Kurt is freaking out.
Naively, he'd thought he was passed that. He woke up that morning mostly resigned to his fate. After having the water freeze when he had attempted to do the dishes the night before. His complete inability to take a hot bath, as the steamy water he touched was immediately chilled. He was also beginning to suspect that he somehow became impervious to heat as well, seeing as the AC in his house is broken and he'd slept under the covers without so much as sweating through the entire night. His basement is always smoldering in the summer.
By the time his usual hot cup of coffee becomes iced that morning, he'd considered himself done. He'd genuinely believed the flailing and choking panic was behind him now. That he'd been heading towards a jumpy sort of dealing acceptance and nothing would freak him out that badly ever again. He'd thought nothing could.
He was wrong. Although the fact that everyone else was equally alarmed by their councilors attempt on their lives helps a little. He has the vague notion that something might be going on with Puck and the unnamed cute boy since their reaction to the affair was way faster than his own.
He's attempting to accept the fact that Puck and Britt have apparently saved his life, since their councilor is wielding a long pipe and smashing things violently enough for Kurt to believe he wants them dead, when he feels himself slide and slam into some lockers, falling on his ass as he backs away.
A corpse falls at his feet. Kurt-Kurt can't even process what he's looking at, at first, then the rusty smell of blood hits him and he recognizes the guy who hadn't joined in on the sing along the day before.
His power reacts to his fear, freezing the blood he'd slid in and creeping forward, freezing the corpse in its entirety. Kurt scrambles back, catches the motion of something silver coming towards him and barely manages to roll out-of-the-way.
Their homicidal councilor has managed to catch up then.
He's right behind Kurt, already lifting up the pipe he's just tried to brain Kurt with for another attempt. Some instinct drive's Kurt to high kick the weapon out of his hands and he has the vague thought that he owes coach Sylvester a hug for all of those torturous cheer leading drills.
The councilor simply advances towards him, seemingly willing to throttle Kurt without help from his weapon of choice. He lunges, and Kurt feels a hand wrap tightly around his throat. He clutches at it, his power rises to the occasion and freezes the body the appendage was attached to solid.
"What the fuck?" Santana demands. Kurt wishes he knew.
"Is he-is he dead?" Britt asks tentatively. He hopes not.
"Looks like it," Puck sounds fascinated. Kurt finds it in himself to resent him for it.
"He is." Unnamed cute boy confirms soberly, eyes wide and horrified.
Kurt can sympathies. He feels numb, he doesn't know what expression is on his face. He's just killed someone, what are you supposed to look like after doing something as irredeemably despicable as that?
"How do you know?" Kurt asks, willing to ignore everything he knows about biology in the hopes that he might not be a killer after all.
"I can't hear his thought anymore." He says slowly.
"So you can really hear what I'm thinking?" Puck asks.
"Yes, although travelling back in time maybe even cooler." He says, giving Puck a shaky smile.
"Wait-what?" Santana says, "Who lucked out with the time powers?"
"Puck did." Unnamed cute boy answers, turns to Kurt, "And my name is Blaine."
"What kind of bullshit is that!" Santana hisses, suddenly incensed, "I get some lame make people horny power. Puck can travel through time suddenly. Kurt is the fucking ice guy from the X-men and midget here is professor-X. Britt can-what can Britt do?"
"I think she's super strong." Puck answers, motions to the ice statue formerly known as their councilor, "She threw a couch at this guy the first time around."
"Are you super strong now Britt?" Kurt asks her, curious.
Brittany, in typical Brittany fashion, shrugs, "I dunno. I didn't sleep last night and I'm not tired, no matter how many push ups, tumbles, and back flips I did. It's way easier to move."
"So Brittany is all bionic now." Santana says, bitterly. "In what world is that fair?"
"You make people horny?" Blaine asks, raising his eyebrows, "How does that work?"
"I touch them and they suddenly want to bang me," Santana scowls, "I don't think they remember it though. Great-I'm like a freaking instant roofy."
"No way." Blaine says, shaking his head in disbelief.
Santana stretches her arm out and touches his cheek.
The transformation is instant. Blaine pitches a tent in his pants, licks his lips wantonly. "You want my cock don't you?" He rasps, flushed, pupils blown as he frantically surged forward."I'm gonna fuck you so hard."
Santana dropped her hand and backed away.
Blaine blinked, looked down at the situation in his pants and blushed, "What just happened?
"You wanted to fuck Santana." Puck smirks, "Best. Power. Ever."
"But I'm gay!" Blaine protests.
Kurt tries to ignore that. Mostly he fails.
Santana scoffs, "Doesn't seem to matter."
She reaches for him suddenly. Kurt tries to back away but her hand lands on his neck. He waits for a moment, shocked still, expecting her powers to work…Nothing happens. Santana stares at him, incredulous, before her hand drops away.
"Are you kidding me?" Santana says, "Are you seriously too gay for my super power to work? Looks like you might be a little bi Frodo."
Puck laughs.
"What are we going to do about the bodies?" Britt questions absently, and their brief little vacation from reality comes to an end.
"What can we do about it?" Kurt muses aloud, "Should we call the police. Tell them it was self-defense and my new uncontrollable ice powers froze them solid?"
"We can bury the bodies." Puck proposes bluntly. "We wash the uniforms, tell anyone who asks that neither of them showed up today. No one has to know."
"Do you think the storm did something to them, like it did to us?" Blaine asks suddenly.
"Well I thought he was somewhat sane yesterday." Santana replies, "So probably."
"Speak for yourself." Kurt mutters absently, trying not to think about the implications of that, "Did you see what he was wearing?"
"It doesn't matter." Puck says, scrubbing his fingers through his Mohawk, "As far as anyone else is concerned we're a bunch of delinquents. If we show up with two dead bodies and a really crazy story they're just gonna think we did it."
Kurt's surprised by the logic of it, but he killed their councilor, accident or no. He can't help but think he deserves whatever punishment the court decides fits his crime. "I can prove at least part of it. I can make more ice."
Santana crosses her arms, "And then what? We all get locked up in some lab and get experimented on? Pucks right. We should bury the bodies, clean up the mess and pretend it never happened."
"But they're dead!" Blaine exclaims, "Their families deserve to know that. That they're gone now. Not just have them disappear and never be heard from again. They deserve closure. To know what happened to their loved ones..."
Kurt nods slowly. Blaine's right.
"They're dead and yeah it sucks for their families. But what about mine? " Santana snarls, "You think the governments gonna give my parents any notice before they snatch me up? Think about that. No one deserved what happened to them, alright? We didn't ask for some freaky storm to mess with our genes or whatever it did. I'm sure cap kid didn't ask anyone to kill him. And councilor guy didn't want to go crazy and try to kill us. But it happened so now we've got to deal."
Kurt thinks about his Dad. About how he'd managed to drive a wedge between him and Carol with the Finn faggot bomb. About how grey he looks sometimes. How sad. How hard he tries to be a good dad, a good employer, a good person. How hard it was for him, for them, when his mom died.
He can't hurt his dad like that. Can't make him the father of a murderer or a missing child, especially not both. "I vote we bury them too."
Blaine opens his mouth to protest, but nothing comes out. Instead he studies them, amber eyes intense. Finally he sighs, "I suppose I know when I'm beaten. Can we even move those things? They're literally blocks of ice."
There is a sudden sound of impact and they all turn their heads towards the direction it came from. Brittany stands in front of the broken ice statue of their deceased fellow delinquent with the metal pole he'd kicked out of their councilors hand. They watch, stupefied as Brittany lifts it again, grips it like a baseball bat and takes another swing. More of it shatters, as if he'd turned them to glass instead of ice.
"I thought we could get rid of them faster if we melted them." Brittany says when she notices their attention. She takes another swing, "But I didn't have a lighter and my mom won't let me use the hair dryer. Then I thought they might melt faster if they were little, like ice cubes. Those never last long."
"You froze them completely through." Blaine says, sounding awed. "We could probably flush the pieces instead of burying them and risk getting caught."
"Good idea little dude," Puck praises patting Blaine's shoulder.
Blaine's face became contrite, "I did not just suggest that. Those are people bodies, not goldfish. It's bad enough we aren't going to tell anyone what happened to them. The least we could do is actually bury them!"
"Too late," Santana says, uncompromising. "It's a good idea. Let me get a broom or something, we can probably pour some of it into the shower drain. I know the one in the girls bathroom doesn't even have a strainer for hair."
"We should clean up the blood I didn't freeze too." Kurt adds, "Clean up the mess we made and use lots of clorox. We don't want people to find any kind of DNA should this ever become a crime scene. Hand me your jumpsuits before you leave, I can get any kind of stain out."
"Nice team work Hummel." Puck says, tossing an arm around his shoulder, "Holly shit how are you so cold?"
"What?" Kurt asks, he feels fine.
Pucks hand felt like a brand when he puts it on Kurt's forehead."You're freezing. Like you got pneumonia or some shit."
Brittany stopped bashing the corpses to pieces long enough to touch his face."You feel like the other side of my pillow."
"Maybe that's why Santana's power doesn't work on you." Blaine says, "Since arousal means your body temperature gets higher and you stay cold."
"You did feel kind of chilly when I touched you." Santana says, shoots him one of those mean smirks she's locally famous for, "Now you're literally an ice queen."
Brittany laughs and resumes smashing the corpses into flushable pieces of ice.
Kurt knows it's completely inappropriate thought given their current situation. But he still rather desperately hopes he can still get an erection.