The streets of L.A. are not a good place to be homeless in, but unfortunately for Mario, this was the life he was consigned to now. After 10 years of going down a weed pipe, his life was utterly destroyed by his dependence on that cursed weed pipe and now mario was left as a useless hobo on the streets.

"darn, i think someone warned me about the dangers of going down this weed pipe a long time ago. I really should have listened to them. Oh well, at least I still have my weed pipe to keep me company." said mario, going down the weed pipe once more for his 7th fix that day.

After his weed pipe session, mario realized he needed sustenance in order to exist in this society. So he grabbed his spear and got ready to on the hunt. The lands of L.A. were wild and untamed, perfect for the apex hunter that was mario.

Mario slowly approached a small pool of water and began to scan his eyes, looking for his next meal of perhaps a small fish or a seaweed snack. His eyes soon met on a small figure thrashing about in the pool, and mario knew it was his time to strike.

However, mario's actions were soon met with immediate criticism. A police officer soon approached him and tried to pull him away or find a way to dis arm him.

"hey man, get off me! Not everyone can afford to live as lavishly as you, pig!" shouted mario, trying to get the policeman off of him.

"sir, this is a public fountain, and you were attacking a small child that fell in by accident." said the police officer

"Hey, its not my fault that child fell in there. If he didn't want to be attacked, he shouldn't have fallen in there in the first place." protested mario.

"Look, just get out of here before I'm forced to beat you up like any respectable police officer would do." said the police officer.

Unfortunately, mario couldn't risk such a threat and was forced to continue to live under the oppressive authority of this capitalist society.

"oh well, at least I still have my weed pipe." said mario

but this expresssion was ill timed as mario came back to his corner in the alley to find that his weed pipe was missing. OMG!

"This cannot stand!" said mario, sitting down.

Fortunately for him, a clue to finding out this mystery was found in the form of a note laying on the ground where his weed pipe formerly laid. At first mario was dissapointed in such a trade, as mario couldn't go down a piece of paper and get high like he could a weed pipe. However, this all changed when mario discovered that the paper had writing on it. What a discovery!

Mario was a bit rusty when it comes to reading exactly what the letter said, but he managed to get through just ok. The letter in questioned read:

Dear Pesky Plumber,

The Koopalings and I have taken over the Mushroom Kingdom!

Your Weed Pipe is now a permanent guest at one of my seven Koopa hotels,

I dare you to find it if you can!

From,

Bowser

"I gotta find that weed pipe!" said mario

Now mario was forced to shape up if he wanted to go and rescue his weed pipe. Of course, to mario it was easy to get to the mushroom kingdom, the hard part was managing to rescue his weed pipe. Fortunatley for you, the audience, all that koopaling crap was super boring so I'll just skip to the part where he kills bowser's bitch ass.

Mario stood proudly in front of bowser's menacing, but epic looking castle. What was once a desperate and pathetic man had been shaped and molded into a heroic and brave plumber man, thanks to some extremely deep and compelling character development that happened off screen.

"looks like this is it," said Mario, his six-pack glistened against the fiery doors of bowser's castle "wouldn't you agree, Bowser Jr.?"

he looked down at his former-enemy turned friend, bowser jr., who had grown closer to him despite all odds in an extremely gripping and heart-rending scene between the two.

"I sure am! My pops got nothing on you, you fantastic hunk of linguini!" said bowser jr admirably.

The two immediately charged through the castle like it was nothing, not even bowser's most elite troops, the hammer brothers, could stop them both.

They entered the throne room confidently, and before them stood bowser himself, and beside him was the fabled weed pipe, the object of his desire that he had dedicated this entire journey to. Peach was also there too, but nobody cared.

"Alright bowser, hand it over!" said mario, in reference to the weed pipe and not peach.

"Oh, you want it, don't you? You'll have to pry it from my cold, dead hands!" said bowser.

The two charged at one another in an epic clash of destiny. But mario won because he is the main character. Bowser layed defeated on the ground, but mario wouldn't kill him because he is also a nice guy.

"Please spare me," said bowser "you can take the weed pipe, but you must know one thing."

mario was confused, but intrigued. He was careful so it wouldn't be a trap. Soon, bowser got up and began to look as if he was undressing. Just then, mario realized that this bowser was no bowser at all, but a hyperrealistic fur suit that just so happened to look exactly like bowser, and it looked the the culprit was taking off this elaborate suit.

"Could it be?" said mario, tears streaming down his face.

Then, suddenly before him stood his tall lanky counterpart, clad in green.

"Who are you?" said mario

"Its me mario, your brother, Luigi." Luigi said, holding out his arms to embrace his brother.

"But luigi, I thought you died all those years ago due to the coronavirus." said mario in reference to this topic situation that will certainly age well.

"No mario, I faked my death at the hands of the weed pipe all those years ago in order to make sure you'd never use it for evil. However, I was wrong and my warning went unheeded. The only thing left to do was to steal the weed pipe in a vain hope that I'd have my brother back." said Luigi, with tears in his eyes.

"Luigi, I've really grown and changed on this long and arduous journey, and only now do I realize that I never really needed the weed pipe... I needed you." said mario, embracing his brother for the first time in years.

Finally the two had reunited, and the coins mario had collected on his journey allowed them to buy a stable home and live a peaceful life.

2 weeks later Luigi came home from his job as a plumber (what else do you think they worked as). Upon entering the living room he found mario in a trance.

"mario, what are you doing." said Luigi

"yo, did you know if you jumped down this weed pipe you could like, get super high lmao." said mario

"goddammit" said Luigi

THE END