Okay, here is another chapter for my lovely reviewers :)

Yes, I had this before, I was so excited!

I said this was going to be Orochimaru, so Orochimaru it is

Orochimaru had a fair amount of experience with Uchiha, on missions and day to day life, and he was close to the clan, which he had worked hard and long to be considered a fellow by the uptight and close knit clan. He was interested. Interested in their eyes, which could see the chakra course through the body, interested in their jutsus, interested in each aspect of the clan that churned out prodigies.

Individually, he could not decide wether to be amused or irritated-or worried- by Machiko Uchiha.

She was an aberration, that was clear. She was loud, obnoxious, open.

She called him a snake pedo. Why would she even call him that?

If it was just that, he'd brush it off as just a personality quirk, and leave it at that.

But she seemed to have knowledge of his experiments, seemed to fear him more then just his appearance, as she would flee when he came to speak to her father, would back against the wall when he was discussing with her mother.

One time, while Shouri-san was on a mission, and Noriko-san had gone to the kitchen to make tea (she had been an impressive kunochi once upon a time, before a leg wound had made her retire) and Machiko had been staring, terrified at him.

It both confused and irked him.

She had stood up, hands at her sides, until she raised her hand and pointed.

"Look." She deadpanned. "A preteen Uchiha."

Orochimaru stared at her, briefly wondering exactly what was he considered by the Uchiha.

He was not a pedophile. It was research!
"I can tell you're thinking it's research, but you just want my body!" Machiko had cried out, pointing dramatically at Orochimaru.

Orochimaru spluttered.

"You suck on children's necks! That is so perverted!" She declared, backing away.

Two things rushed through his mind.

How did she know about the cursed seal. It's in the first stages of development, I haven't told anyone!

and

I am not a pedophile, no matter what you say Jiraya. You're the pervreted one!

"I'm afraid you're mistaken, Machiko-chan." Orochimaru said smoothy, narrowing his eyes at her.

How did this little girl know?

"That's not was Jiraya-sama says."

Orochimaru blinked.

He groaned.

Of course it was Jiraya. Why did I think anything different. He groaned in his head.

Honestly, the man should know by now he was the perverted one.

"Orochimaru-sama, Kaa-san needed to rest, so I brought you the tea."

A soft voice cut through the silence, and Machiko's twin (Mikoto, if he remembered correctly) set down a tray beside him, bowing. She would be an impressive kunochi, if only she had-

"Mikoto, get away from the pedophile!" Machiko shrieked, racing towards her and pushing her out of the door.

She turned back.

"Enjoy your tea and eggs." Machiko deadpanned, then flew out of the room, leaving Orochimaru sitting with a cup of tea and cold eggs.

Cold eggs.

"Jiraya I will kill you." Orochimaru hissed.

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

"I didn't do it" Jiraya cried out in alarm when he saw his teammate coming, killing intent rolling off him.

"Didn't do what?!" Orochimaru gritted out.

"I don't know, but when you're ready to kill, the best thing is to deny it."

"You told your student I was a pedophile."

"Minato?" Jiraya asked, confusion marring his features "Or Machiko?"

"Machiko."
Jiraya threw his hands up in surrender. "Okay, if it was Minato, it'd probably be my fault, but I swear, Machiko was like this when I got her!"

"Do something about your student then!"
Jiraya blinked. "Like what."

Orochimaru stopped, thinking.

"I can train her for a day, so she'll see I'm not a pedophille." Orochimaru said decisivley.

Jiraya looked sheepish.
"Can't, I promised her to never let you train her."

"What, why?!" Orochimaru snapped.

"She showed me a jutsu she created-well, she said she stole it from someone who isn't born, but-"
"What jutsu?" Orochimaru asked, more interested. So the girl could create her own jutsu?
"Sexy no jutsu." Jiraya replied.

There was a moment of silence.

"Jiraya, she is a five year old girl. What did you-"
"I swear I did nothing, she was working on it before I started training her!" Jiraya said defensively.
"Jiraya she is five."

"It's just her turning into a naked women!" Jiraya cried out.

"….."
"…."

"What the hell is wrong with you Jiraya." Dear Kami, if Orochimaru was a pedo, then what was Jiraya?
"Nothing! Although, she did suggest if I taught her to make shadow clones, she could do a Sexy Harem no jutsu." Jiraya said, gazing off, lost in thought.

Orochimaru paused. "Can she do the Shadow clone?" He asked, curious now.

"Yeah, taught her." Jiraya said airily

Hmm, so Machiko manipulated Jiraya. Orochimaru mused to himself. Clever.

"She's used it to play pranks around the village." Jiraya said cheerfully.

Orochimaru took it all back.

"But." Jiraya said, growing serious. "She did bring Minato to me. He's a prodigy, that kid-almost as much as her. She's way too smart, too. You know the prophecy? Machiko told me 'I'm not the child in the prophecy, but Minato could be.' She's a good kid." Jiraya said.

Orochimaru was satisfied for the moment, except for one thing.

"Did you tell her I like eggs but dislike cold food?"

"Uh….why?"
"She gave me cold eggs."

Jiraya burst into laughter.
"Shut it, Jiraya!"

So read and review! Next chapter is Tsunade!