Helms kept glancing at Kirk as they walked to the engine platform. She finally spoke. "I apologize for interrupting your conversation, but I couldn't have used the communicator. She would have noticed."
Kirk mumbled his acceptance, but he got the feeling that she had some personal satisfaction from interrupting them. The captain was not the only womanizer aboard the ship, and Helms was probably a frequent target. No matter Kirk's actions, the most important lady in his life was the Enterprise.
Once they arrived at the platform, Kirk and Helms stood off to the side of a train coach and could overhear a conversation.
"—Why would a woman keep asking to see the captain? The Fat Controller isn't going to be here for an inspection until tomorrow, and she should already know that!"
It had to be Uhura!
Kirk, needing no more time to devise a plan, leapt up into the train coach. "Gentlemen—" There were three conductors in the standing area at the front of the coach. "A pleasure to meet you. Kirk, Jim Kirk." He quickly shook their hands. "And my assistant Miss Helms," who appeared behind him. They shook her hand as well. Kirk was glad that his suit and Helms's dress resembled the style of the conductors' clothes. His plan might work.
"The Controller sent me here just in time, it seems," Kirk began, using the title of their leader. "We are here, from a railroad off the island," he said accounting for his accent, "to assess the long-range radio capabilities on your train coaches." He amiably put his hand on one of the conductor's shoulders when he tried to get a word in, meeting his eyes. "If you'll just give us a few minutes, men, we'll go through a few tests."
Kirk nodded at Helms and they gestured the conductors from the cabin very gracefully and without objection. They looked slightly confused but did not appear to doubt Kirk's authority. After they were out the door, Kirk found the radio microphone. "This is Kirk to Enterprise," he said in a low voice. It surprisingly echoed through the whole coach since it was their announcement system..
"Enterprise to Kirk," Uhura's voice broadcasted, "Is everyone safe?"
"Yes, but we need our own communication restored, Lieutenant. This is a public announcement system."
"We're working to restore the line of communication and the transporter," she assured. "After you left, Captain, something unexplainable happened to all transmissions and the Enterprise itself seems very shaken and unreliable."
Kirk blinked slowly. Unreliable? It becomes unreliable after carrying them into deep space? These things don't happen by accident. "When you get all the transmissions back in order, have Scotty beam us up right away—that's an order."
"Aye, Captain."
"We are not in danger, but we don't want to remain stranded here if the ship should continue to be unreliable. Kirk out."
Kirk nodded to Helms and they left the cabin. Kirk looked to the now larger group of assembled conductors standing outside. "That'll be all, gentlemen. You shouldn't be getting any more strange calls, and our crew will be back with your upgrades in a few weeks." He mouthed "Let's go!" to Helms and they very purposefully walked away, feeling the railway staff looking after them.
Kirk checked in the direction of the conductors, and they were not being followed. "We need to regroup—"
"There, Captain!"
Spock, McCoy, and the security officer were stepping inside a train coach with the rest of the crowd.
"Spock?" Kirk questioned to himself. He just didn't look right walking onto a train. Kirk and Helms quickly maneuvered through the line to reach them. One child complained about them "cutting."
"McCoy wanted to ride the train, Captain," Spock informed.
"Don't you mean talking train, Spock?" McCoy countered. Spock looked at him pointedly. They all entered the coach and found a place where they could sit in the same area.
What are Spock and McCoy arguing about now? Kirk pondered. "Never mind that," Kirk interjected. "Everyone keep your communicators receptive. The Enterprise is trying to restore communication and transport function."
"Logically, we should not have landed before obtaining further analysis of the energy field. It had unforeseen effects," Spock noted.
"And logically," McCoy fussed, "trains don't talk!"
"The premise of this planet is illogical, therefore an animate train is not impossible, Doctor. Very similar to most of your comments toward me."
"Why you green-blooded—"
"Spock! Bones!" Jim couldn't think of how to restore contact with the Enterprise with those two arguing all the time. "Spock, explain the train."
"It is hard to explain, Captain. This locomotive that we are in has an animate face and speaks like Doctor McCoy."
McCoy was fuming, but Kirk firmly held the doctor's shoulder. "Why McCoy, Spock?" It was difficult to speak sternly when the topic of conversation was a talking train. Spock didn't lie or joke, so he had to be telling the truth.
"It was dismissive of all logic, Captain."
Kirk let out a light cough to disguise his laughter. "Well," he recovered, "What else?"
"When I scanned it, it had a similar reading to the strange energy around the planet. Further, I located a focused point of energy on the island that we will be taken to by this railway."
Kirk tensed his eyebrows brought his hand to his face to think. Energy in the talking train and a point of energy on the planet... The two could be related, but how was it affecting communication with the Enterprise? The energy wasn't supposed to be affecting anything. Spock was an excellent science officer, and Kirk trusted his skill to determine every effect of the energy field. But his data had not accounted for this. Behind Spock's emotionless exterior, he must be deeply unsettled by the unexpected outcomes. McCoy also trusted in Spock's logic, and fear of the unknown was likely the cause of his current quarrel with Spock.
"I don't know about these illogical talking trains, Jim," McCoy said quietly, "but if it helps us get back to the ship, I'll play along."
"Thank you, Doctor," Spock said, seemingly ignorant that the comment was not for him. But since he was Spock, he probably knew this perfectly well. In response, McCoy tightened his face and turned to look out the window.
The captain smirked at the comment, but regained his composure. "We'll investigate the train later, Spock, but I would like to know more about this planet's energy source."
Together, they examined Kirk's map of Sodor and found the corresponding location of the energy source. It was in a southern peninsula of the island, south of the Cabalnoo village. The captain noted that it was west of Kirk Ronan. The peninsula looked generally uninhabited, so they would not have to worry about using their technology.
The train soon began to move along the line. No one seemed to mind the bumping and grinding except for the Enterprise crew. They swayed back and forth and their shoulders bumped. The coach seat was not nearly as comfortable as the Captain's Chair, Kirk noted. Scotty would quit his job if the ship ran like this. The crew minded their own business, but they noticed that children would occasionally turn around to stare at them, especially stoic Spock. Kirk counted the minutes until they reached the next station.
Suddenly, and at the smoothest part of the ride, all five of their communicators began to hum and whistle with steadily increasing volume. Every passenger turned and stared in their direction. Kirk quickly began speaking into his communicator to try to contact the ship. No voice replied, but the noise level still increased.
"Analysis, Mr. Spock!" Kirk yelled over the now shrieking communicator.
"Interference directly from the Enterprise," Spock replied while holding his ears.
Children were beginning to cry and their parents were grumbling and standing from their seats.
"Shut them down!" Kirk ordered, the sound still rising in pitch and shrillness.
As they turned off their communicators, the train began squealing to a stop. They were not at a station. More angry passengers stood up and began to walk toward the Enterprise crew, thinking they stopped the train. A conductor quickly ran inside the coach.
"Sorry about the emergency stop, folks! Our radios have gone haywire and our train can't handle it—"
"It's those people!" an angry male passenger yelled, pointing at Kirk. Kirk glared at him and sat down in his seat. His ears were still ringing from the loud communicators.
"No, it's— Wait!" The conductor stopped, walking towards the crew, looking at the captain. "You're Kirk! You fixed the radio the last time!"
The captain could feel McCoy's and all the passengers' eyes burning into him. Maybe he could fix it again, but he wanted Spock's help. He opened his mouth to ask him, but a roar erupted across the coach, sending everyone cowering to the floor with their ears covered. Even the train itself shuddered at the sound. It was coming from the intercom speakers, and a few of them exploded from the strain. Gradually it transformed from a technological roar and sounded like an anguished wail. It was a sickening sound and filled everyone with primordial fear.
"It is from the Enterprise, Captain!" Spock yelled.
Didn't they realize what they were doing? Kirk towered to his full height against the sound. Pained and furious, he yelled into the air, "Stop using this intercom, Lieutenant!"
At the sound of his voice, all sound on the coach was silenced, including the moaning passengers. The conductor shakily gave the intercom microphone to Captain Kirk.
"Lieutenant!" he yelled, his voice being broadcast across the train. Static. Kirk gritted his teeth. "Respond!"
Again, not a sound. But it responded to his voice earlier. It was almost like something was keeping him from being able to communicate. The talking trains?
"I don't know what you are," Kirk said quickly, "But you will," he stressed, "allow my ship to speak to me." It was a far fetched idea that something could actually be controlling the ship, but something had to be done.
A voice immediately began to appear through the static. "—not causing this Captain, it's—"
"CAPTAIN!" a woman suddenly screamed through every speaker on the train, sending everyone cowering. "COME BACK TO ME!" Every speaker popped and the coach was quiet.
Kirk grimaced and tossed the speaker back to the conductor. "We need to get off this train now," he ordered his crew.
"That was not Lieutenant Uhura, Captain," Spock added, standing by the door.
"I know, Spock. I don't know who it was, but we need to get back on that ship, and we're going to find out how." With that remark, he jumped out of the coach, followed by the rest of the crew.
The passengers were largely immobile with confusion. Spock began to approach the door when a human child got his attention.
"Mister!" she whispered.
Spock looked closely at the emotionally distraught child. She had tears in her eyes.
"Who was that lady?"
Spock thought for a moment since there were increasing amounts of eyes on him. "A talking train, naturally," he answered. "She wishes that her driver would return." With that, Spock hopped from the coach after the crew.
He found them farther up the track gazing up, mouths open, at the large blue tender locomotive, who was giving them a sound verbal lashing.
"You wanted to throw my express off the rails? Pah! This will show you!" he said pompously.
Spock walked up behind Dr. McCoy. "Doctor McCoy, it is highly illogical for you especially to be quiet during an argument." McCoy visibly tensed up. "Surely you have a witty remark," Spock continued as they all turned around, "that you would, metaphorically speaking, put down its smoke-stack."
Kirk rested a hand on Spock's shoulder as he passed by, and McCoy could only glare—never admitting that Spock was right about the animate trains.
The crew quietly walked beside the track in the direction of the focused point of energy. They needed no words to express their concerns about returning to the Enterprise from this mysterious place.