FORTY-FOUR

Friday, 21 November 1944

Thursday passed in a blur. Even if they hadn't wanted to keep to themselves, everyone was giving the two of them a wide berth as the rumor mill went into full effect. From the snippets of whispers she had managed to catch, the most popular one was that the three of them were involved in some sort of love triangle. She had balked when she first heard it, hating how close to home it was, even if love definitely wasn't the right word for it.

It was obvious Draco had heard the rumors too. She could tell in the way he watched her when he thought she wasn't looking. In the way he only spoke to her if he needed to. There was something off between them despite what they had confessed to each other the night before. Aside from her parents and Harry and Ron in a platonic way, she had never told anyone that she loved them. She had imagined that when she did, the feeling would be overwhelming. That the relationship between her and the other person would feel completed and solid. Right now, she felt as though they had taken a giant step backwards.

When they returned to the common room after dinner, Hermione had had enough of his mood and just retreated to her room. She curled up as tightly as she could around her pillow and just stared at the canopy until she drifted off to sleep. She hadn't even woken in the middle of the night to appease her temptation of try out more Grey magic or visit Riddle in the infirmary.

The following day went about the same as usual. The only difference was that, out of habit, Hermione found herself coming out into the common room near midnight. Last she had heard, Riddle was still in the hospital wing which left her unsure of if she should even bother going to the Astronomy Tower. If she missed a night of observation it wouldn't matter in the long run. It was also strange to note that Draco wasn't reading by the fire. She wondered if he had assumed she wouldn't be going and it left a little hurt that he hadn't even bothered to come out and check on her.

She frowned in the direction of the boy's corridor and after a split second decision, she cast the necessary charms and marched down to his dorm. She didn't even bother knocking before she barged in and shut the door behind her. Draco was sitting on the edge of his bed with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands. His shoes were off and his tie was hanging on the bedpost, but other than that, he was still fully dressed.

"Did you mean it?" she asked.

He had looked up in surprise at her intrusion and then stood at her words. "Mean what?"

A hot well of tears stung her eyes and she bit the inside of her cheek to keep herself from crying. "When you said it back to me," she said. "Did you mean it? Or did you just say it because I said it?" She held his gaze, but when he didn't say anything, she felt the need to keep talking lest she fall apart in front of him. "Because if you didn't mean it, you shouldn't have said it. You could have said thank-"

He quelled her rambling by putting his lips over hers after a quick two strides forward. He pulled her against him, one arm behind her back and the other cupping her face and sliding back towards her hair. She surrendered to his touch, her hands clutching at his side, fisting his shirt. His lips tugged and nipped at hers, his tongue darting out to soothe the aches he left behind. When he had successfully taken all the breath from her lungs, he pulled back, but kept his forehead against hers.

"I fucking meant it."

She sighed in relief and tightened her hold on his shirt. She closed her eyes and let the tears glide down her cheeks. He pulled her even closer and she buried her head against his chest while his rested above hers. He let her cry silently against him for a few moments, stroking her back idly and massaging the back of her head.

"Do you regret it?" she asked.

He stilled around her for a moment and then pulled away enough to look at her, his knuckles going under her chin to tilt her head up. "Do you?"

"No."

"Then why are you asking me?"

She swallowed hard. "You've been keeping your distance from me since Wednesday night."

"Not because I don't love you."

"Then wh-"

"Because loving you is bloody terrifying."

Hermione went still, her lips parted from being interrupted. She had not been expecting that answer in the slightest.

"You're everything I was taught to fear and told to hate. You were the first Muggle-born I had ever met and you changed my perspective immediately. I wish I was half as brave and smart as you are, Hermione. I wish that I was more deserving of your love. You make me want to be better; do better. And it's bloody terrifying because I know I'm just going to let you down in the end."

A slow smile took hold of her lips as a few more tears slid down her face to join the rest that were still drying on her skin. "Do you remember when you asked what my hypothetical choice would be?"

"Hermione-"

"No, let me finish," she said, her eyes pleading for him to not interrupt again. He stiffened, but gave a nod. "You were upset when I asked you never to make me choose. You thought that by me asking that of you meant that I would never choose you."

He gave a curt nod.

"Asking me to choose who to save should the occasion arise would be like asking me who I loved more. That's something I could never answer. I love everyone; friends, family, you; in different ways, but the same amount. If it came down to it, I would do everything in my power to save the most amount of people. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I chose one over the other; no matter who I chose."

"I know," he said, capturing her lips again briefly. "I know and that's why I love you, Hermione. I do, I love you."

"I love you too," she whispered, chasing after his lips and moving her hands to his face to keep him from moving away again. She pushed him back towards the bed. They fell into it, fully clothed, and tangled themselves in one another.

She would worry about what was to come later. For now, she wanted to allow herself a moment to bask in the warmth that was Draco's love for her. Despite her brain's best efforts to tell her it wouldn't last forever, she was determined to hold on tight for as long as she could and enjoy it. Cocooned in Draco's vice-like grip, she drifted off to sleep, a smile on her face.

Hermione jolted wake in a state of pure panic. Dread consumed her as beads of cold sweat made her clothes stick to her skin. It took her a moment to realize that it was Draco's body she was coiled around and several deep gulps of air to steady her nerves. When she stopped shaking, she carefully extracted herself from his arms and slid off the bed. She readjusted the canopy and took a moment to stretch her limbs before taking her wand from the nightstand and slipping into the adjoined bathroom.

She relieved herself and then washed her hands before turning her wand on herself to get rid of the sweat and freshen herself up. She then splashed some cold water on her face and stared at her reflection for a moment. Her mind wandered to the girl she used to be; the one that had been bouncing up and down in the backseat of her parents' car on the way to King's Cross. The one that had been bursting to get her hands on all knowledge related to magic; to put her wand to use and do good things in the world. She could sort of still see that side of herself in the mirror, but it was buried deep. Now she was just a girl trying to survive and protect those close to her.

She turned away and took a deep breath. Careful not to disturb Draco, she opened the door as quietly as she could and strode back into the room. After only a few steps, she froze in the center of the room as the dread roared back to life inside of her. Something in the air shifted and even though her eyes were cast down to the floor she could tell that he was there.

She swallowed hard and slowly brought her gaze up until brown clashed with dark grey in the near darkness of the room. Her mouth went dry as they stared at each other, the silence stretching around them and thickening to the point where she could feel it settling against her skin. "You… Y-you're back."

"An astute observation," he said, his voice flat.

"A-are you-"

"Drop the act, Hermione. I heard you loud and clear as my life's blood was staining the ground around me." He took a step towards her and she flinched in fear, but didn't move back. "Imagine my surprise when I slipped into your mind to discover you contemplating using your newfound magic to further aide Draco's spell in killing me faster. To prevent the arrival of the help you sent him to get." He reached her and wasted no time in shoving his hand into her hair, pulling it painfully after wrapping it in his fist. "The magic that I have been kind enough to help you learn."

"I'm sorry," she whispered, hissing in pain as he tightened his hold even further on her hair. "I didn't mean it." She blinked against tears, her eyes flickering towards the bed where Draco was, hoping that he was still asleep. "Please, don't-"

"I believe I was right in my assessment of you in the hut. How else would you explain your behavior, Hermione? Tell me, were you thinking of my hand in your cunt instead of Draco while he fucked you on that desk? Did the release he gave you ease the ache I left by denying you?"

She stumbled back in response of being shoved away the moment the words left his mouth. He turned away from her and carded a hand through his hair. She placed a hand over her heart, feeling it hammer away beneath her fingers. She took a half step forward only to stop in fear as Riddle turned towards Draco's bed. "No," she whispered, her voice trembling like her body. "No, please don't. I-I'll do anything."

He stopped his advances towards the bed. He huffed smugly and then turned to face her a moment later. "He deserves everything I want to do to him. That spell was darker than anything I have seen in a long time. Certainly not something taught in Hogwarts. He nearly killed me."

She took another half step forward, her hand outstretched tentatively before it dropped back to her side. "Please, Riddle. D-don't hurt him. I'll do anything you want. Anything."

He held her gaze, his eyes flashing with triumph at the thought of finally getting what he truly wanted from her. "Prove it."

She hesitated out of fear. Fear in knowing that when she moved, it would be sealing her fate. She knew this was what she had to do to protect Draco. At least until they either were able to get home or until she figured out how to harness the Grey magic and wield it without nearly dying each time. With a deep breath and a mental push to shove thoughts away, she stalked forward with false confidence, refusing to take her eyes off of Riddle.

When she was close enough to feel his breath warming her face, she sank to her knees before him. The look on his face was akin to the one he had while he watched her touch herself in the hut. Her fingers shook uncontrollably as she brought her hands up to his trousers, the belt buckle clanking loudly in the otherwise quiet of the room as she undid it. She continued to hold his gaze, the intensity of his hunger awakening something inside of her that colored her face with shame.

As she freed him from his clothes, his bottom lip disappeared between his teeth and his right hand came to rest on the top of her head. She closed her eyes then and parted her lips to take him into her mouth. It took a moment before saliva appeared and he hissed at the warmth of her mouth. She let her hands rest on his thighs, anchoring her as she alternated her techniques. With each bob of her head, swirl of her tongue, or hollowing of her cheeks, Riddle would hiss and sigh above her as well as tighten his hold on her hair.

Even as his presence slipped into her mind, she had forced all thoughts of Draco to disappear. The only thing she allowed herself to repeat was a silent plea for him not to wake up. For him to not see her like this. It was one thing for Riddle to call her a whore; she had all but made herself one by agreeing to do anything in exchange for deadly retaliation, but the thought of Draco seeing her in that light made her stomach flip.

She could tell when Riddle was close. His hips began to buck, shoving himself further into her throat. She closed her mind off and forced herself to relax. That the more she opened herself to him, the quicker he would finish. The sooner it would be over and she could wrap up this moment in a book and bury it deep within her mental library.

With one final thrust deep into her mouth, yanking her face forward to hold her there, Riddle came. She breathed through her nose as his release poured down her throat in hot, thick spurts. She was able to take most of it, but she could feel some slipping out the corners of her lips. Finished, he shoved her away from him and took off towards the bathroom without saying anything to her.

Hermione sat back against the bed Draco still slept in and used one hand to wipe at the tears and the other to remove the traces of Riddle from her skin. When she felt as though her lips would fall off, she got to her feet and took a step towards the door, only to feel a hand on her wrist. She jumped and turned to see Draco pulling her back into bed.

Her lips parted to argue that she wanted to go back to her own room, but he prevented any words by capturing her lips with his. She went still beneath him, squeezing her eyes shut as his tongue slipped beyond her parted lips to take the place where Riddle's cock had just been. Tears streamed from her eyes, spilling back into her hair as she forced herself to kiss him back, hoping that he wouldn't be able to taste the regret among the other things weighing her down her tongue.

"Don't go," he whispered, pulling back enough to let them breathe.

Unable to speak, she nodded and allowed him to wrap himself around her again like he had when they first went to sleep earlier that night. She wondered if he heard the bathroom door open or any of the sounds that Riddle made as he slipped into his own bed.

Hermione retreated to the recesses of her mind and held onto Draco as tight as she could manage. She hoped that when she woke the next morning all of this would have been a bad dream and ignoring the part of her brain that told her she knew better.

As if to make sure she never forgot, his voice filtered through her thoughts just before she drifted off into a fitful sleep.

You belong to me now.