Everything was well, after all. As long as they had Humperdoo, the decidedly lame Antichrist, the world wasn't ending. It felt like the world was standing still, waiting for them to make a move and push it back in its orbit for it to continue spinning.

Cassidy has been trying to make a move for months. Ever since the first time he looked into those intense eyes, he knew that he found love, pure and elemental. The kind of love that's worth the sacrifice you make, because it gets you to a high harder than the strongest drug, he was one to know. Even loving someone who could never be yours gives you such a high, that you'd never want to leave and find a lesser feeling just for the sake of it being requited.

But this evening, everything would change, once and for all. Jesse Custer was dead, no matter how much it hurt to admit, because that was the truth. Unchangeable. What was changeable was a woman as pretty as the reddest flower, burning to be loved and left alone.

Cassidy would never admit to himself the slight relief he felt after losing Jesse. He'd never. He lost his best friend after all. He'd betrayed him, lied to him, chopped him into pieces, but he was still his best friend and he wouldn't deserve any better anyway.

Yes, Cassidy's been trying to make a move for such a long time. Problem was, he was scared, he was anxious to disturb, to disappoint, to attack someone that meant so incredibly much to him that he would have given his life for her to live. But finally, the opportunity was given.

Tulip felt the love, the respect, the fear. She wanted to belong, to feel loved, after all, though she wasn't a person of commitment, generally speaking that was. Point is, they kissed. Their lips finally met again after such a long time, him pulling her in and her fighting back to keep herself from falling, reluctantly, because she wanted it, she longed for it and she gave in.

This was no quickie, no one night stand, no car sex - for once, they would make love and Cass knew he would die happy with the dizzying thought of knowing her body and giving her all the love he'd been keeping to himself.

He wasn't used to getting who he deemed worthy, no. The "being a vampire" pick- up line only worked in sloppy teen movies. Living forever wasn't in the least bit desirable. It was more of a curse, stopping him from having something deep and true without taking it from his lover. After all, he was just a freak, an outcast, an abomination. What did he expect?

But at this moment, he felt different, looking up at Tulip. Kneeling on the bed with the few rays of sun filtering through the window and lighting the outline of her frizzy hair on fire, like the glory of a vengeful angel, the most vengeful in all of existence.

And he was beautiful too, she thought. Although Cass most definitely wasn't his type - bony, charming, damaged - but the affection he gave and the loneliness she saw in his eyes… Yes, he was indeed beautiful.

Their lips touched again, tender first, then more and more passionate, their tongues dancing around each other for control, her hands clinging into his flash and his teeth sucking at her perfect mouth.

It was all like a dream, the way he undressed her, her amused smile, before taking off his shirt and admiring the chest that recalled so many memories. The way he lowered himself into her and gave so much for her pleasure and the way she let him feel her entirely before reaching the warmest zenith.

"You're so pretty right now, luv" breathed Cassidy, lying on the bed next to her, sweat dripping from her forehead to that lovely neck of hers "Wish you could see yourself."

The way I do, he continued to himself. Wish you could see how much you deserve and how very much you mean to me. How very much I…

"I love you" he said out loud, half to himself.

Tulip wanted to answer for a second, the words already on the tip of her tongue, but words would only ruin this, this miserable happiness. She leaned over and hushed him with a kiss.