Chapter Summary: Nell is learning to walk. Shaun also thinks about the times he and Lea would talk to her in the womb and when he felt her kick.
AN: Tell me what you guys think of this, especially all of the references to previous episodes throughout the entire story.
Nell was growing bigger every single day as she reached a lot of her infant milestones. At four months, she started teething and reaching for things. By six months, she was sitting up. She learned to crawl at nine months, and before Shaun knew it, she was getting into everything, climbing on everything, destroying things, dropping her food onto the floor, and putting anything she would find in her mouth. She would also make a choking noise every time a food she didn't like would be put in her mouth; it was her way of expressing disgust, which sometimes made others around them nervous.
Everyone agreed that Nell was a cutie and they adored her, especially Kellan, who would babysit her sometimes when he didn't have class. But nobody loved and adored her more than her father. Shaun could tell that she was definitely going to be a Daddy's Girl.
Now, she was 10-months-old and was starting to learn to walk. He and Claire were with her at the local park helping her learn.
Watching Nell reach another milestone in her early life reminded Shaun of the milestones Lea would reach during her pregnancy, especially the moments when he would talk to Nell while she was in the womb.
Lea started to show a little bit by her 18th week of pregnancy, but it could still pass as the aftermath of a big lunch and it was usually only noticeable when she wasn't wearing anything; it could easily be hidden by loose clothing. She'd hit the five month mark, but she hadn't felt the baby kick yet. She could feel some little movements, though. It felt like there were a bunch of butterflies flapping around in there.
"The baby should be able to hear our voices at this point," Shaun piped up while lying and relaxing in bed with Lea. His hand caressed her pregnant belly.
"Are you saying you want to talk to them?" Lea bid, hoping that this is what her boyfriend was requesting.
"Yes, I want to talk to them," Shaun implied, smiling. "We should start talking to them. They're going to recognize our voices when they're out of the womb."
"They need to get used to our voices because we're going to be the first people they'll hear and see when they're born," verified Lea, rubbing her belly with one hand and skimming her fingers through Shaun's hair with the other.
"Well, let's get started," Shaun demanded, shifting and then rolling over onto Lea's legs so his face would be facing towards her abdomen.
"Hey, sweetie," Lea cooed softly, planting her hand atop the base of her belly. "This is Mommy, and I love you."
"Hello there, peanut," Shaun chimed in, gently rubbing Lea's abdomen. "This is Daddy, and I love you, too."
"Peanut?" Lea was astonished, already liking the little nickname Shaun had picked out for their child.
"They kind of looked like a peanut on the first ultrasound," Shaun explained. "And…I like peanuts."
"Okay, then. I actually like that little pet name," Lea giggled before resuming their one-sided conversation with the baby. "We haven't felt you kick yet, but we're waiting," she coddled. "It should happen very soon, though. I've felt you move a little bit, but your daddy hasn't yet."
"You're the size of a sweet potato right now, and we love you, and we're going to be good parents to you. My life is better with both you and your mommy in it," Shaun chuckled as he stroked Lea's swollen belly. "It's also complete."
"I love you even though you're putting me through some pain right now and squeezing my bladder," Lea quipped before she gave her unborn child a comical scolding. "And don't even get me started on having to push that football-sized head of yours out of my vagina."
"And you need to know that I love you just as much as I love your mommy, even though she once stripped down to her undergarments in the winter, jumped into a lake, and pretended to drown," Shaun joked.
"It was not a good joke," sighed Lea, laughing but also cringing at that memory. Shaun was mad about that.
"But I forgive her," Shaun smiled.
"Your daddy and I need to go to bed now, so we're done talking to you. Goodnight, peanut. I love you," Lea finished before turning off the lamp and settling into bed.
"I love you, Lea. Goodnight," bid Shaun, kissing Lea. He then leaned over to peck Lea's abdomen. "Goodnight to you, too, peanut. I love you."
They then went down for the night and fell asleep.
Shaun was later awoken in the night after another nightmare about his childhood. He had them a lot when he was a teenager, especially after Steve died. He eventually learned to manage them.
Unfortunately, they were now making a comeback…probably because he's now got a child of his own on the way; his actual child he had actually impregnated somebody with. Years of child abuse can really do a lot to someone, especially as adults…and when they become parents themselves.
He hasn't told anybody that these recurring dreams have resurfaced since Lea learned she was pregnant (except Lea, though).
Besides feeling his scalpel and breathing in and out, he tried to take his mind off of those thoughts by talking to his unborn child. He wanted to make a bond between just the two of them, a bond between father and child. Shaun sat up in bed and then placed his hand onto Lea's belly, gently caressing it.
"Hey there, peanut. It's your daddy," he whispered. "That's not really your name. We don't know what you are yet and we don't have a girl name picked out just yet. If you're a boy, your name will be Stevie, after your uncle. I think you might remember me from the time you spent in my testicles," Shaun stopped talking for a second and then thought about what he had just said.
That's too weird, he thought, ruffling his hair the same way Steve would do it while also cringing at the words that just came out of his mouth.
"The voices that are talking to you right now will be the voices you'll hear when you come out in about four months. I can't sleep now, so I want you to know how much I love you and care for you…even though we haven't met you yet, and we've only seen pictures of you inside your mommy's uterus. I don't really have anything else to say, so I guess this is goodnight," he said, kissing the swell of Lea's belly and then lying back down in bed.
"That was sweet, Shaunie," Shaun heard Lea mutter.
"You…heard the whole thing?"
"Yes, I did," Lea yawned. "Now, I'm going to go back to bed."
Shaun immediately snuggled up against Lea, wrapping his arm around her waist.
"You can do this, peanut," Shaun encouraged as he knelt and shuffled his knees across the grass, trying to help Nell walk. She'd been walking with a walker for a while, but he was trying to help her walk on her own. For the past week, Shaun had been devoted to trying to help his daughter learn to walk.
Nell was looking and acting pretty timid. With her tiny hands, she clutched her father's hands tighter as she began to take a few baby steps. Claire was standing behind Nell to catch her in case she fell backward.
"You're doing such a great job, Nell" Claire praised the little girl as Shaun continued to move forward. "Go on, keep walking towards your daddy!"
"I'm going to let go now," Shaun warned softly. He slowly began pulling his hands away, and then Nell stumbled backward.
Luckily, Claire caught her and she landed on her bottom instead of her head or neck. She then hoisted her up into her arms. "Okay, I'm going to hand you back to your daddy right now."
"Good thing you were there, thank you for coming to the park with me today," Shaun thanked as he took Nell from Claire. It took two people to help a baby learn to walk. "I probably shouldn't have let go of her hands too soon."
"I think that's part of the process of learning to walk for babies," Claire suggested. "And it could have been worse, she could have tumbled down a flight of stairs."
"Her soft spot hasn't fully closed up yet, so that would be bad," said Shaun, chuckling nervously.
Shaun couldn't believe his daughter was beginning to walk. It felt like it was only yesterday that she was born and when he was feeling her kick and stir inside of Lea.
And speaking of Lea, it was a shame that she was missing this.
At 20 weeks pregnant, Lea reached the halfway point in her pregnancy - and she definitely looked pregnant right now. Very often, she would have this flustered look on her face. Stretch marks were encasing her abdomen, breasts, thighs, and buttocks. Since her old clothes were fitting tighter around her waist with the addition of her swollen feet and ankles, she had borrowed some of Shaun's clothes, but those weren't going to do much for too long…and she didn't want to stretch them out.
"What do you think our baby's sex is?" Shaun asked Lea as they relaxed in their bed. They were offered to learn the sex of their baby at this week's ultrasound, but they declined and decided to be surprised. Even though Shaun wasn't a fan of surprises, this was one of the rare exceptions.
"I don't know," Lea shrugged playfully, rubbing the swell of her belly. "According to those silly old wives tails, I'm having a girl."
"Those are superstitions, not scientific tests," reminded Shaun. He was aware that Lea was obviously not serious because she used the word "silly", and she didn't believe in superstition.
"I know," Lea scoffed. "But according to all of those superstitions, I meet all of the criteria for being pregnant with a girl."
"What criteria?"
"Severe morning sickness, a lot of weight in my midsection, carrying high, rapid heartbeat, excessive acne, horrible mood swings. mostly sleeping on my right side, and my hair is also pretty thin and dull," articulated Lea. "On the contrary, craving salty things and being clumsy are apparent signs that I'm having a boy. Also, because you and I both had brothers and men seemed to dominate my family, I'm actually betting that it's a boy. What do you think?"
"Wait, we're betting?" Shaun questioned, his eyes wide with shock.
"Not really…I'm just guessing. But I'm curious, what do you think the sex is?"
"I don't know. Based on the old wives' tales, I'm betting that it's a girl," Shaun answered, settling his hand onto Lea's belly.
"But you just said that superstitions aren't accurate," Lea snorted before lightly ruffling his hair. "You hypocrite!"
"It could just be a coincidence," Shaun suggested while beaming a smile, which made Lea suspicious.
"Oh, my god! You didn't!" Lea groaned dramatically, looking shocked. "Please don't tell me you peeked at our baby's crotch during the ultrasound!"
"I didn't," Shaun defended, being honest. "I barely saw anything around that area. And remember, the baby was in a tricky position, so it was hard for Dr. Garcia to figure out the sex."
"Okay, good," Lea sighed with relief. "For a second, I thought…"
At that very moment, Lea was interrupted mid-sentence when she felt her baby move around. As soon as she felt that movement, she alerted Shaun. "Shaunie, the baby is moving around and kicking! Feel it!"
Immediately, Shaun framed his hands around Lea's abdomen, waiting to feel movement from inside. "Come on, peanut," Shaun pressed softly. "Kick, please."
"Come on, sweetie. Kick for Daddy! He's been waiting."
"A kick. A punch. A nudge. Please. Anything," begged Shaun. He'd been anticipating to feel the baby move around, but so far, he hasn't been able to feel it yet like Lea had a couple of weeks ago.
"Come on, sweetie. Just…" Lea suddenly stopped and looked up at Shaun, who was still staring at her belly. While she was talking, there was a slight jolt within her abdomen.
Before any of them could talk again, Lea felt another kick inside her belly, probably strong enough for Shaun to feel. She sat up. "Oh, my god."
"Yes! I felt it! I felt it! I felt the baby move!" Shaun burst into a grin, happily flapping his hands. He softly laughed and then kissed the area on Lea's belly, right where he felt the baby kick. "I love you," he swooned, feeling tears of laughter sting his eyes. He gently rested his head onto Lea's swollen belly.
He felt Lea wrap her arms around him. Feeling their unborn child move around made Shaun more happy to not only be a father, but also happier to be doing this with Lea. It was amazing to believe that they had gotten this far in their relationship.
Most of all, he could hardly believe that he had even gotten this far in life itself.
Shaun moved his head up towards Lea and kissed her, keeping one of his hands on her belly and letting Lea cup his cheeks.
"Even though I can't really tell now, I think our baby already loves you," he expressed happily.
"They will love you, too," Lea put forth with a smile. "We already love them too much."
Shaun placed a kiss on Lea's forehead, "I love you," and then kissed her belly, "And I love you. And if you think I don't love you, I really do. I love you more than anything. Even your mom and Dr. Glassman. I even love you more than I loved my bunny and your Uncle Steve. And I love you a hell of a lot more than your paternal grandparents have ever loved me. Well, your grandmother may have loved me, but your grandfather didn't. He was a disaster. He told me he wished I hadn't been born and that I wasn't worth the trouble…but I think you are and will always be worth the trouble."
"Okay, this is getting a bit too real," said Lea. Shaun may have let go of some of his personal fears about parenthood, especially regarding the relationship he had with his father, but some of them still lingered. With the relationship she had with her mother, she knew exactly how he felt. "Don't worry, sweetie. Daddy just shows his love in a different way," Lea replied to Shaun's comment as her way of reassuring him that he won't screw their kid up.
"Or she might show her love the same different way Daddy does," Shaun added and repeated, which he meant that their child could be autistic.
"Or that," Lea suddenly realized that Shaun just referred to their child as "she" and not "they" or "the baby". She then gave him a smirk as if he was guilty of something. "Wait, you did peek at the ultrasound, didn't you? You said 'she'."
"No, I didn't peek at the ultrasound. I just said a random pronoun," Shaun retorted, being honest.
"If you say so," Lea rolled her eyes before drawing her attention back towards the baby in her belly. "Okay, sweetie," she cooed to their unborn baby as she rubbed the swell of her belly. "Can you please give it a rest for a while? Mommy needs her sleep for you to live."
Nell was sitting on one of her father's thighs; he was bopping and shaking his leg up and down a little and holding his arm around her core as he talked to Claire about how excited she was about her upcoming romantic dinner with Dash. Their conversation was interrupted when Nell spat out her pacifier onto into the grass.
"I'll pick it up," Claire offered when she noticed Shaun about to bend over. She picked up the pacifier and handed it back to Shaun, who was pretty disgusted by the sight of it having been dropped on the ground.
"Gross," he revolted, deciding that this thing wasn't going back in her mouth after it had been covered in dirt and grass that were probably contaminated with dog feces at one point. "Can you hand me the pacifier wipes and the pacifier holder?"
Claire reached for the diaper bag and then pulled out the items that Shaun had requested.
Nell stuffed her hand in her mouth, signaling that she was hungry. "I guess I should probably get out the apple puffs, too," smiled Claire, reaching her hand into the bag and then handing the container of snacks to Shaun.
After having a few puffs for himself, he gave some to Nell.
"Did you just eat some of those?" Claire asked curiously.
"Yes, they're really good. I sometimes have them with my oatmeal," shared Shaun. "Do you want to try some?"
"Sure," Claire decided, assuming that it was probably going to taste like cardboard or something, but much to her surprise, the apple flavor was delicious. "You're right, Shaun. These are great. I think I might start having them for a snack for the rest of my life."
They continued to talk for a while as they had lunch before they resumed back to helping Nell learn to walk. Again, Shaun was saddened that Lea wasn't alive to join them for this. He couldn't stop thinking about the day Nell was born; it was the best moment of his and Lea's lives.
AN: The next chapter will be a flashback to Nell's birth.