After 3 months Sheldon and Amy sort of had a handle on things.
"I don't think I should go" Amy said to Penny and Bernadette as they handed her a dress to try on.
"Amy you need this. Trust us."
"Yeah. You've ate, slept, and breathed baby for the past three months. This will just help you to remember life outside of the twins."
"I know all of that, but what about Sheldon? He's never been alone with them before."
"All the guys are downstairs with him sweetie."
"Along with Halley, Michael and Luke. There are more children than adults."
"It will be fine. It's nothing too long, just lunch" Penny said handing her another dress.
After 30 minutes of trying on clothes and coaxing Amy was finally dressed. "So there's milk in the fridge, they would need a feeding in about hour or less. "
"Yes, I know Amy"
"Remember they just took a nap so they might be up a while"
"Yes, I know Amy"
"If they start crying remember not to sing the same song"
"Amy, you do realize these are my children. I do know them"
"I'm sorry. I've just never been away from them for more than the 15 minutes it takes to shower."
"Which is all the more reason why you need this" Sheldon said ushering towards a waiting Penny and Bernadette by the door.
"Remember to call me if anything happens"
"Yes, I know Amy"
Just as she was about to leave, she heard Stephen whimper from the living room "Maybe I should stay" she said walking towards her son
"Oh no you don't" Penny said grabbing her hand and dragging her out the house, "It would be fine Amy. It's like Daddy and Raj daycare" Bernadette said when they were in the car. Amy sighed, "I guess" she said playing with her phone.
Bernadette was right, it was fine - for the first 45 minutes. Then all hell broke loose.
The guys had the twins in a baby swing near their feet, Luke was playing with some blocks, while Halley and Michael were watching a video on Howard's phone, and the guys were playing video games.
"Isn't almost time to feed them" Raj asked after they finished a round. Sheldon checked his watch, "I suppose" Sheldon said getting up from the couch, "Relax dude, I got it" Raj said getting up. "It's in the Ziploc bag with the green tag" he called out after him.
"What is that smell?" Leonard asked while they were waiting on Raj
"Don't look at me" Howard said, "my kids are potty trained"
Leonard looked at Luke but he wasn't fidgety like he usually would be if he had a soiled diaper. All three of them looked towards the twins, who were sitting content in their swings. "It can't be" Sheldon said, but at that time Marie kicked one of her legs and they all saw it smeared across her leg. "No no no" Sheldon cried crouching next to her. He rolled her to the side as much as possible without touching her leg, and discovered that the back as well as the side of her onesie was also soiled, "Why Marie? Can one of you check Stephen?" he asked
"He's clean" Howard announced, "but Marie's gonna need a shower"
"I don't even understand how" Sheldon said
"Oh I do not miss that part" Leonard laughed
"This is not funny Leonard" Sheldon hissed, "Where are we even going to clean you?"
"You guys have a hose right?" Howard said
"We are not hosing my child off like some kind of animal"
"Alright, would you rather take her to the sink or maybe your bathtub"
Sheldon grimaced, "Fine, but we're putting the hose on the gentlest setting" he said lifting up Marie and holding her arm's length away. "Leonard get a new diaper and Howard go open the door" Sheldon said standing up.
"Raj you have to watch the kids for a while" Leonard said
"What happened?"
"Marie exploded"
As soon as the door slammed behind Howard and Sheldon, Stephen started to cry, causing Luke to drop his blocks and stare at him.
"There there little one" Raj cooed, but he still continued to cry. Raj tried to pick him up to rock him, but he kept on crying. Leonard came down the stairs with a diaper and new onesie, "Ask Sheldon what calms him down" Leonard nodded in response. A minute later, he poked his head back in the house and said, "he said hold him on your left side and sing somewhere over the rainbow"
"Maybe I should call" Amy said picking up her phone for the fifth time.
"Amy no"
"They haven't called by now which means everything is fine"
"Or everything is going wrong"
"Amy everything is fine. You just have a little separation anxiety"
"Can't we just go home and check, we're like 10 minutes away"
Penny sighed, "this goes against the whole purpose of today, but, call Sheldon and when you see everything's fine you would be able to relax"
Amy grabbed her phone and dialed Sheldon's number, "Hello? Raj is that you? Why do you have Sheldon's phone… is that Stephen crying?...Where's Sheldon?... Exploded?... What do you mean you can't find Luke?... Who's taking off their shirt Raj? Hello?" she pulled the phone away from her ears, "He hung up"
"Okay, we're leaving right now" Bernadette said signaling a waitress.
"No we're not putting on a onesie on her. What if she does it again" Sheldon said
"Sheldon you can't leave her naked"
"First of all she's not naked she has on a diaper and secondly, we'll cover her with a blanket"he carried Marie back into the living room and was meet with the sight of a shirtless Raj holding a crying Stephen, "Why is your shirt off"
"He wouldn't calm down, and I read that skin to skin helps babies"
"Not when you smell like the perfume section of the mall" Howard said, "Halley why is your shirt off" he said picking up her abandoned shirt
"Uncle Raj did it" she said, as if that offered all the explanation.
"Where's Luke/.' Leonard asked
"I have no clue. He was here and then he was gone"
"Aww man. Luke buddy come on." Leonard called after his son while searching the hous. Luke recently learned to walk and who knew what kind of trouble he could be in.
"Look hold Marie. I'll get their bottles" Sheldon said handing Marie to Howard. He went into the kitchen to get the bottles but didn't notice Luke on the floor and tripped over his little leg, causing him to go crashing on the floor, sending milk all over himself and Luke.
Amy opened the front door and was met with a sight of a shirtless Raj still trying to comfort Stephen; Howard trying to coax Halley back in her shirt while holding Marie; Leonard calling out for Luke; and a wet Sheldon holding a wet giggling Luke.
"Amy, you're home" Sheldon said when he saw her, causing all the guys to look up. They were all waiting for the string of questions and shouts that would follow, but it never came. Instead all the girls busted out in a full belly laugh that shocked all the guys. "This is so going to be my new screensaver" Penny said as she snapped a picture of the guys. Amy dried her eyes and took Stephen from Raj, who quieted down instantly
"How? How did she do that?" Raj asked
"Don't even try" Sheldon said handing Luke to Penny
Bernadette managed to get Halley back in her shirt. "What's this on the baby swing" Penny asked causing all the guys to groan.