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***WARNING*** may be a trigger as this story discusses Rape***Warning***

Melissa Daniels

I look at Ana who's eyes are squeezed shut. I can't imagine how horrific this is for her. She's going through a transvaginal ultrasound so that the baby she's carrying can be checked but at only eight weeks along they couldn't get a clear enough image otherwise.

In my many years as a victim advocate I have never had to do this. I have never had to see a woman suffer in this way having a necessary but intrusive procedure outside of the rape kit. My heart breaks for the woman crying silent tears while she squeezes tight on her hand.

I did thankfully have a chance to have a quick word with Doctor Greene before this procedure. From what she told me I know Ana has been her patient for ten years, she bought the older children into the world and once again she is supporting Ana through her pregnancy and could possibly be responsible for welcoming the next baby into the world. She assured me she would be quick, that she would not waste time, that she would check the heart beat take a still then focus on showing Ana. For Ana's doctor, she was horrified and shed a couple of tears when I explained in as little detail as possible what had happened and why this was necessary.

As soon as Doctor Greene pulls the Doppler away I see Ana's relief and feel her relaxing. I can only imagine how painful the exam must have been, especially knowing how sore the woman is probably down there after such a horrific attack.

"Ok Ana, I can tell you baby number five is doing great." Doctor Greene says as I help Ana to sitting. Ana looks at the woman, assessing whether she is telling the truth or not. "Would you like to see the picture?" She asks gently. Ana simply nods and turns her head as the Doc turns the screen.

Then I see something very unexpected, something I have never seen anyone do so soon after being assaulted in the way Ana was. I see a bright, wide, genuine smile.

"It's ok?" She asks again, her eyes hooked on the image.

"Heartbeat is perfect, the right size and everything." Doctor Greene sounds genuine enough.

"Could you print off a few? Please?" She asks. "Christian would want to see."

It was Ana's decision not to have Christian in the room. I saw further heartbreak on that man's face but it's my job to advocate for the victim in all circumstances, therefore I told him he had to go with what Ana was asking of him. I can't imagine how painful it was for him to hear his wife asking him to wait outside, but it's what she wanted and it was what she had. Sadly, in these situations, where someone has been attacked in such a horrific way, we can't begin to understand what is going through their minds. You just have to go with what they want.

"Of course I can." Doctor Greene smiles.

"And while that's being done can I have a shower?" She asks looking up at me. I nod, I know showering too much won't be healthy for her, given the chance she'd probably try and scrape off her skin to rid herself of the feel of the man who hurt her but as long as I'm watching her closely I can make sure she doesn't go overboard. She will feel dirty for quite some time and there's nothing I can do to stop that, just support her.

Jason Taylor

I pace up and down the hospital corridor outside Ana's room. I have been assigned to stand guard. Probably to stop me trying to get in to see her attacker and murdering him, it wouldn't do any of us any good if I was the one to end up in prison. I know Sawyer feels the same and that's why he's standing here with me, waiting for her to get dressed so that we can take her home.

Take her home. I don't know how much of a challenge it's going to be once we get her home, we've already had her advocate out here and John and the new shrink trying to prepare us for what's to come but I simply told them no one can prepare us for what's going to happen.

I don't know rape or rape trauma syndrome as John's friend Tamara keeps calling it but what I do know from her is that it's like PTSD and I know PTSD. I have seen many men brought to their knees by backfiring cars and firecrackers after being in war and coming home with PTSD. The most important thing to know about PTSD is no two patients are ever the same. In other words we have to take Ana as we find her and expected the most unexpected.

When the door opens I come to a stop. Ana comes out of the room looking like death warmed over. I don't know what to say, what to do. I have never been like this in the entire time I've known her.

"Ana." Luke says quietly and she instantly reaches for him.

Luke, taking his cue's from her, wraps her up in his arms and holds her tight. I hear him muttering to her, I don't hear the words but I can guess, he's telling her she's safe, that she's alright, that he won't let anything happen to her again. I know because it's what I want to tell her. I know because it's what I will tell her as soon as I get the chance.

I see her eyes open and meet mine and I see a small minute sense of a smile. I reach for her, unable to help myself and I'm so grateful when she doesn't flinch and instead moves from Luke's arms into mine. I don't ever remember hugging Ana, not like this. I know I did when the kids were born but they're my only memory, and they were awkward and uncomfortable.

I feel like a father, like I need to protect her so much. I know I'd be just like this if it was my Sophie.

Of course, Ana doesn't yet know how much I know. As the head of security for the Grey's I have been able to access a little more information. I haven't even been able to tell the boss yet and I know he's going to explode when he does find out. This guy wasn't on our radar, this evil bastard who hurt our Ana had never been on our watch list… he fucking should have been.

Having spoken briefly to Ray who knows more than the boss at the moment, I know if Ana had spoken more about her past with the boss this guy would have been hurt and watched a long time ago, because we never knew, we never could have done anything to prevent any of this from happening.

"Take me home." Ana's quiet voice reaches my ear. I squeeze her just a tiny bit having to remind myself that she's here and we'll help her be ok.

"Let's go get that husband and child of yours." I tell her, having had my instructions from Christian already.

"Don't let go of me?" She pleads quietly. I break at her words, I could never have imagined Ana Grey asking anything like this of me before. I manage a nod, too choked up for a verbal response.