Catten90: ''Write reply to review here''

Pint-sized-she-bear: Thank you, it's only going to get a wee bit more depressing.

Dame LeeLee: I didn't make you wait that long XD

Guest: I will be sticking to the original plot line, with a few twists along the way. I won't be doing a lot of switching from here on, don't worry.

Chapter 92 – The world agrees.

'My Katza, no-' Fenris said placing his hands on her shoulders and perching on the edge of the bed as he did so.

'I'm not lying in bed for another day, Fenris,' she says as she gets up, stubbornly and awkwardly, he doesn't want to force her to lie down so he stops pushing. It had been four days since she found Leandra. She had been healed by Anders, but it was the mental injuries that were causing her the most problems. She pulled the quilt away, brushing away her Fiancé, who just as stubbornly tried to get her to lie back down, this time vocally. She sighed heavily and he paused allowing her to look at him. His concern was evident and he looked just as tired and worn as she felt. It had been an awful few days. Whereas she had slept, albeit it not in the most conventional ways, he had not.

'You have not slept enough, my Katza,' he says quietly, touching her cheek softly in affection. Dressed in a pair of leggings and a shirt, he looked relaxed, but the tautness of his shoulders and the line of his jaw said otherwise. She hadn't slept, which meant neither had he. Her dreams, nightmares had come back with a vengeance, with the added horror of her new experiences. She looked away feeling guilty. Not only was she keeping him awake at night, he made her try to sleep during the day. Something that she was determined to change. She worried about Garrett, she heard him at times, the loss of his mother as well as having already lost Bethany and Carver; hit him particularly hard. She could hear the house taking the most damage, in his upset rage as he threw things and set various items on fire. Fenris notices her glance to the door, the worry for another. He runs his hand through his hair and exhales heavily through his nose. The best thing for her would be sleep, but deep down, he knew that she could help with Hawke. Isabela had been no use at all. No-one could even find her, let alone point her in the direction of her distraught lover. He cursed mentally at the thought of the pirate and looked at Makatza properly. Slowly he nods standing up and holding out his hands to her. Smiling she takes his offer of help and stands up shakily, before she instantly hugs him tightly. She was used to the automatic flinch that would run through his body at the bodily contact and she had learnt to ignore it. Within moments, his stiffness had disappeared and he hugged her back without reservation, burying his head into her hair. The moment of peacefulness was needed for both of them, it did more than expected. Makatza could feel the warmth of his body pour into her as she felt his heart beat against his chest, she held his clothing tightly, enjoying the simple and often overlooked gesture.

'Where is he?' She asks eventually. 'Where's Isabela as well?'

Fenris sighs and pulls away feeling her hair; which she had worn loose, fall between his fingers. 'The pirate, no-one has even seen. Let alone find. Hawke went to her the first night and we have not seen her since. He will not speak of what happened between them either. Hawke is currently in Leandra's room. He is having a quiet episode,' he says with a bitter tone. He preferred the angry episodes to the quiet ones, those he could handle, he simply needed to restrain Hawke and then when he had tired, put him to bed. The more sombre and incredibly less violent moments, he didn't know what to do. They could last for several hours or more, normally he would wait until Hawke had fallen asleep and then simply pick him up and then take him to his room.

'I see,' Makatza says biting her lip. 'Okay, I need to get dressed and then I'll sort Garrett out. Then I'm pretty sure I know where to find Isabela.' She speaks as she wanders over to the wardrobe and begins pulling out clothing. Fenris looks at her, noticing the fresh scars over her arms and shoulders. The gash on her thigh, showing as she was only wearing cotton shorts and a tank top. It made the guilt roll in his stomach. He had shared a few sharp words with Makatza that night, the rare moments when she was awake. About how she shouldn't go running off into danger without him. At all, if he had his way. But those words were few and it was his own guilt that he felt he was projecting. That he hadn't protected her. She hadn't argued and he knew that she wasn't listening to him. Which was understandable seeing what had just happened, so he had dropped the subject and simply tried to get her to sleep. That was when they first discovered the issue with the lord of the household.

'Hawke, he reacts violently at the mention of Leandra, I would avoid making him angry. He's unstable,' Fenris says quietly, turning his head away as Makatza gets changed. He noticed the tensing of her shoulders and makes a mental note to avoid using Leandra's name in the future. Fenris wouldn't hesitate to punch Hawke if he raised a hand in anger to Makatza. Knocking him out would be the easiest and quickest thing to do.

Makatza pulls on a bra and changes into a T-shirt, plain purple with capped sleeves and a v-neck cut, with a pair of stonewashed, skinny jeans. She finishes getting dressed and walks past Fenris dropping a kiss onto his head as she does so. 'I don't think what I'm going to do will be something that panders to him,' she says as she grabs a couple of hair bands and flicks her hair over her head in order to put it up. Fenris watches with half an amused smile on his lips, but inner concern over what she had said. He opened his mouth to inquire about what she meant. 'So how long has been in her room this time?'' Makatza asks softly as she finishes her hair.

Distracted by her question he simply answers her, 'he's been in there for a few hours at least. Since he woke up, he crawled into her room,' Fenris sighs.

'Ah. Okay. Well, I'm going to go sort him out, this has to stop,' Makatza says softly. 'Get Orana, Bohdan and Sandal, we're all going to the study,' she sighs. Time to face the truth.

…..

Garrett sobbed as he held one of Leandra's favourite books in his hands. He was sitting beside her bed, a few empty wine bottles around him. The burning in his heart rose with each moment that his mother wasn't with him. He hadn't washed, hadn't taken care of himself since that night. He still wore the blood stained robe, covered in dirt in grime. Any attempts to get him to change or clean went badly into a rage. So Aveline and Fenris had given up. Slowly he slumped onto his side, he had lost everyone precious to him, even Isabela had abandoned him. He hadn't even thought about Makatza, every time he had, he felt anger. She was there. She should have saved her. It was her fault. He went down this mental road a couple of times a day, but each time, he simply succeeded in making himself feeling worse. It wasn't Makatza's fault. She wasn't even supposed to be in this world. It was his duty to protect his family, and he was the one that had failed. Multiple times. Why they still trusted him, he had no idea.

'Orana! More!' He called out, his voice breaking. He picked up a bottle and drained what was left in it. He waited a few minutes in his drunken stupor, normally she replied to him. 'Orana!' He screamed again, damning the elf to the deepest part of the fade. He threw the bottle at the door in impatience. When there was no sound of her climbing the stairs or even a vocal reply he growled in infuriation and shakily got to his feet. He placed the book to the side and let his fingers linger on the cover as a tear trickled down his cheek. He sniffed, wiping his nose on his sleeve, as he tried to leave the room he was overcome with a fresh wave of despair, falling to his knees, he wept. His throat sore and hoarse as he begged Leandra to come back. But, as before, nothing happened. He screamed to the fade, to any demon listening to bring them back. He'd give them anything that they wanted, his life, his heart, his soul, just to have them back. The spirit realm was silent and he came to the realisation that he was going to be alone, and that no demon would incur his wrath. Half an hour had passed since he had called Orana and demanded she come to him, she hadn't shown. Voices had spoken in a quiet whisper, but that was all he had heard. His irritation and growing sobriety forced him to his feet and towards the bedroom door. He crushed the broken glass under his boots as he pulled the door open in a drunken jerk. 'Orana!' He yelled again, expecting to hear some commotion. When nothing happened, he frowned. 'Bohdan! Sandal!' He tried. Still nothing. The alcohol swam around his mind, mixed with grief. He didn't want to sober up and it looked like everyone was out. They'd abandoned him as well. Holding onto the railing of the stairs tightly he stumbled to the foyer, cursing his household. Bubble trots out the kitchen and whines as he looks at his master. Garrett called him over and petted his head, a little too hard, but Bubble made no comment. 'Where are they boy? Where's Orana? She's got the key to the cellar,' he slurs. Bubble tilts his head and then goes over to the study door and scratches at the wood. 'They're...they're in the study? Hiding from me? I've been calling them!' He says angrily as he walks over, tripping over his feet slightly as he opens the study door.

Makatza stood in the study, Fenris beside her. Elgon lying at her feet. Aveline, Bohdan, Sandal and Orana were standing on the upper level looking down. Bubble wandered in and licked Makatza's bare foot as he passed. 'Thank you Bubble,' Makatza said softly, knowing that the easiest way to get Garrett in here was with his hound. Fenris crosses his arms, he had no idea what Makatza was planning to do and he didn't see this going well. She had made him promise that he wasn't to move from his spot. No matter what happened. He had made an inner decision to break this promise if anything physical should happen.

'What the fuck is going on?' Garrett says slamming the door. 'Orana! Where were you when I called you?' He demands, Makatza frowns at his reaction, but says nothing. 'You're supposed to come when I call!'

'I'm sorry Messere, miss Kat-' She began, but stopped as Makatza raised her hand to interrupt the young woman.

'No. No more,' she says simply. 'Garrett Malcolm Hawke, as of this moment, you are no longer allowed any more alcohol.' Makatza holds her head up high and her arms loose by her side. She knows that he'll get angry and loud. She's ready for it. But the truth hurts, that's why it's rarely told. His eyes focus on her and the frown simply grows.

'What the fuck did you just say to me?' Garrett says, his voice dangerously quiet.

'That you, are to have no more alcohol,' she repeats, knowing full well that he heard her. 'At all. Orana has given me the key and in case you were going to use your magic in order to unlock the door, I've had the cellar emptied, temporarily to my estate. I've notified all pubs and vendors that sell alcohol, that Lord Hawke is not to have any at all. If you are found drinking, I've asked Aveline to have you arrested. To which she has agreed.' Makatza states simply. She could see his anger growing the more she spoke. 'This is an intervention, Garrett. You are not coping well and the alcoholism isn't making this any easier on anyone.'

'Who the fuck do you think you are?! Fuck you! This is my home! I dragged you from the damn gutter and supported you, and this is how you fucking well repay me? You're nothing but a cheap tart, coasting by on your looks and your tits!' He says in blind anger, thankful that he now has a reason to take it out on someone. 'You watched while that monster cut off my mother's head and you didn't do a damn fucking thing! The spotlight always has to be on you! No-one cares that she's dead, they just all keep asking about you! How horrible it must have been to find her, to see it happen! You're fucking useless, I don't know why we dragged your sorry arse back through the fade!' He spits. Makatza feels his words bite deep into her heart, he was right in a way, but she held herself tall. He can apologise later, she can cry later for that fact. At this moment, she needs to stay strong. She could practically feel Fenris' anger but she had made him promise, so she didn't even look at him to confirm her suspicions. Garrett doesn't stop shouting. 'You're just like everyone else! Out to get all that you can, no matter who gets in the way. The more drama the better!' He inhales deeply, tears brimming in his eyes. 'She didn't ask for any of this, she was just being helpful. That's all she ever does...did. She was so kind. She just wanted to help people...' he sobbed. Makatza nodded. She knew that it would boil down to Leandra in the end.

'Yes, she did. That's what I'm doing for you,' she says simply. Garrett shakes his head.

'No you're not, you're doing this for your own gain, you're just like-'

'Just like everyone else?' Makatza finished for him. 'Yes, I suppose you could say that. I am doing this for my own gain. As in I don't want to see you like this. You're being the selfish one. Look at you! You're pathetic. This isn't the Garrett Hawke I know. The one that fought through an entire Carta to help rescue me, having to fight a damn Magister Darkspawn at the end as well. Garrett you're a fucking mess. You're still wearing the same clothes, you've not washed, you've argued with Isabela to the point where she isn't here. And, I don't want to know what about. Not to mention the fact that you've treated, Orana, Fenris and the others like total shit and all they want to do is help you. What would Leandra-'

'Don't you dare say her name! You don't get to say it!' Garrett bellowed at her, Makatza frowned and stepped forward. She leant back and without ceremony punched him on the jaw with a sickening thwack. She was going to slap him, but changed her mind. He was being an complete arse.

'What the fuck do you think Leandra would say if she could see you like this?!' Makatza hissed at him. Her blow had knocked him into the desk and he now half leant, half supported himself on it, touching his split lip. 'You're a fucking fool. Yes, Leandra is dead. Yes, it is my fault, I could have stopped him if I had been able to bring myself to do something, anything. But I couldn't and I didn't. So here we are. Your mother has gone Garrett, no-one is more sorry than I. But your life is still happening. You need to pull yourself together. We're here to help you through this, I'm not claiming it will be easy, that it's the normal thing. But you will not wallow in self pity. You will not treat your family like this, you sure as hell will not treat your friends and the people that care about you like this!' She says simply wringing her hand. He looked at her and then down at the blood on his fingers, he let himself fall from the desk as he sobbed, his weak, tired cries the only sound in the room. Makatza stood, breathing heavily, before inhaling deeply and nodding. The others hadn't moved and Fenris was glad that she had punched him. He was going to do it himself if Garrett continued.

Slowly she stepped forward and knelt beside him, tilting his head up to look at his lip, Garrett sniffed. 'I'm sorry,' he said, his voice thick. Makatza smiled and felt her own tears brim her eyes. 'I'm so, so, sorry,' he repeated. Makatza hushed him and pulled him close for a hug. He cried harder and wrapped his arms around her waist as he buried his head in her collarbone and cried. Fenris looked at Aveline and shared a nod, Aveline shepherded the others and the canines out the study. Fenris waited until they had all gone before relaxing a little. It had gone better than he had expected, but at the same time, he couldn't have imagined what was going to be said. Garrett was still sobbing and he could tell that Makatza was crying as well. He moved over to them and with a little of Makatza's help, lifted Hawke to his feet. Makatza wiped her eyes and smiled weakly at Fenris as they carried him up to his room. Fenris got a little annoyed when Makatza found out that she was actually going to have to help Garrett have a bath and get changed.

'Well either you can do it, or I can,' she says simply with an amused smile. 'He's a brother to me Fenris, you know this,' she chuckles.

'It is not that. Why can't Orana simply help him? No, I realised what I said after I said it. Fine, but if you need any help, let me know,' he says simply kissing her forehead. Makatza smiles and touches his arm in reply before taking Garrett into the bathroom. There was actually some giggling from the bath, which caused Fenris to be a little on edge for the next hour that Makatza and Garrett were alone in the room. Sooner rather than later they emerged, Makatza was a little wet down the front and Garrett was clean and dressed in clean clothing. She had even managed to trim his beard a little and neaten it up. With Fenris' help they put him to bed and as they left they took the rest of the empty bottles. After putting the rubbish into the bin, Makatza leant against the kitchen table. Garrett had fallen asleep a few minutes after his head hit the pillow, he was going to be in agony tomorrow, but that was a few hours away yet.

'I'm glad this is going to be sorted soon,' Makatza says quietly rubbing her eyes. Fenris smiles softly and moves across the room, pulling her close to him as he kisses her gently. She leans into his embrace and makes a little content noise.

'Things are always darkest before dawn,' he murmurs against her lips. 'But I will be beside you, you will not be in the dark alone.' Makatza can't help but smile and she wraps her arms around his shoulders.

'The funeral is soon,' she mumbles, remembering conversations with Gamlen, another reason she had to give Garrett a kick up the arse.

'Aye, my Katza. Three days time,' he says quietly, simply holding her. Hawke should have to come to most of his senses by that point and hopefully nothing more dramatic will happen. Hopefully. But knowing this city, it would just be one more thing after the other and Fenris had a foreboding feeling. Something told him that before they could have their attempted happily ever after, they were going to be in the dark and pain a lot longer.

It was raining. Normally Makatza would complain about the cliché, but today, it seemed appropriate. It made it feel that the whole city was mourning the loss of Leandra. If it had been sunshine and rainbows, she was sure she would feel a lot worse than she already did. Standing at the side of the procession, she watched at Carver, Garrett, Fenris, and Gamlen carried Leandra's coffin into the tomb, she was to be buried with her parents. She held Aveline's hand who like herself, was dressed in black, the traditional style gown and veils. Only Varric was the other guest from the companions, Merrill and Anders deemed it too dangerous to join, though they sent their condolences. Sebastian performed the ceremony, along with a sister of the Chantry. Makatza watched as they left the tomb, the stone door being slid shut with a heart breaking thud. Garrett took his place next to Aveline, Gamlen stood in between Carver and Garrett, a normally stoic man, his tears were clear in his eyes, though he held himself proud. Fenris nodded at Aveline and moved next to Makatza, she sniffed and leant her head onto his shoulder. The rain was cold and heavy, but only the other guests used parasols to shield themselves, the family of the deceased barely noticed it. Sebastian performed last rites, blessing her soul to the Maker's side, guided by Andraste his eternal bride. Ceremony complete, the procession made their way to the Hawke Estate. Makatza held Fenris' hand tightly, Aveline had spotted her husband and left a moment earlier. Makatza had spoken to Garrett about Isabela, apparently words were said, unkind ones on his behalf. No-one had been able to find her, but Makatza had found out that her ship had left the dockyard. She was adamant that Isabela wouldn't be gone for long. She was the only one with this thought.

'I can't believe she's gone,' Garrett says in a sigh. He pats Carver on the shoulder, he was wearing his dress uniform, Makatza had jumped out her skin when she saw the Templar, but soon realised. Carver nodded and wiped his eyes, he had tried to hold himself, but the loss of a mother wasn't something to be strong about. Garrett had shed a few tears, but he had recovered well from his moment of weakness, as he called it, and hadn't touched alcohol since. Makatza looked back at the tomb, her fingers leaving Fenris', he nodded at Hawke and Carver who had also paused, and they kept on walking. Makatza looked at the marble stone, covered in Leandra's favourite flowers. She looked back at Fenris, who wore his half smile, he brushed his hair back, the rain causing it to stay slicked back. It made Makatza smile a little. She nodded and wiped away her tears as she joined him again.

'Garrett?' Maktaza said as she spotted a figure walking towards them. She was barely recognisable. It was Isabela. But, dressed, literally in a dress. The same style as Aveline and Makatza. She wore her hair pinned up, the veil covering half her features. The only jewellery she wore was her lip stud, she had taken the rest off. She stood demurely to the side, guided by Elgon who had been waiting at the bottom of the trail. Garrett looked around at Makatza as she spoke and then look to where she was gazing. His jaw dropped a little and he had to look back at Makatza for confirmation. He patted Carver's shoulder again before walking over to Isabela, who looked incredibly nervous. Makatza couldn't hear what was said at the distance they were, plus rain. But she watched as they stood, Isabela talking animatedly before Garrett simply stopped her, placing a finger on her lips, before gently kissing her. Makatza smiled and looked at Fenris who nodded, she pulled on his hand gently and lead the others back, leaving the couple to it.

Once back at the Hawke Estate, Makatza settled into the position of hostess. Most of it meant accepting people's condolences, looking upset and as usual, squashing any rumours of Leandra's death. Confirming a few rumours concerning herself at the same time. Yes, she was now engaged, yes, it was to an elf. Yes, that elf over there. Indeed he does look different. Yes, he is a dangerous man. No, no date had been set. Yes, it will be horrible knowing that Leandra wouldn't be there. The same questions, over and over. Her replies had become monotone and she was no longer calm and collected. Makatza had become testy and short tempered. Elgon whined as he sat next to Fenris, who stood next to the fire, simply watching her. He nodded to the wolf who got up and trotted over to Makatza, the crowd parting like water as the large wolf walked past. He went up to Makatza and pulled at her fingers, motioning her to leave the rather large crowd she had become surrounded with. Fenris smiled softly and let himself into the study, shutting the noise and commotion between the rooms with a click of the door. It was only a few minutes later that the noise flooded back in as Makatza entered the room. Elgon wandered in happily and jumped onto the armchair, making himself comfortable. Makatza sighed heavily before shutting the door again, only then did she relax, her shoulders fell slightly and she inhaled deeply.

'Feel better?' Fenris asks softly looking at the letters strewn across the desk. Makatza nodded and then agreed with a small exhale.

'Aye, I didn't think people would be using this occasion to gossip. I was wrong and honestly not surprised,' she mumbles, rubbing her eyes. Fenris chuckles lightly and moves a few pieces of parchment aside, spotting Makatza's name, her married name at that. He picks up the letter and scans it over, feeling his heart stop. He looks at her and then back to the letter.

'Have... have you read this yet?' He asks, his voice quavering a little. Makatza tilted her head and walked over to him, taking the letter from his willing fingers.

'Why? What is it? It's not another summoning to Meredith is...it?' She says as she reads the letter. She looks at Fenris, her facial expressions hidden by the veil. She feels all the air leave her in a breath. Clutching the table she inhales deeply. 'Tell, tell me this is a joke,' she says holding the paper tightly.

'I do not think so,' he mumbles holding her upright as he takes the letter from her. Stumbling on a few of the trickier words, he re-reads it. His face pales a little more. It indeed say what he thought it had the first time he had read it. 'They know of our engagement, correct? They do not expect you to marry some Lord?' He asks.

'Oh, she knows all right. Trust me, I doubt this was her decision,' Makatza says standing up straight and pulling her veil off. 'I can't believe it. I just... Vicountess?! Are they insane?'

Well, XD There you go. I've been hinting at it for chapters and chapters now. The next eight chapters should be very thrilling. Time to start wrapping this up nicely. Mwhahahahahahaaa.

Anyway. Please drop a review if you found this chapter depressing or such.