Tell Me How To Fix You

Chapter 56

By: The Duchess of Arendelle

AN: Really long chapter to make up for the months of stagnant. Straight up angst up ahead boiiiiii. Sorry for any and all mistakes, enjoy. See you in the end AN!

"Elsa?" Anna called out, knocking on the bathroom door. "Elsa, I'm heading out now, okay?" she asked loudly over the sound of the shower going. She heard a muffled noise of what she took as acknowledgement. Something seemed a bit off though. Ever since their 5th episode of AHS last night, Elsa had begun acting a little off. Like, she was upset about something but was trying to hide it.

Anna opened her mouth to ask the blonde if she was okay when her phone beeped. She had set a reminder about her meeting with Jane. She had to check in at Southern Isle and finish a few more errands before she could meet with the doctor, and if she didn't leave now she would be incredibly late.

"Okay, I'm leaving now. I'll be back by 6 and if you need me at any point today you call me. And I mean it. Love you." She shouted through the closed door and began to gather her things.

Inside the bathroom Elsa scrubbed harder at her skin as she listened to the front door slam behind the redhead.

***************************************FROZEN*******************************************

"I'm here! I'm here! What time is it?" Anna stumbled into the waiting room of the cozy psychiatrist office, heaving as she tried to catch her breath. A plump lady with kind eyes and a gentle smile looked at her as she stopped typing on her desktop.

"Calm down sweetheart. Take a moment to catch your breath." she said softly, smiling with slight amusement. Anna closed her eyes and took in a few deep breathes.

"I'm so sorry I'm late. I was at work and this thing happened and I thought it wouldn't take long, but it took longer than expected and then I found something out, and I had to look into it and-"

Anna stopped when the woman behind the reception desk held up a hand.

"It's alright dear. Just slow down. How about you start by telling me your name?" she asked the still panting redhead.

"Oh, yeah, duh Anna. Um, my name is Anna, Anna Summers. I have a 2:30 appointment with Dr. Porter and it is now…" Anna trailed off as she looked at the clock hanging on the wall behind the women's desk.

"2:54…" she trailed off again.

"Kala, is that Ms. Summers?" Anna heard an extremely posh british accent ask from the intercom sitting beside the woman's, she was assuming Kala, computer. Kala reached over and hit a button, leaning down slightly to respond.

"Yes Jane, I believe it is." she said, voice full of amusement.

"I've just finished up with a client, please send her in." Jane stated and Kala looked up at Anna, smiling and tilting her head towards the door leading into the inner office.

"You can go on back sweetie." she told her. Anna nodded and smiled, thanking the woman and making her way to the door.

Quickly opening the door to go through, she didn't notice the large figure that was trying to come out. Anna collided with the solid figure. With an uff, she stumble back a bit. Steadying herself, she looked back up to apologize, only for the apology to get stuck on her lips. The man was huge, and did not look happy. He practically snarled at her and even through her fear she could swear she'd seen him somewhere.

"Watch where you're going." he barked out.

"I-"

"Adam. What did we just discuss?" she heard Jane ask from behind the hulking man. Anna didn't get the chance to squeak out an apology as Jane came around and stood in between the two. Adam closed his eyes for a moment and took in a few deep breaths. When he opened them again, he almost looked like a completely different person. And that's when Anna remembered.

"Adam? Adam Bastille? I almost didn't recognize you." she breathed out. Adam looked at her for a long second and then smiled.

"Anna Summers. You're Belle's friend. You use to work with us at Mirror. I'm sorry, I apologize for becoming so cross with you." he spoke apologetically. Anna waved it off with a smile.

"Oh please, it was my faught. I was rushing, because I was late, and whatever." she explained.

"Well, it was good to see you again Anna."

"You too Adam, please tell Belle I said hello and that I finished that book she recommended."

Adam's smile widened.

"I'll be sure to do that. Au revoir." he said, walking past the two women and out the door.

"Well Ms. Summer's, you sure make quite the first impression." Jane said with a small laugh. Anna smiled back apologetically.

"Yeah… sorry… I've actually been told that before." she said, slightly looking away.

"It's fine really. Shall we?" Jane asked, gesturing towards her office. Anna nodded quickly and walked through the door, Jane coming in behind her and shutting the office door.

"Please have a seat anywhere you'd like." the brunette psychiatrist told the redhead when she noticed Anna standing awkwardly in the middle of her office. Anna looked around and decided to take up one of the two chairs sitting in front of a large mahogany desk. Jane took up the large brown leather chair behind the desk and crossed her hands together on top.

A few minutes of awkward silence went by as Anna nervously studied the room and Jane carefully studied Anna studying the room. Finally, Anna tentatively cleared her throat.

"Heh… this doesn't seem like a psychiatrist office." Anna said, finally looking back over at Jane.

"What do you mean? Do you not like it? Are you uncomfortable in anyway?" Jane asked, still carefully examining Anna. Anna swallowed hard and let out a slightly strained laugh.

"Oh no, not at all! I'm fine, I really like your office. It's very comforting and inviting. It's just… well… you know on t.v. shows and movies, you have the long leather couch and the psychiatrist sitting in their leather office chairs and they nod their heads and go, 'Hmm, I see, and how does that make you feel?' I just… I don't get that vibe here. It's a much more… relaxed feel I guess. You don't even have the couch." Anna rambled, clasping her hands together and wringing them nervously in her lap. She had no idea why she was so nervous, she wasn't here for herself, she was here for Elsa. Jane, for her part, just continued to stare at Anna, the twinkling of an amused smile dancing on her lips.

"Hmm, I see… and how does that make you feel?" Jane asked, allowing her smile to grow at Anna's shocked look.

"Oh, I'm not- wait… you're messing with me aren't you?" the redhead asked. Jane finally let out a small laugh and nodded her head.

"Indeed I am. I take it you're not fond of therapy or at least psychiatrist offices'?" Jane asked, scribbling something down on her pad.

"I-I-I have no problem with therapy. I mean, I've never been so I - why would I? And besides, I'm here to talk about Elsa, not me." Anna said somewhat defensively. Jane nodded her head slightly and raised both hands in surrender.

"I understand completely and I apologize, I wasn't trying to upset you. I was only trying to get a sense of you. That's what psychiatrist do. But you're right, you're here about your girlfriend… Elsa was it? Tell me more about her."

A smile rose to Anna's face just thinking about the blonde.

"Well…"

***************************************FROZEN*******************************************

About 45 minutes had past and Anna was just wrapping up her tale of how she'd met Elsa through her little brother Olaf, who was still hospitalized in a coma after an accident, and how they'd braved the rocky journey from acquaintances, to tentative friends, to lovers. She told Jane about Elsa's OCD and agoraphobia. She told her how sometimes, if Elsa was having a bad enough day, she'd scrub her skin raw. She told her how, no matter how much she reassured the blonde, Elsa would often chose to suffer in silence rather than open up to her. The more she talked about Elsa, the more she felt a weight she didn't even know was there, ease.

"And I just… I love her so, so much and I hate to see her suffer like this. I want her to get better. I want her to experience the world. I want her to experience the world with me..." Anna trailed off. The room fell silent and Jane just stared at Anna, who was now finding the patterns on her carpet very interesting. Finally, after a long pause, Jane sighed and cleared her throat.

"Well, Anna. Elsa truly sounds like a lovely girl indeed. It's clear that you care for her deeply and I'm glad you came to me with this. Elsa, it seems, is suffering from a very severe and rare case of OCD, which brought on the agoraphobia. I've personally never treated a patient with as severe a case." Jane paused and stood up, walking towards a bookcase and plucking a large brown book from it's contents.

"You see Anna, a common misconception about OCD is that those who suffer from it only care about cleaning and keeping everything spick and span. That's not necessarily true. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder is just as the name suggest. The patient is plagued by obsessive thoughts. These thoughts often come with extreme anxiety. Many people express this anxiety in different ways." she walked over and sat the book down in front of Anna, then took up the seat next to her.

"It can range anywhere from, obsessing over if you turned your oven off to the point where it consumes your every thought and you can't function properly until you know for sure it's off… or maybe the need to flip every lightswitch in your home on and off 25 times before you can go to bed, or the extreme hoarding like you see on those ghastly t.v. shows, or, and in Elsa's case, the obsessive need to have everything around her clean and the fear of being in public places, around large groups of people." Jane paused again to gather her thoughts as Anna listened, soaking everything Jane was saying in while simultaneously skimming over the book. It was a medical journal opened to a section that went in depth on OCD.

"I would like to meet with Elsa soon, Anna. Tomorrow if possible." Jane said seriously. Anna's head snapped back towards the brunette psychiatrist and she sputtered.

"T-t-tomorrow? Isn't that a little too soon? I mean, Elsa doesn't even know I'm here Jane. And she really, really doesn't like change or new people. She's definitely not going to come to your office, and I shudder to think what would happen if you came over to the apartment." the redhead tried to explain.

Jane pondered again, thinking of how she could get to Elsa. She was honestly worried for the blonde and wanted desperately to help her. Also, she'd be lying to herself if she didn't admit she was feeling even the least bit excited to take on a case this serious. While glancing around the room, Jane caught sight of her laptop and she had an idea.

"Didn't you say that before Elsa met your cousin in person, she would often chat via video call?"

"Yeah…? Oh.. yeah!" Anna said, at first not understanding what the brunette was getting at and then realization hitting her.

"Maybe you could set up a video call between us. It's not uncommon to have sessions over video chat. I often do it with clients who are out of state or on business trips."

"Maybe. But even with that, Elsa can be such a shy, shut off peron. She'd freeze you out…. Heck, she might freeze ME out just for asking." Anna said, worrying her bottom lip. She startled slightly when she felt a warm hand land on top of hers.

"Anna, do you want to help Elsa get control over her illness?" she asked, staring the redhead directly in the eyes. Anna nodded.

"Of course I do. It's want I want more than anything in the world." Anna answered earnestly.

"Then you need to find a way to get Elsa to agree to these sessions. I want to help her. And… I want to help you." Jane stated, squeezing Anna's hand lightly. Anna looked at her quizzically.

"Help me? What do you mean?"

Jane sighed.

"Anna… I've been studying you throughout this meeting. I've listened to you talk about Elsa, and avoid any personal questions about yourself-"

"That's because I'm here fo-"

"For Elsa, I know. And it's wonderful that you are. But I sense that all is not well with you either. You seemed to be extremely uncomfortable around psychiatrist and like you were hiding something. A past trauma perhaps?"

Anna stayed silent and looked away.

"Not only that, but you are Elsa's single emotional confidant. That's a lot of pressure for one person to carry. It has to be taking it's toll on you."

"I love Elsa." Anna simply responded. Jane smiled sympathetically.

"I know you do. But in caring for the ones you love, you can't forget to care for yourself."

Anna pulled her hand out of Jane's and stood up.

"Thank you for the advise Ms. Por-"

"Jane." she corrected. Anna smiled slightly but it didn't reach her eyes.

"Jane… But I have to be going now. I promised Elsa I'd be back by 7."

Jane stood as well and nodded.

"Of course Anna, I'll see you out." The two walked out of the office and towards the exit. Anna turned around when she reached the door.

"I'll speak to Elsa tonight, try to get her to agree. I'll insist if I must… but I don't know if I'll be able to get her to say yes."

"Just try your best. And an important thing to remember is to keep communication positive and clear, don't make her feel like a victim of her own disease. And from now own, don't play along with her OCD rituals. It may seem cruel, but you are enabling her habits when you indulge them."

Anna frowned but nodded her head in understanding.

"Okay. Well, thank you again Jane. I'll talk to you soon." she said, holding out a hand for Jane to shake. Jane took it in a light caress and shook it slowly.

"See you soon Anna. And please, think about what I said."

Anna didn't say a word, just nodded once and went out the door. Jane stared at her retreating figure and sighed.

***************************************FROZEN*******************************************

Anna arrived outside of Elsa's door. She stared at the frame for a long moment, mind going back to all the thing's Jane had said to her. She shook her head to rid herself of the thoughts and instead placed a huge smile on her face. "Okay."

"Snowflake, I'm bac- oh wow…" Anna walked through the door, only to find Elsa on her hands and knees scrubbing the already pristine floor with a small toothbrush. Anna slowly walked up to her.

"No! Stop at the edge of the kitchen, I just cleaned there." Elsa told Anna earnestly. Anna swallowed around the lump in her throat as she prepared herself for the conversation that was about to ensue.

"Hey Elsa, could you put that down and come here for a second? I need to talk to you."

Elsa shook her head no as she moved on to a different spot.

"Not right now Anna, I'm almost done, just give me-"

"No, Elsa… I need to speak with you now. Please put down the brush and come sit with me. Please?" Anna interrupted the blonde, who was now looking at her with hurt in her eyes. Anna felt sick. She felt like she was kicking the world's cutest puppy, but she recalled what Jane had said. She couldn't enable her anymore.

Elsa paused for a long moment, looking at the brush and bucket of water and back at Anna. The redhead sounded upset, but so was Elsa.

As the tightness in her chest increased, Elsa shook her head again and went back to scrubbing.

"I need to finish this." she said, tears blurring her vision. Anna heard the tears in Elsa's voice and stepped closer.

"Stop! Please Anna." Elsa begged, not wanting the girl to step on her clean floor. Not wanting her to get any closer. Anna stopped again but sighed.

"What's wrong Elsa? What happened sweetie?" She asked, concern dripping from her voice. Elsa squeezed her eyes shut and scrubbed harder at the sound. Clean. Clean is something I can control.

"Elsa?" Anna called out again. The blonde's shoulders were now shaking and Anna heard a choked back sob.

"Elsa! Please, just tell me wha-"

"Jane Porter!" Elsa yelled, throwing the toothbrush down.

The room went dead silent as Anna stared in shock at Elsa and Elsa stared at her own reflection in the floor. After what felt like an eternity of complete stillness Anna broke the silence.

"What?" she said, staring intently at the blonde.

"Dr. Jane Porter. She's a psychologist, right?" Elsa spoke coldly. Anna had never heard the blonde sound so cold and distant.

"How did yo-"

"I saw her name on your phone last night. I saw that you and her were going to meet up and my mind jumped to conclusions. I thought, 'Who is Jane Porter? Is she a friend of Anna's? Is Anna cheating in me with her?' I admit that I may have overreacted at one little text but all night I couldn't get it out of my head. I mean- I- if I ever lost you… if you ever finally got fed up with the mess that I am… I don't know what I would do…" Elsa stopped for a second to collect her thoughts.

"I ended up googling her name and the address she'd left you. I saw that she was a psychiatrist and I assumed you meet up with her about me?" Elsa asked, finally looking at the redhead hoping she'd say no. Anna looked away slightly and Elsa had her answer.

"I thought you were different Anna but you're just like them." she said accusingly, picking the brush back up and scrubbing even harder. Anna shook her head and furrowed her brow.

"Just like them- Elsa what are you talking about? I went to talk to Jane because I care for you, and I love you. I just want to help you-"

"STOP!" Elsa screamed. "That's the same thing they said." she continued.

"Who is 'they'?" Anna asked, moving closer to Elsa.

"Don't come over here, please Anna, just…" Elsa trailed off, continuing to scrub even as she saw Anna advancing.

"Who is 'they' Elsa?" Anna was persistent.

"My parents, my therapist, those people who started trying to pick the bones of my father's company before he was even cold in his grave. You're just like them. You want to send me to that institution just like them. They said the same things you are saying. That they only 'care about me', and then they force me to go to psychologist after psychologist because I was too much work for them and they only 'cared for me'. Then they forced to spend six months in that awful institute before Kai and Gerda finally got me out because they 'cared for me'…"

TBC

AN: This chapter is already entirely too long and I've been writing it for like 3 months now, no joke, so I need to end it here and pick right back up next chapter. I'm really eager to get this out since I haven't updated in forever and 2 days. Next chapter will probably be a bottle episode type chapter. Which means the entire chapter will just be Elsa and Anna in her apartment talking, mostly dialogue, no leaving, no interruptions. Just Anna and Elsa. BTW, I just barely passed a couple of college pysch courses, so I am in no way an officiant on OCD or counseling anything like that. I'm just half remembering what we learned in class. Anyway, thanks for reading.

If you have any questions, comments, or concerns, or you want to just bitch me out and tell me how terrible I am for waiting so long to update, don't hesitate to review or PM. I'll understand.

See ya kittens.