Yo. This was written for some Hogwarts stuff:

- Insane House Challenge #77: (character) Fred Weasley

- April Auction day 21: (fandom) The Good Place

- Hogwarts Scavenger #88: Write something exactly 666 words

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Alright. This is a bit of a "The Good Place" crossover, but you don't really have to have seen it to read this. Also, it doesn't give away any spoilers (aka, everything I describe here is described in the first episode)

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Warnings: Character death (this is the afterlife, after all), swearing, and slight hints at grief and ptsd.

Summary: Fred Weasley wakes up, after fighting in the Battle of Hogwarts, to find that the afterlife was not as he had expected it to be.

Rating: High T (for swearing)

Word Count (Excluding A/N): 666

The Good (ish) Place

When Fred opened his eyes, everything was bright. Too bright, considering that when he closed them it was night time.

It was also calm.

Which… again… didn't line up with when he closed his eyes.

He blinked away the vision of the Battle, trying to ignore the screams of pain, or anger that people had been screaming.

Granted, they were all phantom screams, but they were still far too present in Fred's mind. He tried blocking them out, but all he managed to do was shut his eyes. So, he opened them again. And, this time, he actually took a glance around.

He was in a room, a very calm and peaceful room that was well lit. On the wall, or maybe hanging suspended in the air, were the words: Welcome! Everything is fine.

If there was one thing Fred suspected, it was that nothing was truly 'fine.'

…

Apparently, he was in heaven (which he almost found offensive). Well, it wasn't really heaven, but it was a close equivalent. It was the Good Place, where he would be allowed to live in eternal happiness.

Frankly, Fred called bull on it; there was no way that he had gotten into the Good Place. Sure, he was a good human being, but the requirements were insane! Most people in the Good Place had never done anything wrong in their lives! While Fred? Fred had helped design a product to eavesdrop with less of a chance of being caught than 99% of other methods.

No, he didn't belong in this Good Place.

But that didn't mean he wouldn't take advantage of this beautiful opportunity in front of him.

…

It didn't take him long to find out that some of his 'deeds' had been altered.

Like, for instance, the Umbitch… excuse me… Umbridge incident with the fireworks. For some reason, the higher-ups in the Good Place had thought that Fred (along with George, Lee Jordan, and the Golden Trio) had calmly talked Umbridge into changing their ways and hosted a party at the end of the year to celebrate turning another person to the light side.

That wasn't the only story that had gotten changed. The Marauder's Map existed solely to help younger students get around the castle; Weasley's Wizard Wheezes doesn't sell pranks, only Pepper-up potions; and Dudley Dursley had only ever been given normal, Muggle candies.

It was boring. It was dull. They'd practically ripped all of the fun out of his life.

But it was a little entertaining.

…

Most of the things Fred encountered in the Good Place were met with half-amused smiles and slight confusion (though he didn't let the confusion show).

However, learning that he had a soulmate waiting for him here took away the entertainment of it all. Especially when he learned who it was.

"I would have hoped you would make it through the Battle," Fred whispered as he was finally left alone with Lee Jordan: Quidditch commentary extraordinaire, incredible best friend, and overall beautiful man.

Lee gave a half shrug. "Technically I did. Lived until morning… held out long enough to see that your family made it through without any substantial injuries."

"They're all alive?" Fred felt a pang in his chest. The pain was eased slightly when Lee pulled him into a tight hug.

…

"You know we don't belong here, right?" Lee asked, less than two hours of them coming together as soulmates (and, to be honest, Fred wasn't complaining in the slightest).

Fred laughed, turning to face Lee. "Of course we don't. It's an insult to our name!" he shouted before whispering, "but they don't know that we know that we don't belong."

Lee was silent for a minute, a particular glint in his eye that reminded Fred of their good days back in school. "So, we are fucking shit up, right?" he asked, his grin widening.

It only took Fred a split second to answer. "I knew there was a reason that we are soulmates."