Warning: implied sexual assault. Nothing graphic.

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6) Falling Apart.

Robb felt lost and confused having all the honors of a Lord bestowed upon him while his father was still alive. It wasn't right. He was not supposed to be Lord until his father died. … His father, the man he had always looked up to. He didn't know what to think. He felt proud of his actions to save Jon's life – and he knew he would have done the same. The Lone Wolf dies but the pack survives. Family Duty Honor. Families stick together and protect each other, they have a duty to one another. But, at the same time, his father had endangered everyone with his lies. The sting of betrayal still burned in his heart, something he could also see on Jon's and his mother's face. And he could still feel the pain and the effects of the torture he had endured at the hands of Robert. … And Robert. He wanted to hate the man. No, he hated the man with passion! What the king had done to him and his family was inexcusable. But on the other hand he knew his family had been lucky. Had his father and the King not been friends, they would have all been executed. His father had indeed lied and committed treason – even if for the right reasons.

He pondered about things he would have to do as Lord and wondered if he was ready. If he ever punished a man for his deeds, will he or his sons hate him the way he hated King Robert? If he had to punish a friend, would he do it? Or would he cave in, like Robert had?

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Bran was sitting alone in his room. His Septa had already packed his clothes and now all he needed to include were his personal belongings and toys. His mother had come to visit him but she had been so overwhelmed with grief that she had barely been able to utter a word. His father had been very quiet, too. Arya and Sansa had come as well, and also Robb and Jon. His younger brother Rickon had come and given him one of his toys. "So that when you play with it, it's like you're playing with me" he had said. He was grateful for their visits, but they all filled him with sadness about his upcoming departure. They all made him feel like he would never see them again. And he hated that feeling.

Suddenly, someone unexpected came to visit him, not because they didn't share any bond, but because they rarely interacted. The age difference was too big for them to be considered friends.

"Hello Bran, may I come in?" Theon called from the door.

"Hi" was all he said.

"I know you're sad" Theon started coming to sit next to him. "I know how it feels."

"No, you don't. You get to stay home with mother and father and I get to leave" he pouted.

"But they are not my mother and father. I am you, Bran. I was like you. My father committed treason and I was taken to make sure he behaved. Just like you, I was taken away from everything I knew and loved by the people who had hurt my family. I hated your father at the beginning. I hated it here. I hated your family. And I hated my father. My life is only as long as his good behavior. But here's the difference. You father loves you and will never risk your life. You will be safe Bran. You won't live in the fear that I live. And you will see your family again. I know your parents will do all they can to see you again."

"I hope so."

"Never lose your hope Bran. And let me give you some advise. Never forget who you are, you're a Stark and a Tully, but never reject what you will become. When I was first brought here, I had a choice. I could live in a world surrounded by rage and hatred, or I could try and make a life for myself and find a space of my own with people I could grow to love. Your family helped me make that choice. Give the new family a chance. Give yourself a chance to have an enjoyable life, just as I have."

"Thank you, Theon" Bran smiled.

"Ah, come here!" the Greyjoy ward hugged the little boy.

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Ned felt hollow and alone, like he had never felt before. He had let his family down and they had suffered because of him. He had seen the bruises on his wife and his boys. He had seen how affected by the whole ordeal his younger children had been. And now his little Bran was going to be taken away from him.

Robb had visited him to share what had transpired in his conversations with the Lords. They had all sworn fealty to him but had remained somewhat detached and Robb had seen doubt in their eyes. He had not seen the love for him they had all shown for his father. Ned had tried to reassure him and told him that loyalty is earned and that in time and with effort he would be able to gain their trust. But Ned wasn't sure if those words were just for his son's sake or if he was trying to convince himself as well. His son had a daunting task ahead of him.

He tried to get close to his wife, but seeing her otherwise strong and cheerful wife reduced to a wailing mess curling in bed was too painful. After being released from the cells they had not been allowed to see each other until that feast in the hall. Throughout the whole event and while Robert gave his judgment she had refused to meet his eyes and after that she had refused to share her room with him. So he had gone back to his old room, the one he had used at the beginning of their marriage when they were just strangers who only shared a name.

He knocked on her door expecting her to welcome him into her loving arms. How naïve had he been. Her words were courteous, but her eyes betrayed her. It was painful to see she could not stand his presence.

"I'm sorry, my love" he said.

"I know."

"I never meant to hurt any of you."

"I know."

"I love you."

"I know. And that's why it's so hard for me to reconcile what I know you feel with your actions. I understand you not telling me at the beginning, you hardly knew me. But seventeen years and five children later I still have not gained your trust. Seventeen years of living in fear of a threat that really wasn't there, resenting a shame that never really happened and fighting the ghost of a woman who never really existed. It's difficult to digest, Ned." She was trying hard to keep her tears at bay.

"Then tell me what I can do to make this better. You were always better at us" he motioned to the space in between them "than I was."

"What to do?" she cried. "Our son was tortured. We were tortured. Robb has been placed in a terrible position as a green and inexperienced Lord of bannermen who do not trust him. Jon has just had his whole life turned upside down and now faces a life without a future. They are taking Bran away. What to do? I don't know Ned."

"We'll make it work, I promise"

"Look, knowing what I know now, I don't begrudge you saving Jon's life the way you did. But lying to us the way you did is inexcusable. You did put us all in grave danger. I'm not saying you shouldn't have brought Jon with you, but if you had told us, together we would have come up with something, some plan. And this wouldn't have happened."

"I'm sorry, again."

A knock on the door interrupted their conversation. Maester Luwin was bringing her some tea. When he saw Ned he immediately looked abashed and raised his eyes worriedly at Catelyn. "Just leave it on my dresser" Catelyn told him and the Maester left as quickly as he had come. When Ned offered to bring it to her, she politely refused and swiftly dismissed his offer. Not wanting for her tea to grow cold Ned stood up and fetched it.

"Moon tea" he noticed and stared at his wife. "Oh, Gods! Don't tell me! Did Robert do this to you?"

"At least with this there will be no … consequences" she said and flinched at her own choice of words.

Ned could not take it any more and hugged his wife.

"We will make this better, I promise!"

"Will we?" she countered staring into space, her arms falling passively on the sheets not returning his hug. "You promise too many things Ned."

"Oh, my love. We have had our ups and downs, but we have always overcome them. And I'm sure we will get over this. Somehow. I am weak, but you're strong for the both of us. I need you. I can't do this alone. And you can't live like this for the rest of your life. Our children need us. I need you. Please."

"I know" she whispered and collapsed into his embrace. They both drew strength from one another as she laid her head on the usual place on the crook of his neck and Ned breathed in the familiar scent of his wife's hair. They remained like that for a few minutes until he sensed her shift and straighten her back. "But now I need to be away from you for some time" she said disentangling herself from his arms.

Ned left her room and wandered aimlessly around the castle, finding it difficult to muster the courage to face her and other members of his family again.

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Ned's mind kept reminding him that there was another person he needed to see - Jon. His nephew had kept to his room and barely stepped outside. When questioned about it he would reply it was what the King had ordered, that he was to remain at home and was not allowed to leave.

"You know that you can still leave this room, right? That's not what the King meant." Ned told his nephew.

"I feel better here. Nobody looks at me."

"People don't look at you" Ned tried to reassure his nephew only to receive a loud snort as a reply.

"You know, growing up as your bastard, I used to believe people thought less of me and I always dreamed of being someone. I used to believe people snubbed me and looked down on me for not being trueborn. But, you see, it is only now that I am someone that people stare at me with angry eyes."

"You have always been someone. And you will always be my son."

"No, I have always been a bastard. A beloved and respected bastard. Now I am hated highborn who caused a war and killed his mother. And I am not your son, uncle"

"I do not regret my actions, Jon. I would have you as my bastard rather than dead."

"I know you meant well uncle, but you have no idea what it feels to grow up as a bastard with no future to look forwards to. You could have spared me that. You have no idea what it feels like to believe yourself inferior to your brothers. You have no idea what it feels to long for a mother that you don't even know if you will ever see. You could have saved me that pain."

"I am sorry. I really never meant for this to happen. Your mother did love you very much."

"And my father?"

"I don't know" Ned answered honestly. "Would you like to reclaim some of his heritage?"

"The King said I couldn't get his name. I can't even get the Stark name, can I?, which is all I had ever wanted growing up."

"Your mother was lovely girl and your father was a prince."

"And what good does that do to me? I couldn't claim the title, even if I wanted to!"

"Do you want to? Claim your Targaryen titles?"

Jon hesitated for a moment and then shook his head vehemently. "I just want to be Jon of Winterfell, which is what I'll be for the rest of my life" he finished with a self deprecating shrug.

"And I'll be Ned of Winterfell standing right next to you" he promised.

Jon gave him a faint smile which felt more like an attempt to placate his uncle.

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Finally, the day arrived when the King and all his men would leave Winterfell. Some of the Northern Lords who had been summoned to Winterfell had already left, having paid their respects to the King and saluted the newly appointed Lord of Winterfell. But the majority had stayed. Had they stayed to witness the final humiliation of the Stark family or in support of their Liege lord, Ned mused.

Robert had all his belongings loaded onto one of the wheelhouses and waited patiently for the Stark family to gather close. He was ready. Unfortunately, he had one more passenger to add to his return trip. Young Bran Stark stood teary-eyed in the yard next to the wheelhouse watching as his chests and bags were loaded.

Robb was the first person Robert greeted as he was saying his goodbyes. He solemnly approached the newly appointed Lord of Winterfell and waited for him to bow. The King turned to Ned and nodded his head to his old time friend and Ned responded in turn. He then approached Catelyn and whispered a faint but heart-felt apology to her ears, only for her to flinch slightly and clench her fists. He stood next to Sansa and Arya so they could curtsey and then he approached Rickon to tousle his hair. He looked at Theon and they both nodded coldly. Finally he made his way to Jon and stared into his eyes. "You should have been my son" he said taciturnly and turned around leaving Jon stunned.

After the farewell formalities with the King had finished, Catelyn ran to her son Bran. She hugged and embraced him until Ned came to take her away. She looked at him with cold eyes before she let go of her young son so his siblings could say goodbye to him as well. Ned hugged his son one last time and went back to stand next to his wife. Catelyn's face was wet with tears she had long ceased to hide. He moved to grab her hand but she discreetly flinched away.

He took a look around and sighed as his family fell apart. Robb was standing tall in his new attire trying to look the part of Lord and Warden of the North, but anyone who knew him well could tell it was just a façade waiting to crack. As a father he could see the scared little boy behind the man. Theon stood next to Robb trying to be the brother he always said he was, but his eyes betrayed anger. Anger at whom, Ned was not completely sure. Was he angry at the King or did he resent Ned and his family? Jon stood to the left of Robb stoically and proud. His body was the picture of a loyal knight, but his gaze was lost in the horizon and his expression seemed aloof and vacant. Sansa was holding little Rickon in her harms while Arya was making faces at him to keep him entertained. His wife smiled timidly at the girls and nodded in appreciation. Ned couldn't shake the feeling that his lie may have been just too costly for his family.

After the royal retinue had left and the portcullis had been closed behind them, he turned around and saw a large group of his own bannermen – Robb's bannermen, he corrected himself – looking at him and his family. They were waiting.

"My Lords," Ned addressed them, but he was at a loss about what to tell them or how to even face them properly. "Thank you for staying."

"It is not to you we have to answer now" Lord Umber replied, his tone reflecting the uneasiness he felt and which was, apparently, shared by most of the men standing with him.

"I believe we are owed an explanation" added Lord Manderly.

After a short uncomfortable silence, Robb spoke up.

"My Lords, my family has just been through a terrible ordeal. I understand you might be feeling confused. As your Liege Lord I feel for you and want to stand with you. But as a man I am asking that you give my family and I some time to rest. I will ask you that you stay for a few more days enjoying the hospitality our castle and our household has to offer and that we meet again tomorrow for breakfast. We shall give you the explanation that you are owed and we will look into the future together."

His short speech was met with approval and the lords slowly started retreating back into the castle or spreading about in the yard, most of them still talking amongst themselves. Most of them nodded at Robb, some locked eyes with Ned or looked sympathetically at Rickon. Many Lords smiled at Sansa and Arya or raised their eyes at Catelyn. Lady Mormont approached Catelyn and even squeezed her shoulder gently.

Robb looked at his father pursing his lips and turned, heading straight into the training yard. He had some pent up anger and frustration to vent. Theon glanced around and followed behind him swiftly. He nudged Jon and beckoned him to join them, but Jon had other plans. He needed to sort himself out. He needed peace and quiet, so he went to the only place he could find that: the Godswood. Septa Mordane tried to be of use to the family which had been so good to her in spite of recent events and revelations. She approached Catelyn and gave her a sympathetic nod before walking up to where the girls were standing. She gently picked up Rickon from Sansa's hands and urged the girls to join her for their lessons. She was pleasantly surprised when, even though their unwillingness was obvious, they accepted without putting up a fight. Seeing that only Catelyn was left standing, Ned approached his wife but his efforts were firmly rebuffed. She quickly shook her head and decided to follow the Septa and the girls.

The North was in disarray and his family was a shambles.

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Next: The Starks need to come to terms with what happened and find some common ground before they face the Northern Lords.

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