Notes: wow, there were certainly points at which i thought i'd never get this done... and a 9-month incubation period is pretty darn close to "never being done" in my eyes... i've done minimal proofreading on the final draft and hopefully i've reduced mistakes as much as possible, although of course some of them might've still eluded me up to this point... in the meantime, i hope the events of this chapter are engaging enough to be worth the wait.
also, happy belated two-year anniversary to this story... late, of course, just like everything else i do!
Umi slid her front door shut, turning to face a rapidly darkening sky. People were already out and about, some of them festive, most of them bundled in layers of warm clothing. She whipped out her phone, re-reading messages from earlier in the day to make sure she was following the plan.
Nico: so what time tonight? 7:30?
Nozomi: sounds like a plan
Honoka: yesss! i'm so excited!
General agreements were made by the rest of the group, but Umi glossed over these in favor of the message that she received not minutes later, in a separate chat.
Honoka: Umi-chan Kotori-chan you guys wanna meet up at my place before 7:30?
Honoka: it's been a while since it was just the three of us ya know?
Honoka: and we can just go out together when everyone else is ready
Honoka: :D
By the time Umi had seen this message, she'd already been spoken for.
Kotori: Sounds wonderful~ How's 6 sound?
Honoka: can't wait!
Kotori: Umi-chan and I will see you then :)
Umi sighed as she checked the time on her phone. 5:55. She had no reason to worry this time, and the three of them coming together would only be a cause to celebrate.
She lingered on her doorstep a moment longer. Absently, she thumbed back through this chat's history, and it didn't take long for her to realize that it was last active almost two years ago.
Of course…
And yet, here was Honoka, reviving it like it was the most natural thing in the world. Umi couldn't help but smile.
A sudden draft almost dislodged her beanie. When Umi looked up to adjust it, she realized that she was already in front of Honoka's house. She knocked before she had the time to second-guess herself.
After what sounded like a minor commotion, the door opened. Honoka stood there, all smiles, with an undone scarf draped around her neck. "Umi-chan!" Her smile grew wider still, and she grasped Umi's hand and pulled her in. "Are you ready?"
"For what?" Umi glanced down at their intertwined hands, then back up to Honoka's expectant face.
"For a whole lotta fun! We've gotta catch up, you know?"
Umi let Honoka lead her through the vacant first floor and up the stairs, silent all the while. She had almost been expecting her to say "For the best night of your life!", and tried to suppress the dregs of disappointment that started to well up when Honoka hadn't.
Things were different now, but the eerie similarities of between the two meetings, two years apart, weren't lost on her.
Honoka burst into her room with Umi in tow. "And just like that, we're reunited!" she announced.
Kotori sat at the lone desk in the room, looking up when Honoka declared their presence. "Umi-chan!" She broke out into a warm smile. "How have you been?"
"Not bad." Umi picked out a safe, non-committal response. "It's been a while since we were all together," she added, glancing at Honoka.
"Right?" Kotori agreed. "How do you want to celebrate, Honoka-chan?"
With two pairs of eyes now on her, Honoka rubbed the back of her neck. "Honestly, I was just gonna go out and spend a bunch of money on food while we look at the Christmas lights."
Umi and Kotori shared an amused look. "I suppose I can't argue with that," Umi said. "For now, how about we take a picture?"
"That's a great idea! Our first picture in two years…" Kotori sighed. "Oh, goodness, I hope this doesn't show how much weight I've put on in that time."
"Hey, you don't get to complain!" Honoka giggled. "You know how hard it is, being surrounded by sweets all day? I don't go out much, either…"
Umi rolled her eyes, smiling all the while. "You two look perfectly fine. Here, I'll take the picture." As she took her phone from the table, she was greeted with a notification on her home screen. "Oh, excuse me for a moment." She entered the password to see who had messaged her.
Nikaido Marika-san:Merry Christmas, Sonoda-san! Hope you're enjoying the break! Okay, that's all~
Nikaido Marika-san: oh, if you're at home, that means you might be hanging out with μ's, right?
Nikaido Marika-san: if it's not a problem…
Nikaido Marika-san: can i have a picture? :DDDD
Nikaido Marika-san: i'm not gonna wave it around to anyone, i promise! :)
"Who's 'Nikaido Marika-san?'"
Umi jumped at the voice in her ear, glancing around to see that Honoka was peering over her shoulder, scrutinizing her phone with narrowed eyes. Seemingly oblivious to the invasion of privacy she was committing, she looked up at Umi. "She a friend, or…?"
Umi shrugged, mulling over just how true the designation was. "I suppose, yes."
Honoka broke into a smile. "See, you're doing just fine for yourself! You've made friends over there."
"That's… more the exception than the norm." Umi's voice dropped to little more than a murmur; they were once again straying into dangerous territory if she were to dwell on her social life, or lack thereof.
A shadow of sympathy passed over Honoka's face, but it was replaced with a newfound determination as soon as it appeared. "Well, what are we waiting for? Let's send her a picture! She likes μ's, right?" She lifted Umi's phone from her hands, beckoning both girls closer as she posed for the phone's camera.
They bunched together under the camera lens. Umi took in their on-screen smiles, wondering for all of a moment how genuine they were, before the screen flashed and the moment passed.
"It's pretty amazing to see people still like us after all this time." Honoka handed Umi her phone, her smile still lingering. "Even though we were only around for a year."
"That means we must have done something right." Umi's laugh died in her throat as she reviewed the picture. "Ah, can we retake this? I blinked."
"Hmm…?" Honoka grinned, a teasing glint in her eyes, and Umi shrunk back on instinct. "Sure, why not?" When Umi offered no resistance, Honoka took her phone again and promptly pointed it back towards its owner. She tapped away at the screen, humming a merry tune as she snapped candid after candid.
It took Umi far too long to realize what Honoka was doing; by the time she did, a number of unflattering pictures were already saved to her camera roll. "Hey! Not that kind of picture!" She grabbed for her phone, but Honoka reacted quicker and held it out of reach, still tapping away.
"Why, you…" She sprang to her feet. Honoka did the same.
"You'll never catch me!" With each swipe forward that Umi took, Honoka backed up, swinging her phone above her head all the while, her shoulders shaking with mirth.
Laughing, she chased Honoka around the room, each of them almost tripping over the many obstacles present within the small space allotted, which included Honoka's bed, her desk, her bookshelf, and each other.
"You two probably shouldn't run around in here…" Kotori called, but her plea was ignored.
Through it all, Honoka never stopped taking pictures of her. Her phone's storage space was surely suffering.
"You can't run forever!" Umi saw her opportunity. She leapt at Honoka, and with a surprised yelp, the two of them tumbled onto Honoka's bed. Umi emerged triumphant, huffing from the surprising amount of exertion she'd gone through, sitting on top of the other girl and finally earning control over what was rightfully hers. "These pictures will never see the light of day." She took to marking the myriad candids for deletion.
"Uh…" Honoka piped up from below her. "You can delete them, but can you..."
"Hm?" My face in this picture could be nightmare fuel, almost…
"Can you get off me first?"
An intense flush overtook Umi's face as she realized that she was still sitting on top of Honoka, who wouldn't look her in the eye. She scratched at the side of her face, but even that couldn't conceal the obvious blush that she and Umi now shared.
The last time I was here, we -
Umi half-jumped, half-fell off of Honoka and the bed, any potential responses choked by the mortification that colored her face. Only after Honoka got up and put on a nervous smile did she manage to swallow the lump in her throat. "Sorry."
A sigh brought their collective attention to the third party in the room. "I told you two not to run around. What if someone had gotten hurt?" Kotori shook her head, but her smile interfered with the admonishment in her voice.
Honoka shrugged. "I didn't think that would awaken the beast." She smirked at said beast.
Umi didn't fall for the obvious bait, for she was too relieved that Kotori had the sense to defuse their situation. "You know how much I dislike pictures. Especially non-posed ones."
They returned to their seats at the table while Umi attached the intended photo for her college acquaintance. After her back-and-forth with Honoka, she minded her blinking in this picture much less.
"Did she like it?" Honoka asked once Umi put down her phone.
"I just sent it. She probably won't respond right away - "
Bzzt.
She tried to ignore Honoka's smug grin.
Nikaido Marika-san: ahhhhhh!
Nikaido Marika-san: you three are so cuteee!
Nikaido Marika-san: thank you! you've just made my Christmas
Nikaido Marika-san: \ (^ ^) /
"Yeah. She liked it."
Umi made a mental note to thank Kotori later. Considering the… dangerous situation that she had found herself in as a result of her and Honoka's roughhousing, the implications of such could have easily permeated the rest of their night, and she would have blamed herself for needlessly making everything awkward.
Instead, Kotori had kept them both occupied by directing the topics of conversation, even though Umi caught herself looking at Honoka's bed multiple times. Whether they shared stories of Umi's off-kilter teaching assistant, Honoka's favorite regular customers, or Kotori's two-faced classmates, Umi found herself hanging onto every word. It was so easy for her to forget that almost two years had passed since they had last done this. She did forget it, more than once, in the midst of their casual conversation. A wistful smile crossed her face, while she superimposed days past over the scene before her.
I've missed this.
As the scheduled meeting time drew closer, she could see Honoka growing more restless. First, the hints were subtle; her blue eyes flickered towards her phone with increasing frequency until she ultimately caved, snatching it up and thumbing through.
"We can head out early if you'd like," Umi offered.
"Huh?" Honoka lowered her phone. "No, it's fine! Just checking if anyone else is there yet."
"I wouldn't mind. The lights probably look very nice by now." Umi followed suit, switching on her own screen to check the time. They had about a half-hour left to wait.
"No, really! We still need to catch up! Right, Kotori-chan?" She looked to the girl in question for support.
"I don't mind either way." Kotori shrugged.
"I got it!" Honoka's hand shot up in the air, drawing the attention of everyone in the room. "How about we each say the most interesting thing that's happened to us since we graduated?"
"We haven't already?" Umi frowned. The stories they'd exchanged were certainly interesting, or more accurately, entertaining. Was that what Honoka meant? Had she keyed into the difference between the two?
"Not yet!" Honoka insisted. "No offense, Umi-chan, but if your most interesting college story is a weirdo T.A, then…"
Umi raised an eyebrow, daring Honoka to continue with that claim.
"...It's college, you know? College!" Honoka seemed to get the hint; her excitement withered slightly and she settled on a less insulting alternative. "You have all the freedom in the world!"
Umi looked away. You're going to be so disappointed. Yet she didn't have the heart to turn Honoka down, in part because she could turn the question back to the very person who asked. "If I think of something, I'll tell you," she shrugged.
This seemed to placate Honoka for the moment, for she turned her attention to the third girl in the room. "Do you have anything, Kotori-chan?" she asked.
"The most interesting thing?" Kotori gave her a long shrug, her eyes flitting about. Umi and Honoka watched her expectantly. "The first thing that comes to mind is something I'm planning. Does that count?"
"Sure!"
Kotori made a face, one that Umi couldn't interpret on its own. Umi narrowed her eyes, anticipating that this wouldn't, necessarily, be good news. "Well… I'm thinking about going overseas to finish my undergraduate program."
"Really?!" Honoka brought her hands down on the desk and leaned forward. She didn't seem to share Umi's uncertainty. "That's awesome, Kotori-chan! How long have you been thinking about it?"
"A while," Kotori said, her tone still neutral. "Nothing's final yet, but… I have another year to think about it, since applications are usually due in November."
Umi couldn't shake her unpleasant anticipation, and she elected to clear it up as soon as possible. "It's a momentous decision, so it's good that you're taking your time to think," she put in. "Is there something stopping you?"
Kotori looked to her. "There is."
Honoka leaned back, her hands falling into her lap. Dropping her voice, she asked, "What is it?" She seemed to pick up on the sudden mood shift. "It's an amazing opportunity."
"It is, but it comes with a lot of… conditions?" Kotori tried. "Things that I'm not really looking forward to."
Umi looked at Honoka, wondering if she should intervene. She immediately reprimanded herself for the thought. Honoka had the capacity to say the right thing in most sensitive situations. Their… experience last night on the rooftop was proof of that.
"Like what?" Honoka asked. In this case, Umi hardly needed to worry, since that was the obvious follow-up. The overall direction of this conversation, however, was a different matter.
"Well, I wouldn't mind finishing my undergrad here in Tokyo, but initially I stayed in Japan so I could gain an understanding of the environment I'd be working in. While fashion school here isn't world-famous, that also means it's less intense." Kotori, to her credit, never stumbled over her words or paused to think. It was clear to Umi that she'd put a lot of thought into this.
"So, I told myself that if I couldn't handle how they do things here, I wouldn't have a chance overseas," she continued.
"And after two years?"
"Well…" she looked away, smiling wryly. "Just because it's less intense doesn't mean it's not intense. I think I've told both of you that I've seen a lot of people break down already?" Umi and Honoka nodded. "If it's tough here, it has to be no less than cutthroat in Europe." She laughed, though her eyes told the two girls this was anything but amusing. "I might be too soft to survive over there."
Umi could only stare. She struggled for some sort of response, but seeing the way that Kotori cast her eyes down towards the table, her fingers drumming and restless in her lap, she knew she couldn't offer any sort of encouragement that surpassed the territory of shallow platitudes. "I'm sure you can do it?" No, that was too generic. "Don't worry?" She knew from experience that telling someone not to feel a certain way would only deprecate their current mindset further. Especially when the person in question already knew it was best not to wallow in their own negative cycle of thoughts.
Umi stole a glance at Honoka, and in that very moment she knew that Honoka was just as lost as she. Her blue eyes sent a silent plea back, begging her to save the situation.
Once again, Kotori had to come to their rescue. She brought a gentle fist down onto the table, making the other two girls jump. "Ah, but that doesn't mean I'm not going to try!" A shred of determination crept into her normally dainty voice. "'Keep pushing yourself,' right? That's what you two would tell me!"
"…Yes, of course." Umi echoed the sentiment, hoping it didn't sound too hollow in the stretch of silence that proceeded Kotori's expression of faith. "If you think you can handle it."
"I believe you can, Kotori-chan!" Honoka seemed to compensate for the resolve that Umi lacked, and she grasped Kotori's hand in her own.
"Thanks, you two," Kotori offered both of them a warm smile. "It's not guaranteed that I get admitted even if I do apply, but I guess nothing bad will come out of submitting the application." She then flushed, putting a hand to her cheek. "I think I've talked a lot about myself," she giggled. "I'm passing off the baton to… you!" She pointed. "Your turn, Umi-chan!"
With two pairs of eager eyes now on her, Umi had to concede. "It's only fair. For me, it's…" Unfortunately, she was still at a loss for what she designated as her "most interesting thing." The obvious answer that came to mind was her falling-out with Honoka, but to describe that as merely "interesting," to even consider that painfully neutral word in the context of Honoka's question, was both disrespectful and heartless to everyone involved.
The only event that remained as a plausible choice was one that both of Umi's friends already knew about, but it was safer to discuss as well, if only by the process of attrition. "I'm sorry to repeat myself, but it really is the song for me." After a moment, she added in a more vulnerable aside, "Nothing else comes close."
Her declaration was met with silence. Not willing to elaborate, she merely watched Kotori, and even more so Honoka, piece together the implication of her statement.
My life since I graduated high school has been unbearably lonely.
The song itself was born of this sentiment. Umi knew this, and she knew these two girls knew it, too. Knowing this, she still grappled with the possibility that the song meant something more, that somehow, she'd included another meaning subconsciously. As the silence dragged on, she realized that she'd just placed herself in a perfect position for another grilling.
"I really, really want to hear it, Umi-chan." This time, Honoka broke the silence, her voice soft and almost bashful. "If it means that much to you that you'd put it at your number one spot, anyway."
That's more because I had to eliminate the other contender for that spot, out of necessity. Umi stifled the cynical thought, a more humorous one taking its place. Smiling wryly, she replied, "I take it back: it was difficult to choose between the song and seeing all you girls again."
Honoka giggled, waving a dismissive hand in the air. "Too late! Flattery will get you nowhere with us, Umi-chan!"
Kotori, meanwhile, hummed to herself, an eyebrow quirked in playful thought. "No, no, Umi-chan might be onto something. Can I steal that and use that as my answer instead?"
Honoka gasped in mock horror. "No takebacks!" She couldn't keep up her offended façade for any longer, and a sudden giggle escaped her. That was all it took for the dam to break loose; she burst out laughing, hunching over the table as she clutched at her sides. Exchanging an amused glance, Umi and Kotori fell to the contagious sound as well, with Umi offering herself an internal congratulations on making Honoka laugh so freely.
She'd really missed this.
When the laughter petered out, Umi returned to the subject at hand. "Expect it soon. Maki told me that she scheduled our first recording sessions for after Christmas."
"That's amazing!" Honoka grinned, and now she repeated the same gesture she'd used on Kotori earlier, leaning all the way across the table to grasp Umi's hands. "You know, I didn't know if I'd hear your songwriting again. Hearing how something still pushes you to write music… well, I just know I'll love it."
Umi stared into Honoka's eyes, which belied nothing but a quiet determination. For her? She didn't know if she deserved it. Kotori seemed intent to watch the scene unfold this time, as she didn't offer any saving grace in the wake of Honoka's honest admission. Umi was on her own.
The least she could do was return the sentiment. "I didn't have a reason to write," she said, looking down. "Now I do, obviously, but… I agree. I hope this will be a recurring pattern from here on out."
"You haven't lost any of your songwriting talent, from what you showed me," Kotori chose this moment to speak up.
"What?!" Honoka fell back to her seat at the table, looking between her two friends in shock. "You showed Kotori-chan the lyrics and not me?! I'm being robbed!"
Umi grimaced, putting her hands up in an attempt to console Honoka. "I didn't have them on me yesterday. I would have showed you then."
"Fiine," Honoka whined, slumping over the table. "You don't have them on you now, do you?"
Umi shook her head.
"I guess I can wait another day or so…" she muttered, though she sounded reluctant to admit it.
Umi watched Honoka fidget on the table in front of her. It dawned on her that she was the last to fulfill her own request. "What about you, Honoka? What's the most interesting thing that's happened to you?"
Honoka's hand froze in the middle of its way down to the table. She was caught off-guard, and the red that tinted her cheeks told Umi that she knew it. Withering under Umi;s expectant gaze, she squeaked out, "You two have more than enough interesting stuff for the three of us. Combined!"
"Honoka," Umi sighed, "You knew this would come back to you."
"I did!" Honoka's sidetail bounced in her nervousness. She tented her splayed hands together, watching her fingers move as if of their own accord. "I should've gone first. My answer's pretty bad."
"We're not going to judge," Kotori encouraged.
Umi nodded. "You have nothing to worry about."
"Right. Right, right…" Honoka trailed off into murmuring, her fingers still wandering across one another. With her eyes trained downward, she said, her voice none the louder, "Then, for me… It was yesterday. When you came back, Umi-chan."
Umi felt her shoulders tighten. She exchanged the quickest of glances with Kotori, who didn't hide her stare. With Honoka still fidgeting, the onus was on her to respond gracefully. "You need to raise your standards, Honoka."
"You misunderstand, Umi-chan! Shocking, surprising, unexpected, amazing… I couldn't describe any other day like that. But that was the day you came back. It's no contest!"
"That sounds… vaguely positive?" Umi tried to force a smile, given the majority of neutral adjectives that Honoka had used, strong though they were.
"It is!" Honoka nodded so rapidly Umi thought it would be cause for a headache later. "Give yourself more credit, Umi-chan."
As Umi readied another self-deprecating response, all three phones hummed on the desk. Honoka snatched hers up first, unlocking it to reveal their shared group chat. "It's Nico-chan!" she declared before the other two could even open the app. "She's ready! Let's go!"
Honoka was up and out before Umi could blink, the tail end of her scarf disappearing behind the door. The remaining two girls shared a shocked look that soon morphed to amusement. Laughing, they took their time in exiting the room.
Downstairs, Honoka hopped from foot to foot, eyeing Umi and Kotori impatiently. "Come on, you two! Time's a wasting! Everyone else is out already!"
While Kotori offered the necessary apologies, the living room door spread open. "You're going out now, Onee-chan?" Yukiho stepped halfway through the doorframe, peering at the three older girls with a dubious eye. "Oh, Kotori-senpai. Umi-senpai."
Umi stiffened. Yukiho's voice was cordial at first blush, but she now knew better than to let her guard down. She only gave Yukiho a small nod, turning away while Kotori offered a more formal wave.
Honoka beamed at her sister. "Bye, Yukiho! We're off! Merry Christmas and all that!" She grabbed Umi and Kotori by the hands, practically dragging them out the door.
Umi's rational mind was urging her not to turn around as they left, but a twisted curiosity to see through Yukiho's supposed façade made her glance back.
Yukiho hadn't moved, but any semblance of welcoming had disappeared from her face. With an icy cold glare, obvious even from her half-concealed frame, she jabbed two fingers at her own eyes. Then, she used those same fingers to point at Umi.
Umi whipped around as they stepped out into the wintry evening cold, already regretting her impulsive decision.
The timing of the situation was nigh impeccable; just as they rounded the corner to one of the major streets, a collective gasp sounded from the three girls, as well as many of the passerby.
A Christmas tree stood in the pedestrian square, dwarfed by the nearby buildings in height but not in radiance. Countless strings of lights adorned its pines, swathing the tree in a rainbow glow. A large star perched at the tree's apex, but not even this completed the dazzling spectacle the girls saw now. Now, the tree's brilliance illuminated tiny frozen flakes, which now fell to the ground enshrined by light, giving them an almost ethereal glow. Snow.
Honoka was the first to react. She tooko one glacial step forward and reached out to catch the falling snowflakes, holding them up to her face even as they melted into nothing against the warmth of her hands.
"Umi-chan? Kotori-chan?" She turned around to face them. Her voice was quiet, as though she hadn't fully grasped the situation yet. "Are you seeing this?"
She didn't need to ask.
"It's a Christmas miracle…" At first, Honoka's smile was easy to miss, made more so by the low volume of her voice. But it grew, unsteady and unsure, as Umi watched. It was like seeing a defunct lightbulb seeing its first use in years, flickering at first, but eventually finding a steady radiance to project. It was like she was learning to smile, to really smile, all over again. "A Christmas miracle!" Her smile bloomed wider and wider still, and before she knew it, Umi found herself smiling all the same.
Honoka took off down the street ahead of them, her laughter still audible the further she ran. It was an expression of the pure, childlike joy that Umi had always envied in her oldest friend, and one that now made her clutch her heart in relief. It hadn't been completely taken away, after all.
They watched Honoka jump and twirl amidst the falling snow, drawing more than a few glances from the other people that crowded the street.
"It's like she's our daughter," Kotori commented, laughing.
Umi had to giggle a little herself. "I still love that part of her, though."
"How was yesterday? I take it you two have made up?"
Wow. Kotori's all business; right into the topic at hand. "It seems so, but…"
"But what?"
How should she articulate her reservations about last night? What would she start with, especially with someone who, if she were forced to pick, would probably side with the other party?
"Yukiho is scary."
It was perfect in her mind: both a joke and a diversion while Umi pored over the details of last night.
Kotori laughed unsteadily in response. "I can see where she's coming from."
"So can I, but I wish I wasn't on the wrong end of it."
"Or the right end," Kotori pointed out. "Depending on how you look at it."
If she needed confirmation that Kotori had a tendency to side with Honoka, that was it. "Thank you, Kotori." Umi grimaced at her friend's nonchalant expression. "As if I needed another reminder that I'm permanently in the wrong."
Kotori shrugged. "We're on the same page. That's good to see."
Umi mimicked her shrug, choosing to further explain her previous thread of conversation. "I didn't know she was so protective of Honoka. Nor did I know she could speak with such vitriol."
"It's funny how that turned out, is it not? The clumsy older sister and the strict, responsible younger sister. She and Honoka-chan make for quite the comedic duo."
"Yeah, well…" Umi managed a brief, cursory laugh. "I can appreciate the humor more when it's not detrimental to me."
"That's fair." Kotori nodded in what Umi hoped to be sympathy. "Your run-in with the protective imouto aside, what about the rest of the night?" She leaned in slightly, the gesture so covert that Umi wouldn't have taken note of it had it come from anyone else. "I saw how you two were interacting earlier. Outwardly, I saw almost no problems... so how did it go?"
There was no escaping the watchful eye of Kotori. "It didn't go the way I imagined it would go." Umi adjusted her maroon beanie as snowflakes started to settle on her exposed forehead.
"You've had more than a year to play out the scenario in your head," Kotori pointed out. "I'm sure you spent more than a little bit of time doing that."
"Kotori, please don't expose my private thoughts so casually," Umi muttered, staring down at the ground.
"Oh, so I was right?" Kotori's voice was tinged with mirth, and an innocent giggle escaped her. Watching Umi's escalating embarrassment seemed to be an adequate response for her, so she dropped the teasing act. "How did you imagine it would go?" She asked, her voice lowered slightly.
Umi watched as Honoka, lost in the joys of a Christmas Eve snowfall, collided with an innocent couple appreciating the scenery in the middle of the street. Her ginger sidetail bounced up and down as she bowed her head to them in a hurriedly apologetic gesture. "I thought I would be able to apologize for what I did to her, at the very least," Umi said, finally.
"She doesn't need to hear that. She knows you regret what you did."
Umi grimaced on instinct. "I don't like the sound of that, but I'll bite. How do you know that?"
Kotori shrugged. "We've talked about it. A lot."
"Ah…" Umi sighed, trying to ignore how her fingers began to twitch. She was suddenly gripped with the urge to fidget; standing still was almost unbearable. "I knew it."
"We never hated you for it, you know." Kotori placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, and Umi's anxiety was quelled, if only slightly, by the gesture.
"That's… a little surprising."
"Really?"
"I would have hated me, if I was in your place."
"I think all three of us feel at least partly responsible for what happened." Kotori said, her eyes still on Honoka.
"Even you, Kotori?"
Kotori removed her hand. It seemed that it was her turn to fidget, as she ran that same hand repeatedly across the nape of her neck. "I was encouraging her to confess to you. It never occurred to me that you'd react as badly as you did."
This is new information. "That's not your fault, it's -"
"Yours, I know. But I never even considered the possibility that things would go that badly. I think I just wanted to see you two happy, so I didn't want to think about any alternative."
Umi ran an absent hand across her forearm. Kotori's words were far more present in her mind. If they all shared blame in their mess of a situation, then the solution certainly did not lie in the vicious cycle of self-deprecation that Umi was all too familiar with. "Our respective shares of responsibility aren't equal," she said.
"I know," Kotori nodded sagely. "But it might help to know it's not all your fault. Or all your fault and Honoka-chan's fault."
"We're all doing our respective parts to mend this mess, then?"
"Yeah." Kotori beamed at her, and Umi mirrored the gesture with a shadow of a smile. Umi felt a moment of understanding pass between them, and it was comforting to know that Kotori's sympathies weren't completely biased against her.
"So why does Honoka blame herself?"
"She wishes she didn't let it happen." Kotori's smile was gone, replaced by a somber, knowing look. "She thinks she wasn't strong enough."
A nauseating wave of guilt washed over Umi. "Oh, goodness…"
"Yeah."
Umi kicked at the ground, and the little snow that had settled there flew up around her. She kept her eyes glued there, ashamed as she was to meet Kotori's eyes. More shameful still, she didn't have a follow-up response to Kotori's words. It was less of a revelation and more of an unpleasant truth; she'd known, somewhere in the back of her mind, that this was the most likely scenario. Honoka, for all her gusto, had a notable lack of self-worth when it came to failure, and if her feelings towards their fallout were at all similar to Umi's, then she considered it a massive failure.
"Let's sit here while we wait for Honoka-chan." Kotori indicated a vacant bench that they had just walked past. They both brushed off what little snow had accumulated in silence before sitting down. "What did you two actually talk about, then?" she asked once they had both gotten settled.
Umi mulled over last night's events. "Our lives, really," she said, recalling how she had used the same phrase then. "She was being very… cryptic about some things."
Kotori hummed, bemused. "I'm not surprised. There's a lot that she wants to say to you."
"How much of it do you know?" Umi frowned.
"You should hear it from her, remember?"
"Oh, right, right…" Umi muttered, a little grudgingly. "Last night, she brought me to the school roof, and she mostly talked about how our time in μ's is still affecting her."
Kotori's only response was a simple "Ah."
Umi shot her an irritated look, which Kotori either didn't notice or pretended to ignore. "I take it you know about this already?"
"I do."
"How long has this been going on? It's… concerning, to say the least."
Kotori turned to her, her expression completely serious. "She's been saying things like that ever since you left."
"Since I left…?" Umi froze. "You mean to say I did that?"
"Just the opposite, actually."
"I… I don't understand."
"Just think about what's bothering her." Kotori craned her neck, looking in the distance for their mutual friend, the subject of their conversation. Umi joined her, but Honoka was still out of sight. "It's a case of… over-nostalgia, maybe? She's so caught up in the good times that it's affecting her negatively? Is there a word for that?"
"She's wistful." Umi landed on the word immediately.
"That's the one. So, what does any of that have to do with you?"
Umi hesitated. She was starting to key into Kotori's point. "...Well, I was there for all those times as well, but I suppose a lot of her feelings towards the past are out of my control."
"Exactly," Kotori said. "Maybe, through no fault of your own, you leaving finally made Honoka-chan face reality. I think that would have happened regardless of how you left."
"Do you think that's a good thing?"
"I don't know, but we all have to face it, at some point." Kotori's eyes swam with a sadness that Umi couldn't quite place; whether it was for Honoka, Umi, or all three of them, she didn't know. "We can't be kids forever."
Umi chewed on her lower lip, weighing her friend's words. Though she agreed, she wasn't sure how exactly to respond to such a revelatory, yet obvious, declaration. They'd all known, subconsciously. Then, she took in Kotori's perfectly straight back, her sorrowful yet determined gaze, and the overall confident acceptance with which she carried herself.
"Some of us are handling it better than others." The words left her mouth before she could process and filter them in her mind.
Kotori turned to her and smiled. "For now."
Umi returned it with a more grudging smile of her own, then pressed one of her palms to her forehead. Without her noticing, snowflakes had accumulated on her exposed hand during her conversation with Kotori, and she recoiled at the sudden rush of cold water on her head. She promptly shook the droplets off. "She's been struggling so much this whole time. Meanwhile, I was trying to forget about her. I'm the worst."
"You still have time to make up for it."
"Yeah. I'm still not looking forward to that." At this, Umi recalled a shared detail of her two recent landmark conversations, about how Kotori had long known of Honoka's silent struggles. "Have you tried to help her?"
Kotori frowned. Her legs swung aimlessly off the edge of the bench, and Umi had a sudden compulsion to parrot the motion. "Of course I have. I've tried my best, but I don't think it's enough for her."
"Why?"
"I think she needs you," Kotori said, her tone definitive and certain.
"Me?!" Umi was startled. "Again, why?"
Kotori looked down and smoothed out her coat, allowing a tense silence to settle between the two of them before she answered.
"When we were growing up, the two of us were always dragged into whatever Honoka-chan wanted to do. That's how she was: she usually got her way because she always had this aura about her. I always wanted to see what she'd do next. Even if she failed at it. That usually wouldn't stop her; she'd be even more driven to succeed the next time she tried.
"But you could always rein her in if her ideas were too wild, or if she was being unreasonable. I could never do that. I felt like I'd be holding her back, even if it was the right thing to do. And…" she craned her neck, searching for something in the distance. Umi did the same, realizing now that Honoka was completely out of sight. "…and I think she needs someone like that in her life," she continued. "She needs someone to be her voice of reason."
Umi chewed on her lower lip. She wanted to agree completely with Kotori, and she would have by now if this conversation had taken place even a day earlier. But something about her most recent developments made her hesitate. "That's true of the Honoka of before. But… don't you think she's changed? When we met last night, she… She was so…" Umi fumbled for the right words, her hands making useless gestures in her lap. "… contemplative. That's not a word I'd use to describe the old Honoka."
Kotori was silent for a while. She was nodding slowly, but Umi guessed that she was thinking of a counterexample, judging from her now-extended silence. "Do you remember the time that she ran away from home?"
Umi raised an eyebrow. "Was that the third time? Or the sixth, perhaps?"
Kotori tilted her head. "The time where she followed you home from school and declared that she was a member of your family, right in front of your parents."
"Oh, the third time." Honoka's subsequent declarations that she 'didn't know her own family' were a big deal to the nine-year-old Umi, but it all seemed humorous and insignificant to her now. Especially after she'd later found out that the whole spat had its roots in Honoka's neglect for her chores; she was the one at fault and she refused to admit it. "What about it?"
"It's just an example of how she needs you. You talked her down and took her back home, right?"
Umi nodded, unable to stop the smile that had begun to take hold. "She was crying so much while she apologized. She thought there was a legitimate chance they wouldn't take her back."
"But her family didn't even realize she'd run away!" Kotori shook with laughter. "They thought she was just staying at your house for the afternoon."
"They were shocked. Floored. And they were so angry." Umi laughed along, allowing the now-amusing memories to wash over her for no more than a moment. "Sure, she needed me to reason with her at a time like that. But we were just kids. I don't think it applies now."
"Honoka-chan doesn't change so easily."
"I don't see the definitive proof that she needs me now," Umi pressed, her brow creasing in frustration.
"Just because she's thoughtful now doesn't mean she's reasonable."
"You can't trust me to be reasonable right now, either, Kotori." Umi sighed, leaning forward and resting her chin on her palms. Kotori was asking too much of her; there was no way that she could "be there" for Honoka with all of their unresolved emotional baggage. Perhaps more concerningly, Kotori's words were giving her a different kind of encouragement. "You're giving me the wrong idea."
"Oh?" Kotori said simply, raising an eyebrow.
She sighed, peeking up at Kotori through the gaps in her hands, imploring her friend with her eyes only. "This is just a hypothetical question. Please don't take it too seriously."
"Okay?"
"Based on what you've been saying, do you…" she paused, lingering over her words for another second before throwing them out for consideration. "...do you think that I would still have a chance with Honoka?"
Kotori's amber eyes held her. Umi felt like her words were being scrutinized, picked apart, though she'd made her intentions quite clear. "You blew your best chance, Umi-chan."
"I know."
"In magnificent fashion." Kotori made a tiny arc with her hands. It was a cute and truly inappropriate gesture for the subject matter, but Umi was not about to question her friend's mannerisms at this moment in time.
"Yes, I did…"
"When Honoka-chan first told me, I was shocked that you had the worst possible reaction – "
"Kotori." Umi gritted her teeth. She had to control her temper; lashing out in this situation could only end badly. "I would appreciate it if you refrained from detailing all of my many follies. I've spent far too much time dwelling on them myself."
Kotori put a hand to her forehead, letting out a protracted exhale. "…You're right. I'm sorry. There's no need for me to go into such detail." Slowly, as she spoke, her usual disarming cadence returned to her voice. Umi was relieved to hear it, but at the same time, it was worrisome to see that she had come so close to invoking the wrath of the sweet, gentle Kotori. "You understand the spot that I was put in, Umi-chan, with you two not being on speaking terms for so long."
Umi raised an eyebrow. This was something that, she admitted with no small shame, she'd only given cursory thought to. She merely nodded, allowing Kotori to continue.
"I love you, Umi-chan. You know that. But I love Honoka-chan, too. I love both of you so much. And when something like that happens…" she spread her hands out in front of her, like she was hoping to capture the magnitude of her own dilemma. "I feel like I have to pick sides. That's something I never wanted to do."
"…But you did pick a side, didn't you?"
Kotori frowned. Though she held Umi's gaze, she kept quiet, and when she did respond, her bout of silence had already told Umi all she needed to know. "Yeah. I did."
Kotori brushed her hand against the bench. It came away wet, and she rubbed the droplets between her fingers. Umi watched her do this once, then twice. She knew better than to interfere; an angry Kotori was as rare of a sight as it was terrifying. "Umi-chan, I don't think your chances are zero. But now that chance isn't just a question of her love for you. It's also a question of her trust."
"That's true."
"I'm going to be completely honest with you, Umi-chan."
Umi braced herself, nodding slowly. "Go ahead."
"If she still trusts you after what you did, I'd be very surprised."
"I would be, too."
"When I said that she needs you… I still think that's true. Ideally, it's in a platonic way." She glanced at Umi's wavering gaze, but continued nonetheless. "If you can be that voice of reason for her, without constantly reminding her of her… former love for you, then that's perfect. You both minimize the risk of getting hurt that way."
"I'm really in it deep, aren't I?"
Kotori nodded, then turned away, for Honoka was bounding back towards them. "I'm done being rational for now. If I may be selfish, for just a moment: good luck. Even after all that's happened… some part of me still wants to see you two happy. Or, at least, I want to see you two trying to escape this… this rut you're in."
Umi frowned. They didn't have more than ten seconds before Honoka was within earshot. "Remember: this is all hypothetical."
"Okay." Kotori shrugged, as though she were just coming to terms with the idea. "Then, it's hypothetical good luck."
Umi had to smile. "I give you my hypothetical thanks."
Turning to face Honoka together, Umi only now realized that she'd brought someone with her. Rather, "dragged" would be a more fitting way to describe how Honoka had led her here, as the frequent bounce of her twintails, combined with the exertion splayed across her face, told Umi that she couldn't keep up this pace for much longer.
"I found Nico-chan!" Honoka gave a grand gesture towards the girl in question, as though she were a rare animal.
Nico was hunched over, her hands on her knees. Umi peered at her, wondering if she should offer some water. But it only took her a few moments for her to catch her breath, and when she looked up, her glare was as intense and intimidating as it always had been. "Whose funeral did you both come from?" she asked, seeing Umi's grave expression.
"Mine." Umi couldn't resist making the joke at her own expense, even with Honoka standing right there. In a way, she wasn't lying, she reasoned to herself.
"Shit." Nico pulled a grimace, eyeing Umi with distaste. "I'm sorry I asked."
"Where are the others?" Umi changed the subject. "Have you seen them?"
"I was with Eli and Nozomi." Nico jerked her thumb over her shoulder. "Until someone nearly tackled me and dragged me away. You could say I was kidnapped."
"Oh?" Honoka grinned. Her eyes anywhere but at the girl she was addressing. "Who'd do something like that? Especially to someone who's so – "
It happened so fast, Umi hardly caught Nico's fist falling back, almost innocuous, to her side. Only when she saw Honoka clutching at her forearm, her face now twisted up in pain, did she understand.
"Nico-chan…" Honoka whispered through her gritted teeth. "Not pulling your punches today, I see…"
"Do it." Nico's voice was dangerous and low. "Say the 'S' word. I dare you."
Honoka nodded slowly. "Okay." She took a deep breath. "You're shor– "
"Okay," Umi had to intervene, knowing how lethal Nico's pint-sized punches could be. "that's more than enough. Shall we meet with the others?" She didn't wait for anyone to agree, setting off in the direction Honoka and Nico came from, the latter of the two promptly falling into step at her side.
"So?" Nico hissed, nudging Umi with an elbow. "How'd it go?"
"How'd what…" Umi trailed off as Nico's intended meaning took effect. "Nico, you told me to talk to her six hours ago."
"Yeah, and? That's more than enough time."
Umi affixed her senior with an incredulous stare. It only took moments for Nico to give in; she shoved Umi lightly, her dismissive laugh piercing the cold air. "I'm just messing with you. It's Christmas! Just try to be happy tonight. Try to get her – " she jerked her thumb back towards Honoka " – to be happy too. Can you do that?"
Umi opened her mouth, ready to answer in her usual uncertain manner, but this time, she stopped herself. She didn't fully believe Kotori's words yet, about how Honoka "needed" her, but that wouldn't stop her from trying. "I can."
"There you go!" Nico grinned, clapping Umi on the shoulder. "Where's this Umi been?!"
"What are you two talking about?" Kotori approached them from behind, both girls turning to face her. "I want in on the fun, too."
Nico slung her arm across Umi's shoulder, and though she didn't mind the excessive physical contact, Umi knew that her senior could shift from playful to threatening gestures at a moment's notice. Right now, she wasn't sure which one Nico had in mind. "If by 'fun,' you mean whipping Umi into shape, then I'm having a blast."
"Oh, you too, Nico-chan?" Kotori eyed the unlikely pair, her smile growing. Umi swallowed harshly. "I could use the help! Thanks a lot."
"Uh, you two know I'm right here, don't you?" Umi tried to interject, fearing a dual-grilling by both Kotori and Nico. "And where did Honoka run off to this time?"
"Over here, you three!" Honoka called, as if on cue, from further up the street, where she had slipped past without any of them noticing. Once again, she wasn't alone, and the remaining two seniors she was with waved in tandem.
Umi shot Kotori and Nico a relieved look before hurrying to join the others.
"Umi-chan! It's been so long!" Nozomi smirked at her, waggling her eyebrows as though the joke weren't already obvious.
Umi played along. "Yes, six hours is an unbearable wait," she said, returning the smile.
"We're almost complete," Eli observed, looking from Honoka to Umi. "Now we just need the first-years."
"There's no way they can bail on us now," Nico said as she and Kotori joined them. "This is our first opportunity to be together since we graduated. On Christmas! The storybook setting is off the charts!"
"Yeah, no one would miss the opportunity to see Umi-chan," Kotori giggled.
"Don't act like I have some heightened sense of importance," Umi frowned, scowling at her friend.
"I'm glad I got my opportunity!" Honoka pounced on Umi unexpectedly, causing her to let out an undignified yelp as their combined weight threatened to make her knees buckle. She kept her footing after stumbling somewhat, and she looked up to the sight of a smiling Honoka hanging on her shoulder, as well as the other girls looking on, surprise painted across their faces.
"Honoka!" Umi protested, a blush rising to her face at being the center of attention. "Please, warn me before you try to tackle me to the ground."
Honoka seemed to pay her no mind, humming as she nestled in closer to Umi. "But it's true!"
"You know," Eli observed, smiling all the while, "Honoka might be onto something. Where would we be without our regular dose of Umi?" She stepped closer, her too-wide smile making the hairs on Umi's neck stand on end.
"Eli…" Umi held her senior with an imploring stare. "Shouldn't you be helping me out of this? Not encouraging it?"
"She's right, you know," Nozomi said, her hands already up and seemingly ready to launch into some sort of unwelcome physical contact.
"Y-you too, Nozomi?!" Umi's gaze darted to all of her friends currently present; all of them stepped forward in unison while Honoka still held her in her death grip. She closed her eyes and gulped, bracing herself for the inevitable Umi-sandwich, with its namesake at the center.
"What's all the fuss about?" A familiar voice, outside the immediate vicinity of the circle, saved Umi from her half-pleasant, half-unpleasant fate. All of them turned, all six faces lighting up to various degrees of surprise.
"Maki-chan!" Nico was the first to call her over. "Took you long enough. We're, like, an hour behind schedule by now."
"What schedule?" Maki scowled at her senior. "You said 7:30, and I knew it would take at least a half hour for everyone to get together, so here I am. Besides," she added, glancing back at the two guilty-looking girls who hung a few feet back, their eyes elsewhere, "I couldn't have accounted for someone trying to start a snowball fight on the way here."
"W-who could that be, nya?" Rin stammered, making a pathetic attempt at whistling. "Kayo-chan said it'd be fun, too!"
"It would be…" Hanayo muttered from her friend's side, "if there was more than a centimeter of snow on the ground already. I thought you knew that, Rin-chan…"
Umi observed the pair's red faces and their shivering even through their jackets, and she was able to piece together who, exactly, was involved in this "snowball fight." Maki's irritated expression and traces of ice dripping down her windbreaker was further proof of this.
"Oh, hey, Umi-chan!" Rin rushed forward, disrupting Umi's scatterbrained thoughts. "Wait, if you're here, that means…" She whipped her head around, taking in everyone present, "Everyone's here?!" Her mouth fell open.
"That's right!" Nico struck a dramatic pose, brandishing a camera in the air. "And you all know what that means, right?"
"Early New Year's mochi?" Hanayo piped up.
"A dogpile on Niccochi?" Nozomi suggested.
"A live performance of Snow Halation!" Honoka called right into Umi's ear, making her jump. She still had her arms wrapped around Umi's shoulder.
Nico smacked a palm to her forehead. The sound was almost painful. "You're all wrong! Do I need to explain everything around here?" When she was met with silence, she stamped her foot and huffed. "We have to commemorate this with a picture! 'µ's, Three Years Later,' or something. I like the sound of that."
Nods and sounds of affirmation rose from the group. Umi herself had no problem with the idea; it could add some much-needed decoration to her empty college department or make for a more uplifting phone wallpaper.
Within seconds, Nico had a passerby setup the picture with her camera, and the nine girls crowded into the figurative picture frame, posing in the middle of the street. All around them, the Christmas lights hung on the storefronts all the way down the street, making for a distinctly festive, if not somewhat blurry, composition.
"What should we do for this picture?" Honoka asked to no one in particular.
"Everyone hug Umi-chan!" Kotori chirped immediately.
"Wh-what?!" Umi tried to protest, but she found herself in the exact center of all of her friends. She only had time to wish that she'd been more spatially aware before she was swarmed in a flurry of hugs and giggles, and Nico's camera flashed.
I'm sure it will be a wonderful picture, she thought to herself as she was released, unable to prevent a nostalgic smile from crossing her face.
As the night began to wind down, Maki was the first to pull Umi aside. "I'm done writing the song. How does two days from now sound?"
Umi blinked. "Two days for what?"
"You know, two days until we start recording."
"Two days…" Umi couldn't hide her surprise. Maki shushed her, glancing over at the remainder of the group, scattered at different points on the sidewalk. None of them seemed to hear the outburst, so Umi continued. "You can book a spot that quickly?"
"The band really wants to start playing it. I finished the rest of the instruments after we hung out this morning, and I was aiming to start tomorrow, but I still need to send the parts out to the band after I get home. I'll give them a day to practice, and after that we should be ready to record."
Umi nodded slowly, her eyes wide with amazement. "That's quite a band you've got there. Only one day to practice?"
"They're pretty good. But that applies to you too, you know."
"Oh, right…" Umi flushed, as she had momentarily forgotten her own assignment for the song. "Can't you give me a few extra days to practice the vocals? You need to record all the instruments first, so I can sing over the complete backing track."
"That's fine, but I want you to come to all the recording sessions. I'll be overseeing the instrumentals, but I want your input too."
"Are you sure?"
Maki leaned in, lowering her voice even though they were well out of earshot of anyone else. "You can't forget: this is your song, first and foremost. Don't you want to get acquainted with the band? Get a feel for who's playing what?"
Umi couldn't argue with that. "Okay," she conceded. "I'll be there."
"Great. It's going to turn out fantastic."
The second time Umi was pulled aside, the method used was a little less ceremonious. While they were walking in a group, someone yanked on her arm, effectively pulling her to the very back, where her assailant lagged behind the rest of the group.
Umi rubbed at the back of her neck when the other girl remained silent. "Honoka? Are you alright?" This, she noted, was the first time that they'd been alone since last night. She wondered if Honoka wanted to continue that distant conversation, or if she had something of equal weight that she wanted to say.
"I've been wanting to remind you," Honoka whispered, though they were likely out of earshot with the slow pace at which they both walked. "You still owe me something. Something big."
Umi turned, her eyes wide upon hearing this statement. "May I ask why?"
"Don't you remember the night you left?"
She stopped in her tracks, immediately feeling heat rise to her face. Of course she couldn't prevent herself from physically reacting to mentions of her lingering regrets. Still frozen, she took in Honoka's expectant expression, betraying nothing more beyond that. "…What about it?"
"We were trying not to talk about leaving!" Umi tried to study Honoka's face, framed in the Christmas lights, but she only saw a slight irritation in her furrowed brows and pout to match. Her face was more cute than angry, and Umi found herself trying to hold back a smile.
Remembering that they were discussing a dangerous timeframe, that they were moments away from breaching more sensitive topics that Umi had run from for years, the traces of a smile disappeared from her face. She knew full well what Honoka was referring to, and she responded carefully, without insinuating anything further about that night. "I failed miserably, if I recall correctly."
"You did!" Honoka nodded in agreement. "Are you gonna keep your promise?"
Umi's nod was automatic, and she almost wished she could take it back. Part of her, the more cynical, negative part that had dictated the majority of her actions over these past two years, told her that she had no right to try and 'promise' anything with the girl whose heart she had broken. At the same time, she couldn't let that part define her. There was a more forgiving, selfless part of her that she'd neglected for just as long, and right now, it was telling her to prove herself, to keep proving herself until she was someone that Honoka truly deserved. "I am. What do you request out of me?" For you, I'd do anything. She left the last part unspoken, unsure as she was that Honoka was ready to hear it.
The rest of the girls had almost mixed in with the rest of the Christmas crowd, somewhat blurry shapes in the distance. Umi could still make out the general sound of their chatter if she listened, but right now, she didn't want to make a sound. She was fixated on the girl in front of her, and in that moment, she thought that she would do anything that Honoka asked, self-preservation be damned.
"I want you to keep in touch." Honoka murmured, her voice quiet but confident. "Even when you're away at college."
The request was simple, clear, but the implication was not. Still, Umi responded with an equally firm "Of course."
"No more disappearing?"
"Not anymore." Not after I know that you don't hate me.
"I'd love that. Thank you." Honoka fidgeted for a few moments, then her hand darted out to grasp Umi's. Judging from the redness that she failed to conceal, Umi guessed it was an impulsive action.
"Of course. It's the least I can do," Umi smiled, squeezing Honoka's hand in hers.
"It really is!" Honoka giggled. "Come on, let's catch up. They're probably wondering what we're talking about." She jerked her head in the direction of the other girls. Nico stood at the edge, waving and calling something Umi couldn't hear from this distance.
"Are we going to tell them?" Umi asked.
Honoka hummed to herself. When she turned back to Umi, her smile was as bright as any she'd seen from her, from before she left. "Nope! It's our secret."
Umi remembered Nico's advice to her from earlier that evening. "Try to get her to be happy too. Can you do that?"
Looking at Honoka's smile now, a mixture of mischief and simple joy, as the snow continued to fall gently around them, Umi knew that she had succeeded, if only for this one moment. Prying into her words, the nature of her request to 'keep in touch,' threatened to shatter that fragile happiness, and so Umi chose not to pursue that thread for the time being.
When Honoka stepped forward, her hand still interlocked with Umi's, the usual bounce had returned to her step.
Notes: wow, a tangible ending is finally in sight! with only 2 chapters to go, maybe that'll be a decent reassurance that i have the remainder of this story planned out. and i do! i've had it for a while. it's just life happens and i'm an eternally lazy pos and other fun stuff like that!
if you're still around reading this i literally don't know what i've done to deserve you. see you all in the next chapter, which is... an indeterminate time from now.