Author's note: Still more angst. Sigh. Thanks for trusting me that I will indeed start making this right. I don't know if anyone has been paying attention to the names of the chapters but they are months. I am projecting this fic will finish up in June/July, so anywhere between 4-8 chapters left.

Warnings: Vague references to depression, depression coping techniques (and abuse thereof – food/alcohol/exercise related), OMC/Dave (not explicit). (More detailed warning at the end – please read if you think these could be triggering for you and contact me for a revised version of the chapter).

APRIL

He goes to Adam's a lot to unwind, although he feels bad about him getting the brunt of his complaining about David and Sebastian being idiots. He still hasn't figured it out, feels like he's missing something from both parties. But he obviously can't talk to either Dave or Sebastian about it. Adam at least seems to appreciate the bind he's in and lets him vent for ten minutes, fifteen max, before forcing a subject change.

"I'm sorry to use you as my sounding board… ranting board. Ugh. Whatever it is."

"It's okay, it's what friends are for."

"To a point. You have to be sick of hearing about them. I know I am." Adam shrugs and Kurt can't believe just how good natured the guy seems to be. "Come on, tell me about your day."

"It was good. Productive. I have a date this weekend…"

"Oh, who with? Do I know them? Can I pretend to be the protective friend that threatens broken bones? Actually you know? I suck at that role…" he lets out a long sigh and Adam laughs, walking past and ruffling his hair, something he's gotten used to now. He's glad Adam is going out on a date, not hung up about him.

"You can try out your acting skills with him if you want. His name is Ryan. You want me to see if he can find a friend?"

"Ugh. No thanks. I have enough relationship dramas in my life without adding to it. Oh my god that's sad. SO much drama and none of it actually mine."

"Would you want it to be you?"

"No. Although I kind of feel like it's mine anyway, two of my closest friends. Please, if you get a boyfriend have a nice easy relationship okay?"

Adam laughs.

"I'll try my best."

"So when is the date? Friday? Tell me it's Friday, because I have two tickets to see the new show opening and I really don't want to have to drag Dave along. He's miserable enough without subjecting him to that." Adam knows about the season tickets he has, mainly because he's already moaned about the fact that he has no one to go with now that he and Sebastian are being slightly reserved with one another.

"I can come on Saturday, although are you sure you can't convince Sebastian to go with you?"

"We can barely say hello to each other right now, and that's when we're actually in the same room… I don't know how to help Sebastian. We only really started being friends because of Dave and now that he's out of the equation…"

"Do you want to be friends with him? Separate from Dave. "

Kurt lets out a long breath, thinks about Sebastian's personality, his brash arrogance and smug attitude that he's always in the right. He doesn't like him sometimes, and he knows that that feeling is mutual. There is however a respect there, and he does enjoy his company.

"Ugh. Yes. But only if it was alright with Dave."

"You live with Sebastian, it would be better if you were on friendlier terms with him."

"I've been thinking of moving out."

"Is that actually feasible? Financially I mean."

Kurt sighs and rolls his shoulders, because it's not, not if he wants to eat. He has savings, and he could get a job, but he also knows the reason he's doing so well in classes is because his life is fairly stress free. All he worries about is Dave and Sebastian.

FAF

It's incredibly fucking weird now, living with Kurt. It's almost like it was Kurt that he broke up with rather than Dave. Their conversation is stilted and polite, not the easy relaxed friendship they had before and he misses it almost as much as he misses Dave. They don't hang out, say the bare minimum of words to each other and have actually go days without seeing each other. It's awkward as fuck and he wonders how long it will be before Kurt tells him he's moving out. Or if he'll just come home one day and find him gone.

He knows Kurt isn't home every night, spending anywhere between one to four nights out. He assumes he's staying in Dave's dorm room and he tries not to think about it too much, figures that Dave probably needs the company. He needs the company too but he has no idea how to ask Kurt to hang out, particularly when he suspects Kurt would just laugh in his face. He knows Kurt is still angry with him for hurting Dave and he can't blame him, he'd be just as pissed off with Kurt if he'd hurt Dave.

He wakes one morning, smells coffee and can hear someone rattling around in the kitchen. It's rare that he catches Kurt at home and he wants to see him, maybe start a conversation.

"Morning."

"Morning. Coffee?"

"Yeah. Thanks."

He watches as Kurt pours him a coffee, adds the perfect amount of sugar and slides it across to him. The simple act makes him ache, that even though they might not be talking very much right now Kurt is a close enough friend to know how he takes his coffee. For once the silence feels less awkward than usual and he lets himself relax a little, wondering if he should ask how Dave is.

"I… can I ask you something?"

"Mmm?" Kurt hums, eyes narrowed and he decides that asking after Dave might not be his best idea.

"How did you recognize me, that time outside Dave's class?"

Kurt looks surprised at the question and he lets himself feel a little accomplished at still being a little unpredictable.

"Your scarf. How many students do you think walk around with a Ralph Lauren scarf on?"

"Huh," he hadn't considered that.

"Also you looked incredibly suspicious and then I recognized the scarf…" Kurt pauses, chewing his bottom lip. "Have you tried to see him again?" He shakes his head, because he hasn't. Doesn't want or need to see Kurt and Dave hugging again. Once was bad enough. His imagination doesn't need any more ammunition. Kurt sighs. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I'm fine."

"Hmm…" Kurt doesn't look like he believes him.

FAF

Dave hadn't really made many friends in his dorm before, or in his classes, and he realizes now just how isolated he'd made himself by spending the majority of his time with Sebastian and Kurt. Not that he's spending less time with Kurt, but they've taken to cooking together in the communal kitchen, which leaves a lot to be desired when compared with the kitchen in the apartment but he hasn't heard Kurt complain once. They've made lasagna and eaten it straight from the pan while watching something random on the TV affixed to the wall in the corner. It's nice, as is the fact that everyone on his floor now knows who Kurt is, greeting him by name when he turns up and not even blinking an eye when Kurt is still there the next morning. Sebastian didn't come to his dorm room very often.

He's been filling his spare time with studying and going to the gym. He's never been so far ahead in his classes, always well prepared and he knows the lecturers and teacher aides have noticed, calling on him in class and he's stopped caring what people think of him. Good grades are something he can keep hold of always. It's something he repeats to himself like a mantra every time he feels like shit when he thinks of Sebastian and the loss of what they had

Though he also has moments when he feels strengthened. They're brief and usually followed by a period of feeling like he would do anything to get Seb back but he holds out. He doesn't want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with him.

Spikes of jealousy hit him sometimes, the fact that Kurt still gets to see Sebastian whenever he wants and he gets down about it. Kurt never mentions Sebastian though, and most of the time he's grateful for that and others he just wants to break down and beg Kurt to tell him how Sebastian is, what he ate for breakfast, what grade he got on his big presentation. He doesn't though, and he wonders how the hell he hasn't yet given in to the temptation; then reminds himself that he might not like what Kurt will tell him.

He tries to focus on the positives in his life, tells himself they far outweigh the negatives but in the quiet of the night he can't deny that it doesn't feel like it's the other way around and he lets himself cry. He tries not to give in to the tears when Kurt's staying over, but he'd woken up crying one night and Kurt had sat on his bed, hugged him and petted his hair and he doesn't remember falling asleep after that but knows he must of.

Sometimes Kurt comes to visit grinning, telling him he's just been hanging out with Adam but he wonders if Kurt says that anyway, so he doesn't feel hurt that Kurt has maybe been spending time with Sebastian. He tries not to care. After all, it's not Kurt's fault Sebastian broke up with him so he could ask Kurt out.

FAF

He's noticed Sebastian is working out a lot more, coming up from the gym in the apartment block covered in sweat, stripping his clothes off as he walks toward his room and he knows it's not a conscious decision on Sebastian's part, that he's always seemed happy walking around half-dressed. Today though he can't help but stare. Sebastian's body used to be solid, lean and well-toned, but now there's a lack of mass and he looks like he's been working out and not eating…

"You're not eating..." he says, not really meaning to say it out loud but it stops Sebastian's forward movement and he turns slightly.

"Yes I am."

"Not properly. You've lost weight," Kurt states.

"Thanks."

"It wasn't a compliment." He realizes that Sebastian ate whatever was put in front of him, whether it was himself or Dave doing the cooking, jointly or separately, they always ensured Sebastian got food. Not that he feels responsible for Sebastian but thinking of the number of times he's had to remind Dave to eat… "Let me start cooking dinner."

"You don't need to look after me Kurt."

"Well maybe I want to," Kurt snaps, frustrated beyond belief when he realizes that it's true. He pulls out bowls and ingredients with unnecessary force, taking his anger out on the kitchen utensils. He doesn't have a lot of choice in what he can make, it has to be omelets with nothing else available. He really should start eating at home more. He beats the eggs, chops some peppers and cheese, decides against the shriveled mushrooms and sets about making dinner.

He hears the shower going, and he's grateful at least that Sebastian doesn't seem to be wallowing in a pit of unwashed despair he suspects that there is definitely some despair going on. He wonders if he can get Sebastian to talk about it, or whether he'll get shut down like every other time he's ever broached the subject of feelings. He pauses mid-poke of the omelet, remembering roughly a year ago when Sebastian hadn't needed any prompting to scream his feelings at Kurt. He'd been angry. Thinking Dave was so in love with Kurt that he'd never stand a chance. That of course had been complete and utter rubbish.

He huffs out a breath and rubs his face. Despite all the thinking he's done he still doesn't get why Sebastian has split up with Dave. He knows feelings can change but looking back he can't recall any evidence to suggest that had been the case. The opposite in fact seemed to be true.

"Smells good…" Sebastian says as he enters the kitchen, pulling his shirt over his head and Kurt can see more closely the lack of muscle.

"Hmm. Yeah. It's ready."

FAF

He has mixed feelings about Kurt looking at him. He has always been vain and appreciated admiring glances. Kurt shouldn't have eyes for anyone but Dave though. He knows that it is incredibly hypocritical to think it, but he wants Dave to have the best. His eyes always admire others, and even if Dave had said it didn't bother him he always suspected that it did. Conversely he'd always noted that Kurt only ever had eyes for Blaine when they'd been together. He wants that for Dave.

He just has to keep reminding himself of that.

FAF

"So… I'm going on a third date tonight. Want to come along and make it a double date?"

"Third date in a fortnight. Nice work."

"That doesn't answer my question."

"I'm good thanks, stay home and be a hermit, watch Netflix…"

"Your place or Dave's?" Kurt groans, because he really doesn't want to hang out with either of them right now. He just wants to blob, not talk or listen to anything, just be on his own. "Tough decision?" Adam asks.

"No. I'll go and see Dave. I haven't seen him in three days with school."

"You know you can be a little selfish. If you want to go to my place and just hide you can. I can give you my spare key."

He's tempted. Very tempted but finds his head shaking automatically.

"Thanks, but I really want to see Dave. Feels weird having not seen him in so long."

"Well if you're sure. Offer still stands. As does the double date."

"Thanks. I'll see you later…"

They give each other a quick hug and he lets himself take solace in the warm strength for a brief moment before heading toward the exit. He doesn't bother texting Dave until he's arrived at his campus, sending a quick message just saying he'll see him soon. He takes the steps two at a time, greeting those he passes. He's looking forward to seeing Dave now that he's here and he knocks briefly before opening the door to Dave's dorm room.

Dave is standing in front of the little cupboard which passes as a wardrobe, wearing nothing but his jeans and white wife beater. Huh.

"Hi Kurt…"

"Hi, was wondering if you wanted to hang out tonight…"

"Uh. I have a date."

"Oh."

"Yeah. I… it's… I didn't know how to tell you. It's not a big deal. We're just going to a game. I can cancel if you like?"

"No!" Kurt insists, noting that Dave sounds far too hopeful, that he'd like an excuse not to go and he wonders if Dave is ready to actually start dating. "You should go. Even if you don't want to, it's good to go outside your comfort zone."

"No, I feel bad. You've come all this way to see me –"

"And I've seen you. Maybe we can grab a quick coffee on your way out? Come on, are you trying to pick a shirt?"

"Uh yeah, trying being the operative word. I… I don't know if I want to look good or not. Is that weird?"

"No. Wear what makes you comfortable. You're already going to feel uncomfortable enough going on a date. What's his name? Do I know him?" Kurt asks, gently pushing Dave to the side so he can rifle through his clothes.

"Riley. I don't think you've met him. He's a member of PFLAG here on campus and stopped me yesterday handing out fliers…"

"There you go then, you've already caught his eye just being yourself. And rightfully too, you're a catch."

Dave huffs and shrugs on the shirt Kurt is holding out. He realizes belatedly that it's the shirt he made Dave for Christmas, the one which has a coordinating shirt made for Sebastian. Oops. He bites his lip and doesn't mention it, hoping Dave doesn't mind or remember; although he doubts it.

Dave doesn't say anything as he buttons it up for him and it feels alarmingly intimate and he steps backward when he's finished, not remembering the cupboard is behind him and tripping on a pair of Dave's shoes and generally feeling like an ungraceful idiot. Dave seems too distracted to notice and Kurt lets out a shuddering breath, forcing himself to calm down a little.

FAF

He and Riley walk away talking about the game and he has to admit to himself that he's missed this. Kurt is great, but talking sport with Sebastian is something that he's missed and Kurt cannot replace. Not that he expects Kurt to, but Kurt definitely seems to have filled in enough of the void that Seb has left that it worries him. It's what had been his main reason for accepting the invitation to the date tonight; despite his obvious hesitation Riley had been charming enough to make him want to spend a little more time with him.

He'd convinced himself that is was a good idea, would send a message to Kurt that he wasn't looking at him as a romantic partner, (regardless of whether Kurt even thought that was a possibility). Also a part of him wants it to get back to Sebastian, that he's moving on and can do fine without him. Even if he's pretty sure those are both lies. Fake it until he makes it. He rubs the hem of his shirt between his thumb and index finger, wondering if Kurt chose this shirt on purpose. It was one of his favorites and holds a lot of memories. He hasn't stopped thinking about Seb or Kurt all night.

"I should have listened to you when you said no huh?"

"Uh, what? Sorry?"

"You really don't seem like you want to be here." Dave opens his mouth to object but closes it again and shrugs, making an apologetic grimace. "Well, let's just chalk it up to experience and part ways here shall we?"

"I'm sorry…"

"Hmm. I kind of keep expecting the it's not you, it's me talk and we're only on our first date. But I think I'd totally believe it coming from you right now…" Dave heaves out a long sigh, shrugging again, not really ready to open up to a guy he only met yesterday. "Well, you have my number. Let me know when you sort everything out. Give me a call."

He's surprised by the kiss to his cheek, watches as Riley turns and walks away, is still watching when Riley looks over his shoulder and waves his hand in a little wave. He waves back, wishing he didn't feel so all-over-the-place right now.

FAF

He's only had a glass of wine but his head feels decidedly light and he nurses his second glass in the dark of the living room, not wanting to get up and turn the light on but also liking the dark around him, the lights from the city through the window offering a very muted half-light. He doesn't expect Kurt home tonight, he's been home the last three nights, the longest he's gone without staying at Dave's. When he hears keys in the lock he sits up a little straighter, surprised.

"Hi…" Kurt says, and he sounds tired.

"You're not staying at Dave's tonight?"

"No, he's out on a date."

Sebastian blinks. Sets his wine glass down on the table and then picks it back up, takes a big drink and then sets it back on the coffee table again.

"A date."

"Mmmhmm..."

"Wait. What? Why aren't you with him?"

"Because he's on a date..." Kurt says slowly, like he thinks Sebastian missed the point.

"But he's meant to date you."

"What?"

"That's how it was meant to work out..." Sebastian mutters, head thumping back into the leather with a thwump, eyes sliding closed.

"Are you serious?" Kurt asks, his voice louder and he opens his eyes to find Kurt standing above him. He shrugs. "Oh my god, you're serious. Really Sebastian? Oh my god. You're a bigger idiot than I thought. Firstly, much as it pains me to say this, I consider you my friend. Ugh. I am not going to hook up with Dave and live a happily ever after him when he's so obviously in love with you. It doesn't matter what he feels for me. He loves you."

"He loves you too," Sebastian mutters belligerently.

"Bullshit. Maybe he thinks he does, but he doesn't."

"Open your eyes Kurt. Sure it might have just been a crush for him a year ago, a type of infatuation. But since then? Your friendship and just hanging out with him... Us. He told me he loves you."

"Be that as it may, he also loves the Rangers and I don't see you forcing him to watch the Mets."

"The Mets are a shitty team."

"Oh my god! I don't care, my point is even if he loves me, which I highly doubt, it doesn't change the fact that he loves you and wants to be with you."

"Yeah well, if that's the case why is he on a date with some other guy?"

"Because you're a fucking idiot who won't pull his head out of his own ass."

"Fuck off," Sebastian mutters, standing and stomping down the hall after steadying himself on his feet.

"You know I'm right!" Kurt calls after him and he slams his bedroom door shut.

FAF

He groans when there's a knock on his door. He waits, half expecting Kurt to come barging in and demand a rundown of his date but the door remains shut and he slits one eye open, glaring at the door. He likes his sleep-ins on Saturdays. There is another knock and that confirms it isn't Kurt. A quick glance across to the other bed confirms it's empty and that whoever is knocking probably wants to see him. He swings his legs out and stumbles over to the door, still half asleep and hoping he can get back to sleep.

"Seb –"

"Dave…"

"What are doing here?" He feels stripped bare, not prepared for this at all; being dressed only in his boxer briefs makes him feel doubly exposed. It doesn't help that Sebastian can't seem to stop staring and he crosses his arms, pulling the door closed and resting against the door jamb. Sebastian looks tired, gaunt like he hasn't been getting enough rest and he wants to ask but reminds himself how much Sebastian has hurt him, pulls up the anger he feels and lets it feed him.

"I –" Sebastian starts and Dave isn't used to seeing him look uncomfortable. "Kurt told me you had a date last night."

"Yeah. I did. So?" Sebastian's eyes flash and he's not sure if Sebastian is angry, has no idea what Sebastian would have cause to be angry over. "Look… is Kurt okay?" Dave asks, wondering if that's why Sebastian is here and the idea of something happening to Kurt makes him sick with worry but Seb is already shaking his head, saying that Kurt is fine and at home. That single word home feels like a punch to the gut and he sucks in a deep breath.

"How was it? Your date?"

"What?" Dave asks, eyes narrowing, and he shakes his head slowly, realization washing over him. "I'm sorry Sebastian, but you gave up the right to vet who I date when you broke up with me."

He steps back and shuts the door, slumping against it and lets himself go, tears sliding down his face silently. He doesn't hear anything on the other side but knows Sebastian won't hang around looking at a closed door. He wipes his face and walks over to his bedside table for his phone, sending Kurt a quick message. He needs a friend right now.

FAF

He can't get to Dave fast enough. Sitting on the subway willing it to go faster, second guessing his decision not to get a cab despite knowing that he'd just be stuck in traffic above ground. He runs across the dew-damp grass and up the stairs, throwing sorry's over his shoulder as he goes. He doesn't even bother knocking at Dave's door, just pushes the door open and stops at the scene. Dave sitting on his bed playing Xbox in nothing but his pyjama pants. Pyjama pants he knows Dave hardly wears except for Kurt's own modesty when he stayed over.

"Hey Kurt. Thanks for coming..."

"Anytime..." Kurt manages, settling down beside him, sucking in a deep breath. Dave gives him a one-armed hug and pauses the game before setting down the controller.

"You... did you run here?"

"Of course I ran Dave; you sent me a text saying you needed me."

"Oh. Oh crap. I just... I didn't mean for it to sound like a life or death situation. I need you to stop thinking the worst. I just need... a friend right now. It's just... Seb came by earlier."

"Oh. Fuck," Kurt says, letting out a long breath and blowing his bangs out of his eyes. He hasn't even had a shower, although he'd need another one right now anyway. "Sorry. That's probably my fault. I told him about your date when I got home last night..." Kurt says apologetically, and he wonders if he should add what else Sebastian said last night.

"It's okay. Was just weird seeing him again. And it just seemed like he came over to see if I really had a date... kind of like, he doesn't want me but he doesn't want anyone else to have me either."

"Uh... yeah. Something like that..."

"It's messed up."

"Mmm..." Kurt hums in agreement, because he's starting to realize exactly why Sebastian broke up with Dave. He doesn't think it will make Dave feel any better though. It's definitely messed up, in fact that doesn't even begin to explain it.

"He didn't look so good… is it weird that I'm glad he's got you looking out for him?"

Kurt shakes his head.

"You don't stop caring for people, even when they've treated you like shit." He decides not to mention his own concerns about Sebastian's appearance. "Anyway, I'm only there under sufferance because he loves you."

He realizes it's the wrong thing to say when Dave's face crumples and fresh tears start pouring down his face, his head shaking and the barely decipherable words but he doesn't love me anymore sobbed out. Kurt knows better to argue, knows now after last night that Sebastian does still love Dave even if he has an incredibly warped way of showing it. He moves and wraps his arms around Dave, letting Dave rest his head on his shoulder and rocks them gently, rubbing his hand on Dave's back soothingly.

The tears don't last long and he pulls away slightly to find Dave staring at him intently. He licks his lips, realizes that sitting side-by-side, legs pressed against each other while on Dave's bed is far more intimate than buttoning Dave's shirt up last night. He swallows, breathing shallow as Dave's hand reaches up to cup his jaw. He presses his face into it; place a barely perceptible butterfly kiss to the fleshy muscle of Dave's palm. Dave's thumb brushes over his cheek bone and Kurt feels a full-body shiver.

"Please Kurt?"

He pushes down the swell of guilt rising in his gut, running it through his mind that Dave needs this, that it will make him feel less alone. He doesn't pretend to not understand what Dave is asking, hopes he can deal with his own conscience after just last night saying to Sebastian that he wouldn't. He kisses him softly, gentle, hoping it conveys how much he cares. It isn't a sexually driven kiss, but he can tell that it wouldn't take much for that to change, his body already responding more than he'd like. Pulling back he puts a little more distance between them, leaves their fingers touching and the soft smile Dave gives him has him smiling back despite the sick feeling of guilt.

"You're not dating Sebastian…"

"What?"

"I just… I thought that was maybe why he broke up with me. So he could be with you."

Kurt blinks rapidly, knows his mouth is hanging open, head is moving back and forth slowly. He'd thought Sebastian an idiot, but now he's convinced both of them are. They really have to talk to each other.

"Trust me when I say that Sebastian is not interested in being with me. Although I do need to talk to him."

"Uh, okay…?"

"Oh, not right now. Later. Just… I think you two need to talk."

Dave snorts and he lets the subject drop for now, his mind racing now that he can see both Sebastian's and Dave's totally misguided view of each other's relationship with him.

FAF

The sour acidic smell of vomit greets him as soon as he pushes the door open and he pulls a disgusted face, quells down the urge of his own stomach to hurl and flicks on the light. He can't see Sebastian hovering in the shadows and he really doesn't want to step in vomit. He frowns then, his mind catching up to the reason why there is vomit.

"Sebastian?"

He moves quickly, walking through the apartment, looking and calling out Sebastian's name. When he pushes the door open to Sebastian's bedroom the smell is overpowering, although he still can't locate Sebastian himself. The bathroom light is on though, door ajar and he pushes the door open further with his foot.

"Oh fuck…"

Sebastian is lying on the floor, a floor completely splattered with dark red which he hopes is red wine and not blood. He kneels, instantly relieved when he feels a pulse in Sebastian's neck. He feels overwhelmed for a moment, trying to figure out what he needs to do first. He has no idea how much Sebastian has had to drink, has never seen him like this.

"Sebastian! Wake up…"

He's not surprised he doesn't get a response and he wonders if rinsing him down with the shower fixture is a viable option. It isn't an overly nice option, but right now he needs to wake Sebastian and rinsing him down will have the added benefit of getting rid of the vomit. He turns the water on to warm, removing his shoes and socks and rolling up his pants with a moue of disgust. He continues to talk to Sebastian, hoping the little grunts and groans he hears is Sebastian slowly waking up. He starts rinsing the floor, glad the bathroom has a drain for the shower built directly into the floor.

Sebastian's clothes are covered in vomit and he knows he's going to have to help him get undressed. He shakes his head and then settles the shower head over Sebastian's prone form, unable to get his head around the thought of Sebastian being selfless, and what he's done is, in a weird and twisted way.

"Ugh!"

"Yeah, hi… this wasn't a nice thing for me to come home to. Fuck I was scared," Kurt says, voicing his fear for the first time. Sebastian grunts, moving to sit and lean against the toilet. "You're an idiot. Do you have any idea how much Dave loves you? Any at all?"

The glare Sebastian gives him has zero effect and he wonders when he became immune to them. Of course the fact that he's dripping wet, white shirt stained red with what has to be vomit consisting of red wine and not much else.

"Pretty sure there are better people for him than me," Sebastian slurs and Kurt feels a little vindictive pleasure that he's going to get to have this conversation with Sebastian while he's still drunk.

"Right now I am going to agree with you, because you're acting like the biggest asshole on the planet, but don't you think it's Dave's decision to make whether he wants to be with you or not?"

"Don't you think it's my decision to not be with him?"

Kurt frowns, because he does have a point, and he didn't think Sebastian would have been capable of actual argument in his state.

"If I believed you actually wanted to not be with him we wouldn't be having this conversation. You're miserable. He's miserable."

"And what, you're not still miserable from breaking up with Blaine?"

"I was miserable, and yeah, I still think about it occasionally and feel sad, but I haven't drunk myself into blacking out."

"I didn't black out."

"Oh really? I think me finding you passed out in your bathroom lying in your own vomit paints a different picture." Sebastian grunts in response, fingers starting to work on the buttons on his shirt. He wonders if Sebastian would listen to him about talking to someone, because he suspects that he might need to. "Oh great, and now you're getting naked," Kurt mutters.

"You're the one that turned the shower on me."

"Come on, let me get you a towel. You can clean up the rest tomorrow. And then you're going to talk to Dave. Properly."

"It doesn't matter. Dave's never going to want me back. Or forgive me."

"What did you do that needs forgiving?"

Sebastian shrugs, fingers working at the button on his jeans.

"Oh my god!" Kurt says, throwing a towel in Sebastian's general direction. "You… you know what I think? I think you deliberately drove him away. Why?"

"I don't deserve him."

"Oh for fucks sake, cut the woe is me bullshit. You used to think you deserved an entire fucking harem, my ex included. What's changed?"

"I don't deserve him," Sebastian repeats and Kurt sighs.

"Well right now you definitely don't. I'm going to sit outside while you have a shower, make sure you don't slip over and give yourself concussion. If you don't already have it. Oh my god, you didn't bump your head did you? That would explain a lot."

"Ha ha. You're a riot. Now leave unless you want a full show."

A part of Kurt is tempted to sit and watch just to screw with him but he settles on the floor outside and keeps up a stream of idle chatter, his mind fixated on how he can fix both his friends' lives.

Warnings: Depression coping techniques for Sebastian include his use of exercise to exhaust himself physically and not taking care to eat and maintain a healthy food intake for the increased activity he is doing. Sebastian is also drinking and there are repercussions of that.