Let me know what you think!
A few months had passed and I had become closer to Ryan. He was one of the first people that I came out as gay. I was afraid that he would become nervous and not want to be friends with me anymore. Except it was the total opposite. The conversation came up and I opened up to him.
"Ryan, I've been in love with someone for a long time and I don't know how to get her out of my head. I just have fallen in love and I can't seem to let go of her." I said while realizing that I gave away the gender of the person that I loved. He didn't seem startled or freaked out, it seemed like he had already known this about me.
"Yeah, I know that feeling. I had this girlfriend in high school who I was totally in love with, and to be honest, I thought I wanted to marry her." He stopped talking and took a deep breath in.
"What happened with her?" I asked, wanting to know where this story was going.
"I was really thinking of asking her to marry me, but I don't think she saw me in the same way that I saw her. We went our separate ways after high school and I haven't seen her since." He looked down, thinking back on this old relationship that he had had.
"Why did you two break up? You don't have to answer that if you don't feel comfortable." I said.
"No, it's fine. I caught her with another man and I broke things off with her right away. I don't want to be played by anyone because I don't deserve that." He said.
"Well that's true, you don't deserve that."
We spent most of the time at college in classes, studying together, eating together, trying to set each other up with people and just enjoying our friendship. Time past quickly and it was already a week before winter break. Ryan and I were studying for finals and he brought up the topic of what I was doing over vacation.
"Are you going back to Boston for the break?" He asked while setting down his pencil.
"I was planning to, that is if my parents want me to be there." I laughed nervously.
"Well I have something to ask and you don't have to say yes if you don't want to. My brother is getting married and he said I could have a plus one. Would you want to be my plus one?" He asked knowing that we would go just as friends. I thought for a few seconds until he started talking again. "The wedding is going to be a week-long cruise to the Bahamas. It leaves from New York and goes to Florida, then it goes to the Bahamas. I think it could be fun and it would be a blast if you wanted to come too." He stopped talking and looked at me.
"A cruise to the Bahamas?! Yes! Count me in! Do I have to pay anything?" I asked hoping that it was already paid for.
"Nope, it's all paid for. Only bring a little cash to spend on things, but besides that, everything is already paid for." He responded and I smiled. I wanted to go on a cruise for a long time but I could never afford it.
Later that night I called my mother and told her about the plans I made earlier with Ryan.
"Hi, Ma. I wanted to tell you that a week during winter break, Ryan invited me to go on a week-long cruise with him to the Bahamas. His-" Before I could finish what I was saying my mother cut me off.
"A WEEK LONG CRUISE! We can't afford that! Ryan may have a lot of money but we can't do that. Where-" I cut her off before she could talk me out of it.
"Ma! It's already paid for by his family. His brother is getting married and he asked me to be his plus one. So I said yes because I really want to go on this cruise to the Bahamas." I waited for her response.
"Oh, well that changes things. You would go as his plus one? Do you think he's interested in you, romantically?" My mother asked hoping that I would get together with a man.
"No Ma, he's not interested in me like that. I'm not interested in him that way either. We are just friends. So can I go? Please please please!" I begged her over the phone.
"Yes, but you will have to explain to your father why you will be missing his opening to his new work building. He has been talking non stop about how he is excited to have all of his children together." I had forgotten about the opening of the building.
"Oh crap! I totally forgot about the opening. Ugh! I want to go to it, but this is also a once in a lifetime trip. I'll talk to him tomorrow about it." I said as I texted Ryan from my laptop.
"Hi! So I just talked to my mom about the cruise. I can go, I just totally forgot about my dad's opening to his building. It's okay, I think he will be fine with it"
He responded.
"Okay. I hope everything goes okay and good luck on your final! Good Night!"
I sent the message and continued to talk to my mom about the cruise.
"Yes, so I will talk to Dad about it. But for now, I have to get ready for bed. I have a final tomorrow that I need enough sleep for."
"Okay, Jane. Good luck on your final and I'll talk to you in the next few days." We hung up the phone and I got into bed. That night I dreamed about the cruise and the wedding, but instead of his brother getting married, it was my brother getting married.