.
Therefore he had sought out the only person that could understand his predicament: Benkei.
"So let me get this straight," the bull blader began. "You ate one too many hamburgers, gained a bunch of weight, you can't beybattle properly, and Madoka put you on a diet."
"Pretty much."
Gingka eyed Benkei's burger enviously. Why did he have to meet him at a fast food place?
He could feel a string of drool begin to seep from the corner of his mouth...
"Ahem!"
Gingka straightened at the sound of Madoka's voice.
"I wasn't thinking about eating it, I swear!" Gingka denied helplessly, frantically waving his arms,
"I thought so," Madoka said, returning to her laptop.
Suddenly, Benkei stood up and slammed his fists onto the table, drawing the attention of pretty much everyone in the restaurant.
"Bu-bu-bu-bull! You're looking at this the wrong way! You shouldn't be looking for a way to lose weight, you should be experiencing the joys of being bigger than everyone else! That's it! I, Benkei, shall prove to you that there is no reason for you to be down!"
Benkei grabbed Gingka by the wrist and hulled him to his feet, reefing him out the double doors at such a speed that he was dragging the red haired blader behind him, despite his newly developed size.
Gingka flailed helplessly. "But what about your beautiful hamburger?!"
"Now, I call this human bowling. Except unlike p.e. class, you don't run the risk of hitting your head on the wall."
Glancing nervously down the hill, Gingka backed away slowly.
Benkei had lined up ten empty garbage cans in a triangular formation, forming giant makeshift bowling pins at the bottom of the hill."
"Rule number one," Benkei began, "use slopes to your advantage!"
"Do you do this a lot?" Gingka gulped.
"No."
With a hardy slap on the back, Benkei sent Gingka staggering forwards. He tripped over his feet and flew literally head over heels down the hill. A loud tin bang sounded as he collided with the garbage cans.
Benkei strode down to meet him at the bottom.
"Did I get a strike?" Gingka asked dizzily.
One can stood standing but just before Benkei could tell Gingka that, another one continued to roll and hit it, knocking it down.
"Two more and you can call it a turkey!" Benkei exclaimed.
"Turkey..." Gingka moaned.
Meanwhile, Yu had found himself sitting at Madoka's table across from Masamune, counting his candy stash, or in other words, the only currency he dealt in.
With a triumphant gleam he pushed a handful forwards. "I bet ten pieces of candy that Gingki will out weight Ben Ben by the end of next week!"
Masamune tapped the table a few times with his finger in thought. "Alright then, I'll match your bet at ten pieces. I say Gingka will out weigh Benkei by the end of this week!" He tossed his own goodies into the central pile.
Tsubasa opened an eye. "Aren't you two a little young to be gambling?"
"Shhh!" Yu hushed, glancing around quickly. "The cops might hear you."
Gingka glanced up the apple tree, "Um, Benkei, I haven't exactly grown any taller you know?"
"Rule number two, apply your strength to everyday tasks!" The bull bladder huffed proudly.
"Oh! I know what you're saying!" With a smirk Gingka pulled out Pegasus, albeit clumsily, and prepped his launcher.
"Hey- you're not-"
"Let it rip!"
While he had been aiming towards a branch, Pegasus ricocheted off the solid trunk and flew back at him, straight towards his head.
With a yelp, Gingka flailed and just barely missed being decapitated by his own blade. Pegasus hit the wall behind them, cutting away some of the stone, before coming to a wobbly spin at his feet.
"Bu-bu-bu-bull! That's not it!"
Benkei wrapped his arms around the tree as Gingka struggled to pick up Pegasus without falling over, which he nearly did in surprise.
"Benkei?"
"Bu-bu-bu-buuullllll!" Benkei began to shake the tree, apples pelting down.
"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" Gingka cried, desperately trying to cover his head from the onslaught.
When he opened his eyes that he hadn't realized he had closed, a group of little kids had gathered, bright smiles on their faces.
"Thanks mister! That tree doesn't have any branches low enough for us to climb, we thought all the apples were going to go bad."
"Yeah, it would have been a real shame," a little girl smiled.
Benkei leaned down to ruffled their hair. "You're welcome, bu-bu-bu-bull!"
"Bu-bu-bu-bulllllll!" The little kids giggled, copying him.
Benkei laughed good heartedly and Gingka just stared for a while before smiling himself.
"Hm, it seems that was the last tree with apples still on it, looks like we'll just have to come back again so you can try it too!" Benkei exclaimed.
Gingka groaned, while things had turned out flawlessly this time (and this was Benkei here, the bull wouldn't have cared if he was caught), but he did not want to be caught doing that by Yu and especially not by Kyoya or Ryuga. They'd probably start shipping him with the tree and next thing he'd know they'd set a date and stuff him in a wedding dress. Maybe he'd at least be able to negotiate having Pegasus as his bridesmaid if he was lucky.
Yeah. He wasn't planning on hugging a tree.
It was late by the time Benkei had finally released him, promising a full day tomorrow, and Gingka was absolutely famished. All he could think about was a large juicy burger, that wasn't a crime was it? Envisioning the juice dripping from the meat... crisp bacon... slightly warmed, soft bun...
Smack!
Gingka was startled from his daydream when he ran straight into the B-Pit's glass doors. How on earth was he here already?
When he opened the doors the whole team was staring at him. Madoka, front and center, motioned to Yu and Masamune who had been standing right next to the doors. They manoeuvred behind him and locked the door then took Gingka by the arms.
"H-hey, what are you guys-"
"Bring him in," Madoka motioned towards the back of the B-Pit, towards the dining room.
Gingka's first thought was food, glorious food, but then he remembered that this was Madoka. He had no chance of a number 1 blader meal. Oh great, he was so hungry he was beginning to talk like Masamune.
When they rounded the corner his worst fears were realized. There, sitting on the table, in all its green and ungloryness, was a plate heaped with vegetables. He started to struggle, tried to pry his arms out from his friend's, but they held tight. He couldn't even shake little Yu. The two shoved him down into the seat across from the cursed dish. This was bad. Masamune and Yu were cooperating without arguing.
Madoka strode forwards. "Guard the door."
Masamune and Yu nodded, taking their place just outside but not before Gingka watched Yu pass something blue to Madoka.
" I wonder what would happen if I changed out the attack ring and switched the performance tip to a WD..." Madoka eyed Pegasus, spinning his blade around in her hand.
Gingka paled. How had Yu managed to get Pegasus? He was so going to get that kid for this.
"I've got a spare if you need it, Madoka," Tsubasa offered indifferently.
"Why thank you Tsubasa! I think I'll-"
"No! No! No! There's no need for that now," Gingka waved frantically, sweating nervously. "I'll eat them, I'll eat them, just please spare Pegasus!" He begged, hands now pleading.
"Ok then," Madoka motioned to the plate, "eat up."
Gingka gulped, glancing at his partner once more. "For you and only you." He slowly raised the fork to his mouth and took a tiny bite off the lettuce.
Sighing, Madoka pulled out her computer. "Tsubasa?"
The eagle blader nodded and pulled out the extra WD tip, handing it to the girl. "Here you are, Madoka."
A look of dread settled onto Gingka's face.
"Ok, lets see here," Madoka pulled out one of her tools, conveniently in her front pocket and not the case she meticulously kept every piece of equipment that was currently downstairs. That's when even Gingka knew that this had all been planned and he had no hope in avoiding the vegetables that sat mockingly in front of him, laughing.
He quickly sprung into action. "I'm eating, I'm eating! See?!" Gingka swung back the contents of the plate into his mouth, cheeks bulging and eyes watering.
The mechanic raised a brow along with the tool towards Pegasus. "Swallow."
With one last frightful look at Pegasus, begging to be saved, he did as she threatened and with a herculean effort, forced his throat to contract and swallow the contents. He coughed harshly and gulped down the rather large glass of water that they had thankfully given him.
"There, now was that so difficult?" Madoka tilted her head as her lips curled into an innocent smile. She passed the WD tip back to Tsubasa. "Kept it on hand would you, please?"
Gingka could have sworn he saw his silver haired friend smile sadistically. Or maybe that was just the paranoia setting in. Yeah, that was it. The same paranoia that had lead him to believe Yu and Masamune were playing an illegal gambling game.
"But I'm sure Gingka will be more corporative tomorrow," Madoka paused, eyeing him. "Riigggghhttt, Gingka?"
"Y-yeah, w-whatever you say, Madoka," Gingka gulped, sweat starting to make his shirt stick uncomfortably to his back.
Slowly but surely, even if they had to tie Pegasus to rope suspended in front of a treadmill, they'd find ways to motivate the red haired blader. Madoka smirked in a way very unlike her, she was starting to enjoy this.
If Gingka was scared before, he was beyond terrified now. Now, he didn't even know if he ever wanted to eat another burger again if it was going to lead to this.
Were diets supposed to be this scary?