iii.

"You're Cloud, right?"

He was leaning his back against the well, hands in his pockets. His shoulders were lax, as sedated as they could be as he stared up at the moon. His eyes flicked over to her carelessly, and he remained quiet, as if the question was too trivial to warrant an answer.

Perhaps it was a silly question. Nibelheim was a small country town. Everyone knew everybody else, even if they weren't acquainted. And they weren't acquainted, but she'd heard stories, made an ice pack for her friend who'd gotten a black eye from the boy in front of her, and she still couldn't fathom how. He wasn't very intimidating, besides the eyes and his sharp face. He hadn't fleshed out his muscles like the other boys. He was skinny and small, but he was a few inches taller than she was, and that in itself made him all the more condescending.

"Or, I mean, I know you're Cloud," she amended, brushing at her shirt. "I've just never talked to you."

"Then why are you talking to me, now?"

She knew he didn't have many friends, if any at all. She never saw him with a group, never saw him hanging out with anyone outside of classes. He was the shadow that hid himself where he couldn't be found, and he was perfectly content that way. If he could be called the town outcast, it would only be because he'd put himself in that position.

Tifa couldn't understand why.

"Because I never see you talk to anyone."

"Maybe that's because I don't want to."

Tifa placed a hand on her hip, squinting up at him.

"I think you're lying."

He blinked at her, shrugging his shoulders and pushing off the wooden planks with his foot. "Whatever you say."

As if it ended the conversation, he started to walk away. Tifa huffed, and called out, "You punched my friend, you know."

He stopped his stride reluctantly, turning to glance at her. "Who?"

"Mikey," she said, glaring at the side of his face. "His eye was shut for a week."

She could see the barest hint of a smile. "Good."

She felt her back bristle. "He didn't do anything to you!"

He shrugged again. "You should rethink your choices in friends."

He reached his porch in a few more strides and shut himself into his house. Tifa stared in confusion and frustration, wishing she could shout a scathing remark to his closed door.

No wonder he didn't have any friends.

From then on, she'd see him at the well more often. He'd walk outside, still alone, but less confined and isolated. She'd always thought he'd lock himself inside his house after school, find things to do in the work shed behind his house in his backyard.

She couldn't help but be curious. Mikey and Vick and Shane all told her stories about him. How he'd avoid everyone on the playground, and how he'd hide behind the school and smoked and ate beetles and had an illicit affair with one of their teachers. They said all kinds of fanciful things, ridiculous things, and they'd laugh and joke and she was ashamed of it later, when she laughed, too.

She'd glance out her bedroom window sometimes, watch him almost sneak out of the front door of his house, and go out for afternoon walks.

That's when she decided to follow him. It was a bad idea. She felt it curl up inside her stomach like a spiked chain, keeping her on a leash to her desk, but it was too interesting for her to pass up.

She ended up stumbling a good distance behind him, making sure there was a close outcrop of shelter nearby at all times. He never looked back, not when she cracked a leaf under her shoe or hit a small rock across the ground.

When he crossed the bridge to the mountain, she couldn't do it. She watched him walk across the narrow, rickety boards, loosely connected, acting with the intent to snap and break and kill the person who dared walk their way over.

He kept his hands in his pockets. His body didn't flinch once.

And maybe he was so laid-back and calm because he didn't care about a thing. She wished she could be that way, that relaxed and tranquil, at peace with the world. Unafraid and undaunted.

Tifa waited for a long while, just to see if he'd come back. If he'd make a round across the mountain and return. She never heard a monster growl, like all the legends said. She didn't feel an earthquake or a rumble. But fifteen minutes turned to forty-five and Tifa finally relented.

She got up, brushed herself off, and went home. For the next week, when she'd see him leave his house, she'd get up and follow behind. He always went to the same place.

"Stop following me."

He startled her at lunch. He was holding his tray and glaring down at her. He didn't seem to notice her friends, jumping and turning to give him a glare of their own.

"I wasn't following you," she spluttered.

"Yes, you were," he said angrily. He leaned in. "Stop."

She almost shuddered, but he turned left as abruptly as he came.

"What was that all about?" Vick asked, watching Cloud's retreating form.

"No clue," she lied, trying with immense difficulty to finish her sandwich.

She eyed him taking a seat at a faraway table, shoulders still tensed up in knots.

It was then she decided, beyond reasonable doubt, beyond all the screaming nags inside her that told her to stay away from him. She'd be his friend. She'd keep following, much more careful than before. She'd miss all the eggshells he'd leave in his wake.

Everyone needed a friend, after all, even if they didn't want one.

She knocked on his door. She knew he was still there, because she hadn't seen him leave. It still, however, took several knocks to get him to answer the door.

He peered out, glancing down at her. She gave him a smile and held out her basket.

"I made cupcakes."

He stared at her oddly, looking toward the cloth concealing the treats from his view.

"Cupcakes?"

"Like a peace offering," she said, seeing the expression on his face. "You know, for following you." She blushed.

He opened the door a little wider, leaning his elbow against it. His eyes were on her face, examining and wary, before he reached out and took the basket from her.

"Uh, thanks."

She blushed again, then shook her head quickly. "It's the least I could do."

"You didn't have to do anything."

She looked up to him skeptically. "Yes I did."

He scratched the back of his head, then said, "Why did you follow me, anyway?"

She felt incredibly reticent, under his stare and his questions. So up close and personal was different in the severe daylight. "I don't know. I was curious."

"About what?" he said.

"Where you were going."

"Why?"

She puffed a little sigh, hugging at her sides. "Does it really matter?"

His glance turned contemplative. "Guess not," he answered, shrugging against the frame.

Tifa felt a bit more at ease, not having to answer the question straight out to him, so soon. What would she say?

Let's be friends. I want you to take me across the bridge and explore and have fun and teach me how to be all calm and cool, like you.

She bit her lip and stared at him staring at the basket. That wouldn't do at all. He'd slam the door on her face. He would say something indifferent or mean.

A voice from inside the house broke their silence. It sounded like a woman—his mom. He shifted, his head looking behind him, then toward Tifa.

"Gotta go," he said in a farewell.

Tifa nodded, stepping back and giving him a small wave. "Bye, Cloud."

A few days passed before Tifa built up the nerve to sit by Cloud at lunch. She expected him to back away, look at her and stand to take his leave.

"Hi," she said.

Instead of standing immediately, Cloud looked shocked. His jaw clenched in mid-chew.

"Can I sit here?"

He glanced over to the table she usually took, seeing her friends with faces as confused as he seemed to be. Tifa knew Shane and the guys wouldn't take this lightly. They'd ask her questions later, if not now, but she figured it would be easier to be confronted by them instead of trying to explain. They wouldn't understand, anyway.

"Sit with your friends, Tifa."

She'd never heard him say her name before. Her hair stood on end, and she swallowed and said, "You're my friend, too."

He scoffed a laugh. It was without humor. "No, I'm not."

"You could be."

"No, I couldn't."

The bluntness of his answer surprised her out of one of her own.

He stood up and reached for his tray, throwing the remains in the trash, and walked out of the lunch room.

As expected, she was cornered after school was over.

Shane started first, being the unofficial, self-proclaimed leader of the small group. "What was up with today?"

Tifa crossed her arms, giving him a defensive glare. "Nothing. I can sit where I want, can't I?"

"Yeah, Teef, but you could have at least let us know…"

"And let you talk me out of it? I didn't want that."

Shane's face fell. "Tifa…"

"We just don't want you to get hurt," Mikey spoke up, giving her a small quirk of a smile. "I mean, that guy can be a bastard."

"None of us have great impressions from him," Vick mumbled. "He's got a bone to pick with us, from all the hell he puts us through."

"Ever watched what happens in dodgeball?" Mikey said, giving her a serious stare. "It's always war in there."

"We just get concerned," Shane said, lightly poking her in the shoulder. "You're pretty tough, but you're not that tough."

Tifa half-smiled at them. It reminded her why she liked them so much, though it twisted her stomach with guilt. They were easy to talk to. They were all her best friends. It'd been like that for the longest time, and yet it was hard for her. Hard for her to tell them those small, silly, festering things best friends tell each other. The things that weighed on her heart. Because, despite everything, she liked Cloud Strife. She liked his hair and his eyes and his quiet demeanor. She liked that he was a loner. She liked that he was unapologetically himself.

She gave them a small shrug after a while, looking toward the ground.

"It's just…everyone deserves a friend every once in a while, don't they?"

Vick smiled, gave half a shrug. Mikey stuck his tongue out. Shane sighed.

"Not if they don't want any," Shane said, shaking his head. "Think about it. If you wanted another friend, what would you do, Teef? Go up and talk to them, right?"

Tifa frowned. "But not everybody does that. Sometimes, people can have a hard time talking to others, can't they?"

"Having a hard time and purposely avoiding are two different things, Tifa," Mikey answered, rolling his eyes. "If he wanted to be friends with any of us at school, he wouldn't lash out with insults every other day. Or he wouldn't avoid us."

"You can be pretty mean, too, Mikey," Tifa said, giving him a look. "He punched you because you called him a… a uh…" Tifa flushed. "A really bad thing, and it was uncalled for."

"Yeah, well he was—he was looking at you, like, staring at you, and it was revolting. I didn't—none of us—liked it." Mikey grimaced, crossing his arms and balling his hands. "I was the only one to do anything about it."

Tifa blinked. "You…none of you guys ever told me this."

All of the boys shifted uncomfortably, evading each other's eyes.

"It wasn't important at the time," Vick answered slowly.

"Overprotective, is all," Shane said, scratching his head.

Tifa glanced at all of them, one by one. She didn't know what to say or do. There wasn't a ledge she could grasp. "Um…look," she started, uncertain. "I know you guys want to protect me, but sometimes, I think, it's best if you let me do things that I want to do. Even if you think it's dangerous. Whatever it is. Okay?"

"But Teef—" Vick started, face contorted in confliction.

"But nothing," she said, the feeling of decisiveness washing over her. She grinned. "I take Tae-Kwon-Do lessons, you know." She swooped in between them, weaving her way to the dirt path. They followed after her.

"Besides," she said, the hint of her teasing underlying her words. "All of you are starting to sound like my dad."

Mikey was indignant. Vick started choking. Shane grappled her neck in a headlock and rubbed vigorously at her scalp with his knuckles.

"You are definitely going to take that back," Shane promised, keeping up his torture. Tifa couldn't stop laughing.

"Never," she breathed out, slipping out of his grasp and darting down the street.

"Hey, come back!" Shane shouted, chasing after her. Vick and Mikey followed close behind.

They were never able to catch her.

After that day, she made a routine. Every other day, she'd sit by Cloud, whether or not he'd decide to leave or stay. The other days, she'd sit by her old friends. The tension between the parties seemed to settle once this was established, though she'd be caught in between occasional glares.

Cloud would usually leave after a few minutes passed. She'd greet him with a smile or two, a glance from him, and then he'd stand up and leave her.

But some days, he'd be unpredictable. He'd ask her a question—how her day was, how her family was, how she did on a test. He never smiled at her, never let his eye contact linger for more than was polite. He wouldn't joke, but he'd include bites of dry sarcasm in his short conversation. She remembered that the most about him. She remembered not understanding him at times—or taking him seriously, when he wasn't being serious at all.

And she knew that she remembered this the most because her absolute confusion in how to take his words made him smile at her. It was short and close-lipped, mimicking his words, but it was this easy type of eager smile, as if he'd been holding it back.

It was such a nice change of pace, that one day in many, and Tifa had been so sure he'd stay sitting.

But he stood up after that, and he left.

Cloud still visited the mountain, across the breaking bridge. Tifa would 'accidentally' bump into him on his way when she'd get out of her karate lessons.

"Where you headed?" she asked.

"Mt. Nibel."

"Oh," she said. "Isn't that kind of dangerous?"

He gave a shrug. "Not really. There's not much up there."

Her eyes widened. "What's up there?"

He glanced at her for a second, then looked up to the bridge. "Why don't you see for yourself?"

Her feet begged to take a step back, but she held her ground.

"I don't think…I don't think I can."

"You can. You just don't want to."

"But I do want to!" she shouted, precautious and rebellious emotions mixing up inside her. "I just…I don't know. The bridge will fall any day now…"

"It holds up fine."

She opened her mouth, but she hesitated. "I…um…"

"Suit yourself," he answered, taking his leave. She watched in jarring silence as he easily made his way across, amongst the squeaks of the string and shrills of the wind. When he got to the landing, he turned to her.

"I told you."

She took a step in front of her, gathering her courage in front of the bridge. She gave it a closer glance, to either assure her fears or dismiss them, she didn't know. She swallowed as she looked down, seeing the ragged rocks point up to her like knives.

"You gonna come?"

She glanced up at him. If only he knew how much she wanted to meet him, to just let herself slip beside him and see what it was like.

She sighed. "Maybe…some other time."

She hoped he was as disappointed in her as she was herself, to give her some kind of catalyst to wash away the fear faster. But his face gave nothing away, and she couldn't read it closely when he was so far.

"I guess I'll see you later, then."

He turned on the path, and he was gone.

"Shane?" Tifa asked one day, when they were sitting against the well. It was just them, today.

"Hm?"

"Have you ever wondered…what Mt. Nibel was like?"

He glanced over to her with raised eyebrows. "Sometimes, yeah." He looked at her more closely. "Why?"

"I was just thinking…" She bit her lip. "If…well, I think we should go. We've never been, all this time."

"It's always been off limits…" he said, before a grin came upon his face. "Right now?"

She went to swallow, but her mouth was dry. "Yes."

He stood up, dusting off his shorts, and grabbed her hand, pulling her up with him. He didn't let go of it as they raced across town.

And then there they were, looking at the bridge. Tifa hated it but wished she could love it. It would make it easier if she did.

Shane huffed out a breath. "Are you ready for this?"

No. "Yeah," she breathed out. "Let's not think about it."

He nodded. "Agreed."

They stared at it for a second longer before Tifa let go of his hand and ran as fast as she could go. She heard Shane's boots right behind her. It was a comforting sound, and she concentrated on it instead of the creaks of the wood, and the ridiculous swaying pushing up at her feet.

And then she was there. On the surface of the rock of Mt. Nibel.

She breathed heavily, then laughed, and laughed and laughed some more.

She turned around and threw her arms around Shane, wrapping them tighter and tighter until they were vices.

"Thanks, Shane."

He gave a long hesitation before his arms cradled her, much looser than hers. "We just crossed a bridge, Teef."

"I know, but I was always too scared to get across. This is huge!"

She looked over his shoulder and saw the pathway that Cloud always took, barely worn down from his footsteps alone.

She wondered what it would be like, to be hugging him instead. To cross the bridge with him on the other side.

"I did it," she told him, as soon as she could. "I crossed the bridge, and it was great."

Cloud looked surprised. "When?"

"Over the weekend with Shane. It was amazing! We walked up the path you made and we almost made it to the top, except it was getting late and dark and we didn't think we'd be able to make it back to see if we went all the way. But I'm going to start going more, look around. It'll be so fun. I've always wanted to," she said, gushing. "I've always wondered what it was that you saw out there."

She followed his gaze to the table with her guys. "It was so mysterious. Something so new," she trailed off, starting to feel as if it didn't matter. He wasn't interested, and it always seemed to her that it was a difficult task to keep his attention. She thought the longer he stayed sitting, the more at ease he was with her. Perhaps that was only a fanciful notion.

She followed his gaze. She couldn't figure out why they were all glaring, why Cloud's face was a storm, and Shane's and Mikey's and Vick's were all mixed together in a heated death match, all trying to one up each other for the fiercest look.

"Stay on the path, okay?" Cloud said as he stood up. "Nothing off of it. You'll get lost or hurt or both."

"But…" she tried, as she started watching him turn. She had the urge to keep him there, like she always did, but it was magnified more than it had been. "But you found your way. What makes you think I can't find mine?"

He stopped and glanced over to her. "It's not a big mountain, but it can get confusing. Trust me."

She watched him walk out the door before she rushed after him.

"Wait, Cloud!"

She saw his back go rigid. "Tifa—"

"Listen," she began, reaching out to touch his shoulder. He flinched, and she immediately took away her hand. "Listen," she said more softly. "I was thinking maybe…Maybe you could show me around out there." She shrugged. "Just…once. I promise I won't bug you about it."

She held her breath as his face changed. She didn't know what it changed from or what the new expression meant, but she prayed he'd give an affirmative.

"…I don't think—" he started, and her face screwed up with determination.

"No," she said firmly, putting her hands on her hips. "I went with Shane. We're taking Mikey and Vick tomorrow. But…" she said, hesitating, then stopping. She took a breath. "I always wondered if…if…" She shook her head. "You know the way around better than all of us. Just. Please. Just one time."

He seemed to struggle with his words, more so than in a long while. "One time."

She felt a weight lift off her. She gave him the largest grin she could muster, trying to fend off the conflicted look in his eyes.

"Thank you so much, Cloud."

She rose up to kiss him on the cheek, then she scurried away, hoping that he wouldn't think it was a mistake.

The blush remained on her face the rest of the day.

They decided to meet on a Saturday afternoon. She told her father she was hanging out with Sara, who lived across town from her, just in case. She wanted to tell Mikey and Shane and Vick, but they had a hard enough time with her at lunch with Cloud. She didn't think they'd take it lightly if she told them she was going to Mt. Nibel with Cloud alone. It wasn't as if she didn't trust them, but she knew one of them might crack and leak it to her father, and if that came to pass, she probably wouldn't ever see much of Cloud again. Besides, she told herself. It was a onetime thing. Why ruin it by worrying others?

He was already at the bridge when she arrived, sitting on a boulder surrounding the ledge. When he looked up, his face gave way to brief surprise.

Tifa crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow. "Did you think I wasn't gonna show?"

He slid off the boulder, giving her a look before answering honestly. "No."

She frowned a little at his lack of faith in her. "Well, I'm here now."

He nodded, placing his hands in his pockets. "Let's go."

He started a lazy walk across the bridge, and Tifa forced her pace to match his, wanting for all the world to go faster. She sighed, and said, "How do you do it?"

"Do what?"

"You're so calm. I mean, I want to run right now, but you act like you don't care how long it takes to get over." She paused. "I think you're like that in everything you do. Like school and when I see you walking. You always have this slow stride, like you're relaxed and peaceful. And sometimes when we play sports, in PE, you're always so patient…I swear you always hit the home runs in baseball."

He took his time to answer, and in the short lapse of conversation, Tifa realized all of what she said. She watched him a lot, took unintentional notes in her head. She bit the tip of her tongue, wanting to take it all back, but she wanted to know more than she wanted to keep it all a secret.

In the end, he tilted his head a bit to the side. "Guess I've never had a place where I've really wanted to go."

Tifa squinted at his back. "So you've never had this urge to just…run? Just to run and leave?"

"I have, but where would I end up?" The question sounded rhetorical, as if he'd thought about it many times before. It sounded like a jest. "If I ever went anywhere, it'd have to be for a purpose. Not only because I wanted to. If I did, I'd just come back, then I'd be right where I started."

She messed with her fingers, thinking. "Have you thought about where you're going to go after school?"

"Maybe I'll join the army," he said quickly, as if anticipating her question. "Or maybe I'll go…somewhere far away."

"Like…Wutai?" she smiled.

"I don't know."

"Costa Del Sol?"

He shrugged, and she laughed. "Vick wants to go there, be a beach bum. He wants all the women, I think."

"Probably."

She remained smiling, facing him, and realized she was on solid ground again. She breathed out, her smile growing wider. No matter how many times she crossed the bridge, the same relief washed over her on each trip.

And though this time felt like the first, she didn't rush over to him and give him a hug. She never held his hand on the way, and, besides, he was already walking up the path, hands still secured in his jean pockets.

They didn't veer off the pathway much, Tifa now accustomed to watching the shrubs and bushes melt into a lighter brown sediment, soft and bouncy, growing into small rocks, into larger and larger ones until they became boulders and cliffs. It was easily traversable, with juts and ledges lingering beside them.

When they did trudge off the path, Cloud turning right when they should have kept left, Tifa spoke up.

"It's something I found recently," he said in answer.

There were more challenging ledges on the right side, sharp corners of rocks rounding each curve. Tifa scraped her leg on one of them, but it wasn't any worse than the cuts and bruises she'd gotten on her visits before.

They made it to a small landing, where the rocks turned into small, mutated steps. They led to a slanted ledge, and Cloud reached to it and pulled himself up to the landing. Tifa followed Cloud's lead, sidling up beside him.

"Over there," he said, tilting his head.

She peeked her head over the edge, glancing down.

The green was searing, bright and luminescent even through the fading daylight. It was a tiny lake – a puddle, not more than a few feet deep from the angle. A ribbon stream was leading into it from two different pathways, the cracks in the ground deep enough to let the life crawl out.

"Is that the Lifestream?" she asked, the awe littering her voice.

"Yeah," he said. "It comes from the middle of the mountain, underneath the outcrop over there. See?"

He pointed to the left, toward a dark cavern leading inside a break between the rocks. She could see green spilling out from the circle, appearing from the cavern, and dark blue mako crystals sitting by the entrance.

"You think we could find the way inside the mountain?"

He shrugged. "I've never tried. I went inside before, but it's too dark to see anything."

"Still…" she said, glancing toward the puddle again. "I wonder what happened to make the Lifestream rise out of the ground like that…"

"I dunno," he said. "But it's dangerous. You know that, right?"

"Well, I know that it can cause comas. And it drains you. Takes away your soul if you take in too much."

"Yeah."

"Do you think that's true? Instead of giving life, it…takes it away?"

"I've never seen a person with Lifestream inside them," he answered. "But it's been tested. Remember what Mrs. Jacobs taught us?"

She thought back to the lesson, the pictures, people who abused it, and the pictures of the SOLDIERs. The people who went through genetic mutations to become elite, a part of the authorities of Shinra.

"Of course, but… I wonder if there's more to it than that."

"It can make people strong," he said, eyes flicking back down to the puddle. "The right people."

"That's…I don't know. It's a scary thing to think about."

They stayed up there for a while, taking in the sight once more, before he sat up and looked at the sky.

"I think we should head back."

She mimicked him, sitting up as well. "I guess we should."

He remained sitting for a few seconds, before he said, "Tifa?"

"Yeah?"

He hesitated, scratching the back of his neck. "Thanks. For coming up here."

She beamed at him. "You don't have to thank me for that."

"I just…" he trailed, evading her eyes. He shook his head, and he went to stand. Tifa reached out before he could, grabbing his wrist.

"You just what?"

"Nothing."

"No, really," she said. "What?"

He looked at her hand on his wrist. Then he looked up to her. His eyes held a type of determination in them, molding into small bullets.

"No one ever… I mean, making friends is hard for me, and…you're...I think I..." he trails, struggling, and shook his head. "Never mind. It's nothing. Let's go."

Tifa didn't want to. She didn't know why she held onto his wrist so tightly. Why she looked so intently into his eyes to see past the molding. His face was very close, to where she saw the light red flush growing on his face. He was such a mysterious boy, she thought. Mysterious and mean and guarded and lonely, but so thoughtful and calm. Cold and sad and sitting beside her. Looking at her uncertainly. His eyes widened, gaze trailing down to look at her lips.

"Not yet," she whispered. Then she leaned over and kissed him, reaching around with her other hand, grazing the small tufts of hair on the back of his neck.

And then came the scream, all the way from town.