Please Let Me Help You
Rey sat at a small desk, tinkering with Luke's broken lightsaber. She had been trying for months to heal the kyber crystal and she was almost done with this particular power coupling that would help keep it stable. Then she felt him again. The world around her silenced and she squeezed her eyes shut tightly. Both of them were still in pain over those fateful moments that took place in Snoke's throne room, and on Crait. During the past couple of months, they tried to ignore each other whenever the Bond connected them through space and time. The most amount of time they had interacted were occasional brief and angry outbursts, or just a few seconds of eye contact before both looked away, unable to maintain each other's gaze. So her eyes were closed tightly, so she could prepare herself. But it was also so the tears welling up in the back of her eyes wouldn't fall. She had spent more nights than she'd like to admit crying herself to sleep. Rey inhaled deeply as she prepared herself to face him. She turned around while sitting on a stool. She opened her eyes and gasped.
Kylo Ren winced as his side screamed in pain from his severely bruised, possibly broken ribs. Most of his face and body were covered in either dried blood or dirt. Breathing heavily, he tried to strip himself of his heavy outerwear. He flung his long black cloak off his shoulders and it fell in a crumpled heap on the ground. His shirt was plastered with dried blood so he was forced to cut the shirt to pull it off. He hissed in pain as the fabric dragged against his scraped and bloodied skin. He kicked off his boots as his eyes searched his room for bandages, some bacta patches or really anything. Due to his movement, his side had started bleeding again. He groaned in frustration as he struggled to stand up straight. Then the familiar sensation of detachment from the rest of the world overcame him. Kylo turned his head, afraid of what he might see. Sure enough, he was staring into Rey's hazel eyes.
Rey gasped in horror when she saw Kylo Ren. He was barely standing upright, his face was covered in muck and dried blood, his side was bleeding heavily, and his bare torso was riddled with cuts and bruises and scars. She quickly stood up and without even thinking about it went to him, barely stopping herself a few inches away from him. She could feel his body heat radiating off him. He was breathing heavily as he beheld her face. Their eyes locked and they both shuddered. They were so close to each other. Rey then did allow tears to fall down her face, and Kylo watched them drip down her freckled cheeks. He lifted his hand that wasn't clutching at his side and gently wiped them away with his thumb. Rey shook as she cried softly and tentatively brought her hand up to his face, her fingertips feeling like the caress of a breeze on his skin.
Rey allowed her tears to flow freely as she took in the sight of Kylo's body. No matter how angry she was with him, she couldn't deny that she cared for him deeply in one way or another. She felt a wave of rising anger for whoever had done this to him, and some of her anger was directed at him for getting himself hurt so badly. He must have just come from some sort of battle, she didn't know where. She knew some of the Resistance had engaged in relatively small skirmishes with the First Order, but she didn't know where. To think that some of her friends might have caused this only added to her conflicted feelings. Rey felt her anger bubbling up inside her chest and she felt as if she were about to burst. Then she felt a warm hand against her face and she opened her eyes to see Kylo brushing away her tears, and her anger dissolved almost instantly at the tender gesture. Then she came back to reality. Why was he comforting her? He was the one who was badly injured.
"What happened?" was all she could get out of her mouth. Her hand gingerly lay on his jaw, tracing the scar she had given him so long ago on Starkiller Base.
Kylo saw genuine concern in her eyes and his heart twisted slightly. He shrugged half-heartedly, then winced slightly as the movement brought more pain to his side.
"I got caught off guard," he said quietly. Rey looked at him like she didn't believe him. He was one of the most fearsome and skilled warriors in the galaxy and he got caught off guard? Kylo avoided her gaze as he sensed her thoughts. Rey's fingertips stopped moving and her hand came down from his face. He felt electricity where her touch had been. She looked at him skeptically, not believing him at all. Kylo sighed in defeat, knowing he couldn't truly hide anything from her and granted her access into his mind. Rey winced as she saw Kylo's memories as if she herself could feel his physical pain before she carefully withdrew from his mind. She lifted her gaze to meet his dark eyes. Then she cleared her throat uncomfortably and looked at his side again.
"You're bleeding," she said, and then blushed when she stated the obvious. The corners of Kylo's lips turned up ever so slightly at her embarrassment. Rey took a few steps away from him and he instantly missed her warmth. Rey quickly opened a drawer and brought out some sparse medical supplies. As she came back to him, he started to protest slightly that he could do it himself. Rey stopped him by placing a slender finger over his lips. "Please," she whispered. "Let me help you." He stared at her for a moment before finally relenting and nodded.
He sat down on a chair so Rey could reach him. She dipped a clean rag in water and began to wipe away the blood and dirt on his chest and abs. He shivered slightly at the cold water, but he shook even more so as he felt Rey's hands touching his skin. Her eyebrows were wrinkled in concern and concentration as she tried to clean his side without hurting him. He breathed in sharply when she touched a particularly sensitive patch of raw skin.
"Sorry!" she said as she quickly withdrew her hand. "Did I hurt you?" Kylo shook his head and looked down at her. Her hand had pulled away from him and he gently placed his hand over hers and guided it back to his side.
When the dirt and most of the blood was gone, Rey took out the disinfectant. "This is going to sting," she whispered. He chuckled slightly as he looked at her.
"I've gotten shot by a bowcaster and my face slashed by a lightsaber, I think I can handle this." She winced slightly when he mentioned the scar she had given him. His expression became one of regret as he saw her cringe. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean-" He trailed off when Rey gave his hand a light squeeze to let him know that it was ok. She carefully began to clean his wound with the disinfectant. It did sting slightly, but that sensation was nothing compared to what Rey's touch was doing to him. Her fingers were warm and slightly wet from the water as she gingerly tended to his wound. When she was done, she looked around for the bandages. Kylo caught sight of them on the desk nearby and handed it to her. She blushed slightly as she took it from him.
"Can you stand?" she asked softly. Kylo nodded and rose to a standing position carefully. Rey gave him a moment to steady himself and looked at his face. There was still blood on his cheek and jaw so she lifted her hand to gently wipe his face with the cloth. He stilled and looked at her with a gaze that set her on fire. It was more intense than the heat of Jakku's desert. Her hand was still on his cheek when he lifted his own hand. His thumb brushed against her cheekbone, mirroring her position. Rey felt herself lean into his touch slightly before realizing what she was doing. She lowered her hand and cleared her throat. His hand cradled her cheek a moment longer before letting her go. Rey kept her eyes down but let her hand rest on the toned muscles of his abs for a moment.
Rey pressed one end of the bandage on his side and held it there with her hand. She started to wrap it around his torso but froze when she realized she was practically hugging him, bare-chested. His large frame dwarfed her petite stature so completely that there was no other way she could reach around his back. Rey's cheeks flushed red as she tried to avoid Kylo's gaze.
Kylo looked down at her red face and smirked slightly. She looked up and glared at him which only made him smile more. He responded by taking one step forward so that it was easier for her to reach around him. In doing so, he completely closed the distance between their bodies and Rey inhaled sharply in shock.
Their skin was pressed against each other and Rey's heart was pounding so hard she could almost hear it. She hesitated for a moment longer, and Kylo sighed softly and gently grasped her upper arm for support and to bring her closer to him. Rey swallowed hard as she tried to force herself not to gawk any longer than she already had. She carefully reached all the way around his chest, practically hugging him at this point. She wrapped the bandage over his ribs until it was secure. She moved to step back but Kylo didn't let go of her arm. She craned her neck back slightly to look up at him. He was so close to her, their faces were mere inches apart.
"Ben," Rey said softly, as she gently removed his hand from her arm. "I need to get something for your face, too." She motioned at the remaining blood and dirt on his face. He slowly nodded and released her. As she went to retrieve the rag, she could feel his gaze on her. She turned back to face him and placed her hand on his cheek. He leaned into her touch slightly and Rey tried not to shiver as she brought her other hand up with the rag to wipe at his face. His gaze never left her as she worked. She wiped the dirt off his forehead and then the blood off of his cheek and jaw. When she was done, she placed the rag on the table beside her but didn't remove her other hand from his cheek. Kylo's, no, Ben's hand reached up and held her hand against his face. His eyes had softened and were vulnerable and nervous now, lacking the detached confidence of Kylo Ren. This was her Ben staring back at her.
His other arm gently touched her waist, pulling her against him. Rey allowed her other hand to rest on his chest, and she could feel the pounding of his heart matching her own. It was moments like these that gave her hope that Ben Solo was still there, that he still could be turned. So she gave in to her desires and let her head rest against his bare chest. She heard him inhale in surprise, but then he too allowed his arms to hold her. His head rested gently on top of hers. The rhythms of their hearts and breaths were in sync that it felt like they were one being instead of two.
Ben felt Rey tremble slightly in his arms as she began to cry softly. He hugged her tighter, wishing he could make her pain go away and silently cursing the damned circumstances they were in. In reality, they were light-years apart from each other, each fighting on a different side of a war. They were supposed to be enemies, and yet here he was, holding her in his arms as she wept into his chest.
Rey cried because she was so tired of fighting with him. Fighting against him. She wished this moment would just last forever and that there didn't need to be so many complications in the galaxy that kept them apart. She hadn't realized how much it had drained her to keep him out, to avoid the Bond. So she let herself hug him tightly and let her tears fall.
Ben's hand moved to stroke her hair, which fell across her shoulders. He whispered softly, "You kept your hair down." Rey pulled back slightly to look at him in confusion.
"I did," she whispered back.
"It looks nice," he gave her a small, tender smile. He felt her hands move back up to caress his face gently.
"Ben," Rey whispered softly.
"Rey," he whispered back. They hadn't noticed that they were slowly leaning into each other until there was almost no space between them. He stopped suddenly. Their breaths were mixing and he looked straight into her hazel eyes. "Rey," he hesitated, "we should probably-" he was cut off abruptly when Rey closed the distance between them completely, and her lips crashed against his. Ben froze for a moment, before softening and pulling her flush against him.
Rey shocked herself by kissing him, but almost immediately felt Ben's arms wrap around her as he kissed her back. Their lips molded together as if they were made for each other. Rey stood on her tiptoes and wrapped her arms around his neck to pull him closer to her as she moved her lips desperately against his. He kissed her back just as fervently. She parted her lips to give him access to her mouth and he deepened the kiss.
Ben felt intoxicated tasting her mouth as her lips parted. His tongue swept inside to meet hers and he practically melted when he heard her moan softly against his lips. Everywhere they touched left trails of fire behind. Ben's hand moved to the back of her neck to deepen the kiss as his other remained on the small of her back.
Rey arched her back into him to maximize their contact. He groaned slightly and she melted into his touch more. She moved her hands to run down his muscled biceps and over his broad shoulders. Rey didn't care about anything else at that moment. She just wanted to feel as much of Ben as possible. She opened her mouth more to deepen their embrace. His lips were so soft and warm as they caressed her own. She needed to breathe but found that tasting him was much more important. The flood of emotions that they were sending back and forth to each other through the Bond was overwhelming. Even though both were still hurt over how events had played out on the Supremecy and Crait, neither of them could deny that they both cared for each other deeply. Rey felt her relief of just being here with him mix with Ben's and her chest tightened. Her head seemed to remember that they were enemies, that they shouldn't be doing this. Rey's heart twisted and she shoved that thought away as she tried to focus on just being there with him. Focusing on his large hand encompassing the back of her neck, his arm wrapped around her waist, the hard muscles of his chest under her fingertips, and his warm lips against hers.
They kissed until they were forced to break away for oxygen. Both were panting heavily as they stared at each other in shock. Rey kept her forehead pressed against Ben's and kept her hands on his face. As they caught their breath, the ocean of emotions between them washed away everything else. Rey looked into Ben's dark brown eyes, and she gently ran her thumb over his swollen lip. Ben closed his eyes briefly as he shivered from her touch.
"Rey…" he said and opened his mouth to say more. Then he was gone, and Rey was left staring at the wall of her room.
"Ben…" she whispered shakily. She sat down on her stool on wobbly legs and then began to cry as she noticed that the bandages she had used for his wounds were still on her desk.
*I know this isn't canon and doesn't really make sense with the state their characters were in at that moment but I thought it would be a cute and interesting scene to write and I wanted to write some fluff lol.