Touhou's react to DEATH BATTLE

by memoyolo14

Marisa found a box in her house with something from the outside world and since she doesn't have anything better to do, she'll check whatever it is with reimu and whoever else decide's to come along. (it's stops looking like a script in chapter 7)

4. Femefatale the first edition

This took way too long, and it will be like that for this fanfiction since this one is not my main project.

I'll still update it, just going to do it slowly.

(Death Battle belongs to Screw Atack and Touhou project belongs to ZUN ).

WONDER WOMAN VS ROGUE

Two weeks have passed since the now dubbed "embodiment of the scarlet devil" incident resolved by reimu and marisa.

Marisa was pretty anoyed that she had to deal with that right when she was getting pumped for the death battle show.

She would have gone with reimu and keep watching it but in the incident she meet patchouli knowledge and her enormous library wich she has been borrowing from time to time to implement a multi-elemen master spark.

Know she is going with the box of death battle to the escarlet devil mansion or SDM, reimilia announced that she was gonna do a party this night and marisa couldn't find a better moment for showing the death battle thing to one of her friends in the SDM.

Said friends being flandre scarlet and surpringly hong-meiling, flandre was a good kid but she was pretty destructive, and she became friends with meiling thanks to flandre since both reimu and remilia let them deal with flandre when she losses it.

She was already here so she landed and saluted the gatekeeper.

Marisa:"sup mei, how have you been?"

Meiling notices her and smiles brightly.

Meiling:"oh!, marisa i'm doing fine, and you?"

Marisa:"meh, same as ever you know patchouli angry for the books and shit like that"

Meiling smirked at that, she was the gatekeeper but marisa only came to bug patchuoli something she was okay with, why? because patchouli always let's her deal with flandre alone, heck no one except koakuma and rarelly sakuya helped her with flandre.

Wich made her relasionships with the people from the SDM a little all over the place, patchouli thinks of her as lazy but in reality she just lets marisa pass so easily because meiling doesn't like her, koakuma is a good friend, flandre calls her big sis (something that remilia hates), sakuya is alway liking remilias heels and remilia herself liked her before but then flandre started calling meiling big sis literally replacing remilia from big sis to just sister.

Wow what a fuckfest.

Meiling:"what is in that box?"

Marisa smiled and just told her.

Marisa:"it's a surprise, so is everyone here or what?"

Meiling nodded.

Meiling:"yes, including cirno, daiyousei and rumia everyone should be here"

Marisa:"nice!, well let's go inside mei time to start this party!"

Meiling:"well i would bu-"

Marisa interrups her by grabing her hand and trying to pull her she fails miserably.

Meiling is atleas as strong as an oni what did she expect?.

Marisa:"come oooonnnnn!"

Meiling sighs and just goes along with marisa, because why the heck not?.

Once they entered through the gate they went inside the mansion to the dinning hald where everyone is eating, drinking or talking.

Flandre notices them and smiles like a child in a candy store.

Flandre:"marisa, big sis!!!"

They heard something crack probably the glass of whine of remilia, yeah she wants her status as big sis back.

Then it was remplased instantly most likely sakuya's doing

Reimu just nods their way and starts eating more fancy food, eating rice almost every day get's tiring.

And patchouli who was talking with alice hit's her head at the table probably because marisa is here.

The three most childish cirno, daiyousei and rumia looking start greeting and hugging meiling, if it's not obvious meiling is popular with children.

Koakuma waves at them and starts bandaging patchouli's head, because her body is ridicously weak.

Flandre gets close then notices the box.

Flandre:"marisa, What's in the box?"

This made alice and reimu to glance at marisa, both wondering why would she bring those here but decided that it wasn't that she probably just did it because she could.

Alice:"ah so you bringued those...what where they called?...oh right CD's"

Patchouli:"CD's?, so where did she steal them from?"

As you can see patchouli doesn't think highly of marisa.

Marisa:"nah, they just apeared on my home and we just watched them with the television that came with it, thesse things are surprisingly entretainnig"

Remilias:"entretaining how"

Marisa had gotten remilia attention, she got pretty interested about this CD's.

Flandre was looking at one of them and saw the name of the show.

Flandre:"death battle?, sound fun! sister can we watch it?!"

Remila twiched thinking to herself on how to get her status as "big sis" back, but also agreeing with flandre to watch "death battle".

Remilia:"Sakuya"

Said person just appears, even though everyone knows that she stoped time to get there to make it look cooler.

Sakuya:"yes mistress?"

Remilia:"prepare a comfortable room for us to watch this"

Sakuya gave a curt nod all professional and shit and dissapeared again... then came back.

Sakuya:"it is done"

Marisa was cursing that fucking life hack that was time stop (A/N: does she actually stop time?, i pretty sure i heard somewhere that she just accelerated her time or something).

Flandre, rumia and cirno where already celebrating in excitement.

Marisa:"this is gonna get good!"

/GIRLS ARE GETTING READY/

They all entered a big room, two big red couches, three small chairs and two thrones those last probably for the scarlet sisters.

Marisa opened the box in the ground ready to put them we're they could watch it comfortably.

Then it magically apeared in front of the couches.

Marisa:"... fucking time stop..."

Everyone got in their seats, in one couch we're marisa, meiling, reimu and koakuma, in the other one sakuya, patchouli, reimu and alice the chairs we're for the members of the recently made team of cirno, daiyousei and rumia and in the thrones the scarlet sisters.

Flandre:" come on!, start it already!.

Marisa just shook her head at fandres entusiasm, she was about to go and do that, and AGAIN it started magically.

Now marisa was glaring at sakuya so hard almost trying to destroy her with her eyes.

(*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*)

Wiz: Superheroines. Millions have been drawn to these modern myths of comic book lore.

Boomstick: Or you could, uh, just be drawn to the way they're drawn.

Meiling:"what a way to start this off"

Alice:"you have no idea, what you're in for"

Wiz: Like Anna Marie, the Rogue

In the screen a brown and white haired woman with yellow and green spandex and a green jacket appers flying.

Boomstick: And Diana Prince, the Wonder Woman.

Then a black haired woman with a tiara, a really revealing red spandex,that makes her look a little too much like a stripper.

Wiz: He's Boomstick and I'm Wizard.

Boomstick: And we're here to watch two chicks duke it out! CATFIGHT!.

Koakuma:"so... he is just the crazy-pervert guy?"

Reimu:"pretty much, but gotta give it to him, he can be funny..."

Wiz: It's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills-

Boomstick: And maybe a few other things.

Reimu:"when he isn't checking out other woman"

Wiz: -to find out who would win... a Death Battle.

Flandre:"yes!, start already!"

(*Cues: X-Men (2000) - The X-Jet )

POWER ABSORPTION

- activated through contact

- absorbs memories, talents, personalities, and abilities

- temporary transfer

- can use copied abilities

- can be lethal with prolonged combat

Wiz: Rogue has possessed a variety of different powers over the years. For this duel in particular, we will use the most well known version; the original iteration from the comics and television show. Her deadliest weapon is her own skin. With just a touch, she absorbs a person's memories, talents, personalities, and abilities, whether superhuman or not, to use them herself.

Meiling:"so...bad touch"

Marisa:"and not in a sexual way, neat"

Marisa and meiling did a high-five, making sakuya eyebrow to twitch a little, she new of marisa and meiling friendship and she honestly didn't like it, she was sure most of the time that marisa got into the mansion just because meiling let's her in.

Boomstick: Too bad it knocks them out cold. And if she holds on long enough, it's game over.

Patchouli:"her skin is parasytic in nature, that explains her gauntlets, not only that shesteal power and energy, definetly a dangerous power"

Flandre:"only you will look at the boring stuff"

Patchouli:"i prefeer to call it informational stuff"

Wiz: Tenacious foes like Juggernaut can resist it, but in the end, nobody is safe from Rogue's parasitic touch.

cirno:"why is that guy so big!?, what training did he take!?, what kind of juice did he drink!?"

Diayousei:"cirno calm down, he was probably born like that"

Wiz: For every second of contact, Rogue can keep these powers for a full minute. Though sometimes, there's unforeseen side effects.

Reimu:"like?..."

(*Cues: X-Men Theme - Hard Rock Remix*)

MS. MARVEL POWERS

- super strength

- flight at subsonic speed

- near-invulnerability

- enchanced reflexes

- telepathic resistance

- seventh sense

Boomstick: She held on to Ms. Marvel for so long she absorbed her powers permanently. Now, she's got super strength, speed, and near invulnerability. Not that I blame her, though. I'd be holdin' on to Ms. Marvel for as long as I could! Plus, then when she's unconscious I could...

Reimu:"if she holds to someone a lot she gets permanent power, also boomstick that's fucked up"

Unfourtonatetly, flandre, cirno and rumia didn't get what boomstick said and they of ourse had to ask about it.

Here is a thing about youkai, even if they are older than they look like, that doesn't mean they'll act that age, flandre and remilia being a prime example of that.

Flandre:"what is he gonna do to her when-?"

Koakuma:"Things!"

Cirno:"what kind of th-?"

Alice:"normal things!"

Rumia:"Is he going to eat he-"

Marisa:"i a wa-no i mean mayb-ummm!, who knows!?"

Reimu:"damnit marisa..."

Wiz: She also gained a seventh sense, the ability to unconsciously predict her opponents' moves.

Koakuma:"kinda how meiling, can sense the Qi around her"

Meiling:"no, it's more like the mistress is able to see possible fates"

Reimilia, sputered losing all her composure in only a second.

Reimilia:"i have already told you that i control-"

Reimu:"then why did we win?"

In that moment remilia knew of the true meaning of humiliation, she slumped on her chair, with sakuya trying to reasure her mistress, and sometimes sending meiling a smal glare, meiling just scracthed the back of her head nerviously, while koakuma shook her head while smiling, patchouli just sighed in exasperation at the scene.

Boomstick: But her seventh sense doesn't seem to always work. That or the writers just forgot about it 'cause, uh, Rogue gets her ass kicked a lot.

Patchouli:"what a usseless abilty to have then"

Marisa:"like your punches"

Patchouli:"mmmmmuuuukyyyyuuuu!!!"

She threw her book at marisa, it didn't even reach three feet before failing to the ground.

Koakuma:"i'll... just grab it"

Wiz: For plot convenience.

Alice:"sounds more like bad writing to me"

Boomstick: And damn, she's got a hot ass.

Meiling:"uuuuuhh... what?"

Reimu:"just ignore him, it's better that way"

Cirno:"why is her ass hot?, should i-"

Daiyousei:"no cirno no need to cool it"

Remilia:"...what?"

Wiz: What?

Marisa:"was that an echo?"

Boomstick: Hey, that counts as a superpower in my book, Wiz! But while she's not invincible, she doesn't have any real weaknesses either. She's a classy southern belle, who I'd like to take out to dinner.

Reimilia:"that'll never happen"

Sakuya:"Obviously"

Wiz: Who can fly, lift buildings, and kill people just by touching them.

Boomstick: Never mind.

Marisa:"pussy"

Rogue: Ain't that enough?

(*Cues: Wonder Woman (2009) - Ending Theme*)

Wiz: To the uneducated nerd, Wonder Woman may seem a cheap clone of Superman.

Remilia:"who?"

Boomstick: With Superboobies

Sakuya:"why does he exist?"

Alice:"because shows of this type always need a funny guy"

Wiz: But in reality, she's a whole different story. Created from earth, born by gods, trained by ancient warriors-

Reimu:"born by gods but created by earth?, how just how?"

Remilia:"some people just have it easy"

Everyone was looking at her.

Remilia:"i never said lfe was hard for me"

At least she is honest about it.

Boomstick: Maker of Wonder Bread! Designer of the Wonderbra!

That got a laugh out of everyone.

Marisa:"pppppppfffftttt...hahahahahah!"

Koakuma:"hehehehe!, okay he can be funny"

Remilia:"hihihihi that was pretty good"

Flandre:"see marisa?, i told tou my sister laughed like a school girl"

Remilia:"oh shut up you"

Wiz: Boomstick, that's not true!

Meiling:"but it was funny as hell!"

Boomstick: See, I can do it too Wiz!

Alice:"do what?, a dumbass out of yourself?"

Cirno:"i think i should be offended by that..."

Rumia:"it's cause you're stupid"

Cirno:"yea-, Hey!"

Wiz: Wonder Woman is the incredibly powerful and near invincible ambassador of Themyscira, and self-appointed protector of the Earth.

Patchouli:"i think i read of a place with that name before..."

Koakuma:"i think it was of greck mythology"

Boomstick: And she dresses like a stripper. A patriotic stripper!

Meiling:"i mean... he's not wrong"

Marisa:"aren't you showing your lega most of the time?"

Meiling:"that's different and you know it"

Flandre:"what's a stripper?"

Marisa and Meiling:"nothing important"

Flandre:"like my sister?"

...damn.

Remilia was sulking in her chair again, sakuya didn't know what to do about the situation.

MASTER COMBATANT

- trained since childhood

- skilled at armed and unarmed combat

- prefers fists over blades

- the best of the amazons

Wiz: Diana Prince has been trained by the Amazons as a master combatant since childhood. She dueled the best of the best for the right to be crowned Wonder Woman.

POWERS FROM DEMETER

- superhuman strength

- super human durability (resists all but blades and bullets)

- magic resistence

- enchanced healing factor

Wiz: Her unearthly powers are divine, granted by ancient Greek gods and goddesses. From Demeter, she received superhuman strength and durability.

Marisa:"Blessed by the gods to be strong, sounds familiar"

Marisa and everyone else was looking at reimu.

Reimu:"It's not the same"

Rumia:"true atleast wonder woman meet said gods, you don't even know who you are praying to"

Reimu:"that's... ouch, that one hurt"

Koakuma:"both flandre and rumia are very blunt people"

(*Cues: Justice League - Main Theme*)

POWERS FROM HERMES

- flight up to mach-5 speed

- superhuman reflexes (faser than superman)

- super human speed (up to hyper-sonic)

Boomstick: 'And you know that bitch Mailman god with the wingy shoes?

Wiz: Hermes?

Boomstick: Whatever. He gave Wonder Woman the ability to fly and move at hypersonic speed.

Marisa:"a mailman god grants you incredible speed... that sounds really stupid"

OTHER POWERS

- they don't really matter so not even going to bother with them

Wiz: She was given numerous other powers from enhanced senses, animal rapport, and blessings of wisdom and empathy.

Reimu:"why so many?"

Rumia:"cause unlike you she is loved by the gods"

Meiling:"rumia, stop antagonazing reimu"

Rumia:"i'm just saying the truth"

Reimu had this gloomy expression in her face, she was pretty much told her truths by a human eating youkai, what has life become?.

Boomstick: Aside from the obvious cannons rested right below her neck.

Paychouli:"he has nothing else in his brain, does he?"

Marisa:"pretty much, at least the guy is funny"

LASSO OF TRUTH

- forged by hapheastus

- unbreakable

- infinitely elastic

- forces prisoners to tell the truth

Boomstick: she's got a pretty bizarre mix of weaponry. Her Lasso of Truth is a piece of unbreakable string that, well, makes you tell the truth.

Flandre:"i wish i ahd it, i'll put it in my sister and make her tel me if she eated my flan!!!"

Remilia:"i didn't!, you just want to balme so i buy you more out of guilt!"

Flandre:"you?, i though you sended sakuya to get it you lazy baby!!"

Remilia:"baby?, aren't you the one that has to get help from meiling when you don't want to eat something!!!?"

Almost everyone was looking at the scene of sisterly... love?, all of them a little uncomfourtable.

Except for patchouli who was staring straight at the television consntantly thinking, "let them fight for it patchouli, just let them get it out of their system", yeah she was the one wo eated the flan.

Hippolyta: What other depraved thoughts must you be thinking?

Col. Steve Trevor: God, your daughter's got a nice rack.

Sakuya:"seems like a waste to use that lasso just to find, the perverted thoughs"

Meiling had a shit-eating smile on her face.

Meiling:"perverted thoughs?, that makes me remember you when you were little, you were always star-"

She didn't get to finish because sakuya, apeared behind her covering meiling's mouth.

Sakuya:"i'm not like that anymore!"

Reimu, marisa and alice, were surprissed to see sakuya lossing her composure so easilly.

Boomstick: Hell yeah, she does!

Koakuma:"i mean... yes she does"

Patchouli:"please don't go back to your succubi tendencies, it was hard to dealt with you the first days"

Koakuma:"i said i was sorry..."

BOOMERANG TIARA

- returns after each use

- razor-sharp edge

- can cut through most substances

Wiz: She uses her tiara as a long range throwing weapon, using its razor sharp edge to slice open her enemies' throat.

Marisa:"why a tiara?, couldn't she get like an edged boomerang or something?"

Reimu:"because she felt like it, i guess"

BRACELETS OF SUBMISSION

- indestructible

- formed from the aegis of zeus

- blocks blades, bullets, beams and other attacks

- can discharge lightning

Boomstick: Wonder Babe here uses the Bracelets of Submission, indestructible steel gauntlets forged from the remains of Zeus' legendary Aegis. These babies can block all sorts of attacks.

Meiling:"the times that would have save mw the pain..."

Marisa:"hey, i didn't master spark you to hell, so stop lookng at me"

Reimu:"i already said i was sorry, for starting with fantasy seal..."

Meiling:"are you reimu?, are you?"

Wiz: She has persevered throughout the years, fighting a huge variety of foes, even killing the Greek God of War, Ares.

Remilia:"so she killed a god no biggie"

Flandre:"what do you mean by no biggie!?, that's awesome!"

Remilia:"sarcasam flandre!"

Boomstick: Hear that, Kratos? A chick beat you to it!

Marisa:"who?"

Alice:"no idea"

Cirno:"no matter what those two do!, i'm still the-"

Everyone (except daiyousei):strongest, we know"

Cirno was now in fetal possition, in her chair.

Cirno:"didn't even let me finish my thing..."

Daiyousei:"calm down cirno"

Wonder Woman bashed the edge of the shield down to Mad Harriet.

Wonder Woman: Let's see you smile now!

Marisa:"savage!"

Patchouli:"well as i see it, this fight will be decided on wether wonder woman is touched by rogue or not"

Meiling:"then rogue has this then"

Marisa:"what are you talking about?, wonder woman has rogue outclassed"

Alice:"hate to agree, with marisa but rogue is just no match for wonder woman"

Koakuma:"yeah but, wonder woman just needs to fail once and it' game over"

Flandre:"i don't care just destroy each other already!"

Remilia:"i really don't care who wins, but i'll say wonder woman she just has the adventage in almost every way"

Sakuya:"then i'll go for wonder woman too"

Rumia:"sakuya is a kiss ass"

Sakuya:"...shut up"

Cirno:"wonder woman wins, she is stronger"

Daiyousei:"i don't think that's how this is decided cirno..."

Reimu:"rogue is probably going to win, just if wonder woman screws up, and yes rumia sakuya is a kiss ass"

(*Cues: Rogue's Theme - X-Men vs Street Fighter*)

Rogue is shown flying in the sky. The Invisible Jet descends in background and Wonder Woman flies out. She kicks Rogue in the face, and both superheroines fly down to the ground.

Meiling:"i understand rogue's pain, just flying around attacked out of nowhere..."

Reimu:"just let it go already!!"

Meiling:"never!"

FIGHT!

(*Cues: Wonder Woman (2009) - The Battle/Origins*)

Wonder Woman throws her tiara at Rogue, runs behind her, and roundhouse kicks her. The kick sends Rogue flying, Wonder Woman then flies after her, kicking her multiple times before dashing behind her again and punching her.

Marisa:"see meiling?, wonder woman has more power and expirience, rogue already lost this"

Meiling:"Just wait, she will turn this around..."

She grabs a dazed Rogue with the Lasso of Truth and slams her on the ground numerous times, drags Rogue near her, and uppercuts her in the air. She darts around the airborne Rogue with a flurry of punches.

Remilia:"...yeah i can see how she is going to win"

Meiling:"Okay, that doesn't help my case, but you just have to wait a little more"

Koakuma"she is getting destroyed..."

Cirno:"you see?, she wins cause she is stronger"

(*Cues: X-Men Theme - Hard Rock Remix )

When she punches Rogue in the face however, she absorbs some of Wonder Woman's powers, she absorbs more of her powers when she takes off her glove and touches her leg.

Meiling:"hey marisa do you hear that ringing?"

Marisa:"i don't..."

Meiling:"because i freaking called it!"

Remilia:"goddamnit wonder woman"

Patchouli:"and just like that it's over"

Reimu:"she commited that mistake way sooner then i was expecting"

While Wonder Woman breaks free, Rogue strikes her from behind, elbows her in the neck, and sends her soaring with a quick kick combo. Wonder Woman throws out her Lasso of truth again, but Rogue grabs it, tugs it, and slams her on the ground.

Flandre:"yes violence!, Punch her more in the face"

Marisa was staring at meiling, no emotion just a stare.

Meiling:"yes i'm still working on her violent tendencies"

Alice:"doesn't seem like it"

Meiling got pretty anoyed at that.

Meiling:"Wanna do it for me?"

Alice:"no, no you are doing a good work"

Rogue flies behind her again and launches her tiara again, but Rogue blocks it, -propelling it back on her head- kicks her in the air and uppercuts her. Wonder Woman stops Rogue with several punches, but her finishing kick is blocked and she is knocked in the air.

Koakuma:"so rogue is going to win"

Marisa:it's not over yet!, i think..."

(*Cues: Wonder Woman (2009) - The Battle/Origins again*)

Rogue flies after her in the air, and is responded by a commotion of punches, Rogue blocks on of them and delivers some of her own, which is later returned back by Wonder Woman. She is then knocked down to the ground by a dive kick delivered by Wonder Woman. Both combatants fly down to the ground. Woman Woman dashes towards her with a flying kick, but it is interrupted by Rogue, who grabs her.

Koakuma knew what rogue was doing, and she was going to love it.

So does meiling and marisa as they get umeiling rushes at flandre and cover her eyes and marisa does the same with cirno and rumia, daiyousei had already closed her eyes.

Flandre:"big sis!, why!?"

Meiling:"no reason!"

Cirno:"wha!?"

Rumia"is something hapening?"

Marisa didn't know how a human eating midget, could be so innocent.

Rogue: Good night, sugar!

Rogue proceeds to plant a kiss of death upon Wonder Woman's lips, killing her.

Reimu:"that... was so unnecesary"

Patchouli:"why?, why did she do this?"

Koakuma:"BECAUSE IT WAS HOT!!"

Patchouli:"koakuma!"

Koakuma:"i couldn't supress it forever!!!"

Sakuya:"what is even happening anymore?..."

Meiling and marisa go back to their seats, while cirno, rumia and flandre try to figure out what just happen.

K.O.!

Rogue then strikes a pose.

(*Cues: X-Men (2000) - Main Theme*)

Boomstick: Woo-hoo-hoo! This goes down in history as the best DEATH BATTLE! ever!

Marisa:"just tell us why rogue won!!!"

Alice:"someone's angry"

Wiz: Poor Wonder Woman was more than a match for Rogue, but then she touched Rogue's face.

Remilia:"why did that happen anyway?"

Boomstick: Wonder Woman is a trained fighter, so naturally she would strike her opponent's weakest spots, like the neck, stomach, joints and, well, the face.

Remilia:"...fair enough"

Wiz: In the end, her failure was a result of her thorough Amazonian training.

Boomstick: And her stripper outfit! Her leg was just begging the be grabbed there. Though personally, uh, I might have grabbed elsewhere.

Patchouli:"koakuma no"

Koakuma:"koakuma yes"

Meiling slaps the back of her head.

Meiling:"no, bad succubi, bad"

Wiz: Wonder Woman's powers may be godly, but Rogue's taken similar powers before, so there's no reason to say she couldn't here. Adding Wonder Woman's strength and speed to Rogue's own power gave her a huge advantage, drastically turning the tide.

Reimu:"so she can steal the power of gods... why not?"

Boomstick: A few high flying combos and our favorite X-Girl had Wonder Woman on the ropes.

Wiz: And with her combined reflexes, speed, and seventh sense, she outmaneuvered Wonder Woman with one fatal kiss.

Koakuma:" god so hot..."

Meiling:"koakuma..."

Koakuma:"yeah, yeah i'll let it go"

Boomstick: Rogue sure "made out" in this fight!

Sakuya:"that joke, just killed me a little inside

Wiz: The winner is Rogue.

Boomstick: Next time on death battle.

A walking mushroom and a turtles are shown... yeah those are the next fighters.

Marisa:"so... next episode?"

Remilia:"yeah, why not?"

Flandre:"yeah! mindless animal violence!"

WONDER WOMAN VS ROGUE END

Well next they'll see a turtle and a mushroom beat the shit out of each other.

Just another normal day in gensokyo.

See you in the next chapter.