"Fuck!"

"What did you now Jamie," an amused Lily asked from where she was lounging on the couch. Peter, who had been sipping at some cheap wine, had already burst out laughing. The three of them were sitting among the scattered remains of a housewarming party at Lily and James's new home in Godric's Hollow. James had decided that the best time to start building a crib for his unborn baby was 2:37 in the morning. For some obscure reason, he had decided to use Muggle methods. It had gone about as well as expected. James was now clutching his bleeding finger and jumping around the living room, swearing violently. "Oi! Not around baby Harry!" Lily said, jokingly clutching her protruding stomach.

The last few years had been kind to Peter Pettigrew. He had built a little family with Lily, James, and soon, Harry. He had friends, true and solid ones, in the Order of the Phoenix. He and Lily had just finished their Auror training when Lily had taken maternity leave. The two of them made a shockingly skillful team. James was pursuing a career in the Wizengamot, hoping to make changes to the world one law at a time.

All the while however, a war raged around them. These little moments of true happiness were far and fleeting. But Peter knew that it would soon end. He remembered every moment of his vision of the future, and he knew that Harry Potter would somehow kill You-Know-Who on Halloween in 1981. In fact, Peter already knew that this plan was in motion. Dumbledore had told Lily and James to go into hiding and had told the three of them, as well as the Longbottoms, that Voldemort was aware of a prophecy that these families may qualify for, depending on when Lily and Alice gave birth. The Potters had not yet put up the Fidelius Charm, but planned to do it right after Harry was born. Lily's due date was approaching rapidly and they planned to go to St. Mungo's for the birth. The magical hospital was the one part of the Wizarding World that neither side had touched, it remained the unofficial ceasefire location, due to the sheer amount of patients from either side continuously coming in and out of it.

Peter woke up at 4 am on the morning of August 1st, 1980 in pain. He soon realized that it was because he was drenched with freezing water. Benjy Fenwick, Peter's roommate, stood above him, looking uncharacteristically somber. "Quickest way to wake you up. We just got a Patronus, there's been an emergency, Dumbledore's calling a full meeting at Hogwarts."

Peter blinked and felt his face turn pale as fear gripped his heart. He grabbed his wand and held out a hand to Benjy, who quickly Apparated the two of them to Hogwarts. It was always safest to Side-Apparate because you had a built-in partner and someone to watch your back. They appeared right outside Hogwarts gates and Peter tapped his wand against them and the two men rushed in. They quickly caught up to Marlene Mckinnon as they entered the castle itself. She gave them a quick nod before bursting into speech.

"I just knew that something was wrong! Emmeline didn't come home! I stayed up all night and just got the Patronus. Do either of you have any clue what's happening?" Marlene's eyes were wet and her voice was shaking in frustration.

Benjy answered for both of them as Peter's mind rapidly spun. James and Lily were at St. Mungo's last night. James sent the message that Harry was born, but I haven't heard a single thing since then. James told me not to come because he didn't want to draw any attention. I shouldn't have listened to them! I should have been there! No, I can't think like that, they must be fine. They both went in disguise.

The three of them had reached Headmistress McGonagall's office and the gargoyle immediately let them through. When Peter shoved the door to the office, he found the entirety of the Order assembled in the cramped office. Dumbledore was sitting behind the desk, his eyes closed and fingers steepled.

"I think that's everyone," Moody said, his voice tired and lacking its usual anger. He nodded to Peter but said nothing more.

Peter had urgently wanted to know what had happened, but now, looking at Dumbledore's face, he wasn't sure if he was prepared.

"I will not beat around the issue. You all deserve to know. St. Mungo's was burned down last night by Voldemort and his closest circle. There were no survivors."

There was a beat, and then the knut dropped in everyone's minds. Marlene fell to the floor and moaned in horror. The reaction was echoed around the room as quiet sobbing filled the office. Peter felt the world spin around him and Benjy had caught him before he realized that he was about to fall. "Li-Lily and James and their baby, Merlin please, please tell me they're safe!"

"Peter, I am so sorry," Dumbledore said softly.

NO!NO!NO!NO! If Harry was dead then everything was lost, the world was doomed. I should have been there! I could have saved them, I could have saved him! FUCK!FUCK!FUCK! Peter tried to figure out his next move as the world collapsed around him. I can't join Him, it's way too late for that. Nice going Pete, you thought you'd do the honorable thing and stay with the Order and that failed! The thing I saw so long ago told me that the future I saw was a failed one, but how is this one any better! Peter gasped for breath as he had realized the gravity of his mistakes. He had to pull himself together or he would die. "I have to go," he managed to whisper to Benjy, "I need to be alone right now." Benjy seemed to barely hear him, but that no longer mattered. Peter flooed to the Leaky Cauldron from McGonagall's office and apparated to his apartment from there.

I have to leave Britain. There's no hope left here. This future is better because I am still alive! It is staying that way! Peter quickly shoved the essentials into a backpack and Apparated to Godric's Hollow. He stood in front of James and Lily's home for what felt like years. He was once again on the precipice of a decision that could make or break him. Rule number one: survive. Peter let out a shaky breath and turned on his heel once again, Apparating to a Muggle dock. He had worked out this plan when he had first graduated from Hogwarts and hoped that he would never have to use it. He found the cargo ship he was looking for and Apparated into it. The ship was heading for France. In France he would confound himself onto a plane to America where his new life would begin.

I am going to survive.

NINETEEN YEARS LATER

"Mom! Mom! I got my letter!" Jem Pettigrew rushed into the house clutching a piece of paper. "Mom!"

"I think Mom heard you sport," Peter said amusedly.

"DAD! I got my letter!"

Peter laughed gleefully and swung his eleven year old son around. There was a thumping noise as what sounded like a herd of hippogriffs rushed down the stairs. It was his other two children, Daisy and Nathaniel. Their mother followed soon after, balancing a pile of clothes. Marlene Pettigrew née Mckinnon was smiling brightly and dropped her load in Peter's arms so she could hug Jem tightly. "My little boy, off to Illvermony already."

"Mom! Ugh! Can we go get my wand!"

"We'll go shopping in an hour Jem, let me put my things away first," Peter replied, mussing up his son's hair.

"Dad! How was your trip?" Daisy asked eagerly. Peter had just returned from a two-week trip to Britain to be confronted with Jem's overexcited nature.

"Britain is well Britain," Peter responded with a grimace. The country was still recovering from war. The ICW had finally stepped in three years ago and put an end to Voldemort's reign. By that time, Peter, Marlene, and their kids had been completely settled into America and had no desire to move back. Marlene seemed to understand his meaning and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek.

"Alright you lot, go and finish your chores and we can go to the city to buy Jem's things. Nate, I'm sure you got your letter for third year too, so we'll get your things too." The kids rushed off to do as she asked, eager to venture into the city. Due to their parents' paranoia, they didn't often go into the magical world.

"Pete, are you alright?"

He sighed and ran a hand over his face. "I'm about as well as I can be. Britain is still an absolute mess."

"How unexpected," she returned dryly. Marlene squeezed Peter's hand, "It'll get better for them, it has to."

"I went and saw Sirius," Peter said suddenly, looking down at the floor.

"Oh," she gasped. Marlene knew how much hatred Peter held for Sirius, and surprisingly, Remus. "Er, how was he?"

"Same old Sirius," he scoffed. "Honestly, he's barely changed, despite decades of imprisonment."

Peter clenched his fists in a show of anger that he knew his wife expected. But honestly, I'm not mad. He can act however he wants, but he's still spent over 20 years with Dementors. Peter had told Sirius everything, from the vision to his plan to James to the hospital. He had told him about his wonderful life in America and taken pleasure in Sirius's fury.

I won Paddy, plain and simple, thought Peter, looking around at his beautiful home, his understanding wife, and hearing the sounds of his children's laughter from upstairs. He felt cruel laughter bubble up in his throat and smiled sharply. I WON!

AN: Well, that's it folks. I hope you enjoyed this little what-if story. I don't expect to continue the story, but if anyone wants to use anything from the fic (characters, plotlines, magical elements) feel free to PM me. I'll definitely say yes, I just want to know what you're planning on using it for. This fic was supposed to be a mix of the time travel and character-reads-the-books tropes on an unlikely and unlikable character: Peter Pettigrew. I hope I made him a bit more relatable and likable while still keeping his desire to survive no matter what the same. (And yes, I know this fic was a bit heavy on the italics.)