"I think you should call in sick today," Jax murmured in Jess's ear as his lips moved to her neck. His hands skimmed down her body before he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her tightly against him. Jess moaned at the feel of his touch, tilting her head back to give him easier access and he grazed his lips across her throat. She could feel her heartbeat pick up and her need for him grew.

"I'm the boss, Jax," she said, "There's no one to call." His response was a growl. His nipped his teeth on her earlobe before moving to her lips. She kissed him back, wrapping her arms around his neck. His arms moved down to her ass and lifted her up in one fluid motion. She wrapped her legs tightly around his waist, kissing him harder, and he moved forward until her back was against the wall, pinned against him. She felt his need growing, evident by the bulge in his jeans, and she knew she never wanted to leave.

"I guess I can be an hour late," she said softly, her lips never leaving his. He pulled away from her a fraction, grinning cockily, his eyes darkening with lust.

"Oh, I'm gonna need more than an hour," he said, "I got plans for you." Her eyes widened and she dug her hands into his hair, her eyes practically pleading with his.

"God, I love you," he said, and her heart soared before she gasped as his lips overtook hers once more.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Two hours later, Jess was exhausted and spent, but completely satisfied, reveling in the afterglow of sex as she got ready for work. Jax lay in bed, propped up against the headboard and smoking a cigarette as he watched her change, and she grinned at him.

"You're going to have to stop looking at me like that or I'm never going to make it to work," she said, grinning at him. His eyes raked over her half naked body, clad only in her underwear, and he shook his head.

"That's a terrible threat," he said and she laughed, turning back to her closet. Jax stubbed his cigarette out on the ashtray next to him and climbed out of bed. It was Jess's turn to watch him. She let her eyes roam over his perfectly sculpted body and he smirked, watching her eyes.

"I gotta go into TM anyway," he said, kissing her softly before making his way into the bathroom. She heard the water start to run and was tempted to join him, but she was already so late for work. She finally grabbed a shirt and jeans from her closet and threw them on before running out of the house.

As she drove to Cara Cara her phone rang and as she looked at who was calling, her heart sunk in her chest. The one thing that could ruin her completely amazing day. Tara.

She held the ringing phone in her palm, chewing nervously on her lip as she debated answering. Jax had asked, or rather told, her not to talk to Tara anymore, and Jess knew the best thing to do would be to ignore the call. Let it go to voicemail. Let Jax deal with it. She hit ignore, moving the phone away from her and tried to ignore it. When the phone beeped at her, letting her know a voicemail was waiting, she deleted it without listening to it. Guilt settled over her. Nothing about this felt right, but her loyalties were with Jax.

The rest of the drive to Cara Cara she couldn't stop thinking about Tara. Try as she might, she felt nothing but guilt where Tara was concerned. Here Jess was, living in Tara's old house, sleeping with Tara's first love, spending time with Tara's son, when all Tara wanted to do was see Abel. Jess couldn't help but feel angry at Jax for not dealing with this situation, but bringing it up again was out of the question. Jax had left her no choice but to ignore Tara and hope he would eventually deal with her.

But Tara wasn't going away. She called again when Jess was pulled up to Cara Cara and then again several hours later while Jess was busy dealing with a problem with the dancers. And when Jess still hadn't responded, the texts came.

'You're ignoring me.'

'Please call me back.'

'I just want to see my son! Why is that so difficult?'

'Please, Jess. All I want is to see Abel. That's all.'

'I swear to God, Jess, if you don't answer me I'm going to have no choice but to get the State involved.'

'I've spoken to an attorney. He thinks I might have a case.'

The last two were too much for Jess. She finally, reluctantly, picked her phone up and called Tara, who sounded relieved but angry when she picked up the phone.

"What the hell, Jess?" she snapped.

"Sorry, Tara," Jess sighed, leaning back in her chair in her office, "I've been busy."

"You know, I'm really past the point of caring about your schedule," Tara said, annoyance in her voice, "You made a promise to me. Are you going to keep it, or am I going to court?" Jess sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. In that moment she was so angry with Jax for putting her in this position. He should have dealt with this months ago. Tara was right about this; Abel was her son. Blood or not, she was the person he called 'mommy.' Jax needed to get over his anger at Tara and realize that Abel needed his mom.

"I talked to Jax. He's… he hasn't come around," Jess finally said hesitantly, not sure what else to say.

"I don't care what he feels anymore," Tara responded, "If I don't see Abel… if Jax doesn't work something out with me, I'm filing for custody of him."

"You can't do that," Jess said quickly, panic swelling within her. She thought about calling Jax, but she was afraid that he would take matters into his own hands. The image of Ima's bruised and beaten face swam before her. The thought of Jax resorting to those desperate measures terrified her, but she knew the man she was in love with. He would stop at nothing to protect the people he loved, and if Tara started threatening to take Abel away, that was exactly what he would do. Or worse.

"I can," Tara said confidently, "I raised him until he was 3 years old, and Jax and I could be considered married by common law. That gives me rights. And there's not a court in this State that would say that Abel has a more stable home with Jax than with me. But I don't want to do that, Jess. I don't want to take Abel away from Jax. I just want to see him."

Jess paused for several moments, running through every option she had, dismissing the one, glaringly obvious possibility until she was sure there was no other way. She had no doubts that Jax would do something extreme to keep Abel, and Jess had to protect him from that. Jax was always protecting her… wouldn't this be her way of protecting him?

"Okay," Jess finally responded, after all the rationalizing had been completed in her head, "I'll bring him to you. We can… we can meet at the zoo in Lodi. Friday afternoon." Tara waited several moments to speak, but when she did, the anger was gone. There was nothing but appreciation in her voice.

"I'll be there," Tara said, and then the call was disconnected. Jess set her phone down, trying not to cry, wondering if she was about to make the biggest mistake of her life. But she'd been backed into a corner and she couldn't see anyway around it. Jax was scheduled to work at TM all afternoon Friday, and right after the club had church. Jax would probably be happy that Jess wanted to spend time with Abel and take him to the zoo. But as much as she tried to justify it to herself, the knot in her stomach refused to unclench.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Gemma glanced out the window of the office at TM, surprised to see Jax ride up on his motorcycle. Neeta usually had Fridays off and Jax brought Abel up to the garage so Gemma could watch him. She stood from her seat and walked outside, smiling at her son.

"Where's Abel today?" she asked, shielding her eyes from the sun with her hand.

"With Jess," Jax replied, "She's taking him to the zoo in Lodi today." Gemma raised her eyebrows in surprise.

"Really?" she asked. Jax nodded, smiling.

"Yeah," he replied, "They don't spend much time together so I think it'll be good for them. And Abel loves the lions." 'You don't spend much time with him either,' Gemma thought, but kept it to herself.

"Well, you're off tomorrow. Why doesn't she wait and you could all go together," Gemma suggested. Jax shrugged.

"I actually suggested that, but she said she wanted to spend some time alone with Abel," he replied. Gemma nodded, her eyebrows furrowing. The Jess Gemma knew would want nothing more than for Jax to go with them. Jess had never been anything but trustworthy, but something about this made Gemma feel suspicious. Jess was taking an entire day off, something she had never even done for Jax, all so she could spend the day alone at the zoo with Abel.

"Hmmm," was all she said. Jax frowned.

"What?" he asked, his voice dropping several octaves and his expression was annoyed, "I know that look." Gemma shrugged, shaking her head.

"What look?" she asked innocently, kissing Jax on the cheek, "You need to get to work. We're slammed today." Jax rolled his eyes, but walked away from her towards the garage. Gemma knew better than to express her suspicions before they were confirmed. That would just piss Jax off and he had a blind eye where Jess was concerned, after all she'd been through.

She walked into the office and picked up her phone, quickly dialing Jess's number. She picked up after several rings, and her voice sounded normal.

"Hey, Jess," Gemma said, "Heard you were taking Abel to the zoo today."

"Yeah," Jess replied, "Figured it'd be good to spend some time with him, and one of the elephants just had a baby, so I thought we'd go check it out."

"That sounds wonderful," Gemma said, trying to sound as sincere as possible, "You know, it's pretty slow over here, maybe I could join you guys." Jess paused, and Gemma's beacon of suspicion twitched.

"That sounds great," Jess finally replied, not nearly as good a liar as Gemma was, "But I was kinda hoping to have some alone time with Abel. He doesn't really know me that well and… I'd like to change that."

"Of course," Gemma replied, grabbing her car keys from the desk and rushing to her Escalade, "Are you leaving now?"

"Just about," Jess said, her voice sounding more flustered than it had before, and Gemma knew Jess was up to something, she just had no idea what it could be. Gemma did not like that feeling.

"Okay, well you guys have fun!" Gemma said, ending the call and slamming her key into the ignition, starting it up and peeling out of the lot. She sped, going much faster than the Charming speed limit allowed, towards Jax's house.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess set her phone down uneasily before looking at Abel, who was struggling with his shoes. She smiled at the toddler, kneeling down in front of him to tie his shoes.

"Are you excited about going to the zoo?" she asked. Abel nodding, smiling.

"Your mommy will be there," Jess said hesitantly, and Abel's smile got even bigger.

"Mommy!?" he exclaimed excitedly. Jess nodded, feeling slightly better about the lie at seeing Abel's enthusiasm.

"Yup," she said, "But the only way we get to see mommy is if it's a secret. You can't tell anybody. Can you do that?" Jess grimaced at the words, unsure how she would live with herself, asking Abel to lie to his father. But she knew what Tara would do if Jess didn't take him, and what the repercussions would be for Jax. She had to stop it. Abel nodded seriously.

"I'm good at secrets," he said proudly. Jess nodded. That was as good as she was going to get. She wasn't sure how much trust she could put in a 4 year old, but it was a risk she had to take.

"Good," Jess said, "Because we can't tell anybody. Not daddy, not grandma -no one. Otherwise you might not get to see mommy again." Abel's eyes welled with tears but he nodded.

"I want to see mommy," he said, his voice coming out a whimper, and Jess's heart melted. She knew right then that she was doing the right thing by keeping this promise, even if she was just as sure that Jax would never see it that way. Her only hope was not getting caught. She knew what she'd probably be losing if she was.

Jess finished getting Abel ready and loaded him into her car before climbing in the driver's seat. Her hands were shaking so nervously it took several tries before she got her seat belt secured, but she finally put the car in reverse and backed out of the driveway before heading towards Lodi.

It was a 30 minute drive to the zoo. She'd turned on a Kidzbop CD and could hear Abel singing along in the backseat, but her mind was preoccupied. She thought several times about turning the car around, but each time she did, she thought about Tara and what would happen if she backed out. She thought about the nasty, drawn out legal battle for custody of Abel that would ensue. She thought about how much Jax loved Abel, and what he would do to someone that tried to take him away. She thought about Jax's proclivities for working outside the law and what that would mean for both him and Tara.

She finally pulled into the parking lot of the zoo feeling slightly calmer. Abel would be fine. He would get to see him mom. Tara would get to see him, and Jess would make it clear that any further meetings with Abel would have to go through Jax - Jess was out.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Gemma waited in her car at the end of the block, smoking a cigarette with her eyes trained on Jax's driveway. She was going to figure out where that girl was going with her grandson. She watched as Jess loaded Abel into the car and pulled out of the driveway. Gemma threw her cigarette out of the window and put the car in drive, following Jess onto the highway towards Lodi. She made sure to keep several car lengths behind, but she was certain Jess hadn't spotted her yet.

As she followed Jess making the turn towards the Micke Grove zoo, she began to think that maybe her instincts were wrong. There was a first time for everything, after all. Maybe Jess really was just taking Abel to the zoo. She made an early turn before Jess could spot her, taking the long way around to the parking lot before finding a good spot, relatively well hidden but with a good view of the front of the zoo. She watched as Jess and Abel walked up, hand in hand, and stopped at the ticket booth. Gemma smiled, watching Abel bouncing in excitement. He really did love the lions.

Just as Gemma was about to leave and let them have their day together, she froze, almost refusing to believe what she was seeing. Tara. Fucking. Knowles. Abel's second kidnapper, who had taken Abel without a second thought and put Jax through weeks of misery and sleepless nights while he searched for her. Gemma felt her blood boil as Abel shrieked in glee, racing into Tara's embrace. Tears streamed down Tara's cheeks, but Gemma felt no love for the woman. She'd lost that when she'd made that horrible mistake.

She turned her gaze to Jess, the same fury that she felt towards Tara also directed at Jess. Clearly, Jax had no idea that Jess was bringing Abel to meet Tara. She hadn't thought Jess was capable of such a betrayal, and it nearly broke her heart. She'd thought Jess could be the one to really make it with Jax. She was part of the life, and she had embraced that like no other girl Jax had been involved with, and Jax loved her.

She pulled her phone out of her purse, quickly dialing Jax's number as she lit another cigarette, pacing. She hated making calls like these. This was one of those times where she really hated being right.

"Hey, ma," Jax said when he picked up the phone, "Where'd you go?" Gemma inhaled on her cigarette, taking the time to exhale before she responded.

"The zoo," she said. She heard Jax's sigh of frustration and could practically feel the eye roll through the phone.

"You need to stop doing shit like this," he hissed at her.

"You better hold your judgement until you hear what I have to say," Gemma replied, "because Tara's here." There was silence on the other side of the phone for several moments as Jax took in what she had just said.

"Stay there," he finally hissed into the phone, "I'm on my way."

SOASOASOASOASOA

Jax rushed to his bike, anger slowly working its way into every part of his body. He had made it very clear to Jess what his thoughts were on Tara seeing Abel anytime soon, and she had deliberately gone behind his back. He had trusted her with his son, a trust not given easily, and she had betrayed him. The pain of that realization was almost unbearable.

He sped down the highway towards Lodi, taking the exit more sharply than was either necessary or safe, and didn't slow down until he'd pulled into the parking lot. He parked his bike in a loading zone near the front and looked around for Gemma, finally spotting her by the entrance smoking a cigarette and holding two tickets.

He didn't say anything to her as he walked up, grabbing the ticket and walking past her to the entrance. He was vaguely aware of her following him, but all he could think about was getting to Abel. He wasn't sure what he was going to say to Jess when he saw her. Anger consumed him and he wasn't sure right then if he ever wanted to see her again.

He walked the path along the zoo, his eyes roaming the crowd for signs of Jess, Tara, or Abel, and finally spotted them walking into the gorilla exhibit. He followed them, walking into the small, enclosed room that held the floor to ceiling windows to view the gorillas. He was thankful the exhibit was empty apart from them. He watched as Jess hung back while Tara picked Abel up to look more closely at the gorillas.

"Jess," he stated, his voice full of anger. She jumped, looking over at him, startled, her eyes growing wide at the sight of him. He saw the fear in them and knew how terrifying he looked when he was mad. She had never seen him like this, not with his anger directed at her. Tara turned abruptly at the sound of his voice, looking surprised to see him but there was no fear in her expression.

"Daddy!" Abel shrieked, clambering out of Tara's grasp to run to him. He picked him up, holding him tight into his chest before turning around and walking back outside to where Gemma was waiting. Tara followed closely behind him as Gemma took Abel from Jax, holding him tightly.

"This isn't fair, Jax," Tara said, "I have a right to see him." Jax felt his lip pull back in a sneer as he looked at her.

"You kidnapped him," he said, his voice quiet and controlled, aware of the crowds around him and not wanting to bring anymore attention to the situation that he needed to, "I had no idea where he was for weeks. You think I'd risk letting that happen again?" Tara crossed her arms, widening her stance as though ready for a fight.

"Why do you think I did that?" she asked, "Could it possibly be because I knew you'd do this? I knew you'd try to keep him from me."

"This is not the place," Jax said, glancing at Abel who had started crying and was attempting to hold his arms out to Tara, "You need to leave. Now." Tara sighed, realizing she had no choice, and walked over to Abel. She attempted a smile, kissing him lightly on the cheek.

"I'll see you soon," she said comfortingly. She glared at Jax before walking off towards the exit of the zoo, Abel screaming after her.

"Take him back to TM," Jax told Gemma, unable to bear Abel's screams. Gemma nodded before heading in the same direction as Tara. Jax watched them walk away before turning back to the door he'd just walked out of. Abel's cries had turned Jax's anger into a rage, and he threw the door to the Gorilla exhibit back open to find Jess sitting on one of the benches, her head in her hands. Looking at her, a part of his anger was replaced by sadness, as if he had just lost a piece of himself. He couldn't believe she of all people had done this to him.

She jumped up when she heard him walk in, her expression guilty and her eyes wet with tears.

"Jax-" Jess began, her voice shaky, but he cut her off.

"There is nothing you can say that could possibly make this okay," he said, bitterness and anger in his voice, "I trusted you with my son. I trusted you more than I've ever trusted any other woman. And you went behind my back." He took a step towards her, his jaw set and his eyes burning into hers. He could barely stand to look at her just then.

"How could you do this to me?" he asked, his eyes narrowing as his anger resurfaced, "You betrayed me." At those words, Jess jerked her head up to look at him, her eyes filling with pain.

"That's not fair," Jess said, her voice angry but a sob escaping, "She raised him! Since he was a baby! She had a right to see him!"

"And I told you this was NOT your concern!" Jax said, balling his fists as he tried to contain his anger but failing miserable, "You should've left it alone, let ME deal with it. He's MY son!"

"Yeah, and he's been asking about her! Tara's not the only one getting hurt in this mess and if you'd spend 5 minutes with YOUR son, you'd realize that!" Jess's voice had risen in volume, filling with resentment and anger. It was the truth of her words that pissed him off the most. Words he didn't want to hear, and especially didn't want to hear from her.

"Jax, I'm sorry," Jess said, looking at the ceiling, a single tear dropping from her eye, "I didn't mean-"

"Don't," Jax interrupted, shaking his head. He didn't want her apologies and he didn't want her tears. Right then, he wanted her gone. He felt his fists clench angrily, but he kept them by his side, "I'm going back to TM. That'll give you some time to go back to the house, get the shit you need, and get the fuck out of my house and away from my kid." Jess's lip wavered, but she didn't argue with him and he turned away, walking out of the door and leaving her standing there, tears pouring down her face.

AN: Thank you all so much for reading! If you have a second, please review and let us know what you think! :)