*Many thanks to sendtherain for beta'ing.

*I own nothing. No copyright infringement intended.

...

Chapter 9 -

Caitlin found him brooding in the cortex at three a.m. Stifling a sigh, she approached him. He didn't look up at her, but she knew he knew she was there. She was impossible to miss, even without the sound of clacking heels to announce her entrance.

She stood patiently in front of him and waited.

He didn't say anything; just continued to pout and move his fingers up and down the pencil his hands held in mid-air. His eyes were dead set on something in the distance, but nothing was there.

Finally, she rounded the table and took a seat beside him, crossing one knee over the other.

It was another full minute before he opened his mouth to speak.

"It's late."

She pursed her lips. "Mhmm."

"You should be at home sleeping."

"Some people are still out celebrating."

He glanced over at her, half-confused, half-exasperated, and entirely unamused.

"The holiday?" she reminded.

"Right. The holiday." Not a dawning revelation; a painful reminder. "Another holiday completely destroyed because Barry and Iris' break-up was at the center of it."

He whipped the pencil across the room and stood to his feet, clenching his hands in his hair.

She sighed. "Cisco…"

"I had it," he continued, still tense. "I thought I had it, at least." His hands fell to his sides as his voice lowered sadly. "Get them in the same space, have them dressed all snazzy, neither expecting the other …" He turned to face her. "It always seems to work so well in the movies."

She smiled sadly. "But this isn't the movies, Cisco." She walked to his side and rubbed her hand up and down his arm. "This is real life. Barry and Iris are real people."

"You think I should've left well enough alone? That I just should've been grateful Barry decided to come back to STAR Labs?"

She shrugged. "You meant well. And hey, it was good that for one night they weren't avoiding each other. They were facing each other."

"Facing each other in a screaming match," he grumbled.

"I wouldn't call it a screaming match," she said delicately.

"Cait, we could hear from the stairwell a floor down from the roof," he spat, frustrated. Caitlin held her tongue. "At Joe's Christmas party, Barry was missing and Iris was sad as hell. I try to play matchmaker on the next big holiday, and it blows up in our face. Why can't I just-"

"Hey, hey." She came to stand in front of him, locking her hands on his wrists that were swinging up in his rejuvenated frustration. "I was in on this too, don't forget. We're a team, Cisco. Sure, you wanted to get Barry and Iris back together, but I signed up to it. I helped you formulate a plan. I stood by you. And how they reacted tonight? That is not your fault. If they were here, they'd be telling you the exact same thing."

"But they're not here, are they?" he fumed.

She sighed and pulled him in for a hug. He didn't resist.

"Oh, Cisco…"

He deflated and relaxed into her hold, eventually wrapping his arms around her the same she was around him.

"I couldn't even keep the party going," he mumbled.

"It was just you, me and HR, Cisco. Wally and Joe hadn't shown up yet, and HR was being…"

"-HR," they both said simultaneously. Caitlin smiled a little.

"We tried, but-"

"I guess we got lucky that Jesse showed up wanting to take Wally to her earth for New Year's…"

"And that Joe wasn't in the partying mood with none of his kids present."

She met his eyes, a dead-set glare in her direction. Her shoulders slumped.

"It's not your fault, Cisco."

He nodded and walked back to the chair he'd vacated.

"Maybe…maybe not."

She looked down at him, wishing she could cheer him up somehow.

"What do we do now?" He looked up at her hopefully. "I mean…is Barry going to come back during the week? Will Iris? Ever? I feel like…" He looked down at his hands, absently playing with each other.

She came to sit beside him again.

"I don't know, Cisco," she said. "But it's only been a few hours. Why don't you give it a full twenty-four before you drown yourself in despair, huh?"

He looked up at her, his lips twitching but still not able to form a smile.

"I have wine at my place if you want to sleep over," she teased.

He laughed. "We have champagne here."

"Bring it!" She jumped to her feet. "We can use all the alcohol we can get."

His brows furrowed, amused, as he joined her.

"Why? So we can have a massive hangover in the morning?"

"Nooo." She grabbed his hand, snatched the full champagne bottle sitting all by its lonesome across the room and dragged him out of the room towards the elevator. "So we can forget this disastrous night even happened and remember better times."

He followed her into the elevator. "Times when Barry and Iris were together?" he ventured.

"Times when it was just you and I," she corrected. "When Ronnie couldn't hang out for whatever reason, it was just us two and we stayed out at the bar, then grabbed ice cream before I got too drunk and wound up at my place playing Monopoly some movie neither of us were paying attention to because we were laughing too hard."

"I laughed so I wouldn't cry," he informed her.

She chuckled. "Why would you cry?"

"Because you cheated at every board game we played and always mocked my favorite lines in the movies."

She blinked. "Why'd you keep going out with me if I frustrated you so much then?" she asked, playing it off as curiously incredulous as she stifled the slight hurt cropping up.

He shrugged, pretending he didn't notice.

"Because I liked you."

She blinked, unsure how to take that.

He bumped her shoulder with his and then pressed the elevator button to go down.

"I still like you."

Warmth spread through her, the prickle of ice receding into the depths of her body, and she smiled.

"Even though I cheated?"

"Only when you're drunk," he informed her. "When you're sober you're a stickler for the rules. It's kinda funny actually."

She smacked him lightly but couldn't help but smile.

"I take it we're not playing a board game tonight then?"

"Or watching a movie," he assured.

She laughed. "What are we doing then?"

"Drinking and sleeping. Period."

"What about popcorn?"

His eyes lit up and then fixed on hers. "You still have some?"

"I always keep an extra stash for you, Cisco," she said, walking out of the elevator when the doors opened.

"Aww, Cait, I'm touched."

She rolled her eyes.

"Don't flatter yourself. I have to buy extra because you eat it all before I get to it."

He was quiet for a beat, then, "Yes to popcorn."

She smiled, then stopped at her car and looked over at him.

"Why don't you go grab some clothes from your place and meet me? I'll have the alcohol and popcorn all ready for you." She winked.

He grinned and then his parted lips slowly lessened.

"Hey, Caitlin."

"Yeah, Cisco?" she asked, halting before she closed the car door.

"Thanks. The night doesn't feel like a total waste anymore."

She smiled softly. "You're my best friend. It's my job to make you feel awesome."

He laughed, nodded, and saluted before she started her car and drove off.

"Mission accomplished."

…

Iris went straight to her office and shut the door as soon as she had deposited the doctor's slip on Scott's desk and assured him she had a clean bill of health. He'd eyed the slip of paper skeptically, and she'd been half-tempted to tell him it'd all been a scam to get out of work. But he was her boss, and he probably wouldn't take kindly to that – or getting freaked out that she might be contagious when she actually wasn't. Regardless, her very healthy – if tired – appearance must've convinced him. He nodded his thanks, gave her first choice of the assignments for the week and then waved her out.

She did absolutely nothing for the next two hours. Well, she drank coffee. And she stared at her empty computer screen. But no brain activity happened, and no physical movement except for turning on her computer and slipping out of her heels. She sighed a few times, propped her chin on her hand and lost herself in the designs on her pen and the many empty lines on her notepad.

Truly, the only reason she didn't call in sick another day was because at home she'd sleep the whole day away. At least here at some point she would have to be forced to work.

Apparently though, she would be forced to talk first.

A light knock on the door. She didn't look up.

"I'm busy," she drawled, twirling the unused pen between her fingers.

The door opened slowly, and she repressed a sigh.

"I come in peace," the voice said hesitantly.

Iris looked up and forced a thin smile.

"Hey, Linda."

"Hey, I-" She halted when she saw the three empty coffee cups littering her desk. "You look really tired for someone who should be jacked up on caffeine." She set the fourth cup in front of her.

"I got decaf."

Linda's eyes widened.

"I know. It's like I'm trying not to be alert." She took a sip of the new beverage and smiled contentedly as the warm liquid traveled down her throat.

"Good?"

"Great." She sat down the cup. "As was your doctor's note for Scott. Thanks for that, by the way." She threw the empty cups in the tiny trash bin under her desk.

"Any time." Linda pulled a chair over and sat down in it. She licked her lips, trying to think of the perfect words to say as she watched her best friend idly play with the pen in her hand again before quietly sipping her drink. "Iris, I just wanted to say I am so-"

"It's not your fault, Lin. You were trying to help, and I was on board with it. You did nothing wrong."

"But if I hadn't called-"

"We would've woken up together the next morning, got into a fight over breakfast, and he likely would've stormed out. At least this way we were open and honest with each other and ended things peacefully."

"After he came by last night, you mean?"

She nodded and took another sip of her caffeinated drink.

"Yeah, after that."

Linda sank back in her chair, thinking.

"So, what now?"

Iris shrugged. "Now I get back to work."

"I mean, with-"

"I know what you meant, Lin." She sighed. "Truthfully, I don't know. It hasn't even been a day. Maybe I'll go back to STAR Labs eventually. Maybe I won't. As much as I like Cisco and Caitlin…heck, even HR sometimes, they're more Barry's friends than they are mine. If I just focus on work and stick to you like glue, maybe I can get through this."

"Well, you definitely have me," she assured. "And not just for getting drunk on the weekends."

Iris laughed. "Or after work every day too, right?"

Linda rolled her eyes. "Now you're just exaggerating."

Iris waited.

"Okay, I happen to like my alcohol, so sue me. I don't overdo it."

"You don't," she allowed. "So maybe you wouldn't mind if we did pot brownies tonight instead."

Linda's jaw dropped, and she laughed.

"Iris Ann West, I didn't know you ate pot brownies."

She leaned forward.

"It's the most dangerous I'll ever get, so enjoy it while you can."

Linda's laugh was frozen in place for a beat too long, which luckily Iris didn't notice. All the times Iris had risked her neck, dodging Linda's questions regarding the safety precautions, she took came into view. She was very sure pot brownies weren't the most dangerous thing Iris had done. But she didn't want to bring that up right now, especially in light of recent events.

"And where shall we get the key ingredient?" she asked, forcing herself out of her thoughts enough to be amused by Iris' suggestion.

"My dad arrested a guy this morning who had pot on him. I'm sure snagging a tiny bit of it for brownies won't be a problem."

Linda's eyes widened. "Isn't that…I don't know…tampering with evidence?"

Iris winked and took a long swig of the coffee, successfully draining the cup. Then she wiped her mouth with her hand and not so subtly wiped it on her black dress pants, momentarily stunning Linda.

"Like I said, the most dangerous."

…

Awake at six a.m. after a long restless night of sleep, Barry got the text while he was making himself some coffee.

Are you okay?

From Joe.

Julian comes back today.

The second text came before he could respond.

He groaned and texted back.

Thanks for the heads up.

Joe probably knew how he was doing. Even if he told him now, he would ask him again later. So, he settled for just addressing the most recent text. His heart was still aching from the events of the night before. He didn't have the strength to get into it right now, even with his strongest support.

He arrived at CCPD miraculously before Julian did. Taking it two steps at a time, he made it to the lab and speed-cleaned his desk, so his critical co-worker couldn't comment on it. Probably still will. He rolled his eyes at the thought. He had to at least try to avoid confrontation or becoming overly irritable in front of his annoying co-worker.

For the next ten minutes, he sat at his desk trying to focus on something – anything. None of the files on his desk were meta-related, and no news of current crime on the streets was coming in. Not from Cisco and not anything he could overhear from downstairs when he passed by. It was a quiet day in Central City, which should have relieved him, but only served to stress him out further.

"Oh, I forgot how annoying you could be."

Barry glanced up, saw the irritated look on Julian's face and realized he'd been rapidly tapping his foot underneath his desk and his fingers on top of it. He stopped.

Julian rolled his eyes and set his bag on his desk, opening it and going through the contents.

"I had a great time at the conference by the way," he said after a while. "Met some very influential people who were very impressed by my title." He paused shuffling through his papers and looked across the room at him. "I took the liberty of saying I was mentoring a new recruit."

Barry's eyes narrowed faintly. "That's me, I'm guessing."

"Fresh out of college and eager to take on the world of forensic science under the reassuring guidance of esteemed head CSI of the CCPD." He beamed, but the sarcasm was dripping from his voice.

"Glad you had a good time," Barry said dryly, starting to flip through his own paper stack.

Suddenly a normal case sounded unbelievably pleasant when compared with hearing about Julian's euphoric week away.

"It's an annual event, so I'll probably go back next year."

Barry held his tongue. He'd been glad for Julian's absence, but in his memory he'd been working for the CCPD for far longer than Julian. Joe had meant well, but it was a blow to his ego. If he ever went himself, he would forever be known as the 'college kid' who was thrilled to have Julian Albert mentoring him.

Just as Julian was opening his mouth to no doubt rub this fact in his face again, Barry heard footsteps coming down the hall and turned his head in that direction. Julian followed suit when he realized he'd lost his co-worker's attention.

"Joe-"

"Detective West," Julian interjected. "What can I do for you?"

We, Barry thought, disgruntled again from the brief interception of pleasant surprise and relief on seeing Joe materialize in the doorway.

"I'm…actually here for Barry," Joe said, pointedly looking in his direction after making the statement clear to Julian. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

"Yeah, of course," Barry said, rounding his desk and walking probably too fast to the hallway outside the lab.

They traveled a short distance until they could hear Julian shuffling papers around again, no longer interested on what was going on between them.

"What's up?" Barry asked, folding his arms across his chest.

"How are you doing?" he asked, sounding concerned.

"How am I-" He blinked. "Joe, did you really pull me out of there just to ask-"

Joe raised an eyebrow.

"Which I am very thankful for," Barry amended. He was.

"So?" Joe prodded.

Barry shrugged.

"I don't know, Joe. Iris and I are broken up for real now. We're done."

"Is that what you want?" he asked.

"It's the right thing," he said. "Neither of us is willing to budge. It's just not going to work between us."

"Right now? Or ever?"

"Ever is a long time."

He didn't say anything for a beat, then –

"I'm just saying…it's not as if you and Iris have only ever been a couple. And it's not as if you fell in love with her yesterday. You've been best friends since you were kids and in love with her just as long. I'm not judging, but…how is it that you've never run into a problem before now that was enough to sever your relationship?"

Barry shrugged helplessly, no answers coming to him.

"I refuse to believe your relationship weakened when you started dating."

"It didn't," he assured. "It was just different. Now it's different again." He took a breath. "Look, Joe, I appreciate your concern, for both of us. But I just…I'm okay. I'm okay enough to be at work, and I'm still going to go back to STAR Labs. I think I can do that. But talking about Iris and everything that's happened…? I need a break from that."

Joe nodded. "Understood."

Barry forced a smile. "Thanks."

"I'll see you later?"

"Sure."

Later came at about 2:15 p.m. when Joe pulled him out of the lab again to ask him about tampering of evidence.

"We arrested a guy around nine a.m. this morning for having pot on him on top of speeding on the side streets; almost knocked a couple kids off the sidewalk. But I just went to check on the bag we took off him, and-"

"It's missing?"

Joe nodded.

"All of it?"

"About half."