Chapter 30
She lays there, on top of his firm slender body all night, trying to take in his warmth and love. Never really wanting to let this time go. She knew this could be it forever, once he knew the real truth. She could lose his love and friendship once again, just this time for always. She stays awake in his arms all night just thinking of how to put this. How to tell him the real truth, without breaking him. In a way to let him believe she wasn't trying to hurt him in any way.
She knew just how hard it was to build trust with him. How closed off and hard he was to let anyone in. She even knew all that she did for him, he would forget once he found out the truth. It was just time it came out, not because of Kaname or any other reason, but it was time for him to know the truth. It wasn't something she could hide forever, too many people knew her, and she wouldn't be able to keep this hidden too much longer anyway.
The morning comes bright and early, the birds outside the window singing and chirping away. She still lays there terrified just trying not to fall back into the little frightened girl, she always was in the past. She needed to be the woman she has become in the last few years to be able to pull this off.
"Good Morning," Zero says.
"Morning." She replies kissing him softly.
"Are you ready to tell me what the hell is really going on? Last night was great but I want to know the truth. I want to know who I am really sleeping with? I asked for your name, I don't think that was too hard of a question to answer. Do you? All these months and I really know nothing about you. To find out that you know Kaname, was a shock, one I am not happy to find out." Zero states.
"In a way, it is hard to tell you my name. I have been up all night trying to figure out just how to tell you. The only way I can think of is through blood. That way you can see and feel for yourself. Otherwise, you will never believe me. I don't want to talk about Kaname, this is between us." She answers.
"Why didn't you ever offer your blood before? I also thought if vampires cared for each other that went along with sex? That they shared both together." Zero asks.
"It does, just once you taste it, you will know who I am. I was trying to keep that hidden for a while for many reasons. I do crave you very much to the point I find myself biting myself to help with the pain." She admits.
"You don't have to do that, I would gladly offer my blood to you. I don't know what all the secrets are about. I just know I don't like it. I don't want a relationship built on lies." Zero replies.
"I know and I am sorry. I never lied, I just never told. I couldn't ask to take from you without offering mine in return. Now I am offering it to you. I just hope if you can't forgive me, the craving for my blood doesn't take over you." She states.
"I wish you would let me make up my own mind with things. I am a grown man, I have craved someone in the past and I got over it. I can handle whatever you have to tell me. This is ridiculous. If this is all a game you can just say so and I will leave." Zero responds.
"It won't be once you know. I just want you to know that I truly love you Zero. It took me a long time to realize just how much. To see what I really wanted. It was you all the while. This isn't a game, it never has been." She admits.
"it's only been a few months we know each other, you don't have to get so dramatic on me. "Zero says.
She just knew that Zero didn't get it. She loved him her whole life and always would. He would figure that out after the bite. It would tell if he would stay or leave her forever. She just sits up in the bed looking into his lavender eyes, hers filled with pain and sorrow. She has been through so much, and so was he. Would they finally be happy together? Or would this cause them to break forever? She didn't know and was scared to find out.