We sat in silence for a little while. Ryan looked over at me, not knowing what to say. He finally broke the silence.
"Well, she sure is pretty!" He smirked while he spoke. I rolled my eyes at him.
"She sure is. I just don't understand why she's here. Do you know why she's here." I asked him.
"She might be one of the guests. If we get off the ground and walk around, I could find out." He was right, but I wasn't ready to leave the spot in the shade.
"I just spent so much time liking her. The feeling of knowing nothing could happen between us, but the feeling of love that just wouldn't leave. I wanted to stop liking her for so long that it hurt. When I went to college, it went away. I felt free. I felt excited that I could finally get back to my life." He listened. "I felt like I could be friends with her and not have those romantic feelings for her. I've finally got to that point where I thought I could interact with her if I ever saw her."
"I wouldn't call this interacting, I'd call it hiding." He laughed.
"Shut up, I didn't think this would be the place that I would see her. It was just surprising." We talk a little longer when I feel the urge to get up off the ground. Ryan got up too. He nodded like he was following my lead.
"You ready?" He asked.
"Yeah, let's go." We walked around a bit exploring more of the boat. I wasn't sure if this was because I was trying to keep seeing Maura Isles for last, but I didn't feel like seeing her right away. This feeling wasn't like I had felt back in high school. I actually felt comfortable and not scared to see her. We heard the splashing of the pools and children laughing. We turned the corner and saw tons of people talking and hanging around the water. It was a beautiful day to spend by the pool. Ryan walked over to some people and started chatting with them.
"This is my friend Jane." He motioned for me to join their conversation. I introduced myself and found out that they were super nice people. We spent some time mingling with his family. I looked around the room and I saw her again. We made eye contact and I smiled. The man next to her looked over at her and out his arm around her waist. I immediately looked away. I don't know why I felt the need to look away, but I did.
"I'm going to use the bathroom." I told Ryan. I walked away from the crowd of people into the hallway. I took out my phone to call Frost.
"Hey Jane! I haven't heard from you in a couple days. How are you? Did you land? Are you on the boat?" So many questions in such a short time.
"Woah, woah, woah…slow down. I am here on the boat. It's huge, you would never believe how big it is. But what I really wanted to tell you is that Maura is here." Silence at the other end of the line.
"WHAT? She's there? On the boat? How? Why?" He couldn't believe it.
"Frost, you sound like me when I first saw her. I don't know why she's here. I haven't talked to her yet."
"This is crazy! How do you feel?" He asked.
"Honestly, at first I was freaking out a bit, but now I don't feel that way. I am actually interested in having a conversation with her. I think I've grown a lot in the last year. I don't have feelings for her anymore. I think I could just be friends with her." I smiled knowing that I felt better talking to Frost.
"Is she there with anyone or just there by herself?"
"I think she is with some guy. They were at the pool together. He could be a literal model. Frost, you should have seen his muscles." We talked about other things as well, it was good to talk to him again.
"I'm glad that you're there with Ryan. From what you've told me about him, he seems like a pretty decent guy. Angela would love for you two to get together." We both laughed at that. I lost track of time talking to Frost that I didn't see Maura walked out into the hallway.
"I can't wait to see you and tell you all about this. Uh, Maura just walked into the hallway. I'll call you later" I whispered to him. We hung up the phone and I walked back towards the glass doors that led into the pool room. Maura looked up from her phone, her golden hair falling on her shoulders. She smiled when I walked closer towards her.
"Hey Jane! It's so great to see you. I have't seen you in a long time, how have you been?" She asked. I felt comfortable talking to her. Those feelings didn't come back.
"Hey Maura, I've been doing really well actually. College has been great so far and I've made some good friends, including Ryan."
"Ah, that's why you're on this boat. I was trying to figure that out." She smiled, her skin was glowing. She looked even more beautiful up close than from afar.
"Yeah, we actually met the first night I moved in. Do you know his family or—?"
"Uh no, my friend has been friends with Ryan's family for a long time. I'm just a plus one" We laughed and I wanted to ask her more when she started speaking. "Wow, you look different, you seem a lot happier and confident". I wanted to tell her that she looked great too, but I didn't want to overstep any boundaries.
"Thank you. I feel a lot happier now than I did back on high school. Kinda glad to not be back there to be honest." The thought of high school brought back the memory that I had confessed my feelings towards her without knowing.
"Yeah, the last time I saw you was at graduation, when you ran off without saying goodbye." She smiled sweetly when saying this. I could tell that she wasn't trying to be mean but I could sense a little sadness in the way she said them. I looked at the floor.
"Yeah, I wasn't sure how to react in that situation. I don't know if you remember exactly why I bolted, but I uh…" I trailed off not really knowing what to say. We were interrupted by multiple people walking out the door. The same guy who was with Maura before walked out and put his arm around her.
"There you are. I was wondering where you went." He looked over at me and reached out his hand. "Hi, I'm Ian Faulkner. Maura's boyfriend." I shook his hand and looked over at Maura. She looked conflicted, not knowing what to do.
"Hi, I'm Jane, friend of Ryans." I said while shaking his hand. I was interested in how she referred to him as her friend, not her boyfriend. I kept my gaze on her. I smiled and turned to join up with Ryan who was waiting for me.
"So how'd it go?" He asked when I started walking back to my room with him.
"Interesting. She has a boyfriend even though she referred to him as her friend. But other than that, it went okay," I linked my arm with his and looked back at Maura for one last glance before we turned the corner. She was still watching me while her boyfriend was talking to some other guys.
"The big dinner is tonight, so let's focus on that." We made it back to the room and we talked for hours before getting ready for the dinner.
I was still thinking of the interaction with Maura. I thought I was okay, but seeing the way she watched me, all of those feelings that I was trying to keep hidden were crawling back to take over.