"That was far too close." Said Obi-Wan. "You could've killed me."
"Well EX-CUUUSE ME!" Said
Ne'zzakin, somewhat becoming angry. "I was only trying to get the bad guys!"
"And there's another problem." Said Obi. "You've gotta control your temper. It's not right for a Jedi to
be angry--leads em straight to the Dark Side."
"...okay.." said Ne'zzakin.
"Now..." said Obi. "Look me in the eye and promise me you won't turn
to the Dark Side."
Ne'zzakin sighed. He stared at Obi's ironically tiny eyes and waited until Obi placed his glasses back on. The zucchini smiled.
"Don't worry!" Said Ne'zzakin. "I
promise I won't do anything bad!"
--
"WoOOOOOWWWWW!!"
Ne'zzakin strolled down the crowds of fans, followed by the rest of the Jedi Council.
"NE'ZZAKIIIIIINNN!!!" Shouted
somebody. "I LOVE YOUUUU!!!"
"Yeah, me too!" Replied Ne'zzakin. "CAN I HAVE YOUR AUTOGRAPH?!" Exclaimed a person holding a giant
piece of steel. Ne'zzakin, without
saying another word, etched his name into the steel, making that person swoon and faint.
"I feel good, I
knew that I would
now
I feel good, I knew
that I would now
So good, so good,
I got you
Wo! I feel nice,
like sugar and
spice
I feel nice, like
sugar and spice
So nice, so nice, I
got you!"
"NO, PLEASE, HAVE MERCY!!"
Exclaimed a voice from outside.
"NE'ZZAKIN!!" Exclaimed Obi-Wan. "IS EVERYTHING OKAY?!!"
Obi-Wan burst through the door to find Ne'zzakin lying on top of a pea
youngling, baring his lightsaber. Ne'zzakin looked at the child, then at Obi. He started tickling the child, prompting riotous laughter from the young Jedi protegé.
"Yep!" Said Ne'zzakin. "We're doing great!" Obi closed the door and walked away. He did not have to walk far when he noticed
something was off.
"Why does it smell like...burnt flesh?"
"When I hold
you in my arms
I know that I can
do no wrong
And when I hold
you in my arms
My love won't do
you no harm
And I feel nice,
like sugar and
spice
I feel nice, like
sugar and spice
So nice, so nice, I
got you"
"COME...ON, MISTER WHISKERS!" Exclaimed Ne'zzakin.
"Please get him down!" Said the little girl.
"ALMOST...GOTIT...THERE!"
Ne'zzakin fell to the ground, face-first, holding the little girl's Lothcat.
"Thank you so much, Ne'zzakin!"
She exclaimed, happily.
Ne'zzakin stood up, somewhat scratched and bloody from the
animal.
"All...in a day's work...honey.."
Then, he plummeted to the ground again, this time on his back.
(Music ends)
One day, Ne'zzakin was walking through the streets of Coruscant with Padmé.
"So, um, sugarplum?" Said Padmé.
"Yes, dear?" Said Ne'zzakin.
"There's...something I have to tell you."
"You can tell me anything, honey!" Said Ne'zzakin, smiling. "I am your
husband, after all!"
"...yeah, well, you're also a daddy."
Ne'zzakin stopped. His eyes widened, and he shook his head.
"...say what." He said.
"I'm trying to say that I'm..." Padmé paused.
"Yeah?"
"I'm..."
Ne'zzakin listened intently.
"I'm...pregnant." Said Padmé. She unbuttoned her jacket to reveal a
small bump.
Ne'zzakin's eyes widened. He laughed, loudly, and jumped around.
"YYYYYYYYIPPPEEEE!!!!!" He exclaimed. "IM' GONNA BE A DAD!!!"
R2 beeped, and opened up an explosion of confetti from one of his compartments. Ne'zzakin cackled happily and jumped around with R2, occasionally kissing and hugging Padmé's stomach. Then he stopped, and placed both hands on his wife's midriff.
"Hey there, sport!" He said. "It's your old man. You won't be out for another six months so sit tight!"
Padmé laughs. Suddenly, a huge
ship drives right in front of them, and from within yells a very familiar;
"AUUUUGH HELP ME IVE BEEN
KIDNAAAAPPED!!!"
Ne'zzakin stares out, and looks at
Padmé and R2.
"Sorry, babe, duty calls..."
R2-Pea2 shot out a grappling hook. With a 'zip!', Ne'zzakin swung across the buildings, R2 screeched the whole way.